Nate :

October 2011

A week had passed after the school had dismissed me over a letter "for the time being" so I could clear my head as the school did an "investigation" to prove that whatever came out of my lips was fake and I ,Natential Williams, was not in the right mind to think straight.

Like what the hell.

My back was pushed against the couch as my feet ,bare was pressed on the sides of it with my hands rested on my knees with my face blank and my eyes deep in thought.Everyday ,from time to time,I found myself just staring ,staring into nothingness.My eyes would be glued to the screen but in reality ,my mind was blank and fogged out or my gaze would go beyond the wide window ,beyond Toronto's beautiful skyline to the hell on earth that happened—to the cafeteria then the onset ,the beginning of this hell—when Thalia Ohininwaa had invited me into her horrid ,haunted house in the month of September—last freaking month.

Not even a year had passed but a month ,a stupid goddamn month.A strong urge to laugh almost slipped out ,bitter and sour and all wrapped in anger as my body convulsed with laughter as my fist clenched on my jeans tight.

It's all her fault.

I never should have befriended her ,I gnashed my teeth,I should have trusted my intuition and my instincts but I was blinded.

You're really a stupid fourteen-year-old.

You really are a little dick ,aren't yah.

I was pissed ,more than pissed.I was hurt and traumatised as my brain vividly remembers the tea I drank ,brass coloured with leaves to the stairs and it had a sharp metallic taste as it bobbed down my throat like acid. Then to the living weight and shadows of the Ohenewaa household.

Thalia had been gone for a week and yet ,her presence was still well known as it circulated on the web in various media platforms and talked on podcasts to news articles.I had no idea if this just happened in just our province and even I began to wonder if it gained momentum in other provinces or even went international.

If indeed so ,an odd feeling formed in my gut and it made my stomach ache just a teeny bit.

Dressed casually in a T shirt and pair of jeans as I relaxed,Nate style—tensed shoulders and thriving nightmares and jittery feeling.

Yes ,typical.

God ,this was about to become such a regular and normal things.Yes ,normal teens live their lives as if it was a slasher film.Constantly biting nails and losing valuable sleep.Typical.I wanted to pull my hair out and scream with bulged green eyes ,too wide and too overstimulated.I don't do drugs ,I am literally a goddamned minor.Now my life was freaking goddamned horror film,you can thank Scream and A Nightmare on Elm Street movie for that.

Now let me tear my hair off in peace.

My heart hammered harder in my chest and continued to wheeze because after that horror shit show I bolted out as his laughter,maniacal , diffused and vibrated into the depths of my mind after one stupid look at him then bolted like my pants were on fire.

I recalled after I poured my heart out to the cops who jotted down everything down with their faces ,hard and severe as they sat behind metal chairs with their crisp ,uniforms as they nodded in understanding or even mere politenes.My eyes wide and my body a bundle of nerves as I could hardly stop my heart from jackhammering in my ribs as I forced in a sharp breathe into my lungs and relaxed my tensed fingers.

But then I wondered if deep in their eyes looked glossy or eyes that went other directions or the impatient tap of their fingers on the desk to the loud tick of the empty ,grand library and to the tap of their shoes on the shiny hardwood floor.

Did they even want to be here ,at all?

They probably didn't want to be here at all and with a slight ouch to the gut ,I looked up to the wooden rows of tables equipped with glass lamps which glowed an odd yellow and computers and it alternated with empty study tables to the high shelves choked with various books with different genres.

The cops seemed to notice as they exchanged a look and the other raised a bushy,brown brow and shrugged in return.

Quiet ,good they asked no questions like as if I was grilled and just tortured over an hour ago in the cafeteria by a demon with my hair tousled and my cheeks puffed red.

Man ,I looked like sh—.I actually felt like it too.I resisted the urge to explode in loud ,forced ,manic laughter so I clenched my hands into fists then answered the same,old questions.

