"I can't stop thinking about you, today... tomorrow... always" - Unknown

CHAPTER 34

Mishti sat on the bed, leaning against the headrest, holding a pillow in her arms. She wondered why she felt so wrong. She knew that ending things with Abir would be devastating but she had also thought that there would be some sort of contentment. After all, Didn't all the books say that making the right decisions, however hard, will always bring some sort of satisfaction and contentment in you. But she didn't feel like that. She felt restless, wrong, discontented.

An entire week of discontent. She was surprised that Abir had not come. He had not texted. He had not sent notes through Anya. Nothing. Their relationship was done for good.

She sighed and threw the pillow away from the bed. It landed on the floor with no sound that irritated her even more. She wanted to break things and create lots of noise, any sounds that would distract her from her emotions.

Jasmeet aunty : When someone makes the wrong decision, Mishti, They don't feel happy. They don't feel contented also. They just feel wrong.

Startled to hear her thoughts out loud, Mishti looked at the room entrance to see Jasmeet aunty looking at her disapprovingly.

Mishti : Jasmeet aunty! When did you return? How was your trip?

Jasmeet : I'll tell you all those details later. First, you tell me, how could you make such a huge mistake?

Mishti frowned as they both sat down on the bed.

Mishti : What do you mean? What have I done?

Jasmeet : What have I done, she says. When you forgave the idiot for placing a wager on you, why did you break up with him?

Mishti looked away, annoyed as she felt her eyes tearing up again.

Jasmeet : Mishti, Abir Rajvansh is your one. He always has been, even before you understood what it meant to love someone. Why are you letting go of him now?

Mishti : He does not love me. What's the use of staying with him if he does not love me? And... I do not know if I trust him anymore, Jasmeet aunty.

Jasmeet : Do you not trust him, or do you not trust yourself?

Mishti sighed. Why was her beloved Jasmeet aunty troubling her with questions she didn't want to think about? Why could she not leave her alone? She stood up.

Mishti : I don't want to talk about this anymore, Jasmeet aunty. I've made the decision and I'll stand by it. Abir will find someone else. He deserves someone better than me.

Jasmeet : Uff! You are talking like those poor protagonists from hindi dramas. Those self-sacrificing ones who leave their houses, husband, kids, God know what all. Don't behave like them. If you want him, you fight for him. How long will you let him keep fighting for you?

Mishti : Abir fighting for me?

Jasmeet nodded and pulled Mishti back and she sat down.

Jasmeet : Do you even know why this wager took place?

Mishti shook her head as she tried to understand what the other woman was saying.

Jasmeet : Apparently that idiot, which is too kind a word for Jai Khanna by the way, was shouting at the club that he would marry you and thus, get money and increase his status in the Elite. They were obscene and so, Abir came and took the wager in his own hands. He said that there was no way that Mishti Singhania would ever marry a gold digger like Jai Khanna.

Mishti's eyes widened. She hadn't known the exact terms of the wager. She hadn't felt the need to do so after learning about it and then knowing Abir must have done it to protect her. She thought that it wouldn't make any difference.

But it did. Knowing the exact reason for the wager did increase the respect she had for Abir. Knowing that Abir wouldn't allow someone like Jai Khanna to marry her even before he really knew her, spoke about his regard for women in general. She sighed, her emotions fired up once again.

Mishti : Why didn't he tell me then? Why couldn't he trust me enough to tell me that this was going on? Whatever we've gone through, was it for this wager? Or does he really care for me? How am I supposed to answer all these questions?

Jasmeet : My dear, All these years you've been telling yourself to listen to your heart which has Abir Rajvansh in it. Now, why are you listening to your mind? If you close your eyes, You'll remember the truth.

Mishti : Why can't my mind be right?

Jasmeet : Let me answer your previous question first. Abir fought for you when he asked to marry you. He convinced you to marry him by telling something he has never told anyone. He trusted you with that secret because he trusts you, Mishti. He fought for you when he met Jai Khanna yesterday and slapped him for telling everyone about the wager and making it seem like you were the instigator.

