FORTY-ONE: FIGHTS & MUCH MORE

"We need to talk," he said as we exited the car.

I scoffed, "Figured that already." 

"Stop throwing snarky comments like that." 

"Gosh, I never thought that I'd have to ask you about how I should speak." My bitch mode was on and I wasn't holding myself back.

He grunted behind me as I walked up the stairs to our room with him following me closely. Things were going to be bad, I had a strong feeling but I was breathing and would not back off.

I opened an earring halfway when he interrupted, "You were wrong." The thing that pissed me off was that he wasn't asking but stating. As if he knew everything in the world and my opinion or thinking didn't matter. Asshole.

"Of course. I was wrong. What's the next assumption you have for me, Mr. Raymond?" I smiled crookedly, shifting all my attention to him while the pointed end of the earring dug into my palm.

"He said what everyone thinks! Girl racers are taken to be sluts. You're an exception but that will not change people's thinking."  He tried making me understand but I knew he was losing it at my witty throwbacks. But I wasn't going to hold myself back. I couldn't.

"Are you sure that I'm not a slut? I suggest you reconsider. Because that's what you were implying when you abused me in the middle of the road!" I screamed, losing my senses and throwing the earring in a random direction. It's landing made a slight noise but the voice was ignored in the thick air. It felt like a high chunk of energy was sucked out of me leaving me dizzy. 

He breathed deeply with closed eyes while I was fuming. He took a step forward and I held up my hand warning him with a stern gaze to be where he was.

"Okay, you're right. He was wrong. But you can't talk to such an old man in that tone. You created a scene in front of so many people. They were whispering so bad things -"

"You really care about what people were whispering? Didn't you feel the slightest pang in your chest- " I emphasized by bringing my thumb and pointer finger close to each other before poking my chest with the pointer finger, "- when his son was practically eye raping me or when they just-" I grasped which resulted in a sob breaking in the thick air. 

I didn't realize I had started crying till then and my heart carved inside when he looked at me as if he didn't know what was going on. So much was happening, I was hurting deep within, the surroundings were hazy, my head was throbbing and he felt...nothing?

I hiccuped before forcing out my voice, "-they judged me, your wife, in front of you. You're pathetic. Self-obsessed, conceited, foolish man." I threw the earnings in my hard to same distant corner. If they made a noise which indicated that they broke, I didn't hear it above the rate at which my own heart was scattering. My heart broke when he looked down guiltily, helplessly and I continued sniffling in the concentrated atmosphere filled with tension.

 A screeching voice followed as I pulled at my hair while I felt the room revolve. Sweat was gathering on my forehead and the stupid bun was making my hair itch. I pulled the pins out harshly, mourning at the pain but the sobs didn't seize. 

"Lia," he croaked out and I pulled myself back when he tried to hold me. Regret and shame contoured his face but I wasn't sure because everything was blurred with the tears. 

 "No," I sobbed more, covering my face with my hands but he pulled me towards him anyways, using the strength of his muscles but it was comforting and there went my resistance. My defense was weak and not totally determined because I was yearning to have his touch on my body yet I was pulling away because I was… hurt.

And I hate fighting with my own self and it was happening because of him. He was the culprit … but the victim was me. I was suffering. And he was clueless.

He gathered me in his embrace and rested his chin on my forehead despite my repeated struggle. I jerked back with all the force I could muster and began shouting, "You are a monster, you know that! The worst person on this freaking world-"

It happened so quickly yet in slow motion which as enough to take my breath away. He drew me into him, his head dipped to capture my lips. 

Time froze and the world stopped rotating. Everything started fading and my eyes gave in. Closing my eyes, a few tears rolled down leaving behind a burn of rawness on their tracks. 

Anger brewed furiously inside me when realization dawned to me that he kissed me to shut my mouth. 

First thing, how dare he kiss me?

A few more tears rolled down as I pushed him aggressively to the nearest wall while moving my lips against him. This action was weirdly natural and it angered me more. My lips worked furiously against him, sucking and nibbling his bottom lip then capturing the other. His desperate hands moved to hold me by my waist, to stabilize us. He was struggling to let go and hold on to his patience. I tortured him more to frustrate him and that quenched my anger.

 I wanted things to break and fall apart the way I did, so I continued assaulting his lips with mine. My fingers found his neck as I let out my frustration by clawing my nails into his flesh. Everything was overdose in this kiss. More anger, more frustration, more longingness, more aggression and more remorse.

The kiss broke for a second and before I could blink an eye, he hauled me up in the air. A high pitched hitch escaped my mouth which I couldn't even believe came from within. My legs tangled around his waist helplessly, with much difficulty due to my dress to hold onto my dear life. But the slit alongside was a blessing. 

