K A D E N

Even though the incident with the article had eventually blown over, it took me a lot longer to calm down. But that too, the anger that had consumed me in the first few days, had fizzled down to just a spark. I returned to earth, to the the mundane act of doing homework. 

The library wasn't the most liveliest place but it was better than sitting at home, overthinking, drinking and not sleeping. I stared at the blank word document (excluding my name written in the top left corner) and wondered why I'd decided to take history in the first place. The irony of it was laughable considering how much I hated my own.

With a sigh, I started on the paper. The work didn't seem so hard once I'd gotten into a rythme. After a while my eyes started to hurt from staring at the screen for so long so I slipped on my glasses, hoping they would make it better. I'd only written 985 words which was barely a fifth of the required amount when my flow was interrupted.

To my annoyance Sam had managed to track down my refuge. He'd snuck in a piece of cake he'd bought from the Blitz and was trying to eat it discreetly, despite the signs clearly saying no food or drink were allowed.

"You should slow down." I looked away from my screen to see him inhaling chocolate.

"You don't say that when having sex."

It took me a second to figure out what he meant and when I did, I shook my head. "Have it your way."

"I will, thank you very much." He somehow mumbled through a mouth full of food. "Want some?"

"Why're you here, Sam?"

He ate the piece he had offered me and shrugged "Just needed to get away from home."

Now I felt awful. I reminded myself that it hadn't been long since his gran passed away. The little guy was brave enough coming back to school and I wasn't helping by being an asshole.

"Want to play?" I angled my screen towards him as a peace offering. He gladly accepted and I even let him win a few times.

"Is everything alright with you and Noah?"

"Why wouldn't they be?" I focused on the game.

"You guys seem. . ." He searched for the right word. "Tense. Did something happen when we were at his place?"

I was saved from having to answer by Phoenix's presence. I felt rather than heard her. She placed her hands on my shoulder, making me tense for a second before relaxing. Then she sat on the other side of me with a small smile.

"Hi."

"Hey." My voice lowered an octave.

Sam merely looked between us before his mouth settled into an 'O' shape. "Well, I guess I'll leave you two to it."

"Sam, you don't have to leave." Phoenix said.

"I do, actually. See you guys around."

We both watched as his back disappeared through the library doors. He hadn't even finished his cake.

"How's he handling things?"

"I have no idea." The guilt piled on. Recently I'd been more concerned about myself and my own situation to give much thought to others.

"You know, I've seen him hang out with Kat a lot."

"Good. He could use a proper friend."

"Are you mad at me?"

I sighed. "No."

She raised her brows. "You're annoyed because I told Jay." It wasn't a question.

"There's just no need to bring more people into this mess."

"I told him because I needed someone to make sure you didn't kill Zach for what he did."

"Trust me, I came very close." I said darkly.

"And that's exactly why Jay was needed." She placed a hand on my arm. "You can trust him."

I wanted to tell her that trust didn't come so easily to me. Even having this conversation with her was a huge step for me. Instead I said, "Can we talk about something else?"

She bit her lip in thought. I hadn't noticed how close we'd shifted to each other. Her phone buzzed but she ignored it and tapped my wrist. "Or we can get of here."

-

We went to my place. There was the usual mess, mostly clothes and pizza boxes strewn here and there - which I'd pinned down due to my laziness - but there was one thing, one someone that was right in all the clutter.

Ever since Sam's grandma's service, a closeness had grown about between Phoenix and I. In more ways than one. The door hadn't even fully closed before she pulled me down by my collar and we became lip-locked. She was in control and she made sure of that. She teased my lips apart and explored my mouth making my response twice fold. My fingers snaked through her hair, brushing something rough.

I pulled back. "You're hurt."

"It's nothing."

I dodged her kiss to my jaw. "It's not nothing. How did this happen?"

"So you can act like the mysterious guy but I can't keep a few secrets?"

"Phoenix." I frowned. "It's not like that."

I knew there was so much I wasn't telling her but then why should I? I didn't think of what we were doing than a temporary fling but then again me questioning her injury said otherwise. I tried to dampen the fuse that was lit at the thought of someone harming her but to little avail.

"Who did it?"

She sighed. "No one. I was riding my bike and got run off the road and hit my head."

"Who ran you off?" I wondered if Dante would think about targeting Phoenix. He probably would. But I wasn't quite ready to let go yet. The company was enjoyable.

"Some idiots. I didn't get a good look at their faces." Then with a sly smile, "It's nice that you show you care. It shows you're not as tough as you make out to be."

I was stunned for a moment before quickly collecting my cool. "Thanks for the compliment." I thought it was at least.

"Nice save."

Her phone buzzed again. At signs of her ignoring it I reached into her back pocket and pulled it out.

"Hey!" She tried to make a grab for it but I held it out of her reach and accepted the call before pressing it to her ear. She glared at me but grudgingly walked a few metres away.

While she made the call, I busied myself by making sandwiches. There wasn't much left, just some cheese and a whole lettuce that Elsa had forced me to buy.

"Who was it?" I asked when she returned. She waved her hand dismissively. I decided to let her keep this secret. After all, I had many of my own.

"Your ceiling's falling." She assessed, eyes skyward as she slipped onto a stool.

"Blame my crappy landlord."

"I've never met your landlord."

"Stay here long enough and you will." I slid her a sandwich coming close enough so I was positioned between her thighs. "It's more lettuce than anything."

But her attention wasn't on the sandwich. Her thumb brushed my cheek. Then my eyes, slowly travelling down to the bridge of my nose, my jaw and finally my lips. "You're such are such a tease." I grinned, unable to help myself.

"If it makes you smile then I'm happy to be one."

And she was right. I'd felt more lighter with her around. Momentarily forgetting about the crappier parts of life. For the time being, I was content with these small kisses and moments. I just wished it would stay that way.

Neither of us knew what this was but there was an unspoken agreement that we both enjoyed each others company. To prolong the moment, I tugged her to the living room. We watched tv for a while in silence. We hadn't been together for very long, but already these mundane acts felt so natural. I bit my lip to remind myself that this couldn't be something beyond temporary. But a bigger voice shut these thoughts down.

Losing interest in the tv screen, I traced her tattoo lightly; vines tangled around the key, one of which branched out and fell into the hollow of her collarbone. "Why did you choose this design?"

"I told my shrink it was because it was pretty." She smiled wryly.

"You don't strike me as the type to do this kind of thing for shallow reasons."

"Have me all sorted do you?" She elbowed me jokingly, other hand fiddling with her necklace which also had a key on it. "I guess a key signifies change. Opening new doors."

"And the vines?"

"Nobody said moving on was going to be easy." She frowned. "I got it after Matt died. It didn't feel real at the time. You know, him not being there anymore. Getting the tattoo wasn't just some act of rebellion. I wanted to feel something." On an afterthought she added, "And it was pretty."

"How long did it take?"

"A couple of hours."

"Did you go alone?"

"There wasn't anyone left by then." She said quietly and then in her normal voice, "Mom hated it. I was grounded for a month but I guess she came around eventually."

I closed the small gap between us and rested my forehead against hers. "It is a nice design." I said. "Especially on a neck like yours."

"Okay, I told you something about me. Your turn." She murmured as I made a trail of kisses up her neck to her jaw.

"There's not much to say."

"Why am I not convinced?" She rose a brow at my blatant lie.

I gave a wry smile and closed the gap between us. I wanted to forget about Zach, Dante, the fake article and just be blissful in the moment. I wondered what it was I was doing. A bubble had formed around us and I didn't want it to pop just yet.

A thought crossed my mind. Both equally terryfying and exhilarating: Maybe I was falling for the girl before me.