Mishti looked up, shocked.

Mishti : What?

Jasmeet : Before meeting you, he went to Jai's house and defended you, Mishti. He got Jai to give an apology in the media and also to release a statement to the gossip sheets. He has always had your best interest at heart and you can't say that he doesn't care for you. You know that isn't true at all.

Mishti stood up once more and moved to stand by the window. She recalled Abir climbing up the ladder and entering the room through that same window and smiled.

Jasmeet : Even the memory of him makes you smile, Mishti. Why are you staying away from him then? And all these excuses that he doesn't love you, you don't trust him... That's all they are. Excuses. If you can't admit it to anyone else, atleast admit it to yourself. You are scared.

Mishti : I am not scared, Jasmeet aunty.

Jasmeet aunty snorted and Mishti turned to glare at her.

Mishti : I am NOT scared.

Jasmeet : The first time was convincing. The second one, not so much.

Mishti : What do you want from me?

Her voice broke and she sat on the seat near the window, finally crying. Seeing her, Jasmeet aunty woke up and hugged her tightly. She held on, seeking comfort from her tattered self.

Jasmeet : All I want is for you to be happy. And your happiness lies with him, how much ever you deny it. You've run at the first sign of trouble. Why? Are you so scared that your relationship won't survive any hurdles? Are you that insecure about the two of you? I know you feel like you're not worthy of him. I know you feel like he could not possibly fall in love with you and you ran. You chose the easy way out. Yes, Abir hid and lied and you deserve to be hurt. But you did not give him a chance to explain. You did not give yourself a chance to believe you're worthy of him. Do you really think there is a way you can go through life without him? You need to answer these questions before you make any decision.

Mishti said nothing but she stopped crying as Jasmeet aunty's words took on a new meaning. Seeing her in deep thought, the elder woman smiled and left the room.

Mishti : Did I make a colossal mistake leaving you, Abir? Did I let my insecurities get the better of me?

She paced about the room for an hour thinking about their relationship and what she would do now, when Kuhu entered.

Kuhu : Mishti!

Mishti looked at Kuhu and smiled softly.

Mishti : Kuhu! I thought you were with Kunal. What are you doing here?

Kuhu : Well! Kunal and I were thinking it would do you some good to get out of this house and get some fresh air so I came to call you. Come on.

Mishti shook her head.

Mishti : No, Kuhu! It's fine. You both go and enjoy. I'll stay at home.

Kuhu : Yeah, yeah. Do this drama with someone else. You're coming with us and that's final. Come, Kunal says he has some real special place to take us today.

Mishti : Then you go. It must be some sort of surprise for you. I'm sure you told him that I should also come along and ruined his surprise.

Kunal : No! It was all my idea and now you must come, Mishti. We won't hear any excuses.

Mishti watched as Kunal walked inside and stood next to Kuhu, his arm firmly around her waist. Her heart ached as she remembered Abir's arms around her own waist. She wanted that same comfort and safety she had felt while in that embrace again.

Kunal (softly) : Come with us, Mishti. a different atmosphere may change your perspective and thinking. You may finally know what to do.

Naksh : He's right, Leah! Go with them. Forget everything and just enjoy for a while.

Mishti looked at her three champions and smiled. God may not have placed her in the society best for her, but He had certainly given her the best family ever.

Mishti : Alright! I'll get ready and then we'll go.

She quickly changed into a simple yellow sleeveless kurti and jeans. She looked at herself in the mirror and promised herself that she wouldn't be a crybaby anymore. She would go and not think about Abir. Maybe she should give him a name like He who must not be named, like in Harry Potter. But Abir had a lovely nose, unlike Voldemort. So maybe she shouldn't compare them.

Kuhu : Mishti?

Mishti shaken out of her rambling thoughts, quickly ran a brush through her hair and followed Kuhu out and got in the car. Kunal was driving and Kuhu sat in the front seat beside him. Mishti got in the back and they set off.

Mishti : So, where are we going?

