¤ Sights
London Grammar ↲

Wonder where your heart came from
What have you done
My only friend keep on
Wander or leave
Turn into winter lights
Keeping your strength
When it gets dark at night

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Taehyung couldn't find Jungkook around campus that night. He ran all throughout the Art Department, searched the surrounding area, and went down to the guest parking lots. He sent a couple texts and called once, all which went unanswered.

The hours passed by slowly that night. Taehyung kept his phone's volume on high in case he fell asleep and Jungkook reached out, but the younger never did. Come morning, there were no new texts or missed calls at all.

He tried to convince himself nothing was wrong. The two hadn't really communicated over the phone before, so maybe Jungkook wasn't always attached to the device. It was normal not to text friends back immediately, right? Sometimes small things got in the way.

But as the next morning started to unfold, this didn't feel like a small thing to Taehyung. A knot formed in the pit of his stomach and he could barely eat. All he wanted to hear was that Jungkook was okay, that he left his phone somewhere and wasn't able to respond sooner. Hopefully when they met for their private session tonight, everything would be righted. They'd laugh about a silly misunderstanding of some sort.

During his two morning classes, all his attention went to Jungkook. When he was supposed to critique Hector Gonzales' work, Taehyung sketched images of the younger's eyes, wide and curious. In his landscapes course, he drew that lake they went to instead of the canyon displayed by a projector. Every thought he had linked back to Jungkook and wondering where he was.

Tightness gripped his chest when early evening arrived and there was still no word from the younger. Taehyung sent out a few texts before trying to call once more. The phone rang four times before sending him to voicemail. After the tone, Taehyung started talking.

"Kook, it's me. If you couldn't tell by all my texts, I'm getting worried. I couldn't find you last night and . . . You weren't supposed to go prostitute yourself, remember? Shit. Sorry. I don't know why I said that. I just want to know you're alright. Let me know when you can, okay?"

He hung up before stalking out of his apartment. A short while later, he was back at the construction site, thinking he was stupid for not checking here earlier. Scanning the group of men for Jungkook, he found a familiar head of purple hair instead.

"Namjoon!" Taehyung called as he ran up to the worker.

"Whoa, man," Namjoon said, ushering him away from the building. "No one's allowed this close. I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

Taehyung nodded his head, but stepped in front of the elder before he walked away. "Yes, I will, but I'm here about Jungkook. I'm his friend."

"Ah. You're Jin's friend, too," Namjoon said in realization, giving the younger a few more moments of his attention.

"I'll leave, just please tell me if he's here. I haven't been able to get in touch with him." Taehyung was hopeful as he asked, craning his neck to continue searching for the boy.

But Namjoon shook his head. "I haven't heard from him either. A bit out of character, if I'm being honest."

"Do you know where else I can search? Who elss I can ask?" Taehyung asked, aware of the desperation coating his tone.

Namjoon's name was called and he looked over his shoulder. "Look, I have to go. But you can check with his old roommate. Park Jimin."

The elder left him there at that, with no mention of how to find this Park Jimin person. Taehyung racked his brain, trying to remember anything Jungkook had mentioned about his past college career. They talked about his experience briefly, amazed they never saw each other given they were both in the Art Department.

That triggered something. Jungkook mentioned his roommate also was under the Art Department, studying dance.

Taehyung made his way back to the familiar building and navigated the halls to the practice rooms. Luckily there were many people here, so he asked around until he was directed to a changing room.

"Park Jimin?" He called out, earning a few curious glances from some of the occupants.

A male poked his head out from behind a set of lockers. "Yeah?"

Taehyung breathed a small sigh of relief upon finding the boy. "Hi. I don't mean to interupt, but I'm looking for Jungkook. Have you heard from him today?"

Jimin sat on a bench near where Taehyung stood, massaging his calf muscles. "Nope, I haven't talked to him since the weekend. Everything okay?"

"Fuck," Taehyung sighed, sitting on the bench and burrying his head in his hands. "Has he ever just disappeared before?"

"Unexpectedly? No, not really."

His heart was beating rapidly in his chest as his overly imaginative mind started to go wild. What if something happened money-wise and he made a drastic and ill-formed decision? What if his father - who was working in a highly dangerous factory- got injured?

A tentative hand rested on his shoulder and Taehyung lept back, the unexpected touch burning his skin.

Jimin held up his hands and laughed nervously. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. What's your name?"

"Taehyung," he answered, trying to get his breathing under control. Usually touches to his shoulders could be tolerated, but only when he knew the person and he anticipated the gesture.

"I'm sure everything is alright, Taehyung. But I'll reach out to him, too, okay? Let me take your number," the dance major said to him, pulling out his phone.

They exchanged contact information, with Jimin promising to touch base in a few hours. He had to get to a class, but reassured Taehyung that everything was probably fine. Taehyung nodded his head and tried to smile, but there was no feeling behind it.

As he left the Art Department, a sense of helplessness washed over him. Control over the situation was something he lacked, which was making him restless and antsy. Due to his childhood, having control over everything helped him to thrive. But now he could do nothing but sit and wait.

Sure, maybe everything was okay. He could be completely overreacting over something that was none of his business anyway. And yeah he'd look like a fool and Jungkook would probably think he was out of his mind, but the optics of the situation didn't matter to him.

He got back to his apartment and decided to be as productive as possible, completing homework and studying for an upcoming exam. When feelings of unease returned, he forced himself to push past and continue on. The time Jungkook was supposed to arrive had come and gone, though Taehyung tried not to focus on that.

It was close to midnight when his phone rang. Taehyung saw the caller ID and his heart lept.

"Kook," he answered in shaky relief.

