||TAMIA||

"Tamia is my girlfriend," he confidently responds, causing my heart to stop in shock.

For a second, I feel as if I cannot breathe. I think  I'm going to have a panic attack due to the speed at which my heart has started racing in fear. My eyes frantically search his face for answers on why he has bluntly revealed the status of our relationship. But they give me nothing.

Stilettos and the panel look surprised. Of course, none of them expected the blatantly honest response. A blunt betrayal on my end. Mr Kinya on the other hand looks intrigued and curious.

"So, what you are saying is that she lied?" Mr Kinya asks with an interested tone, staring at me instead of Joe.

I'm sure he wants to see my reaction to his response. I swallow and steel myself. I'm not going to give him the pleasure of seeing me wounded. I then avert my gaze from him and let it land on Joe. I'm expectantly waiting for his response while I silently beg him not to break my heart.

"No. I asked her to be my girlfriend over midterm," he lies, sparing me a sideways glance.

Inwardly, I smile. Although, I feel somewhat guilty for denying him and our relationship in the first place. I salute him for being so bold in front of this damned panel that is now looking at him as if he has grown stupidity horns.

Of course, they think everything he is saying is stupid. Teenagers can be stupid when in love, they say. Perhaps they are also thinking so about us. Well, to them, it may be stupid but to us, that stupidity is our strength. But how could any of them know this if they haven't been through it? They couldn't.

"Let me come to you, Kelvin Musyoka. Tell me you been to school grounds before at night?" Mr Kinya asks, shifting his focus from Joe to Sheraw's boyfriend.

He has been too quiet. Just watching his surroundings and Sheraw on occasion.

"Yes," he bluntly responds making me frown.

Sheraw closes her eyes as if she is trying to deny the fact that he has just called us liars. That too, he has indirectly stated that we have indeed been getting involved with them on school grounds during forbidden hours. A moment ago, I breathed a sigh of relief. At the moment though, I've started panicking again.

"While you were here, did you interact with them?" he asks pointing at us. Kel firmly nods in confirmation.

"Are you saying they lied?" Mr Kinya asks, somewhat sounding confused.

I give Joe a questioning look that he doesn't respond to. He just stares at me, giving me apologetic eyes. I don't understand why they are bluntly saying that they are guilty.

That we are guilty. They should be denying everything. Returning the favour or rather, saving themselves. We did our part and expected them to do theirs too. Seemingly, tables to actually turn.

Sheraws look at me with panicked and pained eyes. A look that silently tells me that she has also understood that we have been betrayed. Though she also doesn't understand why they have done it. I give Joe another questioning look. The jerk stares at me blankly this time.

It hurts. I can feel the pain silently coaxing inside me, making its presence bold with each second that passes. On the other hand, the tears that I've been restraining are fighting their way out.

Though I don't let them fall. I'll not give any of these undeserving humans the satisfaction to see me hurting from their betrayal. Stilettos, Mr Kinya and the panel too. I'm not giving them something to get off on. However, my jaw starts ticking in anger.

"They lied to protect us and themselves," Kel explains as if that is supposed to help in any way.

For all that it is worth, he had just condemned us to another offence. That is lying to the disciplinary committee and the panel. And that is something that we cannot escape unpunished. Kudos Kel.

"Then why aren't you doing the same?" Mr Kinya asks with an intrigued voice. "I mean, if they lied to protect you, it would only be fair if you also did the same for them."

None of them responds to him. They maintain silence while staring at anything else other than him for a whole two minutes. That gets him irritated because he lets out an irritated sigh. To me, their silence gets me worked up. I badly want to know why they betrayed us.

"Johnson, what do you have to say for yourself?" he asks, taking a step towards him.

"That we are guilty of sneaking into the school at night to look for them," he responds, a matter of factly.

Goodness! What the fuck is wrong with them? What did that dickhead of a disciplinarian do to them? Why can't they just deny it all? Just why? Damn it!

"Is that really the case, Joe Danson?" he asks, looking at Joe.

I also look at him, waiting for him to respond with a yes and turn my efforts to try and save him into ashes.

"It is, sir," he affirms.

I shake my head in lack of understanding and face away to look at anything else other than him.

"I find your effortless admissions intriguing. I will admit, I didn't expect you to do that. I expected to waste quite some time interrogating you. Tell me because I am curious, why did you decide to betray them?" he asks, expectantly looking between them.

Good question. I've been dying to know the answer. Johnson stares at him for a second before his gaze shifts to the clouds outside through the window.

Kel is silently communicating with Sheraw. He is probably trying to apologize for his betrayal. Begrudgingly, I turn to look at Joe. When our eyes lock, he smirks at me and that makes me even angrier.

If I didn't know him better, I'd think his smirk to be sinister. But it is genuine but taunting and I think he is insane. It doesn't make sense why he is smirking at me just after he has betrayed me. He has no single right to do that.

"None of you has anything to say about that?" Mr Kinya demands, garnering our undivided attention.