I wondered how I looked in the eyes of the cops with redness on my cheeks and myself out of breath with hands on my knees as if I had just ran a freaking marathon(Yeah ,my school was big but that was not that big.)I actually ran for my life ,thanks very much.

I remembered how awkward I was as they followed my clumsy footsteps and I struggled to shuffle into my seat ,out of breath and body mentally and emotionally torn and bruised.All that blood and bruises cleared away as if nothing happened.

Bastard.

"Where were you,young man?"The first cop asked ,with his brow raised as he clicked his pen and accused me of looking sick.Indeed I was.His gaze landed in my direction as I sat.A lump got stuck on my throat as I swallowed it as my ears reddened.

He narrowed his eyes and fixed his gaze on a watch as he watched it tick.His gaze on it was hot.It felt as if the room was balanced on my back and I tried to balance its heavy ,tough weight as my lungs shrivelled to the size of a prune.

His companion also nodded ,both brows raised high and fingers intertwined ,bruised and braid.

"We expected to meet you almost an hour ago and your principal told us you were free."

With a nervous finger raised and throat drier than sandpaper, I cleared my throat and told them that I was kept in the office because the parents of the potential deceased or main disappeared girl had more to say and I was chilling in the library.The last one was obviously extremely false.

But I obviously just entered it and on top of that,I was a hot and sweaty mess.

The cop nodded ,not buying it and leaned forward.The tips of his jet black hair curled at the ends and it was cropped to his head and then with his brilliant blue eyes he began to access me.

God ,I wanted this to be over as my chest rose and fell.

"Ok,"he began then pushed himself back.They didn't obviously bought it since I was a bit occupied and I was obviously supposed to be in the library but I wasn't but luckily they didn't pry but damn ,their eyes was suspcious.I felt as if I was flamed alive.Heat climbed up my neck and spread across my body and it felt as if knives were stabbed on my skin ,over and over again.

The cops obviously thought I was playing ball or running from a bunch of older kids.

"Okay,"his panther commented ,brown haired ,more severe and taller than his partner tapped his fountain pen then spread his arms."Let us begin.You are Nathaniel J. Williams and a close friend of the missing or to be know as deecsesd.You shall answer honestly as we could help discover the disappearance of the deceased,get it?"The man concluded as I nodded but I felt as if I was being talked down to and not being taken seriously.

Then with a huff the man leaned forward and began with his notes.Brow raised,"It would help because you have evidence and please do not lie."

I narrowed my gaze and stared at the badges.Mr Carmichael then to the other.Goegres Santonini.

These men did not trust me.In their eyes I was a kid and a waste of time or even a little criminal to be or a troublemaker.

With a deep breath and my palms spread on the table.I nodded."Lets begin."

He nodded then stared at his sheet.My lips quivered with a determined smile.

Their formula was remotely similar to the first meeting ,with the freaking demon and his wife ,the second one one then finally this one.I exhaled my breath then spoke.

"First question,"the one with brown hair began ,his elbows placed on the desk as he stared at me deeply and intensity as if he tried to unravel any secret that I clenched and my fingers clenched tightly on the metal of the seat as it bit into it hard.I bit my lip to resist the urge to jerk up ,scream like mad and kick the table and fall into the ground in a hysteric ,manic episode like a mad man that I am.

Aaaaah.

My feet began to tap on the floor on its own accord and my back felt tingling and it spread to my fingertips as it got harder.

Oh crap,what's happening now?I began to question.The realisation slammed into me like a pile of heavy bricks.I was getting the case of the jitters again like a rat in a cage.My clothes felt tight and itchy and my throat closed up as if it was zipped and my sight faltered bloodshot.

Write about the police interviewing Nate the questions ,asking him about his whereabouts and mental health and acting suspicious then flash forward to Nate mom receiving the letter then Nate in the hallway where he met Thalia's dad.

His eyebrow was raised as he continued his inspection as his panther ,black haired man removed and flipped through a folder quickly.

