Namjoon ran a hand through his hair. "Yes, it is quite difficult to explain."

"It's not that complicated." Jin interrupted as he put three glasses of water on the table in front of the couches. "It's just that Namjoonie here wants to feel the waters first."

"You know he doesn't like to talk about it. And now I'm going to talk about that topic, so it's normal for me to do it this way. Do you want me to fuck us?" Namjoon said as he gestured from side to side.

"Hasn't he always told us to fuck off?"

Despite talking about him without caring that he was there, Yoongi was looking at them in amusement, the corner of his mouth curling up unconsciously. Those two had been together for two years, but right now they looked like parents arguing about the best way to give their son the sex talk.

"I keep saying it would be better to get straight to the point." Jin sentenced as he crossed his arms.

Namjoon stared at him as if he had grown two heads. "I can't believe it. Are you going to pout?"

"I am not doing such a thing." The other answered as he turned his head to the other side and put his lips forward. He was really pouting.

Namjoon stared at him for a few moments, waiting for the other to look at him again and stop acting like a child who had just been denied a lollipop. When it did not work, he sighed resignedly.

"Okay, we'll do it your way then." The rapper relented as he flopped against the back of the chair and crossed his arms.

Jin immediately turned around, surprised that he had accomplished it so quickly. "Are you sure?"

"Of course. You're very convinced that doing it directly will give a better result, so go ahead."

The room had fallen into a charged silence that was quite uncomfortable. Namjoon hadn't looked at Jin while he had said this, but had kept it fixed on the large window in front of him. Obviously, he had reluctantly relented, and only for Jin to stop acting like a petulant kid.

Yoongi couldn't do anything but watch. What had started as an exchange of amusing retorts quickly turned into a brawl? There were no screams, no things flying. But Namjoon's simple posture, coupled with the tone with which he said the phrase, implied that he was not happy at all.

Yoongi wasn't the only one to notice, of course not, Jin probably realized before that there was something wrong when Namjoon gave in so quickly. After a few seconds, Jin turned completely in the chair, one leg resting on the seat while the other was resting on the floor. With a slow movement, he ran his hand down Namjoon's arm to his wrist, where a bracelet was embedded with an emerald.

"Forgives. I have passed." Jin apologized as he touched the bracelet with one hand and stroked the hair on the back of his neck with the other. Then he dropped a kiss on his shoulder, something simple and, at the same time, enough for Namjoon to relax and uncross his arms, his hand entwining with Jin's.

"Nothing happens." He assured her. "I think we are both right."

"We could put our experience as an example. I know how much you like to explain things." Jin suggested with an excited smile, to which Namjoon replied with one of his own. "It's a good idea."

At this point, Yoongi suspected what they wanted to talk to him about, and even though that topic was really something he tried to avoid at all costs, it's not like he could always run away either. Besides, he would rather go through that torture than watch his two friends fighting.

"Yoongi Hyung." The aforementioned looked at Namjoon expectantly. "Do you remember all the weird things I did before I met Jin Hyung?"

Yoongi rolled his eyes. "How could I forget it? You literally spent hours searching and laughing at all those dirty jokes. But worst of all—"

"Not all of them were bad, some were quite funny." Namjoon interrupted with mock indignation.

"—It's that you started learning to cook, and you almost started a fire." He continued. "Twice."

"I have improved! I'm not as clumsy as before. "

"That's true," Jin confirmed. "But you and the kitchen are like natural enemies."

"Totally agreed," Yoongi said. "Even our neighbour, the one who had just entered college, knew how to fry an egg, setting nothing on fire."

"Okay, I got it, no going near the kitchen," Namjoon said, spreading his hands for them to be quiet. "Let's go back to the topic at hand."

"Before meeting Jin Hyung, he had all these strange behaviours, and after meeting him, they broke up."

"Thank God. It's hard enough surviving Jin Hyung's jokes for you to join him." Yoongi commented jokingly.

