FRIDAY morning right before my class, and after I purchased my most essential caffeine for the day— one to wake up, another to function — I was nibbling on a piece of buttered toast when I finally got the go to move to my new apartment.

The first person I called was my mom, which of course went straight to voicemail.

Leaving a voicemail should be enough, I thought, finishing off the bread in my mouth.

Working for a big company as a lawyer meant a lot of meetings and business trips. After she was swiped from a firm to an in-house position, her salary more than just doubled, and it meant sacrificing a lot of personal time.

So our conversations were mostly between messages from few hours back, and the odd voicemail or two.

My mother always said if you were going to sacrifice something, you should see to it until the end.

Her voicemail droned in her familiar business politeness, and the clear background that I know she rehearsed and made perfect. Nothing my mother made was less than perfect.

'This is Marion Karr-Bright. I am unable to take your call at the moment, but I will get back to you as quickly as possible."

"Hi mom," I started after the beep. My voice sounded cheery and friendly, unusually high but stable. "So the apartment is available now, all the papers and deposits are done. Claudia's brother, Jordan, has a truck and they'll help me move in later today after her classes. I'm really excited about it. Thank you for getting me in contact with Gabe. Anyway, I hope you're having a blast in Sweden. Talk to you soon."

I took a deep breath and straightened my shoulders, with my planner's to-do list going around my head for the best way I can finish all of them by the day ends.

"Okay, let's finish this."

The day went by, classes in between and picking up as many snacks as I could because I knew I was going to skip lunch. Textiles class after, my fingers felt raw after passing the newest assignment.

"We should make plans to visit the museum Professor Arnold said. The one with the special weaving specimen thing," one of my classmates, David said, chewing on the edge of his ballpen.

Piper with their blond hair and neon green nails, snorted beside him. "The what of what now?"

David flipped them off. When he looked up and met my gaze, he pushed his glasses back. "You okay there?"

I smiled tightly. I had remade and restarted the thread of my assignment four times in the past two days. "Just peachy."

He pursed his lips. "I have lotion if you want some?"

"That would be amazing."

While he rifled through his bag, I watched him. If Asher was a Greek god in long blond tresses and sharp cheekbones, David had dark hair reminiscent of a Herculean Hero with a solid jaw and shadows under his eyes.

Roslyn smiled as she scrolled through her phone. "I found a Floral Dyeing Class online. If we came as a group of more than four, we could get a discount."

"We need one more." Piper turned to me with an arched eyebrow and mischievous grin as they shot David a look. "Nadine?"

I felt aware of David as I answered, "I can't do today, sorry. I'm moving into an apartment."

"Oh my gosh, that's so nice!"

Piper raised their eyebrow. "Close to campus? After the semester started?" At my nod, they looked impressed. "Damn. Must be expensive."

"A little bit, but with two years in the dorm, I have enough saved up. Sorry on the museum and class today though, but if you guys have anything else next weekend, I'd be more than happy."

Roslyn smiled. "Cool, have fun with the moving."

"Here." David stood and placed something in my hand, closing my hand over it. He ran a hand through his hair as he looked down at me. He was tall; tall enough that if I slant my head just enough, our lips would touch. He did look like a tease though.

I wasn't looking to date anyone at the moment, with everything going on and the recent breakup, but hinting wouldn't be too bad now would it?

"Thank you." I touched his wrist lightly, a feather-light glance. I smiled softly at him as I grabbed my bag. "I'll bring it back to you, okay?"

He stared at me for a second too long. "...Okay."

When I left the classroom and I heard Piper's laughter and teasing, I opened my palm. A hand lotion and a post it note of his number.

I went to find Claudia with a grin.

CLAUDIA HEINZ, 4:15PM: Outside, babe!! Quad now!!

The truck saw me first, blasting a couple rounds of honks with Claudia slapping her baby brother on his head, cursing him in German for her poor ears. When I approached, laughing and shushing, Ross sprung out from behind the bed like a ringmaster version of a Jack in the Box.

"Come on, come all, haul assing as Thanksgiving rolls in!"

I simpered a laugh and waved at Jordan. For a senior in high school, Jordan already towered his oldest sister. Not just in height but also in mass. Quarterback with a promising future, muscles straining against his plain white shirt, and a nice smile— no wonder Claudia constantly complained about the string of girls he brought home.

But he was a goofy kid with a truck, and I found him funny.

"Hi Jordan. Thanks for the help."

"No problem." His smile was wide, teeth white and nearly blinding. "I'm the guy with the truck."

I clicked a finger. "And I'll pay you, I promise."

Claudia waved that away from the passenger seat, straining from her side to her brother's as she elbowed Jordan in the face. "Don't worry about it, Naddy. This little freak owes me."

"Little," Jordan complained.