"I have something to say but it won't answer your question, sir," Joe says, stealing our attention.

"Go ahead if it is relevant," Mr Kinya tells him.

"The phone Madam Lilian took from Tamia is mine. She only said it was hers to protect me," he confesses.

Now, that is borderline betrayal! My jaw starts ticking again in anger as my heart starts withering away in pain. I want to cry. But before that, I want to slap him and possibly strangle him to death. He has betrayed me. Again. Us. Without even a shred of regret or hesitancy. Well done Joe Danson Karanja for breaking my heart once again. Well done!

"Is that true, Tamia Wangui?" Mr Kinya turns to me, his intrigue still shining on his ugly face.

"Yes," I respond, locking my gaze with Joe's.

As the maniac he has turned into, he smiles in approval at my response. I swear I don't understand the Joe I am dealing with right now. He is a very different persona from the one I know.

"It is true that I lied to protect him. Clearly, he needs no more protecting," I add, shifting my gaze from him to Mr Kinya.

"Any more confessions you wish to make?" he decides to ask, looking at Sheraw and Daisy.

"Everything they have said about sneaking into school to see us is true. Every offence written on those files, we have committed. All except the incompetence of some teachers. We just lied to protect them and maybe us," I blurt out.

"Now you have what you have been looking for. We have admitted to our crimes," I add, trying hard to restrain myself before going too far.

Thanks to the blazing anger stirred by the jerk called Joe Danson Karanja.

"That was your confession," he says, looking at Sheraw and Daisy expectantly.

"If you want to hear it out loud, then I am guilty of the offences I've been accused of," Sheraw blurts out.

The panel is flabbergasted and in shock. Of course, none of them can believe our audacious selves. But it is what it is. We all have demons that when let loose, we go mad.

At the moment, I'm mad. I'm enraged too and I would love to take out that rage on someone. Precisely, Joe Danson Karanja. If only I can have the chance.

"I am guilty too," Daisy adds with a flat tone.

"Thank you for not making it any more difficult and time-wasting," he says with a somewhat vicious and victorious voice.

I really should have taken the thought of killing Stilettos seriously. Perhaps I would have sent Mr Kinya alongside her. It is too late to do that now. They have emerged victorious and us on the losing end.

Now that they have gotten our confessions, he and the panel can freely draft the punishments they wish to give us. That is all that is remaining after all so we can call it the end. Perhaps the beginning of hell for some of us.

"You can now go and wait in the waiting room. And while you are at that, tell those weed users I am waiting for them here," he tells us.

I drag back my chair, stand and start towards the door in fast steps. If someone asked me, I wouldn't even want anyone to follow me. Once I am outside, I through the corridor to the waiting room with tears flowing down my face.

Angrily, I wipe them away but they persist. I walk into the waiting room only to startle Clarence Grace and her followers. When they see the tears spilling, their startled gazes turn into pitiful ones. One would even think they are also not going to face the hell we have just gone through. I hope theirs is a little better.

"Stilettos is calling you guys," I tell them, again wiping the stubborn tears.

Immediately they all stand, steady themselves and leave the room. After Annette walks out, Joe enters. He is followed by Kel who is struggling to calm an angry, hurt and distressed Sheraw.

Joe advances towards me with an apologetic face that I'm not going to buy even for a second. He did what he felt was right. Now I'm doing what I feel is right. I don't want anything to do with him. He can go to hell.

Crappy lies, Tamia.

I want nothing right now but to be in his arms. They are the only place that is not tainted with anger, pain, fear and anxiety. They are a safe place filled with solace and happiness.

"I am angry at you so badly that I want to slap you if not strangle you to death," I growl, pointing at him.

Upon those words, he smiles so affectionately that now I really want to strangle him to death. He is making it so difficult for me to stay angry at him.

"We both know you want me to hug you," he retorts, stepping closer and closer towards me.

To keep the distance between us, I take a step back to replace each step he takes forward.

"You are insane," I tell him through gritted teeth.

"I know, baby love," he nods in agreement, lengthening his steps.

If he doesn't stop, then we shall find ourselves chasing each other around this room.

"Stop right there," I sharply tell him. "I don't want you coming near me. Neither do I want you chasing me around this room."

To my surprise, he stops. I stop moving backwards too and stare at him, expecting him to start explaining himself. I hope he has a reason good enough. And he better starts talking right now because he is right. I want to be in his arms so badly.

"Baby love, can I explain myself?" he asks in a low tone that's annoyingly soothing.

I ignore the soothing part and remind myself that I am enraged. That he betrayed me. He betrayed us. And he needs to explain himself.

"You betrayed me. Us! For what, K~Prince?" I angrily ask, tears starting to flow down once again.

It's the pain in my heart coercing them. It pains me each time I try to accept the fact that Joe betrayed us.

"Because either way, they would have fucked us up," he responds in a soft tone. "No matter how much we lied and pleaded innocent, they would have punished us."

