Warnings: Emotional manipulation, angst, lovey dovey stuff

Word Count: 3073

Authors' Note: We hope you enjoy this chapter!

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March 2015 - Tyler & Jenna's Wedding

You could still remember the look on Jenna's face when she FaceTimed you the night of the engagement. She had been talking a mile a minute, giving you every little detail from the color of socks Tyler was wearing to what he actually said when he asked her to marry him. By the end of the call, you had been deemed the first member of her bridal party.

Now you were here, watching the two of them dance under the spotlight in front of all their family and friends. Jenna looked absolutely gorgeous in her dress, although you had expected no different from someone like her. Both her and Tyler were beaming as they slowly moved around the floor, completely absorbed in one another.

Your mind began to wander about what it would feel like to be up there, dancing with somebody that you loved that much. A smile spread across your lips at the mere thought of it: his shining smile, those familiar arms around your waist, dotted with color, the curly peach hair.

Wait.

"Do you want another drink?"

Josh's voice snapped you out of your daydream. He was leaned down next to you, one hand already wrapped around your nearly empty cup.

"Yes, please." You cleared your throat and shot a polite smile his way.

"Same thing?"

"Yeah. Thanks, Josh."

He nodded and wandered off between the tables. His bright hair made him easy to spot at the bar on the other side of the room, but you tore your eyes away and focused on the happy newlyweds. They were the focus today, not anybody else.

The music ended before Josh returned. Tyler gave Jenna another kiss, the smile on his face evident even from a distance. You had seen Tyler smile countless times before, but they were never quite the same as the smile he had when Jenna was around.

"Here you go," Josh said, setting your drink in front of you. You hadn't heard him return.

"Thanks."

"Did I miss anything?"

"Just the end of the dance and the two of them being so in love it will make you sick," you grinned.

Tyler wrapped an arm around Jenna's waist and led her off the dance floor, whispering something into her ear to make her laugh. The exchange was enough to put a smile on your face too, but it didn't last long. Thoughts of Beau - who had been banned from coming to the wedding by Tyler himself - began to make their way into your mind. Had you two ever been that happy, even when you first started dating?

"Think they'll let everyone dance soon?" Josh asked. "I have some moves that I need to show off."

"You dance?" you asked, idly twirling your straw around your glass.

"On occasion, if I like the person I'm dancing with."

You raised your eyebrows at Josh, but he simply matched it with a smile. Before your conversation had a chance to go any further, two familiar figures appeared at your otherwise empty table.

"Don't look so bored," Jenna smiled.

"Not bored, just waiting," you grinned before standing up to hug her.

"For what?" Tyler asked.

"Music to dance to, obviously," Josh chimed in.

You and Jenna quickly became absorbed in your own conversation, leaving the boys to their own devices.

"I know I've said this a million times already today, but you look stunning, Jen."

"My makeup isn't running from all the crying?" she giggled.

"Nope, your makeup is still as flawless as this morning."

"Oh good, I was worried about that. You look amazing, too, you know."

"Thank you, but today isn't about me."

Jenna smiled and glanced over at Tyler. You could see all her admiration and love for Tyler in the single glance. Did Beau ever look at you like that?

"Sorry," she said, turning back to you. "I can't stop staring at him."

"Stare all you want, you only get one wedding day."

Jenna smiled and rested a hand on your arm.

"I'd love to stay and talk, but we have a lot of people to catch up with. I just wanted to come over and check in on you two first."

"We're doing just fine, don't worry."

"There will be music soon, I promise! You don't have to spend the rest of the day sitting around."

"Jenna!" you giggled. "Relax. Josh and I have been having good conversation. Focus on you and Tyler today."

"You're right. Thanks, Y/N."

You pulled her into another quick hug before she walked over to collect Tyler. He finished up his conversation with Josh before following her to the next set of people they needed to talk to, once again leaving just you and Josh.

As you took a sip of the new drink that Josh had brought over for you, loud music then filled the room to let everyone know that it was time to dance. The open space in the middle of the room that was meant to be used as a dance floor was starting to fill up with a bunch of different couples and friends enjoying themselves. You smiled at the sight, before seeing Josh's hand extend down to you with a cheesy grin plastered on his face.

"Do you want to dance with me?"

How could you resist?

"Sure!" You set your glass down and then took hold of his hand, feeling instant chills run up and down your spine as you did so.

