chapter two

     the clark mansion

IT WAS LATE when Cassandra got back home each night, but especially on Thursday night. She had been drilling her team all afternoon and had stayed late to make sure that everyone's uniform was impeccable and every pom pom was in perfect condition. Once she was sure that everything she could possibly control would run smoothly, she drove the long way back to her ivory tower and prayed to every god that she didn't believe in that none of the girls would slip or break anything. 

The house was quiet when she entered and she was reminded of why she was scared of the dark. There was always something about it that made her skin crawl. Quickly, she flipped on a few light switches and searched the fridge for anything that would fill her, but keep her slim size. She eventually settled for low fat yogurt and spooned the artificial peach concoction into her mouth while she tried to not let the darkness get to her. 

The metal was cool on her tongue and made goosebumps raise as the sweat on her body started to dissipate in the cool, dry air. Starting to shiver, she ran up the stairs and turned the lights off from up there and shut herself in her room—on the opposite end of her father's room. But it was quiet, so he'd probably heard her come in, even in his chamber of reflection. 

Cassandra fell back onto her bed as she felt the loneliness creep in. She closed her eyes, making sure her soft lamp light wouldn't make it in by covering her eyes with her hand for extra good measure as she started to imagine her future. One in Los Angeles or New York or London or somewhere that wasn't Hawkins, Indiana. A loving family. A home-cooked meal. Kisses on her cheek. She let out a small sob at the technicolor fantasy that she dreamed about every night to escape the desolation of her loneliness. She felt her face get hot as she wiped her tears away, sniffing as she did. 

Carefully, she sat up once more, but refused to look in the mirror. She carefully padded down the hallway to the looming dark oak door. It was in pristine condition and the gold handles gleamed in the far light from her bedroom. She raised her hand, her fingers ready to hit the door, but she paused, looked down and turned away—shutting herself back in her room. 

She did her nightly routine with tired legs and a weary heart—wiping the makeup from her face and pulling on the silk of her chemise nightgowns. She paused by the wall as she headed over to her bed and quickly flipped on the snowman nightlight that she still had from her youth, dove into her bed and pulled the blankets up to her ears. If there were to be screams that night, she would make sure that the cotton would muffle them. If she couldn't see it and couldn't hear it, then it wasn't there. Then the monster didn't roam underneath her bed and grumble while it awaited for the midnight hour to strike. Her eyes were screwed tight as she begged sleep to overtake her and cast its blanket over her mind.

It was barely sunrise when she blinked awake once more. She checked her alarm and saw she was an hour and a half early, but she knew she couldn't fall asleep again. Swinging her legs over her bed and yawning deeply, she brushed out her hair and put it up into a neat ponytail and pulled on her cheerleader uniform. There were always games on Fridays, whether it was basketball, baseball, volleyball or lacrosse, so the cheerleaders wore their uniforms to school. Her short skirt floated with her as she turned on the radio and finished getting ready for the day—the sound of Depeche Mode awakening her. 

Her ponytail bounced as she closed her door, but her airy smile fell when she suddenly came face to face with the only other person in the house. 

"Oh, hi dad." 

"Hello Cassandra. You're up early."

Cassandra started down the stairs. "Didn't sleep well."

Harry grunted as he looked at his daughter. "I can get my physician to prescribe you with something to help."

"No," she said quickly, "it's alright. Just nervous, I guess."

Harry nodded thoughtfully as he looked at his daughter and smiled. "Harvard interview today?"

"Uh . . . no," she replied quietly. "We don't do interviews until October for our early schools. It's the first game today, basketball, I mean."

"I don't remember you being on the team."

Cassandra laughed to herself a little. "I'm not, I'm on the—"

"—cheer team. Sorry. It must have slipped my mind." 

"It's alright," she said awkwardly as she held the banister and looked up at her father. "I've . . . uh got to get to school."

"Let me know when your Harvard interview is and I'll give the dean a call." 

Cassandra cringed as she gathered her bearings. "Dad I really don't—"

"Have fun at school, honey." And like that, he disappeared back into his quarters, the sound of the door closing softly being the only indication that he was there at all and the conversation wasn't just a fever dream. 

