"Joon, I know I said I wanted a job, but this is not what I had in mind." Jeongguk groaned as he spoke to his best friend Kim Namjoon over the phone. "I mean, a ball boy? Seriously?"

"What's wrong with it?" Namjoon questioned.

"What isn't wrong with it?" Guk retorted despairingly. "For starters, that job is for literal children. I'm 21 years old. I haven't been a child in three years."

"Four." Namjoon corrected.

"What?"

"Four years Jeongguk. You haven't been a child in four years. If it were three years, then that would make you 18, but legally you're an adult at 18, so you were supposed to say four years."

"Fuck off. Literally don't even start with me today, Joon." Jeongguk bitched into the speaker.

"Sorry." Joon said insincerely. "Anyway, you were saying?"

"Right. I'm not a child anymore, so I can't take that job anyway."

"But I can get you in, so it doesn't matter that you're not a child. It's not some fancy Wimbledon tournament anyway, so I don't think your age is gonna be an issue; it's only a country club."

"Filled with rich, snobby pricks. Ugh, Joon. Maybe I'll just take a job at the local Iceland or something. Lord knows they never have any cashiers there anyway." Jeongguk sighed.

"You're so fucking stubborn." Namjoon said, and Jeongguk could hear the eyeroll through the speaker. "Just accept the fucking job."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"You have to."

"No, I don't."

"Ugh, Jeongguk. Yes you do. I didn't want to have to tell you this, but you literally broke the ball boy's leg, and none of the other candidates were even remotely qualified to fill in. You gotta make amends by taking this job."

"So? I don't care. That snot-nosed bastard deserved it anyway. I mean, who the fuck stands in the centre of the ring with some expensive mountain bike while someone's clearly aiming for a half-pipe? Go to the fucking country side if you want to ride a bike like that - not a skate park. Or at least bring a bmx instead! He had it coming. Stupid fucking Cornelius. How's he meant to see the ball and catch it if he can't even spot a fucking 6"2 guy on a skateboard coming right at him? If you ask me, he's not qualified for the fucking job either." Jeongguk muttered bitterly.

"Jeongguk he's 11."

"And apparently he's fucking blind too."

"Jeongguk." Namjoon said exasperatedly, "Give the poor kid a break. Just take the stupid job and fill in for him. The club gets a replacement while Cornelius heals, and you get paid too; it's a win-win all around. I just started working here and I really like this job and that girl I like is finally starting to give me the time of day. They put me in charge of finding a replacement and I really don't want to screw things up by not doing a good job, man. You'll be good at it; I know you will. It's only over the summer anyway. You'll be done with it all in 6 weeks and you can forget it ever happened. Please?"

"Fine." Jeongguk grumbled after a while, scowling like a petulant child. "I'll do it. But only for the money. After that, I want to forget that it ever happened."

"Thanks." Namjoon said gratefully. "Really Jeongguk, thank you."

"No worries, man. After your breakup with Seokjin, I don't want to ruin your chances out on the dating field again. I'll take the stupid job if it means that much to you." Jeongguk said.

"Except there's just one more thing." Namjoon admitted sheepishly.

"Dear god, what now?"

"You have to wear a uniform."

"Son of a bitch."

●

"These shorts are right up my bumhole." Jeongguk complained as he picked out his wedgie. "Did they really not have anything in a larger size?"

"Oh. They did. I just didn't get them for you." Namjoon smiled innocently.

"You motherfucker." Jeongguk said. "I look like Korean Andy Murray, I'm doing a job for 5-year-olds, and on top of that, I'm not even wearing shorts that bloody fucking fit."

"Your shirt looks a bit tight too. I could probably find you a better one."

"No. I like this one because it shows off my muscles." Jeongguk smirked, flexing his arms obnoxiously.

"Pretentious prick." Namjoon muttered.

"What was that?" Jeongguk questioned.

"I said you're a pretentious prick." Namjoon said boldly, "Do you need it in writing too?"

"Arsehole."

"At least mine doesn't have tennis shorts in it." Namjoon laughed, ducking to avoid the smack Jeongguk tried to deliver to his head.

"This is fucking stupid." Jeongguk groaned. "Why do we have to walk there? It's so far."

"Well, your car is in the mechanics, I only have one bike and you don't own a one at all. Plus, the last time I was on the bus, somebody vomited. Walking was our best bet."

"Didn't you buy that tandem bike?"