Kuhu : Oh, no! Kunal, Wait a minute. We forgot to do the most important thing.

Mishti stared at the them confused as Kunal stopped the car in the side and Kuhu got down from the car.

Mishti : Kuhu? Where are you going?

Kuhu : Mishti! Get down from the car. Come on.

Bewildered, Mishti did as she was told. However, when Kuhu tried to blindfold her using her scarf, Mishti started protesting.

Mishti : Kuhu! What are you doing? Why are you blindfolding me? Kunal, Stop her, Please. Kuhu!

Kunal : No, Mishti! We want our destination to be a surprise. So, the blindfold stays on. Kuhu, get in the back with her so that she does not try to remove the blindfold.

Mishti shook her head bemused. Was she the one going mad? Or was her entire family mad as well? She got inside and there was silence until Kunal announced that they had reached their destination.

Mishti : Now, Can I remove my blindfold?

Kuhu : No, You may not. Not until we allow you to. Give me your hand. I'll help you go inside.

Mishti : But...

Kunal : No buts, Mishti. You have to do as we say.

Sighing, Mishti complied and held Kuhu's hand as they walked inside. They had entered a building which seemed to have a really long corridor. The corridor seemed very narrow as well, allowing space for only Mishti and Kuhu to walk in a line and Kunal trudging behind.

Mishti : Where on Earth have you brought me, Kunal and Kuhu?

Kunal : Stop, Mishti!

She did and tried to get the feel of the place. They were still in the corridor, but it seemed different. She touched the wall in front of her to find that she was touching a metal mesh of squares, just like in safari vehicles.

Mishti : Are we in the jungle somewhere? Are we going to see animals?

Kuhu : What nonsense? Of course not. Now stop asking questions and take this.

Mishti took possession of something small yet heavy. She felt it all over and realised what it was. A gun. She stared at it even though she could not actually see it. She was perplexed. Why would Kunal and Kuhu bring her a gun? Where was she?

Then she realised. She was at the gun range. Kunal and Kuhu had brought her to the gun range to shoot at targets. A smile began to form on her face but it was soon replaced by a frown. How did these two know about the gun range? She was sure they had never seen her list. They didn't even know about it.

Only Abir and perhaps Jasmeet aunty had known. But why would Jasmeet aunty ask these two to take her here? It didn't make any sense. Which left Abir as the only option. Had he really told them? That didn't make any sense either. Kuhu had somehow found the list on her own. That had to be the only explanation.

Mishti smiled slightly as she held the weapon. Her list would be completed today. But without Abir. This would be the only item that she would do on her own, without Abir. It felt wrong. She couldn't do this without him. It was her list but now, it had become theirs. She couldn't complete the list without his presence here. She had to leave. She wondered where to keep the gun. Maybe she should just ask Kuhu.

Mishti : Kuhu?

Mishti waited for her to respond but when she received nothing but silence, she called out for Kunal. She didn't receive any reply once again. Mishti frowned. Where were these two? She raised her hand to open her blindfold when she felt a hand wrap around her waist. She stiffened.

Abir : Mishti?

Mishti relaxed as she heard Abir's husky voice right next to her ear. He was holding her firmly now, with one hand around her waist and the other lifting her own and positioning the gun. His face rested on her shoulder and she could feel his entire being right from her hair to the tip of her toes. She wanted to sink into him, his embrace. Though she had seen him only yesterday, she still felt like it had been years that they had been apart.

Abir : Shoot, Mishti!

Mishti : Huh?

Abir : Shoot. Your gun is positioned perfectly. Shoot.

Mishti pulled the trigger and she felt the recoil as the blank shot out of the gun. She smiled. She had actually done it. She had completed her list.

Kuhu : Turn the revolver and shoot again, Mishti.

Mishti looked at the direction of Kuhu's voice and realised that Abir was no more behind her. Had he really been here? Or had it been just wishful thinking on her part? Kuhu wouldn't have acted so normal if Abir had been here, Would she?

Kuhu : Mishti!

Mishti : Yes, I'll shoot. Wait.

