Hey guys!

Sorry for the tremendously long wait, but this took FOREVER to write oh my fucking goodnessssssss. I had to keep making sure it aligned with part 1 and then also had to show character development and it's been two months since I started this because I really wanted it to be good. I really really hope you enjoy this! It's more than 10k words which is actually kind of crazy lol so I might end up splitting it into more than 2 parts.

There's brief mentions of suicide in the beginning and then it should be fine from there.

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"Jeongguk get up."

Jeongguk remains motionless.

"Jeongguk? Get up." Hoseok says, mildly concerned. He walks over to Jeongguk's bed and gives him a gentle poke.

Jeongguk still doesn't move.

"Jeongguk!?" Hoseok calls again, panicked. His heart is beating rapidly as he frantically shakes Jeongguk once again, rolling him over and physically sagging with relief when he sees Jeongguk's face, alive and breathing. There are tears in his bleary red eyes as he stares back at Hoseok.

"I'm not fucking dead, so you can leave me alone now." Jeongguk mumbles bitterly. "I know Jimin only sent you to make sure I didn't try to kill myself again. Leave the keys under the mat when you go."

Hoseok frowns at his friend.

"Well good morning to you too. For the record, Jimin did not send me; I came of my own accord, you know, because we're friends??" Hoseok says. "And can you blame him anyway? You may be a pain in the arse but we still would prefer you to not be dead."

"Whatever."

"How was your sleep?"

"I slept for 2 hours and dreamt of Tae. And then thought about him for the 6 hours I was awake for."

"2 hours is better than no hours." Hobi says, "And I'm sure you'll think of him less as the days go on and you learn to get over him, so don't feel too bad."

"I appreciate the sentiment, but I'm not in the mood. I don't even wanna exist today, let alone tackle my problems." Jeongguk pulls the blanket over his head and curls back into himself, blocking out Hobi and the world.

"Well, you have to tackle them before they take you out completely." Hoseok says wisely, pulling the blanket back. "Even if it's one thing at a time." He looks over beside Jeongguk's head where his phone is resting on his pillow. He reaches over to grab it before Jeongguk can and he sighs in disappointment when he looks at the screen.

"Jeongguk, didn't we agree that you'd change your lockscreen months ago?" He says gently. It's a picture of Taehyung in a red dress, eyes scrunched and lips wide in a pleased grin as he poses shyly for the camera.

Hoseok remembers that day vividly - Taehyung and Jeongguk had hosted a garden party as a housewarming celebration, shortly after they'd moved in together, and Jeongguk had been so blatantly enamoured with Kim the entire night that nobody even had the heart to poke fun at him for it.

He remembers feeling proud of his best friend for being able to find his dream home and doing it all with someone who completed him so dearly.

Hoseok turns the screen off.

"I know, but I just...can't." Jeongguk frowns sadly.

"We changed it together, remember? To that picture of us at the seaside so you could look at people who actually care about you. When did you change it back?"

"I don't even remember." Jeongguk says, "I just...can't help it, you know? I looked at it every day for years, and I can't help but...miss him." He sits up and takes his phone back from Hobi, unlocking it and shoving it back in his face.

"Look." he says, "Look at how unhappy he is here."

It's a picture on Taehyung's instagram, his most recent post. He's standing in front of a golden statue of an elephant, holding a rose in one hand and making a peace sign with his other hand. His hair is permed and coloured a shade of light brown and it sits on his head like a little cloud.

"I dunno man, he looks happy enough to me." Hoseok says in confusion.

"He's not. His smile doesn't reach his eyes like it usually does. They don't shine or sparkle anymore in any of his posts. He's not happy with Minho, I just know it."

"I thought we also agreed you'd block Taehyung's instagram account too."

"Yeah, but I have to know if he's eating well, or if he's changed his hair, because he loves doing that, you know he-"

"Guk." Hoseok interrupts sternly.

"Sorry. I just...worry about him."

"It's not your job to worry about him anymore. Leave that to his actual boyfriend."

Jeongguk winces.

"I know it's hard to accept, but Taehyung's moved on, so you should try to too."

"I-"

"I get it, I do. But it's only going to make you miss him worse if you don't start to let go of some of the memories. It' s been a year; you need to live life for yourself and not for Taehyung."

"Well there's no point living if Taehyung's not here anyways." Jeongguk mutters.

"I know it's hard, but a life without him definitely exists. You just gotta find the will to find it."

"I don't even remember what life without him was like, so what's the point?"

