Nikki and I walk back to change into some dry pants before going to the cafeteria for dinner. It's right after the last afternoon block and I know the cafeteria will be a total mad house for Pasta Night.

Part of me wonders if I'll run into Shawn.

"What a great first day!" I exhale into the cold, opening the door to our dorm lobby.

"You're too much, Elle. It was class. No one is ever as excited about class as you are," Nikki says, laughing at me.

"Not true. People just pretend not to be. But I love first days. They're so –new." I can't help but feel embarrassed. Maybe I am too nerdy for my own good.

"I guess." Nikki shrugs. "Not mad about Mr. Banks, though. How do they expect us to focus on analytics and context in historical literature with him around?" She flings her bag onto the lobby couch.

"Nikki!" I laugh. "He's a teacher... Our teacher!"

"Yea, a sexy one. You're lucky I even got the name of the class right."

"And aren't you into girls, considering you're dating one and all?" I tease.

"Sure, doesn't mean I don't appreciate a fine piece of a–"

"Okay! I get it," I laugh.

"I'm amazed you agreed to come to dinner. Didn't think I could pull you from the library on the first day back," Nikki says.

"Carter had to reschedule our study sesh, or else I'd be at the tower," I tell her.

"You love the library clock tower," she says, rolling her eyes.

"What's not to love?"

The clock tower is what we (the collective student body) call the small, cramped room on the second floor of the library. It's dubbed the quiet room. As if any rooms in any libraires are ever loud.

We both take out our laptops and set up shop on coffee table in the first-floor lounge. There are only three other people in the lounge right now. Two boys I recognize from last semester are both browsing on their phones. A girl I've never seen is unpacking her books onto another table. She's got her hair pulled back and old school glasses that make her eyes look bulging and buggy. I wonder if that's how bookish I seem to people.

"So, have you heard about the party from Darren?" Nikki asks, looking over the edge of her phone.

"Yup," I nod. "It's tonight apparently."

"Tonight! We are so going. You have an outfit, right? Wait, who cares? We can pick one out after dinner." Nikki looks excited at the prospect of dressing me up like her doll.

"Nikki, it's a school night. I'm only going to drop by early and say hi and show face so I can leave. And you're only getting that much because it's in my own building."

I open my agenda organizer on my laptop. Time to start organizing all my study sessions and color-coding my homework grids and everything else Nikki will judge me for if she ever finds out.

"How do you expect to meet someone with that attitude?" Nikki raises her eyebrow.

"I don't..." I smirk. A fuzzy image of Shawn springs into my mind.

"Oh, come on, Elle." Nikki sighs.

"You sound like my mother," I laugh.

Sure, mom always wants me to focus and do well and get good grades, but I know she secretly wishes I would date Shawn and fall in love and have a man in my life. I know, I know. How cliché. How 1990 of my mom.

"Well, you might just meet someone anyway. Jake is coming and he's already met like five friends, and he's been here for what, 17 minutes? Some of them are pretty hot too." Nikki ticks her tongue against her teeth. "I guess one good thing came from him deciding to come here."

Jake. I almost went a whole twenty minutes without thinking about our encounter this morning –without thinking about his hands and his smile and –ugh!

"He seems nice." It's all I can muster right now. Don't want Nikki to read too much into my comments about her brother –her twin brother.

"Nice? He's Jake. We get along when we do and don't when we don't." Nikki shrugs.

"Seems right." I laugh. How would I know? Not only do I not have a twin, but also, I am an only child. Zero siblings.

"Don't get any ideas," Nikki says. She eyes me suspiciously.

"Please. Have you met me?" I smirk. But as I think of Jake and his tight jeans and lean, muscly arms, I can't help but smirk to myself as well. "Plus, he's not my type at all."

"I mean it, E. This isn't like, don't get any ideas, but it's okay if you do get them." Nikki puts large air quotes around half her sentence. "I know he fooled my parents into letting him move to campus, but he's bad news, Elle."