She turned the revolver and lifted her hand as the next blank was loaded.

Mishti : Am I pointing correctly?

Kuhu : Yes, now shoot.

Mishti pulled the trigger once more. It felt different this time. Last time, Abir had been there or at least an imaginary version of him. This time, She felt his absence all too keenly. She wanted him with her now. She wondered if she would ever get used to living without him.

Kuhu : Open your blindfold Mishti.

Mishti : Finally!

She kept the gun on the floor and quickly removed the scarf. As her eyes got used to the light, she realised she was staring straight at Abir Rajvansh.

The handsome man with his longish hair and the love of her life was standing in front of her.

Abir Rajvansh was standing in front of her. The metal mesh separated them but he was still there. Why was there a metal mesh though? Mishti's insides froze as realisation struck her. She had just fired a blank through this mesh.

Right at the place where Abir was standing.

Mishti : ABIR!

She looked right and left before finding the door that led her to the other room. She opened the door with a bang and ran towards him.

Abir : Mishti?

Mishti : Abir!

He caught her as she fell onto him, the force of her throwing them both down on the floor. She placed her arms around his neck hugging him tightly.

Mishti : What are you doing this side? What if the bullet had struck you? Are you hurt? Are you mad? Who does this, Abir Rajvansh?

She got only a muffled response and craned her ears to hear him.

Abir : Can't..... Breathe....

Mishti realised that she was crushing the poor man and drew back from the hug and sat up. He got up slowly, coughing and taking in deep breaths. Mishti stared at him, tears in her eyes. Jasmeet aunty had been right. She would never be able to live without the man. She needed to take back her words and tell him that she needed him. Now, tomorrow and forever.

Abir : Are you okay?

Mishti : I am so not okay. Are you mad? Why would you stand in the target area? Even if I didn't shoot you, someone else who's here might have, right? How could you be so foolish?

Abir : Mishti! No one else is here but us. I booked the building exclusively for us. Did you see anyone here?

Mishti registered the fact and she understood why the place had been so quiet, so deserted.

Mishti : You booked this entire place for me?

Abir took her hand in his as he shook his head. She moved forward and took his other hand in hers.

Abir : I did it for us.

Mishti couldn't help her smile at the pronoun. It meant everything to her. She opened her mouth to tell something when Abir pulled her into a hug.

Abir : Mishti! I love you.

Mishti's eyes widened. She pushed him and drew back to see his face.

Mishti : What did you say?

Abir : I love you, Mishti! I know I told you I don't know if I can ever love. I know I told that love was not for me and I didn't even tell you this yesterday. But I never realized it until you ended things with me. I knew I could not live without you. I needed you, Mishti! I realised that I love you. I know, I know I have very bad timing and you probably don't want to hear it now when you don't want to be with me. But I needed a chance to convince you and I know I should have probably chosen a more romantic spot than a gun range. I'm so sorry for that. I have gone mad. I thought of our list and I wanted to honour it when I confessed my love so I choose this place. But look how bad and grimy it is. You deserved better, Mishti! You deserve the best. You deserve someone better than me. But I really hope you'll choose me. I am so sorry for not telling you about the wager and you are right. It was despicable and cheap of me to do that to you. I keep making decisions that I think are right but they're not. You're the one who shows me the right path always. I....

Mishti : Abir Rajvansh!

She watched him stop mid-rant and look at her mutely.

Mishti : Take a breath.

She watched him inhale deeply once or twice, before looking back at her.

Mishti : Can you breathe properly again?

At his nod, she cupped his face and kissed him with all that she had. After his initial shock, Abir too responded and the two fell on the floor again but they didn't budge.

Mishti finally drew apart from Abir and they breathed deeply letting some much needed oxygen into their lungs. Mishti looked at him in wonder.

Mishti : You love me.

Abir nodded and she nodded too.

Mishti : You love me.

Abir : I love you, Mishti.

Mishti laughed then, all her doubts vanishing. Jasmeet aunty was right in this matter too. She had broken up with Abir because she was insecure. She had been unsure if he would ever love her as much as she loved him. If he would ever trust her. But her fears were unfounded. She had been such a fool.