"Was that the reason you pleaded guilty?" I ask, wiping more tears. Again.

He steps closer. This time, I don't stop him. I take a step back either. I let him invade my space until he's so close for me to forget that I am angry at him and hurt by his betrayal.

"No, baby love. I figured that if they were going to fuck us up, then we might as well get fucked for something we have done and admitted to. I would hate to serve punishment for something I've done and then denied. For one, I wasn't going to deny you and still go home. I would rather go home knowing that they know you are mine. But I apologize for what I've made you go through because of my confessions," he softly says, engulfing me in his warm, strong and homey arms.

My anger towards him melts into a fierce passion that has me embracing him more tightly. The pain slowly fades as shades of happiness try to take its place.

Now that he has explained himself, it does not feel like betrayal. His whole reasoning is pretty much acceptable. Truth be told, I even feel good about admitting to my crimes. At least, we will feel so regretful when they give us puni--

"Wait, did you say home? They are sending us home?" I ask in a panicked voice, looking up at him.

He releases me from the hug and caresses my face for a moment as if he is trying to soothe me into relaxation. Okay, it is not like I didn't know that option wasn't on the table. It is just that I hoped they would consider giving us punishment on school grounds.

"Unfortunately, that is what is most likely going to happen. Earlier when we met your head disciplinarian, I heard him tell Dickhead that your parents were all on their way here. Dickhead seemingly also called ours," he says, letting out a heavy sigh.

"Why would he call your parents? I mean, he didn't have a strong case for you. Plus it is not like he knew you'd admit to the offences," I curiously ask.

"It is like I said, baby love. It wasn't going to matter whether we pleaded guilty or innocent. Either way, they were going to punish us but our punishment wouldn't be as hard as yours."

They called our parents. My parents. My good, loving and hardworking parents who I let down so long ago for an uncertain love story. It is over for me. I don't know how I will face them. I don't even know whether I want to face them.

Probably not. I dread facing them. More so seeing the looks on their faces when they realize their daughter might as well be the combined definition of an ungrateful child and a failure. It is over for me.

Swiftly, I turn and step away from him to take a seat at the corner. Inside me, denial is heavily clouding my judgment whilst tears cloud my eyes. I want to believe that none of this is happening.

That I have been a good girl and that my parents aren't coming to see the failure of the daughter they have. That it has to be a nightmare that I will soon wake up from. But somewhere deep in my heart and mind, I know the reality.

"There is no going back or saving us, baby love. We are doomed," Joe silently says as he takes a seat beside me.

"I know and it scares me so much. It hurts too," I admit, locking my gaze with his.

He raises his hand and starts wiping away my relentless tears.

"But what hurts more is knowing that we knew all this could happen from the start but we still tested the dangerous waters," I add.

"Are you regretting it?" he softly asks, his eyes darting on mine.

"I'll never tell that until much later in life," I respond truthfully.

Only future events will determine whether it was all worth it or not.

"I'm so sorry that we have to live through this," he apologizes, leaning in to kiss my forehead.

He lingers there for a moment until I feel somewhat calm. Fear and pain may be ravaging me but his solace acts as a balm.

"It is okay," I smile at him. "But why aren't you freaking out or stressing over like I am? You are too calm given the events happening and more bound to happen."

Perhaps he's holding it all in. But it doesn't look like that is the case. I turn and look at Kel and Sheraw. It looks like he managed to calm her down.

She has laid her head on the table at their side and Kel is caressing her back while they speak in low tones. Even he doesn't seem so stressed. As for Johnson and Daisy, it looks like they stepped outside.

"Because I am ready to face whatever comes," he responds with a smile.

"I'd love to feel how you are feeling right now," I groan, feeling jealous of him.

Instead of saying something, he scoots an inch closer and pulls me into a hug. I snuggle in it and close my eyes as I soak in all the warmth, affection and comfort. For a long while, silence prevails. Even Kel and Sheraw have gone silent.

Perhaps it is time to contemplate our actions and consequences. But I don't see the need if they will end up getting me all anxious and scared. Especially that fact about my parents coming. Well, assuming they haven't arrived yet.

"I don't suppose this is the happy ending they speak about," Kel breaks the silence making us laugh. It is a bittersweet laugh.

"Happy endings exist in fairytales and ours isn't a fairytale. It is not even close to that," Sheraw says with an apologetic smile.

"I think it could fit somewhere along the Shakespearean tragedies," Joe says.

"You are making it sound as if it is no big deal when we all know it is," I groan and they smile.

"It sucks but what can we do?" Joe asks. "But be assured that this will not be the end."

"Who wants to have a tragic love story?" Kel asks. "Definitely not me. I believe we shall have a good ending after all this is over."

"Mark it, guys. One day we shall laugh and drink to all this," Joe says making me smile.

For the first time in a long time, I feel a strong shred of hope threading inside me. One day we shall remember all this as a thing of the past.