TWENTY SIX

"CAN YOU KINDLY check the reservations under Mr Raymond?" Theodore asked in his businessman tone.

The receptionist gave a curt nod and started typing on his computer.

"Excuse me. Do you guys have a spare room?" I queried, placing my fists on the wooden table. I don't want to live under the same roof as Theodore. As simple as that.

"Extremely sorry Ma'am. But all the rooms are booked because it's the holiday season. If you want I can look for a spare room in nearby hotels." He politely said.

"Yeah? That'll be-" I began to be cut off.

"No need for that, we'll ask our friends to manage and sort it out themselves. Keys?" Theodore interrupted, drumming his fingers on the counter right next to me, impatiently.

"Yes, sir. Here are the keys." He handed over them to Theodore. "We hope you have a wonderful honeymoon. Thanks for choosing Zurich Delight Hotel."

We walked silently through the corridors of the brightly lit hotel. Entering the elevator, Theodore tapped the button for the sixth floor. I looked down to find his other hand fisted. I daren't look at his face. I kept my posture erect and jutted out my chin.

I don't have anything to lose. Everything was lost the second I decided to marry this devil.

He slipped the card into the key holder and the dark room occupied its colour. I entered first. The living room was normal with a Mahogany couch and coffee table, all neat and clean. At the right was the kitchen counter with marble slates and microwave. And in front was a closed door I believed was the bedroom.

The door closed with a loud band and I whipped around with inflated eyes. In a blink, he pulled me but my elbow and I went crashing straight onto him. His body heat lightning my insides, the feel rattling my bones and exciting the veins.

I pulled up my eyes to find his cruel gaze on my face, which I felt was shrinking under his eyes.

"Why did you ask for a spare room? You know!" He paused when his voice blared suddenly and I tried to pull myself back. Key word being tried, because I found no success due to his iron clasp on my arm.

"You know how influential businessman I am. And if the media gets a clue that on the next day of the wedding the bride is asking for a different room... You know what impression will be set on the people?" He shook me, demanding for answers and I felt the pain surging up my broken arm. Just above his hold was where I was injected with anesthesia.

"Leave me." I tried to say as calmly as possible, not losing the fierce battle of.eye contact.

He gripped my hand tighter and against my will, I winced. "I said. Leave. Me."

When he didn't bulge, I howled myself from his grip, applying all the force I could. I stumbled back a few steps before regaining my footing. Pants were coming as intervals from my mouth.

I ran my fingers over the skin, which was now adorned with red fingerprints.

"Why do you have a bandage wrapped?" He asked out of a sudden.

"It's none of your business." I spat and strode into the bedroom. The footsteps following me closely made my shoulders tense.

"No, tell me. What is it... " He stepped in front of me, blocking my way. He took my hand carefully and a ghost of a feeling engulfed my heart. Maybe he felt bad for hurting me.

"Does it hurt?" His fingers ran over the white gauze, gently. In a flash, he twisted the wrist behind me and pulled me flush against him.

"Ahh.. " I yelped when the sudden pain marched down and pain spread its way. The area started throbbing after a second, when consciousness replaced my daze.

"Or are you acting to gain my sympathy?" He dared to say. His face so close to mine that his featurs were blurred to me. But the menacing look in his eyes made me realize that a moist layer covered my eyes. I blinked twice, not bothering to wipe them away. I wasn't a coward, I wasn't afraid to show my pain. But I no longer feel it...

I kept my quivering lips sealed, not wanting to explain myself to me. But I couldn't control it anymore. "You are hurting me." I blurted on his face.

In turn, he pressed my hand harder against my back and I knew the stitches had loosened or even worse broken. Damn! Unexpectedly, a little gasp escaped my lips in spite of my strong determination to not show my unguarded and weak side to him.

Not that he hasn't seen it...

"You're just hurt, not dead. Yet. So tell me..."

"You. Are. No. One. To me. I don't think that you owe any fucking explanation from me. And if you are done feeling me up like a gentleman then I suggest you let me go." I spoke with tears blurring my eyes but my voice, it didn't waver even a little bit. It came out the way I wanted it to be calm yet dangerously seething which didn't give a clue of the internal battle I was fighting to pretend strong against the self which wanted to collapse. My eyes challenged his character, taunting and defying it.

I AM NOT WEAK. CRYING DOESN'T MAKE YOU WEAK. YOU ARE HUMAN. YOU CAN CHOOSE TO BE THE WAY YOU FUCKING WANT TO BE.

He pulled away abruptly and I stood still, looking at him. Just for a second I felt as if a wave of shame swept his countenance but I must be wrong, for it disappeared as soon as it came, like a dream.

He, without any other expressions, dashed into the joint ensuite bathroom. I sighed when the door locked with a 'tick'.

I searched around the room for a first aid kit. Finally, finding it in the kitchen after twenty minutes of search, I went back to my room.

Unwrapping the red gauze carefully, I cleaned it with alcohol. Immediate stringing made me hiss a series of profanities in agony. I blike back the painful tears. The ache felt unbearable and I kept consoling myself that it would be over in just a few seconds.

'I know it will be hard but I hope you make it out alive.' his father's words echoed in my head and started making sense.

The bathroom door opened but I didn't spare my gaze to that side. It didn't matter to me. Nothing mattered to me anymore. I need not hide anything nor was I playing the pity card. He stood there for two seconds and I could feel his gaze concentrated on my wound, before he vanished into the wardrobe.

I scarfed a new gauze and tied a knot in the end with much difficulty because I just had one hand spare. Placing all the materials back into the kit I put it on the side table and curled on the bed in a ball, bringing my knees up and hiding my face.

The pillow made me feel comfortable immediately and my sore back took a few seconds to adjust. I just laid there, staring at the wall in front of me. There was so much running in my head that I didn't know what to think any more.

The heavy footsteps marched out of the wardrobe door. I felt that behind my back but I stayed still. Not having energy to even look over and honestly, I didn't want to. I felt so weak and tired and worn out. I wanted to cry.

"Listen to me, it doesn't matter if you are living or dead. I won't repeat. For you this is a vacation. Do whatever you want to but don't cross my path." Something flew in front of me, a card.

"There are the cards. Do shopping or whatever you wish for but stay away from me."

There was no shuffling from his side and my breath was held. After a moment, he walked out of the room and it closed lightly behind. I heaved a sigh. I pushed away the credit card with my finger and it slipped into the ground. The staring competition at the wall continued. The intensity stinged the back of my eye and a lone tear rolled down, fading into the pillow.

I am not a beggar. I have enough money to survive. I'd die but not accept anything from him anymore. I was so done with him that I felt frustrated till my core. Moreover I broke an FD to enjoy this holiday.

There was a dairy on the other side table and a Parker pen. I pulled it and wrote a line on the first page.

'You were so brave and quiet that I forget that you are suffering...'

That line was dedicated to my heart from my brain. I hope whoever finds it, gets hope and he realizes that life wouldn't be easy but we were going to make it worthwhile.

I needed someone to tell me that right now. But, the world forgets that people who pretend to be strong also need a helping hand.

To get rid of all the foul emotions, I decided to bath and sleep on a good note and not with tears. Last night was the last time I slept with tears and not satisfaction. I won't let it happen ever again. It was my life, I have to nourish it.

I'd be strong, I won't break.

***

The first thing you need to know about me is that I am not you.

A lot will start making sense after that.

***