"Freak," Ross snorted. Then he waved me over. "Come on up, sport. Let's go hauling all your shit. You aren't wearing a skirt, right?"

I took his offered hand and hauled myself over the truck. "I am but I can manage. And let's not call my things shit and maybe I'll buy you pizza."

"Top it off with milkshakes and you're on."

"My cheat day isn't until tomorrow!" Jordan bemoaned from inside. Then a smack.

"Who cares about you?" Claudia complained. Ross and I laughed. "Fire up the gas and let's go!"

Hours later, all of my boxes hauled and unpacked, the move was done. It was a modest apartment in an old building as close as I could manage to campus with my budget, and the one thing I really enjoyed about it were the windows from my living room. I watched as the sky slowly darkened into a variety of colors and shades.

We were lounging on the still pristine space, the urge to design some murals against the white walls and all the colors I could match against the sofa— two pizzas out and everyone slumped on some corner from a job well done — it was then that I noticed I received several messages from my mom and Bucky.

8:40 PM, MOM: Hi my love! I'm out of Sweden right now, Norway is a beaut. Your Uncle Frank and I love it here. My work is pretty lax at the moment, so we have pretty much been touring around together, like a second honeymoon. It's wonderful.

8:43 PM, MOM: I'm so glad you've finally moved in! Say thanks to Claudia and her brother for me. Also I just saw Ross' Instagram - I think I should thank him too? And please tell him he's kidding no one, lying down in sweat over your new sofa with his buttons popped open.

8:45 PM, MOM: I miss you my darling girl. Everyday and always. I've talked to your dad, he's very excited to have you guys over for Thanksgiving. Apparently, Nika is going to make some sort of spicy shrimp soup. And papaya salad? Anyway, I'll see you guys at Christmas, okay? Love you, мой олень.

I smiled at receiving the last part. I was always 'my deer' to her while my baby brother was 'my tiger'. He got her dark blonde hair, her pointy nose and small, oval face. Dad said I got most of what's left— her air of regality and steady mindset. That made sense for my mother, who did ballet since she was five after babushka forced her to take them. As she did to all her children. My dad always complained I was too skinny for my age, especially when I was growing up, but he had a high metabolism himself.

Clicking through my other message, I got through Bucky's.

9:03 PM, BUCKY CHOI: I got a date!

9:03 PM, BUCKY CHOI: messages cant say how excited and how much I want to vomit but jesus christ do i want to vomitohmygod huplp m e

9:08 PM, BUCKY CHOI: I took a little break to breathe, I think I'm fine.

9:09 PM, BUCKY CHOI: im still not but we're going to ignore it, if ur not busy can u help me prepare???? For it???? Things to say, things to not say and do and make and yodel

9:10 PM, BUCKY CHOI: do you know I yodel? Fun fct, I know how to yodel.

9:10 PM, BUCKY CHOI: I yodel like a master. I took a class when I was seven because I thought it was cool. I still think it's cool. It's really cool, yodeling, I could teach you.

9:12 PM, BUCKY CHOI: pls help me

9:12 PM, BUCKY CHOI: I might teach the girl i'm going out with tonight w my yodeling i dont think she would be impressed

9:13 PM, BUCKY CHOI: she might leave me in the middle of dinner pls send help

9:13 PM, BUCKY CHOI: pls send YOU help

9:13 PM, BUCKY CHOI: i need u

"Jesus," Ross muttered, his chin on my shoulder, scooting as far into my space as possible without my notice to push him away. "He sounds like a poor lovesick puppy waiting for his owner at the door."

I made a face, pushing him off. "He is not a puppy. Wipe some of your sweat and stop breathing against my ear."

He leaned back against the sofa, arching a slow eyebrow.

"Who is asking for help. For a date," I countered at that silent judgment. Then stood up. "Go away."

"You're the one leaving, baby!" Ross called out as I went to my room, locking my door, just as I heard Claudia asked who texted. Going through his contacts, I press to call. Neither of them were well versed in the art of privacy.

The first ring hadn't really come through when he answered.

"Nadine." The rushed, drawn out way he said my name, full of relief and excitement— made my insides twist.

"Hey. I'm sorry I didn't answer. I was moving into my new apartment today," I explained swiftly, sliding my foot around the floor. Most of the boxes in my room had been left unpacked, but the ones of my clothes were already hung. "A date huh? That's an amazing step."

"Yeah, I know thank you," he rushed, nerves eating away his vowels. It was adorable. "I need you to come here. Right now. I don't know what to wear and it's in fifteen minutes."

I smiled, turning to the door. When I swung it open, Ross and Claudia stumbled among themselves, having been pressed against the door with Jordan eyeing all of us from the living room with an amused grin.

Ignoring them all, I went for my keys.