"Are you ok?"He asked and leaned forward,"are you in the right state of mind to answer anything because so far you don't look so good."

I only gaped at him and redirected my hands to my jeans tightly.

No shit sherlock.

I pursed my lips and bowed my head with a nod as forced ,awkward laughter slipped off my lips." I am fine."I began with a wave of dismissal at him as he pursed his lips."I am super duper fine.Its okay.I can answer."I replied with a wave and more awkward laughter with my fakest and very cartoony reply.With a mock cheerful happiness and a flash of fake smile."super okey dokey okay."

He nodded."How was her behaviour before her disappearance?''My blood ran cold and my body tensed with a gulp.I fingered my jeans tightly then sighed.

"It wasn't the best.For weeks she had acted strange.She didn't come to school sometimes ,shed be quiet and just before she didnt come but I had no idea she vanished."Or dead but it settled in my bones and we both knew it,we alI did.I said with a measly shrug as he looked up with wide eyes.

"What do you mean you had no idea?"He pressed.A flash of suspicion creased his face.

With wave of hand ,I replied."Well I didn't find out till this morning and it was my classmate because on Saturday we were both supposed to hang out but she didn't come so I assumed she blew me off and stuff and I was going to confront her."I answered honestly as he clicked is pen as he scrunched his face deep in thought.I ran my fingers on the desk surface and felt the awkwardness on my body thrum as my eyes was equally glued on the desk.

"How?"He began to be surprised."Don't you watch the news?"---I shook my head—"Access to internet or wifi thats a commodity now"---Again ,I shook my head—"read online articles or web pages"---I repeated—"communicate with your classmates and friends"--- I repeated— "Access to social media actually".I shook my head for the last time.Then he leaned forward."Do you have a device ,a gadget or whatnot?"I shook my head.

Both men exchanged a confused look with each other."That's very strange especially with no telecommunication."

The look he gave his panther a look, that's strange indeed.

My shoulders shook a bit.We did have wifi but we barely used it so my mom rarely bought it and she didn't see the point of me using a phone maybe when I am older then what since I literally came home at one o'clock in the morning,it was not a want but a need because I thrived on Yahoo answers.I didn't see the point of watching news since it was sad ,concerning or depressing to watch so I opted for Family channel or random flicks or MTV to entertain myself.I didn't see the point of reading ,online or physical books but comics and mangas ,hell yeah.

"Well ,how many times was she absent?"

I looked down and stared at my fingers confused,"I don't know about twice or more."Multiple times actually.I felt like they suspected.

He nodded then scribbled his observation.

The other guy glanced at his friend with a concerned look but then he waved his hands away.He cleared his throat then continued."Well ,well,well go back but that was not the reason why we are here.Lets continue."

They dismissed me.Well duh ,they came here for Thalia but I never saw access to wifi a bad thing since I had addictions to get by and managed so yeah.

I began to laugh and shudder a bit with a slight kick of legs.I began twiddling and played with my fingers.

"Oh ,really.How far did her strange behaviour arouse?"

My eyes lit up as I stared with pursed lips as I waved my hands back to how it went.

"So she's always been a strange girl.''The cop remarked as he rubbed his stubbled chin.I followed suit.

Strange was an understatement.

"Yeah,always.''I replied ,the feeling of guilt bubbled deep inside of me.My blood closed to the surface as my skin and body tightened like a knot.

Yet,why did I feel so guilty as my palms balled around my chest.My chest was heavy and uncomfortable.

Why did I feel like I betrayed someone I had established something with.

Again the heaviness and knot-like feeling contorted harder. No,I clenched my fists.This was supposed to help find her—that depends if she wanted to be found.The questions continued after I gnashed my teeth.Each question was like a bullet shot over and over again.

"What was your relationship with the missing/deceased like?"

