So um.

Hi.

I have some questions for you, if you don't mind.

I, well...

Why are you leaving? I feel like everyone is leaving me.

It was all good in the first start, but now, it feels like I'm losing everyone. I lost so many friends on here, and I don't talk to them anymore.

I'm not holding a grudge on anyone, but just...Why?

Why are you leaving?

I feel as if everything was good in the start, but was it really not?

What did I do? Did I scare you? Was I too mean? Why are you not speaking to me?

I look and see all the notifications I get, and they're all from a story I wrote like the zodiac signs one or something.

Or if it's not, it's from conversations were people don't acknowledge my existence.

I had a good things running, but now, with so many people leaving or threatening to leave, I don't know anymore.

It feels like I lost so much, but in reality, they are still there, but not with me.

I'm a shadow, I guess.

I'm a girl in this everlasting darkness, trying to reach the light.

I'm going to admit...

I'm cruel in real life. I sass on people, and truly I have the worst temper in the world.

I don't know why I have so many friends who actually, care about me.

I'm technically known as the depressing girl in the school, who cuts her hand with scissors, who is weird, who is tall.

I have no reason to fit in anymore.

I don't know where I'm going with this, I honestly don't.

Care or not care, that's up to you.

I'm not placing any pity on myself, nor should you do that to me. I don't deserve pity. What I do deserve, is a slap across the face, or a punch in the shoulder or ribs.

Yes, I guess I've had so much pain in my life that I don't see the meaning of living anymore... haha...

Honestly, the only thing that is keeping me from dying, is because my friends lost her cat a few days ago, and my mom lost her son, which would have been my oldest brother, and everyone is losing something.

I don't want to put more depression to that. I don't want to live, but I don't want to die.

It's scary, to say the lease. I'm scared of death. But it sounds peaceful, as people put it.

If I could sacrifice myself, I would, to protect the others around me. So, I don't know if this is important or not, because who gives a damn anymore?

I sure don't. I don't care.

I might leave Wattpad, or maybe just be on hiatus for a while. I don't know though. I never know.