"I got it. Plus, you know how much I love my books and studying. Like I have time to get any ideas." I return her air quotes, rolling my eyes.

"I know you. But I know Jake too," she says, crossing her arms and frowning. "And that's what worries me."

"You have nothing to worry about."

Nikki seems to believe me. Just wish I believed myself.

"Girl, answer your phone before it explodes. Hello? You there, E?" Nikki waves her hands in front of my face.

"What? Oh. Sorry," I say, snatching my phone up.

I didn't even notice its chiming and buzzing for the last three minutes. Three social media notifications and three messages. All from Shawn. My stomach does a little flip.

Hi Ellie

So are we going to hang out more?

We really should :)

I think about him saying we should be friends. I think about us having the conversation next to my kitchen sink. I think about how he looked lit up by all the holiday lights. Is this real life? Shawn Carr wants to hang out with me? In a capacity other than the familiar familial obligation?

"Look at you, smiling at your phone." Nikki teases. She's engrossed in some Vogue or Cosmo mag. I'm surprised she even saw me smile at Shawn's texts to be honest.

"Not at my phone," I say.

"Then at who?" Nikki asks.

"Nothing. No one." I change the subject. "So back to the party tonight..."

...

9:00 PM.

It's party time.

If I had it my way, I would be getting ready for bed, reading over my new textbooks and breathing in their intoxicating new textbook smell, and selecting my outfit for tomorrow. I can almost phantom feel my plush pillows piled high on my dorm bed right now. Instead, I'm sitting with Lucy in the lounge, waiting for Nikki and Chloe to arrive –waiting for Darren to give some over-the-top speech –waiting for him.

Nikki stopped by earlier and forced me into the tightest pair of jeans I own. They're so tight and so not me I am not even sure why I brought them to school with me in the first place. I will certainly be losing them in the wash after tonight.

None of my "uptight" sweaters were acceptable for a party, so Nikki brought me one of hers. It is a little too tight for me, but it's a pretty chunky knit so it doesn't show off too much. I feel comfortable at least.

"Just look how cute she is, ugh!" Lucy says next to me.

"Huh?" I look up and toward the door where Lucy is looking.

Oh. Chloe just walked in, wearing a little purple dress and matching scarf. As if it's not 20 degrees on the other side of those double doors.

Lucy has had a crush on Chloe since they met at orientation two weeks before school started last semester. Then Chloe met Nikki the first week of school. And I haven't stopped hearing about it since!

"Luce, there are tons of girls that would love to date you. Why are you hung up on just one?" I try to pretend to give advice I'd want to hear.

"Coming from you?" Lucy scoffs. Lucy stands up, determined. "I'm going to go talk to her."

"Okay," I sigh, shrugging. "I am staying out of it."

Lucy crosses the room to Nikki and Chloe, passing by Darren. He's wearing a ridiculously neon lime colored shirt that matches the rim of his glasses. He's carrying a stack of plastic cups. Oh boy. If I've learned anything from college parties, it's that plastic cups are never a good sign. They're harbingers.

"Elle, a little help." Darren says, looking at me.

"Sure." I hop off the couch and walk over to him to take a stack of the harbingers. "You're a very responsible RA."

"Very funny. If everyone is going to drink, they may as well do it where they are safe. It's called science." He opens a second bag of cups. "And what's safer than an on-campus dorm."

"Can't you get in trouble for this? Like, fired, no longer an RA kind of trouble?" I laugh.

"Only if we're caught," Darren hisses. "Which we never are. I don't let part-time mall cop slacker security guards catch wind of my parties. Uh-uh. Nope. Plus, I need this party, girl. It is slim pickins' on campus, so I invited like 10 guys off GrindR. Be on the lookout."

"You're the most extra. I love it," I laugh.

"You better." Darren nudges me. "Okay, I'm off. Shout when you need a refill."

"Sure," I smile. As if I will need a refill.