I run into the girls' locker room bathroom. I barely make sure I'm alone before throwing my bag down and loosening my scarf. Holy hell. I just met Harry. How?

Nikki would flip out. Almost every other girl on campus would flip out. I forgot his name! I'm so embarrassed I can hardly breathe. Or maybe it's because I'm thinking about his neck and his forearms and his hand on my waist.

"Idiot," I mumble to myself, sitting on the edge of the benches.

"Elle, is that you?"

Shoot. A girl is walking around the side of the lockers. She steps out, a towel around her.

"Hey girl. Thought it sounded like you," Chloe says.

"Hey Chloe." I look at the space behind her, expecting to see Nikki emerge in-towel. "Where's Nikki?"

"Oh, still at the gym. I can't last that long. Left her back there to shower before dinner and... Are you okay?" Chloe stops talking abruptly, looking at me.

"What? Yea. I'm okay. I'm fine. It's just –wow is it really stuffy in here?" I yank the scarf from my neck completely.

"It's not too bad," Chloe laughs at me. "Do you need some air?"

"I think I do. I'm gonna–"

"Wait a sec. I'll change and I can go with you. We can get a coffee." Chloe looks me over. "Maybe an iced coffee."

I laugh and thank her and wait for her to change. Really, I want to rush back to my dorm, strip and shower, and stop thinking about my chance encounter with Harry.

My phone buzzes in my pocket. Shoot! It's Shawn.

Practice done
Dinner later?

I panic. I can't see him tonight. My fingers hammer my screen typing out a quick response.

Can't tn. Rain check?

I don't even wait for an answer before slipping my phone back into my pocket. One thing I'm thankful for: Jake doesn't have my number.

"Okay. Ready?" Chloe comes back, dressed in yoga pants and a sweatshirt.

"You know. I'm going to skip the coffee," I say, grabbing my bag.

"Sure. Let's hit the lounge instead. We can make cocoa or something. Wait for Nikki to get back." Chloe smiles, leading me out the door.

"Okay." I nod. At least I'll be back in my dorm building, safely away from the rec and famous strangers.

"So, are you going to tell me what's up?"

"Huh?"

"What you're worried about. Or stressing over." Chloe rolls her eyes at me.

"Oh. Just this essay I have to write by Monday. Haven't started." I lie.

"You haven't started an essay that's due in three days?" Chloe doesn't believe me.

"Exactly," I mumble.

I follow Chloe across campus. I spot Jake on the library steps again, loitering with a group of kids in black hoodies. I quickly sidestep Chloe, so I am on the other side of her, hiding myself from Jake's view. I do not need a repeat of the other night.

We walk into the lounge, and I crash onto the couch. I remove my mittens and scarf and giant coat and top layer sweater. I whip my hair into a high bun and take off my glasses.

"So," Chloe says, fumbling with the Keurig in the lounge. "Spill. What's the boy drama?"

"What gave it away?" I ask, resigned.

"Please. You're distracted. Keep checking your phone. Lying about fake papers." Chloe braids her hair into a ponytail beside the Keurig.

"The paper's not fake," I rebut.

"Maybe not. But pretending you haven't already finished it is." Chloe smiles, knowingly. She's right.

"Here. Take this," Chloe says, handing me a mug of hot chocolate.

"Thanks." I take the mug from her. Now that I'm calm and cooled down, the mug feels nice and warm against my thawing hands. "It's just, how do you decide when you want to be with someone? Or when you even just like someone?"

"How do you decide? You sort of don't. If you like them, you just already know you do." Chloe is shaking her head.

"Yes, but what if it's... more than one person? Then how can you tell?" I don't make eye contact.

"Ah, yes. The tell-between." Chloe is laughing.

"The tell-between?" I ask.

"Yea. Like how do you tell between two people or even three?" She nods.

"Exactly."

"I think different people make us feel different things. But you end up with whoever makes you feel most yourself." Chloe says, sipping her cocoa. "If that makes any sense."

"But how do I know which one even makes me feel like myself?" I ask. There're too many choices to make. Too many answers I will never get.

"You don't know. You never really do." Chloe shrugs.

"This is why I prefer to stick to books." I joke feebly.

"It's not so bad, Elle. Once you get the hang of it." She nods.

"I just wish it were easier, you know?"

"Ah, but then it wouldn't be nearly as exciting." Chloe stands from the couch and picks up her bag of gym clothes. "I have to put this in the room before dinner. If Nikki comes, tell her I'll meet her over there?"

I nod. "Thanks, by the way. It helped to say it all out loud."

"You've got some hard choices to make, girl." Chloe winks.

I frown to myself as she walks away, leaving me alone in the B suite lounge. Last night I couldn't stop thinking about Jake and Shawn and now Harry! What evil college cupid is doing this to me? Chloe is right. I do have some choices to make.

I pass Tasha in the hallway as she heads out for dinner –dressed to the nines. She left her laptop open playing music on her desk. Sort of ironic the song that's on. Though I don't know the words, I know the beat.

It's Harry's band. Gilded Rage. His voice is so smooth but also tantalizingly raspy. I can't believe I never appreciated it before. I glance at the title of the song before shutting Tasha's laptop, hoping it will also shut my mind to the song.

I change into pajamas and pick my outfit for tomorrow and try to focus on homework for my science GenEd. No luck. I can't stop singing the song I don't even know. I shift my book off my lap and curl back onto the pillows on my bed. I pull my laptop open and Google Harry's name.

I spend the next thirty minutes immersing myself in articles and images and interviews with him. I cannot believe he is playing for our silly Valentine's Day dance. I cannot believe I just ran him over on the stage behind the gym.

I cannot believe a lot right now.

...

Nikki comes to my room after dinner to discuss our plans for tomorrow night.

Tomorrow night is Nikki's payback. At least that's what she's calling it. I'm calling it the cheap thing it is: A lust-driven, with too-cheap beer and next to zero rules college party.

See also: Nightmare.

"You still hot and heavy with that football hottie?" Nikki asks.

"We aren't hot and heavy," I frown.

"Well, he's certainly hot," she counters.

"I guess..." I let my voice trail.

"Oh, what is it? Don't tell me you're second guessing. You need some fun!" Nikki props herself up on her elbows on my bed.

"Nothing," I lie.

"Don't tell me Jake is still on your mind! I told you, he's not worth it. Just loves to get under peoples' skin and–"

"I know. I know. I remember. Vividly." I shake my head, stopping her from saying any more.

"Well then, what is it?" She asks, frowning.

I'm not ready to divulge any details about meeting Harry, not yet.

"Actually, Nik," I say. "Can we talk deets tomorrow morning? I'm wiped."

"Okay, but don't think you're worming your way out of this party, Elle." Nikki slides from my bed and walks to the door without another look back.