There was a pause on the other side of the line.

"Kook?"

"Yeah, I'm here, Tae." Jungkook's voice lacked its usual color. It was bland and empty, like the life had been sucked from his soul.

"Are you okay?" Taehyung breathed into the phone, hands holding the device in a death grip.

An audible sigh came from Jungkook's end. "I'm sorry for missing our session."

"What? No. Don't apologize for that -"

The younger cut him off. "I can make it up to you tomorrow. During my lunch break if you're free."

"Kook, I don't care about that. We can skip that one," Taehyung said strongly, concerned about Jungkook's monotone voice. Where was the warmth and the joy, the endless energy that always prompted Taehyung to smile? "I just care about you. Are you okay?"

Jungkook avoided his question again. "I'll make up the session tomorrow. I can do it then."

"Jungkook, stop. We don't need to meet tomorrow. I don't care about drawing."

"But I do. I need the money, Tae," Jungkook said brokenly, the first hint of feeling. It made Taehyung's throat burn.

"Okay, okay . . ." Taehyung appeased him slowly, his heart lurching in apprehesion. What had happened? "How about I pay you in advance and we'll make up the session a different time?"

Another ragged breath came from the younger's line. "I don't want a hand out."

"I'm not giving you one."

"Tae . . ." Jungkook started, sounding like he was going to argue, but this time Taehyung interrupted.

"You are my friend, Kook. God, I was so worried about you. I thought I'd go crazy not knowing if you were alright. That is my first concern. And if I can help you, I want to. It's as simple as that."

There was a long stretch of silence in which neither of them said anything additional. Taehyung wanted to give the younger time and space to talk if he wanted. He'd stay on the line all night if that's what Jungkook needed.

God, what was happening to him? All he ever knew was his own needs. His focus used to be on fulfilling his wants and not stopping to check up on others. Never before did he feel the urge to comfort someone else, but in this moment, that's the only thought he had.

"I'm just so tired, Tae."

"Want me to let you go?" Taehyung offered, settling under his blankets as he waited for a response.

Jungkook's breath was distinct as he inhaled and exhaled against his phone. "No. I don't want to be alone right now."

"Okay," Taehyung answered tenderly, glad he got to stay on and talk with him for a while longer. "Are you in bed? What are you wearing?"

"Did I call Taehyung or a phone sex line?" The younger chuckled, the sound making Taehyung smile despite a growing embarrassment making him shake his head.

"I just wanted to make sure you were comfortable, that's all."

"Well, your voice would suit it. Not that I'm suggesting you go into that type of work." There was some shuffling on Jungkook's line before he spoke again. "I'm comfortable now."

Taehyung's stomach had clenched at Jungkook's comment regarding his voice suiting a phone sex line, but he tried to push that from his mind. That was literally the last thing he should be focused on right now.

"Tae?"

The elder cleared his throat. "Yeah?"

"Tell me something no one knows about you."

His mind instantly went to his past traumas, but now wasn't the time or place for that. He wasn't even sure if he could open up about those things yet.

So he settled for a rare fond memory of his. "I used to have this one nanny, Minhyuk. Her hands were always restless, so to keep them busy, she'd knit. I loved watching her create something out of nothing, and loved the colorful yarns she used for materials. One day she got sick of all my questions on it, I guess, so she taught me how to knit. I haven't done it in years, but I remember it was really calming."

"I never would've pegged a guy like you to be a knitter," Jungkook said with a tiny laugh, the sound making the elder's heart expand.

"I wouldn't tease if I were you," Taehyung joked with a laugh of his own. "Knitting needles can be quit sharp."

"I'm so afraid."

Taehyung's laugh continued as he added, "But if you're nice to me, maybe I'll knit you a scarf."

The younger chuckled again. "Just a scarf? Am I not special enough for a sweater or something?"

"You're special enough for an entire knitted outfit, Kook." His cheeks felt warm. Why the hell were his cheeks warm?

"Thank you, Tae," Jungkook murmured into the phone, his tone containing a small bit of its typical color.

Taehyung closed his eyes, almost envisioning the boy was here with him. "I can make no promises when I'll finish your knitwear, but I'll do my best."

"I'm not thanking you for knitting me a sweater, Tae," Jungkook said in clarification. "In fact, I'm begging you not to knit me one. I'd feel obligated to wear it and the construction guys would never let me live it down."

"You've just offended my knitting skills," the elder teased lightly.

But Jungkook moved on. "I'm thanking you for just being you."

His heart did that funny swelling thing again. "I'm not that special."

"Of course, you are. Tae . . . You're so special, Tae.  Anyone who knows you can see that."

No one in Taehyung's family - the people he needed to hear those words the most from - once said something to that nature. Growing up without that type of support made it difficult to believe these things now. But as Jungkook spoke thoughtfully and appreciatively, he never wanted to believe anything more.

They talked for a while longer about nothing at all, Taehyung leading most of the conversation. Jungkook's words were starting to get quieter and spaced further apart, his exhaustion weighing more and more heavily on him.

"I'm going to fall asleep, Tae," Jungkook warned the elder after neither said anything for a while.

But Taehyung just smiled. "I'll keep talking to you until you do."

And he did.

Jungkook fell asleep wrapped in the warmth of Taehyung's voice.

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》 V A L E N W R I T I N G 《

As a massive THANK YOU to my 1k followers (like what?!?!), please continue on to the NEXT CHAPTER. Yes, another double update y'all!

I'm so immensely grateful for all of you who have chosen to read my stories and offer endless amounts of love and support. As I've said a few times before, I never expected this type of community and I'm so happy to have found it.

Also, I absolutely love Tae in this chapter.