Ice coursed through my views as I taken a back.Then I realised a breathe then continued,"Friends,"I stated as a arm,sad smile formed on my lips.Did she even see us as her friends or levarges."Thalia and I were friends—Is friends"---I was stunned by the vocabulary I had used nad it was as if I had inwardly accepted the possibly that Thalia was dead.A shudder ran through my spine as my heart tugged in my chest as if a grappling hook was buried into my chest into my throat.

It felt like an insult to a girl who walked into my life ,forced herself into my space then shoved my heart and darted away like it was nothing and only left hurt and pain and trauma in its wake.I bowed my head and stared at the table's surface stunned and confused even.

Thalia Ohinawaa ruined my life and this ,oh this.I wanted to laugh.And this was just the beginning of a horror shit show.Known as my life.

"Thalia joined the school last month,"Awkward, forced laughter escaped my lips as the cops jerked back to life and watched me with a quirked brow and stunned eyes.

"Really,how so?"The brown haired one asked with a cocked head.

"Yeah,"I nodded."Shes new.Fresh and new."

He twirled the pen with his fingers then accessed me hard."Did you tell you why she left her previous school so badly?"

I shook my head and shrugged a measly shrug,"Nada."

Deceased.Theyve already forgotten about her.

Again they both nodded and scribbled away.

"When was the last time she was active before she vanished?"

I replied two thirty and showed it with my fingers towards them.

"Did she tell you her whereabouts or that she had run away before?"

I shook my head and replied that I had no idea about her whereabouts because she never told me and I never asked and at the time we weren't even that close and I found out she ran away by our teacher (Who really shouldn't have said especially when we were all there) but I left out about the whole old man fiasco.Its not that I could even say it.I tried but my lips gaped opened and closed like a fish and my throat was tight and it hurt.

He even asked me about what Thalia's intentions was with me nad I resisted,boy I resisted ro roll my eyes.We were freaking going to hang out ,see the fuc— art gallery ,watch a freaking film then I ll show her my ugly ass room and take some stupid photos of each other like dumb ass early teens.I obviously didn't say freaking or ass and I spoke in a practised,tired tone but in reality I wanted to cry,splay my fingers on the desk and scream at their faces.But their adults and I'm just a stupid kid(Whose probably mentally insane)

Or the one that broke and shattered my already broken world,"Was Thalia suicidal?"My world froze then bisected into halves and collapsed on me.It was as if the beams or bricks I balanced on my back finally toppled over and drowned me in it or the already unravelling,dwindling rope had untied and snapped.

"W–What?"

He then pursed his lips then repeated again.

My reaction was the same and all the energy I had was sucked out of me.My arms become floppy and my legs become limp.It was as if a car had ran over me or even a freight train.I only gaped ,my mouth opened and closed.A fish out of water.It was as if the ground beneath me had gave way and my feet just dangled over a ledge.

His partner became tense and rigid as he stared at my flabbergasted reaction and placed his tensed fingers on his broad shoulder as the investigator looked at me with narrowed eyes and raised brows.

"Stop it man,"he said, his voice low, then he patted his chest softly,"The kids in shock.You come in too deep."

The man only nodded and twirled the pen.

"What?"I repeated for the third time as the cold ,icy realisation had settled in as I leaned back onto my chair.My voice came out high ,pitched and surpirsed.My gaze swivelled around as I stared at my hands as my vision went in and out of focus.All the reaction the same pattern.

By then tears had rolled down my face as I cried.My shoulders convulsed as I brought my hands to my face.I creaked and groaned and hugged myself."Thalia is okay.I know that."

A long shadow fell on me.My body tensed as I peaked.The cop stood up as his face contorted with emotion,hands stretched forward."Its okay.Calm down.You aren't in the right mind.What you're going through is called shock.Now please calm down and let us finish and please wait a while then well commence."I nodded,the world still blurry as I wiped my tears and sat but as I spoke.More tears trickled down,my throat was closed and my voice was crokay.They both exchanged a worried glanced and yet I still spoke anyway.