She trudged down the stairs and towards her car. She was too tired to turn on music, so she drove in the early morning twilight in silence. She drove slowly as she watched shop owners turn on their electric signs and the first lights in bedrooms start to flicker on. The world slowly stretched and yawned awake as she saw the first car on the road with her. Her hair whipped past her as the paper boy flew past her on his bike and she heard the trundling of the mail truck a few streets over. She slowly pulled into the school parking lot, being one of the first cars there. In a trance, she pulled into her parking spot, turned off the ignition and walked over to the field on the side of the main building and laid down. 

Her eyes burned as she watched the stars turn, moving time forward. She watched the black turn inky blue to violet as the sun leaked onto the palette of the sky, snuffing out the little spots of white that twinkled in the distance. She watched Cassiopeia wave goodbye as she gradually dusted into nothing, joining her siblings in the graveyard of stars lost to the sun. 

Her eyes were wide as she felt someone next to her. She didn't even have to turn to see who it was, the scent of the woods and lingering weed let her know. Neither of them spoke as she stared up and his attention divided with a knife. The question was itching the tip of his tongue, but he bit it back every time as he saw the melancholy in her eyes. Somehow it told him enough for a few seconds at a time. 

"Have you eaten yet?" he asked almost inaudibly. She only shook her head. "Why?" His tone was soft, but desperate.

"Just haven't really been hungry."

"You need to eat."

"I will. Just later, I'm happy here." He reached into his jean pocket and pulled out a smushed granola bar and laid it on her stomach. "I told you that I'll eat later, promise."

"You know that every promise you make is with your fingers crossed behind your back." 

"Jesus, Eddie."

"Eat it and I'll leave you alone." She still hesitated as she stared at the glossy packaging. "Eat it and I'll still wait for you tonight." Gingerly, her fingers opened the packaging and she carefully pulled a piece off. It was slightly warm and sticky as she shoved it into her mouth. She tasted chocolate chips first and chewed slowly. Slowly, the little tube became more and more empty as Eddie watched. "That's my girl."

Cassandra crinkled her nose as she turned to look at him. "I'm not your girl."

"Yeah yeah okay." He laughed shortly as his wide smile showed itself, creasing his cheeks and his eyes capturing the stars lost in the early morning sky. "Who are you going home with tonight?"

"Billy Hargrove." 

Eddie's eyebrows furrowed as he looked at her. "He's not a good guy, Cass."

"God, how many times have I told you not to call me Cass?" 

"He's threatened Steve Harrington so many times."

"Well maybe Steve deserved it."

Eddie propped himself up on his arm as he looked at her. "Look, I'm not part of the Harrington fan club, but even he didn't deserve it. Hargrove's out of line, Cass."

"Well he was nice to me."

Eddie fell back down to earth as he scoffed and shook his head. "He wants to fuck you."

"So does every other guy in this school." Eddie only looked at her as she could only manage to look up. "All they see is my body and I don't blame them."

"So something did happen last night."

"Not that I'm going to tell you."

Eddie chuckled. "We'll see if you'll sing a different tune tonight. Well, you'll be singing alright—"

Cassandra's mouth fell open as she shoved him and nearly shrieked. "Eddie! Jesus Christ!"

"Which one of us is going to make you sing, Cass?"

She hit his chest, making him chuckle as she fell back once more. "I can't believe you." 

Eddie chuckled, his stomach fuzzy as he looked back over at her and then up at the sky again. He heard a car engine approaching the car park and pushed himself up, dusting himself off. "I should go. The cafeteria crowd is starting to arrive with their letterman jackets and little cheerleader skirts."

"Hey! I have a little cheerleader skirt!"

Eddie stood over her with his hands on his hips and smirked. "Yeah, but you look cute in your little skirt."

She grinned as she looked up at him. "I thought you didn't go to pep rallies."

"I don't," he hummed, "I just get to take it off of you on Frida—"

"Goodbye!" she interrupted loudly as her cheeks flushed, making him chuckle quietly and trudge over, around the back of the school. 

