Trigger warning: mention of suicide attempt and self harm. You have been warned proceed at your own risk.

John's POV

"Well I dont want it to be 'And Peggy!' I want John to be in it to!" "Me to be in what?" "JOHN ELIZA DOSENT THINKS YOU WONT FIT IN THE SONG WE MADE!" "wait...WHAT!"

"John love dont take it personally it's just....*sigh* John theres no were to fit you-" "YES THERE IS!"

oh thank god. Angie always has my back. " instead of 'and Peggy' it could be 'and Jackie' "

ugh I hate that nickname. "oh that could work" "alright then let's try it! Right after Peggy says her name k?" "Got it!"

"Work work Angelica! Work work Eliza! Work work Peggy! And Jackie! The Schuyler children!"

That...actually kinda worked...

"who said you couldn't fit me in?! HA!" "Aliright John that's enough.."

did I do something wrong Eliza looks hurt. My heart sinks thinking I hurt Eliza I start to tear up.

Eliza's POV

John didn't hurt me it's just sometimes he just gets annoying.

I look at him with a straight face. Oh no. AGH GREAT YOU DID IT AGIAN ELIZA YOU HURT HIM!

"No John im- you didn't-" "I'm sorry okay!"

He screaming god damn it.

"you know what keep the song as it orianally was...you were right....there is not place for me..." "No no John you-"

"no liz I get it...just....do the song how it was...I dont fit in anywhere...I might as well just jump off a building then everyone would be happy...." "HEY! JOHN SCHUYLER LAURENS DONT YOU DARE SAY THAT IN YOUR LIFE EVER AGAIN!"

Angie is screaming now to....what have I done?

Peggy's POV

Everyone is screaming at this point I dont know what to do...I'm terrified.

I think Eliza sees how scared I am as she comes and hugs me for comfort.

"JOHN I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EVER SAY THAT ABOUT YOURSELF EVER AGIAN I WILL KICK YOUR ASS!"

Angie got relly protective since the 'incedint'.

We uh...caught John about to um...commit suicide....we talked to him..got him to tell us why....but the thing that hurt most was the cuts....there just light pink scars now you can barely see them...

but  ever since then Angie checks John's arms and legs for cuts when ever he sad and dosent talk....or is sad and dosent talk and goes to the bathroom for longer then expected...

but for the last year John has been totally clear! No cuts in sight!

Angelica's POV

"John...I want you to go upstairs to your room but on short sleeves and shorts....I'm checking you...for cuts.."

dont argue dont argue please I dont want to yell any more!!

"What no Angie I'm fine I promise you I I I-"

god damn it John

"I SAID TO GO!!!" "Okay...." I look over to Peggy and Eliza

"hey sorry I'm just heh big sister Instincts.." "no Angie it's fine we get it..." Peggy nods in agreement

"well okay." John comes back downstairs trying trying so hide a part of his hand. It's his right.

"Okay right hand first." I see the panic swell into him and turns really pale. He slowly gave me his arm letting go.

"JOHN!" there were cuts on his arm. He was good for a year already oh god!

"IM SORRY!!!" He started sobbing. "JOHN YOU WERE CLEAR FOR A YEAR WHAT HAPPEND!?!?" "I DONT KNOOOOWW I *hic* I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW!!"

"JOHN I THOUGHT YOU WOULD STOP AFTER I STARTED CHECKING YOU!" "I DID....I DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPEND!"  "Liz get some tea I think it's time for another talk..."

°°°°Time skip brought to you by the shine in lin's eyes when he smiles°°°°

After an full hour of John talking to us we finally asked the most Important question. "John what about...what did you do it for?" "I dont know....maybe I was just sad....that happens sometimes...but I dont do it..."

"Alright...John how do you think it would effect us....your sisters?" "I would imagine you guys would be sad maybe depressed..."

Eliza's POV

"Alex" "huh?" "What about Alex how would he be affected if you died huh? What about Hercules and Lafayette? What about dad? How would they respond to you dieing?"

"I would imagine Alex....would go threw really bad depression he loves me to much....Laf and Herc....they wouldn't know what to do if I was gone....and dad.....he would lose the only son he ever had...dont worry guys I wouldn't dream of dieing anytime soon..."

"good..."

Peggy's POV

"Big brother?" "Yeah Peggy?" John looks tried but sad at the same time.

"Promise me you won't kill yourself....because you're the one in the family who gets me the most...you're like my bestfriend...so dont leave me...please?"

I see him tear up I probably am the only one in the family who can get John to cry without yelling at him.

"I promise little sister...I promise.." he starts crying. "Come here big brother..." we all hug and when we split Angie makes John look at her.

"John...my little brother...I love you...dont ever think I wont.."

"yeah big brother I love you *whispers* probably more then liz and Angie combined." "Haha"

"John my twin...the guy that I share the same birthday with...the guy that has always been at my side....I love you more then anything in this life I will choose your happiness over mine everytime..." "I love you all." We go into a BIG group hug and eventually fall asleep.