"Did Thalia show any signs of being mentally unwell?"The cop persited ,unknown to my fragile emotions were being wrecked over and over with narrowed eyes and pursed lips that dug into my heart and ploughed over it.Over and over like it was unknown to him that every word was a sword ,a serrated sword dug into my heart while I bleed and gurgle to death.His eyes still hard and gaze like iron.He loomed over as if I was a wild,crazed animal that he barricaded over to prevent attack.And yet he persisted.

With wobbly knees,I shot up."Thalia wasn't suicidal.She was fine.She was okay."I screamed loudly as their eyes widened then I blinked ,stunned at my outburst and I gaped.

I lied and I knew.No matter how many times I wanted to convince myself and the cops that I was A-okay and Thalia was alright.Plot twist :She never was.

I wasn't fooling anyone with my shaky hands ,blurry eyes wet from tears and forced memories from shock and the hiccups which left my quivering lips.I was yanked back to memory lane and forced to explore the narrowed,choked streets of my nightmares and forced to retrieve it from the demon which propelled my deepest innermost thoughts with his shiny,taloned fingers and ruby red eyes.

Thalia was never okay.

I was never okay.

From her horrified,petrified expression when the teacher exposed her secret on the first day of school and the rumours which accompanied her like a fog.

From her arms being covered by long sleeves and lies about being about her religion but it is ironically being forced by her dad to hide the scars and burns in which he inflicted on her skin.

When she had a major meltdown and panicked in her bed .When she exploded and asked if she was okay and normal for her creepy art ,sketches and drawings.

From her completely sheltered life.

Yeah ,the realisation finally settled like a layer of sediment.

She was never okay,just because she smiled and laughed but her eyes were dimmed of all life and happiness,drained just like me of all my youth being sucked out dry like a leech.

The leech that was her father.

Her smile never reached her eyes.

That when she pulled away from a lot even mentally and emotionally.It was as if Thalia herself knew about her brittle ,rusted mental health.She was bever truly there and was always jittery and uneasy.

She was worse than me.Which was freaking ironic even.When he was the one who roped me into this mess.

She even defended her horrid dad after all he'd said and did to her.

Nah,she was never okay,like at all.

Her creepy ass neighbourhood to the cult that thrived within and the brainwashed people who worshipped the literal ground her father trampled them on and they'd still smile with delusional expressions.

To the haunted house she lived in to the creepy old man the late night beatdown.

No she was never okay.

I shook my head with my trembled body which shivered as I regained my composure.Then I spoke,my throat was contracted by an invisible ring but I spoke,even if it felt as if a log had been rammed into my throat."You're right,"I began,my voice steady and yet it still wavered as i turned towards them,I still shivered,"She was never okay."I shook my head.

I ended up blurting out everything I was allowed to blurt as tears trickled down my face.I shook my head and kept on repeating,"Yeah,you're right she's not okay."

I realised a breath and sat back while I hugged my arms around myself.Earlier before,my mom ruffled my curly hair as I sat in the darkness lost in my mind.I had no idea how I felt when my mother got a letter mailed a few days after.When the school said a text that I shouldnt come because I am unwell and unfit till further notice then before I knew the rest of the week was over and today of all days of my indefinite suspension had drawled on.

All because I had broken and shattered the school's unspoken rule of talking too much.Of being a blabber mouth all because of what I thought I did was the greater good and I roped people into it.

I also destroyed the school's already delicate ,porcelain thin reputation by a hard punch.The school already had to pick up the already shattered shards by the PR and glue it together after the pregnancy thing and now the disappearance.

I released another heavy sigh that melted into a heavy yawn as I moaned like a whale to the flickering pictures on the screen dancing.

The door slammed shut and my mom realised a gasp,long and loud as her eyes widened .As big as saucers.Her fingers trailed her lips as her eyes raked through the letter while she shook her head.

"Oh my God,"She replied in pure disbelief.She shook her head and began to pace around the door.With a confused stare,I raised my brows and stared at her confused and climbed up the coach and watched her with concern.