"The point is," Namjoon continued as if no one had said anything and his boyfriend was not looking at Yoongi with a feigned expression of offence, "that all those strange behaviours I had before meeting him are now happening to you, differently. Clearly. And that, in case you still don't understand, it means that you are very close to meeting your soul mate. And I know how much you hate talking about this topic, but you need to understand that, eventually, it's going to happen and you're going to have to decide."

From the beginning, he sensed Namjoon wanted to talk to him about the subject of soulmates, something that Yoongi avoided at all costs if possible. But what he didn't expect was that he would tell him he was about to meet his own soul mate, his other half.

"Are you serious?" He asked, surprised and confused at the same time.

"Yes."

"And how am I supposed to have been acting differently? I mean, I'm still myself and, let me tell you, I haven't noticed anything different about myself. "

"You really haven't noticed?" Namjoon asked, even more, surprised than he was.

"Well, if I had noticed, I wouldn't be asking you."

"Okay, I'm going to intervene before these get out of hand," Jin spoke as he leaned forward and rested his arms on his knees, his hands crossed. "I think it would be more practical to tell you a couple of examples, so we can get out of doubt." Jin waited for Yoongi to show that he could start.

"All right. First weird behaviour: your appetite has increased exponentially. Don't raise your eyebrows at me like I'm crazy. I could make a graph of how you have gone from eating pre-cooked food to eating proper food, the kind that takes over three minutes to microwave.," Said the blond as he went from aiming at any point on the ground and then raising it to a point on the ceiling.

"It shouldn't be so strange to you. You always give me food to take home, so it's normal for me to eat it instead of throwing it away." Yoongi replied defensively.

"I'm not talking about that food, but what you order yourself in the cafeteria. Normally you have to push your plate to finish eating it all, but you have been doing it on your own for a couple of days. Like tonight, for example. "

"So is it a bad thing?"

"What? No!" Jin replied scandalized.

"Well, you make it look like it is." He said with a frown.

"It's not a bad thing, in fact, it's healthy for you to do it. But what I mean is that it's not what you normally do. And it's not just the food, but other things." Jin explained.

"Ah, but what else?" Yoongi asked, raising his eyebrows in surprise.

"Yes, there is more, Hyung," Namjoon replied this time.

"Okay then, tell me all those 'weird behaviours'" he said making the gesture of the quotation marks with his fingers "that I've been having."

He didn't really want to know. It was easier to ignore these kinds of things and make it seem like something you had been craving, like a whim or a craving. But it is not as if his friends were going to leave the subject just like that, so he had no choice but to listen to them and let out his most ironic and sarcastic side.

"The last night we all met for dinner at the usual restaurant. That night you did two different things than usual. The first was that you let Jin Hyung hug you. More than twice. And it's strange because you are not one of the people who have that gesture in public, at least not always. After a brief pause for air, the boy continued speaking. "On that same night, when we went to karaoke, you sang a couple of songs, when you normally sing one and then you dedicate yourself to warming the seat of the couch and watching the others."

"And before you answer," Jin chimed in, "let me give you one last example. You played video games with Jimin and Taehyung a couple of weeks ago. And you've never done it until now."

After a brief pause, Yoongi gave a humourless, rather bitter laugh.

"Are you serious?"

The two boys nodded.

"Well, you know it's ridiculous. I don't see how any of this shows I am close to meeting my soul mate. And the examples you have looked for make even less sense. You should be happy that I eat better, that I feel comfortable with my friends so I can relax. And let me tell you, I played a game with them just to get them to shut up. They become unbearable when they want something and don't get it."

"Yoongi, we haven't searched for anything. All we have said are things that have happened and that we have become aware of. We love you, and you know we are glad about the progress you have made. That is why we tell you this." Jin said in a soft tone of voice as if he didn't want to irritate Yoongi further.

"Don't take it as an attack," Namjoon said, using the same tone as Jin.