My lips were pulled into his and my back was slammed against the same wall I was holding Theodore captive just a few seconds back. I don't know which occurred before or why I didn't feel any pain but the pace of our kisses reduced. An inexpressible pain shot through my stomach at the tenderness and passion he initialized.  His hand cupped my jaw firmly but it wasn't painful rather a light caress. 

A strong wave of heat engulfed us as nothing else in the world seemed to matter. Actually, I almost forgot about the world and I won't be surprised if I had forgotten my name too. I don't know and neither did I care right now. I wanted more and more. 

He deepened the kiss and his one hand secured me against him while the other weaved through my hair, gently easing out the knots.  An unbearable gratification seeped into me and I leaned into his touch when his hand threaded into my hair from the underside and he began patterning undesirable figures. My hunger couldn't be satisfied and I wasn't going to settle for less.

When did he manage to pull out my pins?

His warm tongue ran across the seam of my lips but I pressed them together unknowingly. Maybe I wasn't sure yet. His attention shifted to leave open-mouthed pecks around the corners of my lip, descending further down to my jaw. 

My senses were overwhelmed when he didn't force himself to delve into my mouth when I resisted it. He was painfully patient and sane; and my chest caved in at his delicacy. His hands were frantic and powerful, grabbing me close to him or even tugging at my hair but his lips, they were calm and respectful. 

Overwhelmness surged through my nerves from all over the body before they ran as a strong current up my spine filling me with boldness. I pulled his face up and dipped my tongue without wasting a second. He was surely taken off guard as his actions ceased and his grip loosened. But it didn't last very long and I certainly wasn't complaining.

He pushed us further into the wall, his hands dragging up and down my back at a heavy pace. I let myself loose as our tongues reigned to electrify our cells. They weren't fighting for dominance or claim, no they were playing, exploring, and pleasuring.  It was like our own language was built as we were sharing so many unspoken verses and promises for life. 

I realized how he wasn't a dominant and aggressive individual but a compassionate and understanding one. He'd let me work myself against him while he'd support and encourage me by holding me to him protectively. There was more I unrevealed about me, him, and our relationship.

I started unbuttoning his shirt, searching for life. Everything was still and I wondered if I was dreaming or imagining. My thoughts were defied when my palm found his throbbing heart and I exhaled in relief. I realized that even if the world ends, we'd still be exactly where we were, untouched and protected. This was real, we were real. The butterflies in my tummy were real. This kiss was real. 

The air changed and I found myself dropped lightly over the familiar scented mattress making our kiss break. It wasn't even a full second before his warm hand crawled up through the slit of my dress up to my thighs and his mouth met me again. He firmly squeezed my thigh before his thumb came up to hold me by my jaw, his fingers molding onto my scalp. 

My hands messed his hair before unbuttoning the remaining buttons. His nerves bundled against my plan and I ran my hands up and down his torso to bring them to ease. His lips began teasing my cheeks with his light stubble, leaving back wet kisses on my cheek, under the jaw bone upto under my earlobe. The pleasurable pain exploded and I pushed him down, getting over him in a swift motion to straddle him. 

I claimed his lips again, moving them to an unknown, deep seated tune within us.  My fingers grazed his chest muscles, defined abdomen muscles and ripples. They found their way to the metallic buckle, pulling at them. Theodore tensed and a different wave passed over us but I didn't stop my movements. 

"Stop," he whispered against my lips, in between the kisses. His voice came out hoarse then usual. I leaned back slightly to find his eyes. 

"Stop?" I repeated breathlessly. It took me a second to open my eyes and when I did, I found his hooded eyes looking back at me. Our chests we're brushing against each other.

It was like I forgot what the word 'stop' meant before realization struck me like a thundering bolt. I sat back up with him under me and panted. He pulled up his head a bit to spare me a glance before throwing it back into the mattress. He sighed visibly trying to regain his breath and ran his fingers through his hair. I watched him while panting profusely.

Air of embarrassment and shame suffocated me and I peeled myself away from that position at that very instant. 

His head bolted up at the shuffling sounds and I bunched my dress into my fist before storming out of the room with teary eyes. I didn't know where I was heading to, till I found the familiar door of my room. 

In a rush, I pushed it open. Running straight into my bathroom, I swayed down against the door.

'His lips were puffed and busted'. Was what I thought.

***

I could write a poem
On your neck
With my kisses.

***

How was it?

Don't you dare walk away without leaving back your thoughts in comments. 

This chapter was ready a long while back but I continued revising it over a million times because I wasn't sure.

I hope it was worth the wait?