"Mom,you okay?"I asked ,my voice light and shaky.Full on knowing what was written in that letter."Mom,"I repeated again,my voice rose an octave.

"Nate,how on earth did you get into this mess?"she blurted,eyes wide.

I called her out but she was engrossed in the letter and muttered words like "suspension till further notice" and "not taking enough meds" and "acting super dramatic and roping people into it."Then she sighed,ran her fingers through her strands and let out a pained,frustrated groan."Nate,why?"she began and whirled to me with outstretched hands."Do you know how much I've suffered to get you into this school only to get fucking expelled!"

"But mo–"I started.

"Don't you mom me.Do you even care at all—"She ranted ,voice raised and eyes wild and red."You literally got a letter."She threw it towards my face with gritted teeth."That was insulting you for all of this."She slapped the sheet and threw her hands up.

She ran her hands down her face and folded her hands.

"Mom,I—"I began but my voice got lost in thought.It felt as if a ring formed on my neck hard and all I did was gape.

"Do you have anything to say?"My mom demanded in disbelief.She shoved the letter and forced me to read it and I gulped as the words slipped off my lips as it told me I needed a break,clear my head and get it together.

The sad realisation that my mom was right indeed.I had a lot of shit to say but I couldn't and I tore my face away and clenched my fist as my eyes glazed over.

Why has my life spiralled into literal shit?

"No,"I shook my head and relaxed onto my seat.My mother cradled her head into her arms."Oh,my god,Nate.Why?"

"Nothing."I replied,fiddling with the hem of my baggy T-shirt.

She pointed her nose towards me with a deep scrowel."I just can't believe the school dismissed you over something beyond your control.Is not you had anything to do with this right?Right?Right Nathaniel ?"

A gulp escaped my lips."Y-Yes,I mean no mom."

She scrunched her face and continued her rant around our house then she stopped and stared at the window and watched the sky tower hide behind the towering buildings as she crossed her arms and cocked her head,deep in thought.She propped her arm under her chin."How on earth did you rope us into this situation?What the hell and how the hell did you offend such a man?"My mother demanded,brows rose and eyes wide and wild.

I stared at my mother who whirled towards me as I splayed my fingers then interlocked my fingers then trailed my eyes over the couches surface.Awkward ,forced laughter slipped off my lips as I pursed my lips.Um,his daughter."I started with a fake smile."I guess I way too close to her,I guess."

"See, this is why I don't like rich people or rich men.How did you even get expelled because the school couldn't have done it,right?It had to be her father.That man from that weird neighbourhood and that family."She balled her hands into a fist and clenched it."That had to be it,then."

I found myself nodding at the words my mom said,the reality and weight of it.The guilt that settled into my tensed ,arched body in mere pain.

"The thing is I get it.I understand why he is upset and knows he is angry and he has every right to be.He just lost his child,"my mom began to pace around the living room away from the couch,which was adjacent kitchen slash hallway as I sat completely helpless with with my lip bit and body practically slammed against the patched,stained couch A.K.A,the love seat ,as bile climbed up my throat and resisted the urge to hurl my breakfast—a cold bagel with cream cheese and a thin slab of cold cuts and the news anchor gesticulated wildly about this weeks trend—Thalia's disappearance.It shook and took the world by storm—my world and other Canadians in my provinces.

Probably other provinces too but hey,who knows.It wasn't anyone's fault as my mother had received the letter ,a few things after the school told me to go home for "further notice" or in the other words and actions.Since I had embarrassed them and destroyed their reputation by by requesting further audience about my peers.

Oh my God.

Like how was it my fault that Thalia vanished or in other words dead.The word felt foreign and gritty in my mouth.It felt as if I had swallowed grit,nails and rocks in my mouth.It felt like pure betrayal because in the back of my mind.I felt it.It was like electricity like a spike.It was like air,hot and heavy which fanned my neck and it cupped it tight.The eyes,coals and fire which burned like a stern warning.The icy,long claws which traced down my neck.Those demonic beady eyes of a demon.Thalias father coals for eyes made sure of that.