Standing to your feet, you felt yourself being pulled by Josh, causing a laugh to escape your lips as you followed closely behind him. The music was fast and the bass seemed to pound in your chest as you both got closer to the speakers. Standing there a bit awkwardly, you forgot to mention to him that you didn't really dance, but he was sure to figure that out quickly. Watching him start to jokingly shake his hips and flail his arms to the beat made a strange facial expression present itself on your facial features, taking him in as you tried to find any semblance of a dance move in what he was doing. This was exactly one of the reasons that you adored Josh. He didn't care what other people thought. He only cared about having fun - enjoying himself.

Noticing that you weren't moving at all, he moved closer to you and grabbed hold of your arms, moving them around just as he had been doing himself moments before. You laughed loudly at his actions, causing him to do the same, as you both started playfully dancing around together.

Just as you were starting to really get into it, the music switched over to a slow song, causing you and Josh to stop moving. Nervously looking around at all of the couples slow dancing around you, you chewed on the inside of your lip before turning to take a seat at the table once more. But, you then felt Josh's hand grab hold of yours, squeezing slightly as you looked back to him. The look he gave you was almost pleading and it melted your heart.

"Dance with me?"

Staring into his eyes for a few moments, you slowly nodded your head and moved back to stand in front of him. He swallowed hard and placed his hands on your hips, making sure to be respectful while doing so as your hands rested on his shoulders. This was about as close as the both of you had ever been, besides the time he had held you in his arms. Many nights you had laid awake, remembering how wonderful it felt to be that close to him. He made you feel safe and secure whenever he was around and that wasn't a feeling you had ever had with Beau. Looking up as the both of you started swaying side to side, you noticed that he was already staring down at you with a warm smile, causing your heart to skip a beat.

It was in that moment you realized... you were falling in love with Joshua Dun.

Your breath caught in your throat, making you cough a little. Josh stopped swaying for a moment and looked at you, his eyebrows knit together in concern. You swallowed and met his gaze, trying to keep your expression neutral.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes," you mumbled.

"Did I step on your foot or something?"

Your head felt like it was spinning from this new realization. How had it never occurred to you before? Sure, it had crossed your mind once or twice, but it had never seemed so apparent as when you had seen Josh smiling at you. It was like you were seeing him for the first time all over again, but this time was different.

Because you knew you loved him.

You wanted to run out of the room and put as much distance between you and him as you could. You wanted him out of your sight and out of your mind so that Beau was the only thing left for you to think about. He was your boyfriend. Your rock. Your love.

Your loyalty.

Tyler's words weighed down on your chest and suddenly the room felt like it was too much. Too hot. Too full of people. Your feet started to pull away from Josh, but you knew that no matter where you went, you would never feel as safe as you did now, wrapped in Josh's arms.

"Sorry, no," you answered, suddenly remembering that Josh had asked you a question. "I just- there's a lot in my head."

"Do you want to sit?"

"No. No, I want to stay here."

And that's what you did. You leaned into him, letting your head rest on his chest right above his heart. He tensed at first, unsure what to do with this new form of contact, but he slowly eased into it and wrapped his arms a little tighter around you. You closed your eyes and let yourself relax, taking in the warmth of his hands and steady beat of his heart.

"Are you ok, Y/N?" Josh whispered.

His voice was close to your ear, sending a chill down your spine. You held back the shiver that wanted to accompany it, unwilling to let him know just how much of an effect he was having on you.

"I'm ok," you answered, finally opening your eyes and leaning back to look at him. "I'm just not sure what I'm doing."

"You're dancing," he smiled.

"Not entirely what I meant, but thank you for the reminder."

"Anytime."

You managed to catch Jenna's eye while you were dancing. She shot you a look while Josh's back was turned, which Tyler took notice of, prompting him to turn towards you as well. He gave you a thumbs up and turned to Jenna, giggling like a child.

Now smiling like an idiot yourself, you turned to meet Josh's eyes. There was a familiar look of admiration and love in his eyes that was enough to make your face hot. Based on the way Josh's ears were a dusty shade of pink, you wondered if that same look was in your eyes right now.

You couldn't deny it anymore: there was a choice to be made, and the outcome wasn't going to be pretty.

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You closed the front door behind you and immediately kicked off your heels, happy to be out of them after standing around at the wedding all day. As much as you loved to be all dressed up with your friends, it never quite beat coming home and changing into pajamas to be with someone you love.

Or, in this case, someone you loved.

The thought of the conversation you were about to have with Beau sent a chill down your spine, but thankfully he wasn't around to see it. In fact, you weren't entirely sure where he was. He usually stayed up and waited for you if you were out late, but the downstairs was dark and empty.