"It's hard not to." He said as he looked away. "It's as if you are accusing me of pretending or something, but at the same time, I know you can't do something like that. And that just leaves me confused, because then it means you are right and that I am going to meet my soulmate. But I don't want to, I don't want to have a soul mate."

Seokjin and Namjoon looked at each other sadly and not knowing what to say. Their experience as soul mates had gone smoothly, connecting practically from the start, making the whole process happen like in a fairy tale. However, the little that Yoongi had experienced concerning soul mates had left him in tatters. His boyfriend Jun had found his soul mate and, after getting to know her a bit, ended his relationship with Yoongi to be with her.

He was thankful that Jun had told him to his face and that he hadn't betrayed him while they were together. Many people did that because they believed it justified their actions, that being with their soul mate was much more important and valuable than respecting the other person. Even though Jun hadn't done it, he couldn't help but feel angry at him, as he had left a two-year relationship to go with someone he barely knew, whether the girl was his soulmate.

"I'm sorry, I know ..." Yoongi started and then shut up. It was one thing to recognize your thoughts, but quite another to say them out loud. That way, they seemed to be more real. "I know you do it with all the good intentions in the world, but this is hard for me to accept. Not that I'm against people finding their soul mate or something like that. It's just that I can't understand why I can't make that decision myself. I should be the owner of my destiny and my decisions, not the other way around. It shouldn't be at the expense of fate deciding who should or shouldn't be with me."

After a short pause, Namjoon spoke again, somewhat confused. "But you have the power of decision, Hyung. You can decide if you want to be with your soulmate or not."

"I already know that. But that's not the big problem. The problem here is that there is a person out there destined for me, but I don't even know her or him, I may not even really connect with that person."

"What do you mean not connecting? It's your soulmate, you're supposed to connect." Jin spoke with a frown and trying to understand what Yoongi was saying.

"That's what I mean. There is supposed to be a person who is my soul mate, a person with whom I am going to have a special connection, but what if he is an asshole? What if I don't even like him to be his friend? What if I don't really connect with that person? That would only mean that the soulmate system is not infallible, that there may be a mistake and that a person ends up with a soulmate that did not really belong to him from the beginning."

"But that is impossible. It is proven that when you meet that other person, there is a connection. The gems are proof of this. What happens next depends on the decision each party makes." Namjoon answered vehemently.

Yoongi just sighed and sank further, if possible, into the couch. What Namjoon said was true, but what if he was also partly right in what he said?

"Oh my God!" Jin exclaimed suddenly, making the other two jump. "Oh my God!" The two looked at each other and then at Jin, who was looking at them as if he had just had a revelation.

When Namjoon asked him what was wrong, Jin blinked a few times and then smiled.

"What's happening is that you're scared!" The blonde said while pointing a finger in the direction Yoongi was facing. He only frowned, expecting the worst.

"Scared of what?" Namjoon asked instead, and more confused than before.

"It's very clear! Can't you see it? He is afraid of falling in love with his soul mate."

Namjoon looked at Yoongi, asking him with his eyes if what the older man said was true. He just snorted. "That's stupid because I have no intention of meeting her or him, I've already told you."

"You are not even denying it! You don't want to meet your soulmate, but not because you think you will not connect with her or him; you are afraid of falling in love with her or him. God, I'm tired of saying her or him. The point is, you're afraid to discover that the system does not make mistakes and that it has hit your soul mate right."

The silence in the room was deafening; It wasn't a bad thing, but it wasn't a pleasant thing either. They were waiting for Yoongi's answer; they were waiting for him to confirm or deny what Jin had said. At this point, Yoongi knew it was an unnecessary waste of energy to find an excuse or any other explanation that contradicted what Jin had claimed. After all, he was right; he was afraid of meeting his soul mate and falling in love with her, but it wasn't for the reasons he had said.

