"Hey, come on. Get up." A short pause follows before the voice turns into a teasing tone. "Wakey, wakey, sunshine... Okay, this is getting ridiculous. C'mon, popsicle, move your ass."

"Let me sleep, Tony." I mumble and pull the blanket over my head, my face buried into the pillow. He just entered my room without asking and has been annoying me for a while now. Worst is that he's not the first one who tries to get me up and out of the room, Clint and Natasha already did. Now they're luckily on a mission.

"No, I won't. It's early evening and you haven't left this room for three days now since Thor left. I thought you wanted to find Barnes?"

"Did FRIDAY find anything?" I lift my face and look up, showing a little interest and he shakes his head.

"No signs. He's known as a ghost story for a reason, that guy knows how to hide." Tony admits with a respectful, almost impressed tone and I bury my face into the pillow again, holing up back into the uncomfortably huge bed. "Oh, c'mon, get up, you can't spend the rest of your life in your bed- "

"I'm tired, okay?!" I sit up and interrupt him harshly, half glaring at him as my voice becomes petulant. His eyes slightly widen in astonishment and stare at me while I just lay back down, my back facing him. "I'm tired, Tony. Give me a break."

I only hear distant steps, then the thunk of the door. I'm left with the upcoming silence which strangely feels torturing and appeasing at the same time. Inhaling deeply, I close my eyes as they are filled with tears. The insomnia still stops me from sleeping at night and my eyes burn, I don't need to look in the mirror to know how red they are.

"What am I doing..." I whisper, questioning myself and holding the old necklace in my hand. I hate to feel that miserable, it's really pathetic, but I just keep seeing these blue eyes of Pietro in my mind, staring at me before he falls dead to the ground. It leaves a deadly emptiness in my chest, a hollow loneliness I don't know how to get rid of.

God, what have I done? I slowly open my eyes and my hand is placed on the pillow right next to my face, my fingers creating a little voltage. Of what use are my powers when I can't save anyone? The electricity vanishes and my eyelids feel heavy again, yet I manage to stare at the ceiling, the blank, ridiculous ceiling. I feel lost in the wave of pain, it's like I'm slowly drowning. I'm drowning in an endless ocean and no one can save me because everyone else who has tried died. And I don't have the strength to swim, to reach the surface of the water and save myself.

My time is standing still, yet the world keeps spinning without me. There's no desire for happiness or peace, I just want it to end. And I'm scared that this feeling may never go away, that it'll stick in my bones. I only want to close my eyes and never open them again, my wish to simply disappear grows with each second and it tears my heart apart. I'm hurting and I don't know how to stop. How the hell do I stop this? I need the pain to be gone, otherwise I will lose my mind.

The door flies open but I don't even bother to turn, not really caring about who is here now. Judging by the sound of the calm steps, I already assume it's Steve. He sits down next to me, his weight slightly drags down his side of the bed. "Hey."

"Steve, I can't do this." My voice is breaking and weak, my lips pressed together to swallow the tears. "Not anymore."

"Eve..." I don't need to look at him to know how sympathetic and painful his glance is.

"I know I'm supposed to be strong, I know I'm supposed to be fighting." My breath is flat and I continue staring at the blank ceiling. "But... I don't have the strength for that. I look at you, Tony and Wanda and all I see is... how I ruined your lives. I should have never accepted the legacy of my mother, I should've never become Voltricty."

He remains silent and grabs my hand, squeezing it slightly. I know that he understands me, we've been through a lot together. But this is my burden and I'm the one who carries it. "Bruce wants to talk to you."

"Bruce?" I now glance at him and he nods confirming as Bruce stands awkwardly in the door frame.

"Get dressed, we're getting dinner for everyone." Bruce says and I frown slightly, it's the first time that he demands something from me, even if it's just a simple and odd request like this. First, I want to protest and stay in my room but then I nod reluctantly. Those four walls would probably drive me insane anyway.

After getting dressed in the bathroom and leaving the floor, the elevator takes Bruce and me down and we walk out through the rear exit since there's always a crowd of fans at the entrance. It's a pretty rare occasion to see him in a simple gray sweater, T-shirt and jeans, he usually walks around in a lab coat. The night has dawn and the streets of New York are alive and crowded.

"What do the others want to eat?" I break the silence between us and look around.

"Don't really know, it's not the reason why I wanna talk with you. I just figured a bit of fresh air would be good for you and getting dinner would be a better reason than fighting to get you out of the room." He states and we walk around without an aim, two lost souls among mundane people.

"Well, alright, talk then."

"Remember when I snapped and blurted out my suicide attempt?" His blunt words shock me to the bones and I stop abruptly, standing still and glancing at him. Bruce has never mentioned this again, it's visible how much he actually avoids this personal topic. The following silence is almost oppressing and intense, I swallow and slowly nod.

"Hard to forget. Why are you mentioning it again?"

"Because you're looking like me at that time when I tried it. I just wanted everything to end, I couldn't stand what I saw. A monster who didn't deserve to live." He confesses and I tense up, feeling caught. "So I shot myself. Everything went black and the pain was unbearable. When I woke up, I was the other guy and spat the bullet out. In your case, it'd be different, you wouldn't just wake up again. You'd be dead and you couldn't come back and trust me, you'd regret this decision. Suicide is not an option, it's just a way to escape the problems."