"I did, but Seokjin took it when we split up." Namjoon frowned. "Besides, there's no way in hell I'd ride a tandem bike with you."

"Why not? What's wrong with me?

"What isn't wrong with you?"

"You don't have to be mean."

"It's for couples, Jeongguk. I don't want to look like I'm in a relationship with you; that's so gay." Namjoon said.

"Says the man who just ended a 2-year relationship with another man."

"Says the man who sucked a guy's dick for a Magnum ice-cream." Namjoon retorted.

"Says the guy who ate out his boss for a promotion." Jeongguk said.

"Says the guy who wanked to a picture of Chris Hemsworth."

"Okay, who hasn't?" Jeongguk said defensively.

"And you're also the guy who arranges his dildoes in the colours of the rainbow." Namjoon pointed out too.

Jeongguk scowled and looked away.

"It looks pretty that way." He grumbled angrily.

"Face it Jeongguk, you are literally such a British cigarette." Namjoon smiled, watching as his best friend burst out into laughter, holding his sides and stumbling along the pavement as he laughed so hard, he began to hiccup.

"You're a stupid bitch anyway." Jeongguk laughed. "I don't want to ride a tandem bike with you either."

"Doesn't matter now, because we're here." Namjoon said, gesturing to the grandiloquent country club that stood majestically in front of them.

"Holy fucking moly."

"You can say that again."

"Holy fu-"

"Shut up." Namjoon rolled his eyes as he passed the guards and scanned his ID card, motioning for Jeongguk to follow him. They walked through several different lavish halls, with large glass windows displaying the beautiful grassy scenery outdoors too. Finally, they came to a halt at a large oak door that read HEADQUATERS in giant obnoxious gold letters.

"How much do you think I'd get if I sold one of those?" Jeongguk mumbled to Namjoon under his breath, and his best friend glared at him like a Nigerian parent when their child misbehaves in public.

"Do not embarrass me, Jeongguk. Otherwise, your tandem dreams are over."

Jeongguk nodded feebly and stopped messing about; angry Namjoon was not a force to be reckoned with.

Kim knocked twice on the door before entering, Jeongguk in tow behind him.

"Good afternoon, Mr Jung." Namjoon said to the man sitting at the giant desk in the centre of the room.

"Good afternoon too, Kim." Mr Jung smiled.

"What can I do for you?"

"I have the replacement ball boy here." Namjoon explained, gesturing to Jeongguk who waved sheepishly.

"Um. Hi. My name is Jeon Jeongguk." He said awkwardly.

Dear god kill me now he thought in shame.

Mr Jung narrowed his eyes and looked at both boys sceptically.

"He doesn't look like he's 11 years old." He observed.

"Um. I'm um, 21." Jeongguk stuttered.

"None of the other candidates were qualified for the position." Namjoon said, "Jeongguk was a solid and skilled replacement and I was hoping that his age would be overlooked while he fills in for Cornelius over the summer."

Mr Jung was silent, before nodding once.

"Very well then. I'll take your word for it. But any mishaps or inappropriate actions on club grounds will be punishable by firing. Understood?"

"Yes." Jeongguk and Namjoon replied.

"Good." Mr Jung said. "Now Namjoon, you get to your post and continue your schedule as normal. I shall escort Mr Jeon around and show him his posts too. Thank you very much."

Namjoon smiled and bowed, meeting Jeongguk's eyes with a pleading expression that said please don't screw this up for me before turning around and leaving.

"Come along then, Jeongguk. Let me show you around."

●

"And finally, the tennis courts." Mr Jung concluded, gesticulating widely to the various courts and ongoing matches in front of Jeongguk. "You'll be stationed in the court in the far right, and you'll be assigned to the club owner's son."

"Wow." Jeongguk said.

"I know; it's a big responsibility." Mr Jung sympathised, "But Cornelius isn't here and that was his assignment too, so we have to give it to you. He's not the most amicable person ever, so just be warned that there probably won't be much friendship between you two. He's quite an intimidating person to be around. Nonetheless, I trust that your assistance to him will be satisfactory, yes?"

"Err, yes. Very stationary." Jeongguk said, watching as Mr Jung laughed at him a bit. They walked over to the court, and Jeongguk was led over to a tall man around his age with floppy brown hair and a white headband pushing back his fringe, exposing his dark, brooding eyebrows. He was rallying with the person opposite him, and their rhythm was fast paced and intense.