"Beau?" you called as you crept towards the kitchen.

"Lovey?" His answer was instantaneous. "Is that you?"

"Yes! I'm in the kitchen."

A few moments later, you heard Beau's footsteps echoing through the upstairs hallway. While you waited for him, you grabbed yourself a glass of water and chugged it in one go. It was gone before he even made it to the bottom of the stairs.

"Look at you!" he grinned, holding his arms out. "You look gorgeous."

"Thank you. One of Jenna's friends did my makeup."

Beau snaked his arms around your waist and pulled you into him. You set the glass down behind him and rested your hands on his shoulders, using them as a way to keep him away rather than pull him closer.

"I wish I could have been there to see you in the wedding party and everything with the other girls. I'm sure you all looked so pretty."

"I know, but Tyler and Jenna didn't allow plus ones for the bridal party," you said, putting on what you hoped looked like a disappointed expression.

"There will be plenty more weddings for us to go to together, lovey," he said, burying his face in the crook of your neck. "Soon enough, it will be ours."

The room started to spin in an instant. Beau had brought up marriage before, but never quite like this. The thought of marrying him put a sour taste in your mouth and you found yourself wishing it was Josh's arms around you instead of Beau's. Nothing troubled you when you were close to him.

"About that, Beau," you said, starting to push him away from you. "I really don't think-"

"Think what? That you're ready for marriage?"

"Not that. I think it would be better for us if we-"

"Lovey," he said, reaching up to run a hand along your jaw. "We don't have to rush into anything. I was just romanticizing, you know I want you to be comfortable no matter what we do."

Comfortable. Right.

"Beau, can you please just listen to me?"

"What?"

You swore that anger flashed across his face for a moment, but your decision had been made and you didn't want to back down now.

"I think we need to break up."

Beau watched you for a moment before he began to smile and shake his head. You felt your heart sinking as you watched his expression slowly lighten to amusement.

"Come on, lovey, I bet you're just tired. Let's get you upstairs and into bed."

You let Beau wrap an arm around you and lead you up the stairs, feeling defeated. Obviously you were going to have to find a different way to get through to him and let him know you were serious, but that would be a battle for a different day. There was no way anything was going to happen tonight after that exchange.

It's like he knew the perfect way to take any ounce of confidence out of you.

"Why don't you take a shower and then we can get in bed and watch a movie, does that sound alright?"

"Yes. Thanks, Beau," you muttered.

He pressed a kiss to your cheek and left you to shuffle across the room towards the bathroom.

After gathering everything you needed for your shower, you made sure to close and lock the door. You didn't want Beau to try and come in to start something that you knew you wouldn't be able to go through with. Shuddering at the fact, you took all of the bobby pins out of your pulled up hair and watched it fall down little by little. As you stared at yourself in the mirror, you looked over your face slowly, trying to figure out how you got here. You had a lot of good things that had happened in your life, but you were living with a man that made you unhappy and it had taken you this long to figure it out. You clenched your jaw, trying to get the sick feeling in your stomach to go away before turning and switching on the water so that you could wait for it to get warm.

Reaching behind yourself, you unzipped the back of your dress and stepped out of it along with your undergarments shortly after. Just as you were about to step into the shower, you heard voices on the other side of the door which made you quirk a brow. There was no one else in the house with you and Beau, so you just assumed that it was the television that he had turned on in order to prep for the movie you both planned on watching later.

You shook your head to clear your thoughts of anything Beau related and stepped underneath the warm and relaxing stream of water. You shut the shower door behind you and then closed your eyes, letting the water wash away all of your doubts and worries. Instead, your mind drifted to better and more pleasant thoughts such as dancing with Josh that night. The feeling of his hands on your hips and being close enough to hear the rhythm of his heart and smell his cologne was something that you could easily get used to. A small smile appeared on your lips without you noticing as his face was all you saw now. You wanted his laugh to fill every silence, his smile to brighten every day and his hands to fill the empty space within your own.

You wanted him.

After finishing up your shower, you made sure to get changed into your most comfortable pajamas and did your nightly routine before exiting the bathroom. Beau had a movie on the screen, but he had fallen asleep in his spot. You stared at his form for a moment, shaking your head, then made your way over to the bed. You laid down in your spot and tried to stay as far away from him as you possibly could, covering your body with the blankets and wrapping them around you like a burrito. You wanted as little body contact as possible with him. You turned onto your side, back facing Beau, as you stared at the wall ahead - wracking your brain on what you could do to break up with him and make him understand. Everything felt hopeless.