chapter one.

scene: hallway, classroom.

 the floor was white, tiled, and it shined beneath him with each step he took. shadows overwhelmed the space below his shoes. those were white too, however, not as shiny as the tile. there was a dry, aching feeling in his throat. that was to be expected. 

he approaches his next class, late.

"late again, jeongguk?" ms. lee pressed the boy, but no answer followed.

for all knew that jeongguk did not speak.

hastily, the boy nodded and approached his desk. his desk was in the middle of the classroom.

eyes were piercing him from all around. 

anxiously, he dug his shoes into the tiled floors and lowered his gaze, hoping to shake off their stares.

"we are covering the quantum theory today. we will delve into this topic piece by piece, as it may get confusing."

the boy paid little to no attention to the slurring words of his teacher. he never focused much in this class, anyways. it was his least favorite. 

feeling her gaze, he peeked over his shoulder, and at his friend: yeona.

yeona was paying attention; she was taking notes. jeongguk figured he should follow in her footsteps. instead, he fidgeted and tapped at his desk.

his dark eyes traveled, his lashes fluttered, and his gaze was soon focused on the window. he had the perfect view out of it. though it was not much of one. outside, was just the other school building.

that did not stop his ravaging inquisitiveness. 

the sunlight was calling out to him. he must look; he must. 

it was there, slumped against the building, that he noticed two boys. he squinted.

what were they up to? he was not sure. one was standing, the other not. 

he realized rather suddenly that the one not standing was taking a harsh beating from the one who was. he winced. 

the one standing reared back his arm just to thrust it downward. the one sitting lurched forward. the one sitting was huddled against the wall, cowering. jeongguk felt pity for the one taking the beating. 

but, a moment later, jeongguk had stopped looking. he stopped looking because, well, he did not want attention to be drawn. selfish. 

the board was now written on, and well beyond jeongguk's comprehension. he rushed to copy the words down, not knowing what they meant. 

he doubted he would know anyways, even if he did pay attention.

scene change: cafeteria.

"i wonder if they'll ever make something edible for lunch." 

yeona was seated across from the quiet boy now, who would nod at everything she said. 

he wanted to be verbal, but alas, could not be. 

then there was a terrible silence that fell between the two. yeona tapped at the table impatiently. her nails made nice sounds. they were pretty. 

jeongguk observed during the silence, since, what else could he do? 

he noticed with a heavy heart, that yeona was gazing over at a few people she knew. they were across the lunchroom, and by no means were they silent like he was. they could offer her much more. 

"jeongguk?" the boy looked to her as her voice sounded. it was soft, nervous. he could tell. whatever she would say proceeding this would hurt. 

"i am going to sit with them." she pointed. "i am sorry, sometimes, i just need to have a conversation that is not one-sided." 

okay, yeah. that stung. 

jeongguk nodded, and yeona got up to leave. 

the quiet boy frowned. he wanted nothing more than to talk. hell, if he could, he'd be talking every second of every day. but, those were only silly thoughts. thoughts that were in no way parallel to his reality. 

the boy, instead, looked about the cafeteria then, since it was all he could do. 

in the distance, there was a lonesome figure, one like himself. 

it was like he was staring in a mirror. 

this boy was dressed in dark colors. he looked tired. his body looked tired, from what jeongguk could see. he messed with the food on his tray, not looking like he had much of an appetite for it. 

jeongguk would go over and say hello, but it is very likely the lonely boy knows no sign. 

so, the quiet boy agreed with his looming fate. he will not speak to the lonesome figure. 

instead, he chews on a dry piece of bread, baked until it was nearly solid. swallowing was a long process that hurt when done, but it was entirely necessary. so, jeongguk ate the whole thing. his stomach groaned afterward.

the entire lunch period, jeongguk's eyes would carefully dart to the boy who sat by himself. the boy made no acknowledgement of jeongguk. 

lunch was over then, and soon too was the school day.

scene change: apartment.

the quiet boy went home after another day of silence and more silence. he crawled beneath his blankets, his toes curled into the warmth, the edges of his eyes housed plenty of tears. yet, they did not come.

the door sounded, and jeongguk got out of bed.

he headed for his bedroom door, and then the apartment door. through the peephole was a blurry, but familiar face. 

"jeonggukie?" the face said. 

jeongguk opened the door for his brother, and he pulled him into a tight hug. 

yugyeom.

"how are you doing?" he asks sweetly, and his hand traces delicately across the boy's throat. there is a scar there, it is not too big. it is, however, a painful reminder of his speech and his lack of it. 

jeongguk gave yugyeom a quick, shy thumbs up. he leaned into his brother's warmth.

when they pulled apart, yugeyom was taking his younger brother into the kitchen, pulling him along by the very end of his shirt sleeve.

"have you eaten?" he asks.

no. jeongguk signs. 

"how come? you know you can eat as much as you like, right? are you worried about the cost?" yugyeom is holding his cheek up to jeongguk's face now. jeongguk tries his best to not look his concerned brother in the eyes. 

it's not that. it's because it hurts to. jeongguk told him. yugyeom was understanding. 

"go shower, then? and get a bit of rest." 

jeongguk nodded and headed to the bathroom. he missed the comfort of his brother almost immediately. 

he felt gross. 

with himself. with what he had become. with how other people treated him, like he was to be pitied.

the shower made him feel better, and afterward he fell asleep in his bed. 

he was miserable.