"Kim! Come here." Mr Jung called, startling the boy and making him miss the return, causing him to curse loudly. Abruptly, he turned to face them, clearly irritated at having been disturbed during practice. He violently threw his racket onto the floor and stormed over, seething with passionate rage.

"What." he barked aggressively.

"Jeongguk, this is Taehyung. Taehyung, this is Jeongguk." Mr Jung informed.

"So what?" Tae snapped.

"He's going to be your ball boy replacement."

"Where's Cornelius?"

"Injured. I don't really know why." Mr Jung mused, and Jeongguk looked away guiltily.

"Why is this guy the replacement? He looks too old."

"I'm not old." Jeongguk protested. "I'm only 21."

"Yikes."

"Taehyung don't be rude." Mr Jung chastised.

"Hoseok, I'm not going to have this guy be my ball boy. I mean, what if he needs a hip replacement or something?"

"I don't need a hip replacement!" Jeongguk said in offence. "I'm virtually a stallion."

"What happened to all the other children?"

"Underqualified." Hoseok said, "Jeongguk here was the best we could do."

"Why do you say that like it's a bad thing?" Jeongguk whined, but nobody was listening to him.

"Seriously? Nobody else? He sticks out from the other ball boys like a sore thumb. Is he even going to be allowed to assist in matches?"

"Well, I'm sure we can work things out when that problem arises, Taehyung. But for now, Jeongguk will be your ball boy."

"This is literally so unfair." Tae groaned. "A fully grown adult trailing behind me all day. It was bad enough when it was kids but at least they shut up at the presence of ice cream. I don't want Jeongguk to be my ball boy.

"Sorry am I interrupting your conversation about me? Should I leave?" Jeongguk asks, very pissed off.

"I couldn't care less; you'll be leaving by the end of the day." Tae sneered.

"Actually, I'm here for the summer."

"Not if I have anything to do with it." Tae said. "I'll get my dad to find a new replacement."

"Good luck with that; he was one of the first people who shook my hand today." Jeongguk said triumphantly.

"Oh my god please just shut the fuck up and leave. I don't want you here."

"Well tough shit coz I'm here to stay. Run me my money bitch." Jeongguk argued.

"Okay, well it seems like you two are getting on great." Hoseok said awkwardly, "I'll get going and um...be in my office. Far away from you two." He said as he left quickly, not wanting to be present when shit hit the fan.

"Well, I was under the impression that I'd be picking up tennis balls from the pitch today." Jeongguk said.

"It's called a court, you neanderthal." Taehyung corrected.

"Potato potahtoe." Jeongguk dismissed. "Are you going to stand there or are you going to play tennis? I get paid either way, so I don't care."

"Fine then." Taehyung said through gritted teeth. "If you're really here to stay, then I'm going to make your life miserable."

"I've already had to hold a conversation with you; I don't think it could get much worse than that." Jeongguk said smugly.

"Let's go and practice." Taehyung sighed, "I really don't have time for this."

"Whatever you say, Tae."

"Don't call me that."

"What can I call you then? TaeTae? Tata? Taehyungie? TootToot?"

"Nothing. Don't call me anything. I don't even want you to address me."

"Wow. Bossy boots." Jeongguk mumbled under his breath.

"Yeah, well you'd better get used to it, because I'll be in charge of you for the whole summer." Taehyung smirked mischievously. He picked up a sack of tennis balls and handed them to Jeongguk.

"Come along then. I've got so much for you to do."

"Dear god, kill me now." Jeongguk muttered.

"Hurry up!"

"Yeah yeah yeah I'm coming." Jeongguk rolled his eyes.

"Oh, and Jeongguk?" Taehyung turned around and batted his eyelashes sweetly.

"Yeah?"

"Your shorts are inside out." Taehyung laughed before walking off.

"Son of a bitch."

●●●

Hey whores 😝

Im cheating again by publishing the first chap of a new book instead of a oneshot 🤣 well it's actually a mash of chap 1 and 2 but oh well.

This is a new book I'm writing called "Ball Boy" 🥳🥳 It has switch Taekook in it hehehehe. I'm having a real ADHD moment rn so everything and nothing is going through my head so I literally don't know what to say now 🤣 there was something important I was supposed to say but I can't remember lmfao

I'll probably remember in an hour 😭😭😭

Byeeeeee

-bb