"Jeongguk-"

"You know I spent 6 years of my life with him and he probably didn't even love me for any of it? How do I live with that knowledge? He's the only guy I've ever loved." Jeongguk says as he stares up at the ceiling, tears welling in his eyes. "I'm so fucking pathetic. It's 9am in the morning and I'm crying for the third time today." He laughs darkly.

"It's not pathetic - it's human."

"Same thing, is it not?"

"Jeongguk." Hobi says gently, "Having negative emotions is okay, but letting them overwhelm you and dictate your life is where the problem arises."

"You sound like Taehyung." Jeongguk sniffles sadly, "He was always telling me to find more ways to deal with sadness. Usually, I'd just cuddle him til the sadness went away."

"But you can't do that anymore."

"I know. But I don't know what to do instead. The sadness just won't go away."

"Then take it away. Don't wait for the sadness to get worse before you do something about it."

"What do I do?" Jeongguk asks quietly, "I'm scared I'm going to waste my life away but I don't know how to make it better."

"The hardest thing you can do; You talk about it. Find people who actually care about you and want to be in your life, and stop focusing on those who have clearly shown you they don't want to be around." Hoseok says firmly. "I know it's not easy, but I can't help you heal if you don't want to let me help. You need to tell me what's going on."

So Jeongguk takes a deep breath, wiping his eyes on the back of his hand and heaving a shaky sigh, before he opens his mouth and slowly begins to tell his friend everything that's been weighing on his
mind for the past year.

●

"Babe, hurry up; we're going to be late!" Taehyung calls out to his boyfriend. "We said we'd be there by 7pm!"

Minho walks down the stairs and rolls his eyes as he sighs in annoyance.

"Leave me alone, god." He mutters.

"I thought you were getting ready?" Taehyung says, looking Minho up and down as he takes in his outfit.

"I am ready."

"Y-You can't wear that!" Taehyung complains, irritated. Minho is wearing a dirty pair of Nike tracksuit bottoms and a black t-shirt with the word Oppai written in bold letters on the front. A black Nike fanny pack sits at his waist and he's holding his crusted pair of TNs in his hand.

"Why not?"

"We're going to meet my parents - you can't wear a shirt that has the word boobs on it!"

"God, you're such a fucking dramatist. You're lucky I'm even going at all."

"Well you're not going like that. At least change your shirt."

"What's the point? I've already met them before."

"Yeah, but that's different. You met them as my friend in college. Now this time you're my boyfriend. You know they're not your biggest fan anyway, so at least try not to make them think even worse of you."

Minho rolls his eyes.

"I'm either going like this or I'm not going at all." Minho says, and Taehyung's hands ball into fists at his side. Tears of frustration sting at the corners of his eyes.

"Fine. Get in the fucking car." Taehyung seethes, slamming the door behind him as they leave the house.

When they arrive at Taehyung's parent's house, the atmosphere is tense and uncomfortable. Tae knows his parents were confused and disappointed at his sudden break up with Jeongguk, but to their credit, they haven't pushed the subject and have tried to be welcoming to Minho, accommodating him and including him in family activities as best they could.

The problem is, Minho is...well...Minho.

Taehyung's not sure how he managed to be completely oblivious to his best friend's overwhelmingly sleazy and abominable nature before, but now that they were dating, the red flags had popped out of every corner and it was blaringly obvious that thing were not going to work for much longer. He can't even stand to look him in the eye without being reminded of his pitiful mistake. It echoes in his head at every moment of silence.

I cheated.

I cheated.

I cheated.

It's around 9:30pm when Taehyung is sitting on the sofa in his parents living room, absentmindedly staring at the TV where some trashy reality tv show is playing. The people are screaming at a girl with pink hair who's cheated on her boyfriend, while he rips his mic off and walks away in tears. The other contestants berate her in their little interviews and the commentators call her shallow as she desperately tries to justify her actions while being voted off.

Taehyung changes the channel.

I cheated.

I cheated.

I cheated.

His parents enter the living room and sit down beside him. He can tell by the look in his dad's eyes that he can't avoid telling them the truth forever, and he mutes the TV to give them his attention.

"Taehyung," His dad begins slowly, "What's going on?"

Taehyung smiles bitterly.

"Way to beat around the bush." He says sarcastically.

"There's hardly any bush to beat around." His mother says, exasperated, "You randomly stopped seeing Jeonggukie and replaced him with Minho of all people, and you know how we feel about him. Things between you and Jeonggukie were going so well. I-I just don't understand what went wrong, or why you stopped seeing each other after so many years."

"Clearly things weren't going as well as you thought." Taehyung mutters, fiddling with a cushion to avoid eye contact.

I cheated.

I cheated.

I cheated.

"Was it money?" Mrs Kim asks.

"No."

"His job?"