The world faded as his diabolical smirk fanned behind me as I broke up in cold sweat as my breath hitched as if a metal ring was tightened around my neck.

Never letting go.

The world faded to blue and blurry and the sound of my mom was drowned as my fingers moved to my lips as I bit it till it bled and my body was a soaked mess.

Thalia wasn't dead.

It smirked harder.Even.

"Nate,"my mom's features was like water,it wavered and blurred then sharpened but it was bathed. I'm shades of blue but it was far away.I was far away.

"Nate,"she called again.Her blurry form was as if an electrified waterfall cascaded over her.A multitude of colours.

I snapped my gaze to her and muttered but no words come out.

My breath hitched then it darted towards our only dining table.

A tall broad figure stood there with clawed fingers and pointed face.It was a shadow.Broad and black.

Then I snapped my gaze to mom.

"Nate,"she screamed again and as if I was yanked from my rigid postion.My eyes widened as it landed on her.

She groaned and threw her arms up frustrated and mad as he ran her fingers through her messy ,straight dark hair and glared at me."Whats wrong with you Nate.Is if you are barely even there."she snapped then I stared at her as life came back to my fingers.Breathing ragged.

"N-Nothing,"I blurted ,awkward laughter slipped from my lips

My mom released a sigh and cocked her head.

"I don't understand Nate.You've changed"

Everyone changes mom.But not like me.A foreign voice in my head warned me.I swished it away like fog.

I looked down at the hardwood then my white socks

I really have changed.

I grinned,forced and painful.Eyes bulged and bloodshot.

I couldn't sleep a wink last night.

All I did was gaze at my ceiling.The foot of my bed.Locked and paralyzed as my brain tried to create explanations to earthing.My eyes wild and bloodshot.

Nothing.

Lonely and in the dark as I stared at my door.

Heart hammering and shadows dancing.Eyes trailed to my door

Eyes at the clock.

The clock struck twelve.

Creepy smile, clawded filters and door left ajar.A foot was placed at the doors opening where the bar of light glowed.Footsteps echoed around the apartment.Eyes gleamed like small red suns.

So that's a rough summary of how my days went and the reality as of now.I'm currently experiencing.

"Still never going to understand that man's behaviour.I am sure he was the one who got you expelled."My mother ranted,from my seat I shook my head as she looked at me with raised brows."Then why not?"

I bunched up my jeans tight and pursed my lips."I strongly suspect the principal was part of it."I shrugged,I turned my jeans left then tapped my feet."I did try to rope my classmates in ,they spent way too much time in there and finally ,I shattered the rest of the schools."quality education for different people"I began to laugh and shook my finger."Was a total scam."

My mother ran her fingers down her face and let out a heavy groan,"I Just don't understand why expelling or suspending you.Would be a good idea?"

I nodded and kicked my legs from underneath the coach and rubbed the back of my neck awkwardly."Yup,"I murmured ,my voice low.

"Guess they finally got rid of me."I beamed,and smiled so wide and stretched my lips and threw my fist to the air.

My mom shook her head as her hair fell down like a curtain.Then she walked towards me,her heels clicked on the hardwood floor of our apartment then my mom pressed her fingers on her nose hard then handed me over a bill of dollars.

It was a crispy,fresh ten dollar bill and it fell slowly onto my palm.I stretched it forward and stuck out my tongue in disgust.

Guess mom,just recently got paid.

Nausea climbed up my throat as I resisted the urge to puke.

An image of me kicking a ball around the grass slipped into my mind.Red climbed up my neck and spread around my nose towards the tips of my ears when I remembered my moms job.

My mom pointed her fingers towards the bill ,her brows set and her eyes narrowed."Well,I do have some questions honestly and they've played with my mind for a while,okay."

