I've already been waiting for twenty minutes for Howard Stark, he's really late. Mr Jarvis informed me that he's gonna visit me every hour with tea that he apparently really likes which I genuinely appreciate. The lab is empty and the boredom is almost unbearable, impatience has always been my weakness. I start looking around and all the different buttons make me want to press them but I'm aware of the disastrous consequences, it's better if I don't touch them at all.

The files on the desk catch my attention and I try to find my file, curious about the information they've got about me. Instead, the first document in my hands is about something else, not even a person, more about an organization. I frown at the name, it sounds absolutely strange and ridiculous. What the hell is Hydra?

"God, I'm like the most important person here, I actually even pay for everything and I still need to stand in line for breakfast! Anyway, I'm here now and I know it's boring without me, so I tried to hurry up." Howard's whiny voice behind me would have made me groan if I wasn't busy looking through the file.

"What's Hydra?" I turn around, showing him the papers and he raises a brow in the air. He immediately takes it away from me and puts it into the drawer.

"You weren't supposed to read this, this is classified." It's the first time that he sounds at least 30% serious.

"Classified means important and I should know important things since, you know, I'm like the most important person here, I'm actually even the subject." I quote his words that he used before.

"Why do you have to be quick at repartee?" He sighs.

"If we're forced to work together, then we should trust each other. Don't you think so, Mr Stark?" I tilt my head provokingly, causing him to grin.

"Call me Howard if we should trust each other." He opens the file and shows me a symbol of a skull with weird tentacles, colored in red and black. It looks dangerous, almost seems to be a death threat. "Hydra is Hitler's special weapons division, basically the german version of the SSR. The problem is that their technology is much more progressed. Johann Schmidt, not even good-looking by the way, is the leader."

"They're our enemy." I sum it up, staring at Hydra's terrifying symbol that somehow makes my chest tight. I don't have a good feeling about this at all.

"Yeah, and we try to have an advantage with the super-soldier serum. They once tried to attack me which made me join the SSR."

"Well, then we have to be better." I now glance challenging at him. "You're the best of the best, aren't you? And I'm a determined test subject. A good team."

"Commendable attitude, Evelyn." He smirks and I roll my eyes at the name, causing him to laugh. "Is it that bad? It's a beautiful name for a great woman."

"My mother gave me this name, which is why I don't want to have it. So don't call me  that if you want to be my ally. Evelyn is the name that my mother owns. Eve is the name that just I own." I state matter-of-factly. "Did you hear about her?"

"Good agent, retired decades ago. She just left." He takes out a syringe to take some of my blood that he told me about yesterday. A short twitch is caused by the needle in my arm but I just sit quietly. "I couldn't know her since I grew up on the lower east side and was just six when she disappeared for good."

"Wait a moment, you weren't born in the glamorous, rich part of Manhattan?" I raise a brow in the air and he slightly chuckles while removing the needle and placing a patch on my arm.

"Nope. My father sold fruit and my mother sewed shirtwaists for a factory. I just happen to be perfect."

"Wow, you almost got my sympathy for a second." I scoff. But the fact that he hasn't always been a spoilt and rich brat makes me accept his personality a little bit more.

"I think you deserve a lot more sympathy than I do. Orphan in Brooklyn, abandoned by your own mother- doesn't sound like a good life." He shrugs. "I bet you have never tasted really good bacon."

"It still is a good life." I disagree, thinking of Bucky and Steve. We had our ups and lows but in the end, I regret nothing. "It's true. I never tasted really good bacon- to be honest, I'm not really sure what that is. I couldn't afford the train ticket to get back home from Rockaway Beach, so I had to sneak into an ice truck. I've been in more alley fights than I can count. And I always shower with cold water because I live in Brooklyn. But I still think that my life is good excluding the war because I could laugh. I could live. I learned to appreciate things."

Howard's face falls, his childish and arrogant attitude disappears and he is quiet. His brown eyes hang on to me, his stare is that intense that I almost frown at him. "Eve Farrell, it's worth repeating that it's an honor to work with you."

"I hope that I'll feel honored to work with you too." I half smile. His reaction sort of reminds me of Bucky and just now I realize that Bucky has always been staring at me. God, why do I have to be such a fool when it's about love? Because no one taught you how to love. I try to shake off the weird feeling and distract myself with another topic. Otherwise I would have to think of Bucky being on the field again and then I'd freak out. "What's our plan today?"

"Endurance test. We just want to know how long you can run." Howard takes out a timer and motions me to follow him. We walk to the door that leads us to another room, a treadmill is placed in the center of it, next to Mr Jarvis.

"Good morning again, Miss Farrell." He greets me friendly. I couldn't convince him to call me Eve, he's just too polite for that. "I prepared a towel and cold water for you, also tea that I promised."

"I look forward to the tea, but a lot less forward to running." I smile at him and hear Howard's chuckle. "Could we listen to music?"

"Jarvis, you heard the lady. Put on some good old Jazz." Howard commands and seconds later, the beautiful sound of a trombone fills the air. I go on the treadmill and Howard activates it, then I start running. "So, Eve, any secret talents?"

"Are you serious? Now?" I tilt my head, finding his timing really unsuitable. He just nods, smirking and I roll my eyes. "I like to sing and I know how to play the piano. Cooking is okay and uh... I used to work for a dressmaker's shop."

"Why won't you sing a little song for us then?"

"Now you're kidding me." I huff, slowly starting to breathe heavily. Running and talking are a bad combination, let alone singing.

"Just joking." He grins, continuing with his questions. "What makes you angry?"