"No."

"The engagement? Did you not like it?"

"No - how did you even know he was going to propose?" Taehyung questions.

"He came and asked for our permission that year. He showed us the ring and was planning a surprise party for you too." his mother reminisces fondly.

"Well it wasn't the engagement because I never got engaged." Taehyung says quietly. "We had a fight the night he was going to propose, and that was the last I've seen of him. I'd be lying if I said it wasn't my fault."

"Did he hurt you?" Mr Kim asks cautiously.

Taehyung snaps his head up.

"What? No! Never." He responds defensively, "Jeongguk would never do such a thing."

"Well then what else are we supposed to believe, Taehyung?" Mr Kim sighs, "You won't tell us anything and his family want nothing to do with us anymore. We can't just sit here and watch you ruin your life with Minho and pretend everything is fine when it's not. We've given you a year of peace and you still won't budge. Frankly, I won't have it. Either you tell us what happened or you get out and never come back again." He says firmly.

"Dad!" Taehyung cries out in shock, eyes wide in disbelief as tears sting in the corner.

I cheated.

I cheated.

I cheated.

Mrs Kim places a hand on her husband's leg in an attempt to get him to calm down, but from the look in her eyes, Taehyung knows she's on his side too.

"Mum." He pleads, eyes shiny with pearly tears, but she shakes her head in response.

"Tae, you and Jeongguk dated for nearly a decade. You don't just spontaneously end things one night, on the verge of becoming engaged and expect nobody to worry about you. Your father and I just want to know what went wrong, okay? We just want to be able to support you and help you do what's best. How can we sit here and just let you throw your life away with that boy who doesn't care about you even a fraction of how much Jeongguk did? If you really can't tell us, then maybe it really is time for you to leave." She says solemnly.

Taehyung sits there, head hung low as tears drip from his eyes and stain the cushion on his lap. He sits there crying silently, while his parents watch him without saying a word. The shame and the guilt and fear wash over him again in a nauseating wave and he trembles violently as he opens his mouth to take shaky breaths.

I cheated.

I cheated.

"I cheated." He whispers almost silently, as though a louder volume would somehow make it more truthful.

It's the first time he's ever said it out loud and the words taste putrid on his tongue. The air in the room goes stale and he hears his mother gasp across from him.

"Y-You cheated?" she asks, "What do you mean you cheated? You cheated on Jeongguk?"

Taehyung doesn't have the strength to open his mouth again, so he nods forlornly as the tears keep falling.

"Why, Tae? Why on earth would you do that?"

"I-I don't know." Taehyung admits truthfully. "Minho was always telling me that he thought I was pretty and made advances at me, a-and one day I just gave in a-"

"You cheated with Minho?" His mother asks in disbelief, and Taehyung can hear the disappointment in her voice. He doesn't need to look up to know that his mother is crying, and it makes him feel like shit to know that it's all his fault.

"Taehyung, how could you do that to Jeongguk? After everything he did for you?"

Taehyung sits there and cries even harder.

"I-I don't know why I did it."

"Did you even love him at all?"

"He's the love of my life mum."

"Then why? For the life of me, I can't understand how you could betray him like that."

Taehyung remains silent.

"A-And you're still with Minho even though you cheated with him. How do you think that would make anyone feel?" His mother laments. She covers her mouth like she's going to be sick and abruptly gets up, leaving the room.

Taehyung sits there blankly, heart pounding violently in his chest. When he closes his eyes he can still hear Jeongguk's words ringing loudly in his ears:

"How could you do this to me?"

He looks up from his lap and sees his father looking at him with an unreadable expression on his face. His eyes are devoid of their usual warmth as he looks Taehyung directly in the eyes.

"You know I've never been one to comment on how other people live their lives." He says solemnly, "Even if I disagree, it's not my place to insert my opinion where it's not warranted. But Taehyung, I want you to know that I am very disappointed in you." Mr Kim says, watching as Taehyung sits there in tears.

"I d-don't know why I did it, Dad." Taehyung says, crying, "I really don't k-know why."

Mr Kim stands up slowly and begins to walk out of the room, after his wife. He stops, almost like an afterthought, and turns around to say more.

"It disturbs me to know that you're capable of doing something so...selfish to someone who'ddedicated a large part of his life to you. Taehyung he cared so much about you, it was borderline inspirational. We raised you better. In fact, you yourself know better. However you plan on getting through this situation, just know I don't think I can ever look at you the same way again." He puts his hand on Taehyung's face and uses it to wipe some tears from his son's eyes, patting him on the head once before exiting the room too, leaving Taehyung all by himself.

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Anyway bye
🙈