I nodded and sat as my mom's shadow fell on me then she parted her legs and crossed her arms.Her lips were pale pink and her eyebrows were plucked and black.She was dressed in her typical silk nightgown and her lacy brocade robe.

"Before Thalia's disappearance,the time you went to visit her and came home at one in the morning hungry.Did they feed you at all ?"

I gasp left my lips as I stared at my moms hardened,stern face while wrinkled crinkled her face.I kicked my legs and sat back,"What mom?"

She shook her head and walked backward ,"You heard me .Nate.Did you eat any food?"

I nodded and I tried to calm my nerves and readjusted my feet then let out a breathe.My lips stretched into a smile."Yes,they fed me."

She leaned backwards and cocked her head as her hair fell over her shoulders,confused."Then why didn't you eat the food then."She paused then crossed her arms."Don't you lie to me,Nate."

My hands instinctively went to my stomach and I rubbed it.A frown formed on my lips as a familiar shadow formed on my face.With pursed lips,I nodded."Yeah,mom they feed me.But I wasn't feeling good so I didn't finish all of it.The food was good but my stomach was in in knots so yeah."I replied then spread my fingers on the sheet that covered the couch as sweat trickled down my neck and I scrunched up a sheet with my other hand.

I hope she doesn't sense it.

She propped her fist under her chin and pursed her lips in a thin line.

I smiled again,lips stretched tight.She averted her head and scroweled.She placed her arms on her hips then said,"Then why did they let you come home all by yourself.Dont they know how dangerous it is for a child to leave by themself.Why didn't they call you me ?Why didn't you alert me?I could have come over and picked you up myself."She clenched her fist."Are they that heartless to do that or because you're not their children.What assholes.You should have stayed there then come home the next day,because of how dangerous it is from my job."

My mothers job was active the time I was in that blasted neighbourhood.

"Is it because you're white?"

My blood went cold in my veins as sweat dotted my forehead as I stared aghast with widened eyes."What did you just say?"I blurted out and fisted my palms.

"You heard what I said."She repeated ,her face ticking like a clock."Mom"

"I'm looking out for you,my sweet."She ranted ,hands stretched, then I let my gaze g on the hardwood floor.She shook her head."You could have been kidnapped ,murdered or worse.They ,udt be heartless people."She slapped her forehead.

"But that's a bold assumption to make, mom."I replied,my throat constricted tightly as a lump formed on my throat.Her eyes closed and she pressed her palms together.

The recent memories of last month swirled inside my mind wilder than a hurricane and I started to sank down into painful reality.it was as if thick,black water was shoved into my lungs and a great shadow of water fell on me and my limbs went limp.The nerves in my arms went all tingling and I couldn't feel it.All I remembered was the knot in my stomach,the looming ob with dazed,angry expressions as they clapped and cheered.the spatter of blood ,and the lights that all flickered on all over the street to the howling of the dogs.A shiver ran through my spine as I remembered it and lurched forward,my heart hammered and my breath came in puffs and my shirt clinged to my chest as I breathed in and out.The insults and the tears.It all came ablur.I cradled my head in my arms and rocked back and forth.To the old man and his Cabin from Nova Scotia.I shuddered.

"Oh Nate."My mother ranted,her slender fingers ruffled my hair as my eyes get glossy.She rubbed it back and forth as I choked in a breathe,sharply."I worry about you,so much."She parted my curls,wich winded around her finger and she pressed her lips to my head.Then she left go."I don't know what those bastards did to you ,but I hope they'll get what's coming to them."

A gulp left my mouth as I wiped the river of tears which ran down my face.I breathed in,"Yeah,you're right."I sobbed.

Then from the gap I used my arms to cover.I spotted the television then I clicked the renote.The familiar colourful MTV flickered to the news,I hiccuped.

Young Girl Vanishes Causes Mass Hysteria.

It flashes on the headlines as they recapped everything that happened last saturday.Things and tones have shifted since then.

***