"Are you my therapist?" I groan but he just waits for an answer. Mr Jarvis behind him nods to me, signaling me just to answer the question because Howard won't give up. "I hate being helpless. Once my best friend got beat up because of me and I couldn't do anything but watch. I want to be strong instead of weak, I guess."

"And that's why, I'm here." He smiles promising.

"And what makes you angry?" I ask him and he doesn't answer, he just avoids the question. I frown, not understanding why I have to reveal information about me while he doesn't. Mr Jarvis just presses his lips together, knowing that Howard won't answer. I give up and will confront him later.

After a while, I start sweating and have problems with breathing, my throat also hurts like hell. How could Bucky and Steve even survive this? Especially Steve who suffers from asthma. What if he got an asthma attack? Stop thinking of them, just stop, I force myself as my worries come back. The imagination of Bucky being surrounded by bombs and german soldiers makes me anxious and I'm not even sure anymore if I have breathing problems because of running or my anxiety. What if he's already dead? What if there's a letter waiting for me in Brooklyn?

"Hey, Eve? You can stop now, you're a bit too pale." Howard lets me know but I keep running. He could be dead. He could be dead. "Eve? Eve!"

"Miss Farrell!" Mr Jarvis calls me and I suddenly feel how the ground beneath my feet stop moving and I almost fall. I look up, grabbing the the metal rod and seeing that Howard has turned off the treadmill. Jarvis brings me the cold water bottle that I drink quickly. "The endurance test just exists to compare your endurance after taking the serum."

"Is everything okay?" Howard asks me half concerned, handing me the towel and I'm shaking slightly, trying to catch my breath.

"I- I may just need some air." Right now, it's possible that I lose the only people that really matter to me. I need to see the photo, I need to see them before the dizziness takes me over. "How long did I run?"

"Almost thirty minutes. I am truly sorry but it's too dangerous to leave the building and also against the rules- "

"It won't hurt to break them once or twice. I mean, what can they do? Throw us out?" Howard interrupts Jarvis and strokes my back, trying to help me. He simply ignores Mr Jarvis' stern look and leads me to the door. "Come on, some fresh air will color your face again."

We pass the people who shoot us curious glances but stay quiet, knowing that Howard would do something unpleasant if they stepped in. Through the elevator, we arrive at the library and leave the building. I would have never expected to miss the sun that much, just after 24 hours not seeing the brightness. But the room without windows made me feel like a bird in a cage, trapped in the darkness.

"Feeling better now?" Howard looks at me and I slightly nod, the sickness in my stomach vanishes. I inhale the fresh air and the rays of sunshine, closing my eyes to calm down. "You had a panic attack. What's wrong?"

"I hate treadmills." I lie and he rolls with his eyes.

"I became rich through lying, so don't even think you can lie to me." He tilts his head and I hate how he forces me to tell him, a basically stranger, the truth. But I owe him at least that since he broke the rules for me.

"In my whole life, there were just two people who truly cared about me and loved me. In different ways." I add, steadying my breath. "Just two. And I couldn't ask for more. Now both are in the army, one of them is even in the war zone. And I seriously don't know what I would do if they died. They made me who I am today, they changed the quiet girl I used to be. One of the reasons why I agreed to the experiment is that I have nothing to lose."

He takes a deep breath, staring at the Big Ben in the distance. "My inventions make me angry."

"What?" I frown and look up, sitting on the stairs. He sighs and is more serious than ever.

"I just create destruction. The Manhattan Project... I was part of it. I helped to create the atomic bomb, a brutal weapon to destroy everything. And I feel guilty but I can't stop my mind from inventing things."

"You're afraid of yourself." I read his mind. "Why are you telling me this?"

"Everyone's afraid of something but you don't have to be when nothing has happened yet. It's just a waste of time." His words are for the first time profound and meaningful which impresses me. "But don't tell that to anyone, I don't want to ruin my image."

"We of course don't want that." I roll my eyes, my voice laced with sarcasm, but I feel a bit better now. "Are you also scared that this invention, this experiment of yours will be doomed?"

"No." He shakes his head and is pretty confident. "I am sure that this will be a success. And I actually have an idea. You could write a letter to your friends, I don't see why this should be problematic. They'll probably receive it in a few weeks then. The only thing you're not allowed to write is the exact location because of german spies."

"That sounds like a good idea." I admit, smiling at the thought that Bucky can receive a letter from me. Although he may be still mad at me when I think of his last words.

"I'll even pay."

"Oh, be careful. It's possible that you're then not a multimillionaire anymore but only a poor millionaire." I say sarcastically and he chuckles.

"You'd love me anyway. We're done for today, there should be paper and a pen in your room." He lets me know. "Now go before I force you."

I stand up and walk back to the building but before I enter, I turn around and shoot him a halfhearted smile. It is somehow difficult for me to say that, maybe because of his high status. "Thank you, Howard."

I don't wait for his reaction because I'm way too impatient to finally write the letters. Arriving at my room, I even see a cup of tea with a celestial smell and thank mentally Mr Jarvis for his attempt to cheer me up. I find paper and pens in the drawer and I start writing for Steve.

Dear Steve,
I hope you are alright and please, do me a favor and don't get into trouble. I'm already concerned enough about you. Do you remember when we talked about the places we wanted to visit? I'm at the third place right now and it's really beautiful here, even better than in the photos. The people here are actually nice, so please don't waste your time worrying about me. And don't forget one thing- muscles are not important. What counts is your heart, prove them that courage is more important. I miss you.

- Eve