She made no move as she listened to the cars arrive, one by one, and the chatter fill the once quiet, once serene car park. The sun was out now and the sky was its usual cheery blue. She always hated that color of blue, she thought. It reminded her of the blue eyeshadow that some of the girls wore and the color of the cars that the boys drove. She much preferred the heat of the warmer colors. 

"What the hell are you looking at?" a voice interrupted as it approached her.

"The sky," she replied quietly. Suddenly, the tall visage of Billy Hargrove was towering over her. He looked up briefly and then back down at her. 

"It's blue, end of story."

"But it's more than blue, it's—"

"Come on, let's get you up." He groaned as he knelt down next to her and extended a hand for her to take. She did and he hoisted her up to her feet. She let go, however, as they walked toward her car to retrieve her backpack and where her friends were waiting.

"Cassandra!" Natalie exclaimed. "Where the hell were you this morning? You're lucky that Steph's mom is letting her borrow her car."

"Sorry, just wanted to be ready for the pep rally today and I forgot to leave messages."

"You need to stop worrying!" Tammy piped up. "You've handled everything!" 

Stephanie eventually joined all of them, her lipstick freshly applied and her mood sour. The four girls swept into the high school silently, nearly hitting a girl with short hair in a band uniform. Cassandra glared at freshman in the hallways as she approached her locker, silently got her books out of it and ignored Stephanie's "bitch" as she walked away. 

Natalie sucked in a breath as she looked between her friends. "Cassandra! Wait up!" Cassandra paused and looked back at the girls. "How about a sleepover this weekend? My place. You bring the soda and I'll get a movie or two. We could do it Sunday and skip first on Monday?" Natalie looked at the girls around her. 

"Sounds great to me!" Tammy piped up as she beamed at the girls. 

"Yeah, why not," Cassandra grumbled before turning around again. Stephanie followed her as they always walked to homeroom together and sour moods in the morning weren't a reason to break tradition. The girls walked silently, people making way for them, even Eddie Munson, as they walked. Eventually, she made it and sat down, a grey cloud hanging over her head. But, eventually, her nerves settled in and time sped up towards the basketball game and before she knew it, she was getting ready again. 

She was in the girl's locker room tearing apart her makeup bag in search of her favorite perfume, in vain. She growled and left the room in a huff, making it go silent as she did. She trudged down the hallway and opened her locker, but she froze once she did. An apple and a chocolate chip cookie sat there, innocently, with a blue sticky note on it. "For the game," it read in his distinct all capitals handwriting. She took the apple into her hand, looked at it and took a bite. It was crisp and tasted slightly like wax, but a part of her didn't really care. Her shoulders dropped slightly as she kept taking bites and rummaged around her locker. Eventually, her fingers found the little bottle of perfume. She spritzed some on her neck and wrists before returning it to its home.

The apple and cookie in her left hand, she closed and locked her locker and headed back to the girl's locker room, her spirits rising with the sweetness of the apple and the way the juice glided down her chin, making her wipe it and lick her fingers. She felt like a child in all of the best possible ways. A child in the sense of county fairs, flying kites and infinite summer skies. She felt messy in a way that could be cleaned up. 

She swung the door back open and the conversations halted once more. She strode over to the sophomore that was clearly struggling with her eyeliner again and she knelt in front of her. "Just watch me next time I put it on." The girl nodded slightly as her eyes fluttered as the black ink glided over her eyes. 

Eventually all of the girls were ready and they all lined up, single file in front of the gym. Cassandra unwrapped the chocolate chip cookie and took off a bite. She chewed, smiled and hesitated as she felt the girl behind her shift nervously. She swallowed slowly and cursed to herself before silently whipping around and offering some of the cookie to the younger girl. Her eyes went wide and she shook her head. "You need something." Cassandra broke off half and gave it to her. 

Cassandra tapped her finger rhythmically on her legs as she turned back to face the gym door once more, listening to the announcers that were too old to be narrating high school sports and commenting on teenage girl's skirts. His hair, his smile and his laugh flashed into her mind as she rolled her shoulders back and took solace in the only place that was still only her's. The doors opened, the lights flashed and her smile turned on as the girls all filed in like they had for decades and like they would for decades to come.