I'm going to be a buzzkill and break the chain -- I don't have the bandwidth to write 13 good questions for others. But I will answer the ones that Red_Harvey asked me.

1. Share a quote that sums you up.

"INCOMPREHENSIBLE!" -- my wife, after reading the first story I ever got published

2. Who's your favorite literary character?

After not very much thought, I'm going to go with Vlad Taltos from Steven Brust's Dragaera books. Snarky, flawed, capable, painted with a full range of emotions. 

3. Who do you look up to and why?

Hmm. My brother and sister-in-law, for raising a family that's larger than mine with what appears to be considerably less emotional angst. My parents, same reason. My academic advisors, for being smart and awesome. Any writer who's written a book I liked even a little bit. Anyone who makes a living working two jobs, or working with their hands.

4. How many days have you gone without showering?

Probably my record was 3 or 4, when I was 17 and out on a camping trip in the Pine Barrens. 

5. Which presidential candidate are you voting for and why?

My overall view is, I'll vote for Hillary, but I'll campaign for Bernie. Which is to say: I am extremely risk-averse when it comes to consolidating Obama's hard-fought progress. So I'd sooner nominate Hillary. But if Bernie is nominated, I will pitch in to help him get elected... because I'll be excited, and because I think he'll need it.

6. Do you believe in an afterlife?

No.

7. Favorite sci-fi movie and why.

Maybe I could think of a better one with time, but honestly? SERENITY. I saw it without having watched FIREFLY and was still totally engaged, totally on board, totally crying in my beer for Wash afterward. And the thing is totally re-watchable, which is not something I say often.

8. Batman or Superman? Why?

Superman. Illegal immigrant makes good.

9. Apple or Android? Why?

Apple. My old Android phone had no podcast app and was full of crapware, so I switched to Apple. I liked my iPhone, so I didn't switch back. I'm sure Android phones (and iPhones) are much better now than they were in 2011, but I don't feel like switching again.

10. How many people do you fall in love with every day?

I suppose this is inviting a poetic answer, but really? 0. I love my family; I love my close friends; it takes a *lot* to get into either of those circles.

11. Describe your favorite place.

A little beach community in Michigan City, Indiana, one street and a boardwalk away from the lake. My wife and I have visited a college friend and her family there for... 14 summers, now? Old friends, pastel houses, farmer's market croissants, calm water that doesn't fill your mouth with salt. 

12. If I gave you $10 to buy chocolate milk, and it only cost $3, would you bring me all the change or would you tell me it was actually $10? Because I'll know. I'll know chocolate milk doesn't cost that much.

I'd probably turn down the money, since I live in a different state. Would that be OK? I mean, if it's going to cause a serious problem, I'll find some person near you and just transfer them the money. Then, if you don't get the change, it's your own damn fault for asking someone in New Jersey to bring you chocolate milk. You're not going to make a big thing out of this, right? I have a family, I can't just go driving chocolate milk all over the place, especially if you won't let me keep the change.

13. Finally, what do you think cats dream about?

Fact: Cats dream about a future in which they evolved to dominate the planet and humans were their slaves and prey. (For reference, please see Neil Gaiman's widely cited graphic history, "Dream of a Thousand Cats.")