Just hearing his story breaks my heart and I feel so incredibly bad for him. He went through this on his own, completely alone. It must have been awful. I breathe out a shaky and nervous laugh, pressing my lips together to prevent tears. "And what are you suggesting?"

"Accept the support you get and take your time to recover. Because you're allowed to grieve, Eve. It's okay to be imperfect and broken." He smiles sadly and I give in, letting the tears flow. Bruce pulls me into a hug and I feel a relief spreading through my chest, the burden that I carry now feels lighter.

"I'm glad you're the Hulk." I mumble, wiping away the tears. It feels ridiculous to cry in public but most people don't care about others anyway, which is why barely anyone stares at us.

"Why? I killed so many people in Wakanda when I snapped." He glances at me with confusion and curiosity.

"Because the kindest and strongest person can handle the most dangerous monster the best."

B  U  C  K  Y

I decide to leave the damaged ramshackle hut and go out for a walk to enjoy the fresh night breeze. Covered with the cap, gloves and sweater, I drown in the crowd on the streets of New York City, not exactly knowing where to go. Yesterday I already tried to remember anything by visiting a few old alleys in Brooklyn since I read at the Smithsonian that's where I apparently met Eve Farrell and Steve Rogers. But my mind stayed empty when I was there and only frustration filled my head. Why don't I remember? Why am I so broken and lost?

Lately, I've been spending my time with catching up on this time period, hiding, and reading about the two heroes from the forties and about this Bucky Barnes guy. He seemed to be a good soldier and a loyal friend, I just don't remember being him anymore. Sometimes memories appear in my mind but they quickly vanish and I can't collate them.

"Since the Sokovia incident ten days ago, there's been absolute silence at the Avengers Tower. According to our source, a new individual, Wanda Maximoff, has officially joined the team and an ally in a black suit had been spotted as well. Yet, there are unanswered questions left. What about Ultron who was every where in the internet? Who is the colorful man in the cape everyone's been talking about? But most important, who is responsible for this tragic event?"

I pass TVs at a shop where the news is being broadcasted and pause for a moment. A foreign relief is released when I hear that Eve Farrell and Steve Rogers have survived the incident in Sokovia and I let out a deep sigh. Bucky Barnes was close friends with them and a part of this feeling has remained in my chest after all these years.

Continuing my walk, my stomach growls, alarming me to get something to eat. I usually don't eat much, I'm still not used to food, even though I'm hungry like hell. I spot a grocery store down the street, considering to get something cheap until a sudden memory flashes painfully through my mind, hitting me like lightning. Eve Farrell.

"What were her last words?"

"Stay at home, I'm going to the grocery store. Don't you dare let anyone in."

Her face was as pale as snow, dark circles were around her green eyes. She looked sick in the memory and much younger than now, maybe sixteen years old. My eyes widen and my heart races in excitement, beating wildly against my chest. I remember. Not much, just these words but I remember something, it's more than I expected.

Taking out my little notebook that I always carry in my pocket, I write down the memory as the corner of my lips twitches slightly up. It gives me hope, hope to find myself back again and strength to overcome the nightmares. Even though I don't really understand this memory, it makes me happy that I remembered something about her. I'm about to continue the walk until a familiar voice stops me. Her voice.

"Listen, Tony, I don't give a damn if you want tomatoes from the Netherlands on your Shawarma, just accept American tomatoes. Bruce and I already walked to Brooklyn just because you really had to wish for Shawarma from only this joint." Eve groans whilst telephoning. The Avenger next to her only sighs tiredly and I quickly hide behind a corner.

It's her. It really is her, alive and healthy. She's not injured, no visible scars are left from the fight between us and that relieves me. I'm still becoming nervous, so nervous that I'm scared they could hear my loud heartbeat.

"Tony, I swear to God I'll spit in your bloody Shawarma if you don't stop acting like a spoilt brat! Yes, I understand you, I just don't want to. I don't care if Steve's politer. Don't call me electric witch. Also not Popsicle, you stupid trash can." She rolls her eyes, then she offers the dark haired guy her phone. "Please, talk to him."

"Fine but I can't make any promises." The man takes the phone and now I recognize him. Doctor Bruce Banner, also known as the Hulk. He used to be one of Hydra's most wanted targets until they figured it'd be too dangerous to take him down. "Tony, I'll call Pepper if this won't stop. Good, we'll be back at nine."

Banner hangs up and Eve lifts an eyebrow. "That worked?"

"Usually. I spend way too much time with this guy, I should know him." The doctor shrugs and a light grin appears on her lips. I suddenly feel a pain stabbing my heart as I stay hidden in the dark corner.

Her life seems so normal and uncomplicated without me, now I'm even more confused why she was willing to die for me. It doesn't make any sense. It doesn't look like she needs me. Maybe it'd be better if I disappear. These thoughts somehow manage to ache my heart and I don't feel hungry anymore. Quietly like a ghost, I go back into the shadows.

A/N- And the end of the story starts! I'm getting emotional haha :')