With a deep breath, he let his head rest on the back of the chair, his gaze fixed on the ceiling. 

"You're right, I'm scared. But not for the reasons you said. "

Yoongi swallowed, hoping to undo the lump that was forming in her throat, and closed his eyes, trying to hold back the tears he knew were gathering in his eyes. He didn't like his friends to see him cry. At first, he avoided it because he considered it a weakness, but now he did it because he did not want to worry them. He wanted them to get on with their lives without worrying if he was okay or if he was having problems again. But there were times like this when it was hard not to get carried away because his own mind kept repeating to him over and over that they had already seen him at his worst, that this was nothing compared to the beginning.

"It's just that... I don't think it would work. I mean, who would want to be with me? I am not an easy person to get along with, and I do not express myself enough to let them know whether or not I am comfortable. Not to mention all the problems I have. I don't think anyone will spend their time with me if that means carrying my problems too."

"That's the biggest bullshit I've heard you say in all the years I've known you. And I am aware that there are only two, but it is enough time to meet you." Jin blurted out with a dumbfounded look and looking at him as if he was entering spontaneous combustion.

"Thanks for your honesty, Hyung." He answered dryly. He had finally held back the tears and could look at his friends in the eye without fear that one of them would escape.

"I know it sounded bad, but that's what I think. Your soulmate would not have to refuse to be with you because of your problems. It would be cruel to do it that way without even getting to know you first." Jin explained indignantly.

"What if they meet me and end up not liking me? What if they don't want to know anything about me and we go our separate ways?" He inquired with a slight tone of despair that went unnoticed by his friends, who were more concerned with trying to answer his questions.

"Certainly, it is not impossible for it to happen." Jin started as he shifted in his seat. "But that doesn't mean the same thing will happen to you. Also, many of the soulmates who follow different paths continue to maintain some contact, either by letter or through social networks. It is as if by this they mean that, although they have followed different paths, they still care about the welfare of the other person."

To Yoongi, that sounded like hypocrisy. Why would you keep in touch with someone you don't want to deal with, to begin with? And as if he had said it out loud, Jin spoke again.

"Suzy, one server, told me that someone already married her mother when she met her soul mate. He told me that at the beginning the meeting was quite uncomfortable, but everything ended well for everyone. Apparently, Suzy's mother loved her husband and had no intention of separating, and her soul mate travelled so much because of his job he didn't aspire to have a romantic relationship with anyone either. In the end, you can see that they stayed as long-distance friends or something like that, and now and then he would send her a photo of the place where he was and she would send him a photo of family vacations."

"I did not expect that kind of outcome," Namjoon spoke after a long time.

"Neither do I. It is unconventional, but not impossible for that. It's nice that they wanted to keep in touch, even if it was that way, despite not wanting to be together.," Jin finished.

In the silence that followed afterwards, Yoongi went over in his mind what Jin had told them. At first, when he didn't have his gem yet, he thought soulmates were destined to spend the rest of their days together with no matter what. It was a pleasant feeling to know that there was someone out there destined only for you, someone who would be a perfect fit for you, like a piece of a puzzle. 

Obviously, the reality was very different, but Yoongi had no way of knowing, no matter how much he had searched, whether it was true. His parents were happy together, his closest neighbours seemed to give off that same happiness, and even those people he saw every day on the way to school had that same expression of happiness and fulfilment. Find your soulmate and be happy with them. It was what Yoongi had grown up with. It was his constant, something he had seen repeated repeatedly during his childhood.

Only with time...

This story belongs to @nometoloko on AO3. I'm just her translator.

This was so long. It had to be done fam. I know, I know, I shouldn't taunt you guys like that, but wait for the next chapter guys. Hope Y'all liked it. Now let me rant as an army.

Life goes on; Absolutely no fucking words. I've listened to this song too many times to count. Every time you think, they can't get any more beautiful; BrEaThE. 

AWESOME! PURE! BEAUTIFUL!