Abir loved her. And she loved him.

Mishti : I love you too.

She watched his eyes brighten up at her words and she felt warm all over. Her love had won. She had finally got her one.

Abir : I'm so sorry for hurting you in so many ways, Mishti. I never intended to, but the result was not what I expected. I'm so sorry.

Mishti shook her head. She didn't want any past regrets. She just wanted her future happiness.

Mishti : Forget all of it, Abir. Let's begin a new chapter from today. Besides, I suppose I should be grateful to the wager. Just imagine, if you had never done something that stupid, then we would have got married without any drama. How long would it have taken from you to realise you love me. Oh God! It probably would have taken you forever. No, no... This wager was a good idea in the end. It brought you to me.

Abir : My love! You're rambling.

Mishti blushed at the endearment. Abir chuckled and stood, then helped her up.

Abir : I love you, my temptress. My Goddess, my love.

Mishti : I love you too, my Abir. My one.

Arjun : Abir! You confessed your love to her in this gun range. But will you propose here too? Please choose a more romantic place for that at least, brother.

Abir and Mishti looked at the door entrance to see their siblings chuckling at Arjun's words.

Mishti : Arjun! Anya! Kuhu! Kunal! Naksh? All of you are here?

She turned to Abir, who looked at her with a smug expression on his face.

Mishti : You told everyone about today? Everyone knew you were about to do this?

Abir : Yes. Once I decided on how I wanted to confess my love for you, I told Arjun and Anya and got teased mercilessly by the way.

Everyone chuckled as Abir threw a death glare at them. He then continued.

Abir : Then I spoke to Naksh and he finally believed me. I spoke to Kunal and Kuhu after that. Let me tell you that your little sister wasn't ready to forgive me at all and she even threatened me thrice. It took me more than an hour to convince her.

Mishti laughed once more and hugged him.

Mishti : Aww!

Kuhu : At least, you won't do the same mistakes again. My threats always work.

Abir looked at Mishti with a soft expression.

Abir : Threats or no, I will never hurt Mishti again.

Mishti smiled as he kissed her forehead. She kissed his cheek but didn't let him go after that.

Mishti : You can propose here too, you know. This is my new favorite romantic spot.

Abir smiled but shook his head.

Abir : I will propose, but not today. Today will known for my love confession and for you completing your list.

Mishti's eyes grew soft. She watched the others leave them alone and she hugged Abir.

Mishti : If it hadn't been for the list, we wouldn't be here today.

Abir : We shall have it framed and place it in a position of great honour in our bedroom once we're married. It deserves it. After all, the list brought you in my life.

Mishti's eyes filled with tears at his sweet words and he kissed them away.

Abir : No more tears, my love. Not now, not ever.

Mishti nodded and hand in hand, they began walking away from the room.

Mishti : You know now that this list is completed, I have to make a new one.

Abir : No, Mishti. I will not survive another scandalous list and I definitely won't take you to the poker house where people can ogle you. No more lists.

Mishti : But, this isn't an adventurous list. Well, I suppose it is. But it's also different.

Abir sighed.

Abir : It sounds dangerous. What is it?

Mishti : It is dangerous. But only to your reputation as a Casanova.

Abir raised his eyebrows and smiled at Mishti.

Abir : What is this list going to contain, Mishti?

Mishti : Oh, it has only one item, Abir.

Abir : Which is?

Mishti : To make Abir Rajvansh fall more in love with his temptress each day.

Abir let the words sink in before bringing her close and kissing her thoroughly. When he pulled away, he placed his forehead against hers.

Abir : Let's go for it.

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Please do comment in detail in this last chapter and let me know your opinions to my questions...

1) Favourite moments of MishBir (in the story)

2) Favourite secondary character

3) Favourite item on Mishti's list ( other than the kiss)

4) Most apt quote for this chapter?

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I'll post two epilogues soon. Meanwhile, Please do check my other story Perpetually Mine