"Good thing your house is three minutes away. Walk me through what type of date it is and how you asked her out— do not spare the details, we will need this for your outfit."

"Making a fool of myself but still thinking I looked adorable will help how I dress?"

I was out of the apartment amidst the shouts of protest from behind my door slam, jogging down the stairs with careful and quick precision. I smiled through the situation. "Okay. Okay. We can work with that. Go with something casual. A sweater maybe? One that's snug enough to enunciate your broad shoulders but not enough to you know, constrict. And jeans! And shoes! Any clean pair."

"Okay, a-are you running? You're huffing, are you running to my house?"

I grinned, breathless. I couldn't even answer him. Since moving a lot closer to the cluster of houses and apartments priced for students, I realized soon enough that I was just two blocks from his house. This made things reasonably easier for emergencies. Dating emergencies for him, maybe waffle emergencies for me.

"Oh my god," was his last comment just as I rounded up the corner and jumped up on his porch, in time for his door to open— and I halted.

Because Bucky didn't have a shirt on.

And he did not disappoint.

"Okay, o-oh wow. Wow." My ears burned and I tried to contain the grin that escaped and reached ear to ear. Bucky— for all intents and purposes, god bless his pure heart — did not seem to understand my barely contained giggles.

"W-what? Why did you run - "

"First, let's address public nudity," I gasped through the giggling, attempting to grab my bearings together. "One, it's frowned upon if it's not illegal. Two, I think you're giving your neighbors a Magic Mike volume three."

"Wa—" His face cleared once he felt the breeze on his naked nipples, his neck and ears blushing, before he slammed the door. Point two second later, he opened it again, hiding behind it to let me in while I was bent over laughing my ass off.

I half crawled inside while he closed the door at the same speed I was crawling— and finally crumpled over the other side of the door.

I laid down flat on my back on the cold tile, trying to bring in oxygen to my lungs. Then I realized he was laughing with me, starting off shaky before he was on his back, on the floor too, having the same squeezing-my-stomach type of laughter.

"This—" I gasped, laughter dying down to giggles. " — is the funniest first date experience ever. And we're like... we haven't even started yet."

"I— " He met my eye, leaning against the door for support. My eyes zeroed on his defined torso before I cursed myself and met his eyes defiantly. He was red from collarbone to forehead. Apparently, laughing made him ten times redder. "Crap. I think we wasted nine minutes. I was just. I was trying to get ready. As ordered."

"You shouldn't be too good at taking orders."

"What?"

"Nothing." I picked myself up and offered him a hand. He took it, his grip strong, and stood. "Come on. Show me your clothes and let's fix you up."

Less than five minutes later, browsing his clothes and then snooping around the things in his room while he changed— clean and made bed, a TV and three lines of shelves that surrounded a full wall behind his bed filled with rows and rows of books that shocked me half a step — we finally picked an outfit just at the dot.

"People who pull off this buttery yellow are dangerous. And yet, here we are." I stood behind him on a mirror in the second floor hallway, apparently owned by his sister before him, and now used by the three guys as a staple stop just before running down the stairs and out to their day.

Like this, side by side, a lot of our differences became stark.

He was half a head taller, even with my stature and straightened posture. Beside him, the straight cut lights and well defined built, I looked like I had softer edges. A bit of curves when I pursed my lips might not be enough. His floppy hair combed through once with his fingers, artfully done in a way that was casual but not careless. His sweater was a mellow yellow with a white button up tucked in with the collar visible.

In jeans, sneakers, he looked cute. Adorable. It was admittedly a make or break outfit. Especially for a first date. But most of Bucky's charm came from the first experience.

"This way," I continued, my sentiments half lost in thought as I swept my hands over his shoulders. Jesus, he really does have good shoulders. "She'll find you endearing with the yellow sweater. Confident but cute. It'll be a very memorable memento."

He nodded jerkily. "Okay." He was unsure about the yellow, but he wore it anyway. The trust made me happy.

I smiled. "Trusting my expert opinion can get you far in life, my son." I checked the clock by the foyer. "Alright, time's up. You should hurry. Good luck."

He stared at me. "Oh... kay."

"If it goes well, you should kiss her just before you stop by her door. Just remember— let it flow, see where the moment takes the other. Okay? Go through the natural current, be charming, be cute, be goofy. You can do this, Bucky Choi. I believe in you."

When I got back home, saying goodbye to Claudia and Jordan— the latter had passed out because Claudia refused to leave until I showed up to explain and get scolded — Ross deemed the streets inappropriate for public transportation and welcomed my extra bedding.

He raised an eyebrow. "Bougie ass."

"Sleep outside, you homeless bigot."

"Did I tell you how pretty you are today?"

We settled together with a thick afghan, some popcorn and a shared lasagna pan, and FRIENDS season six playing.

Just as Phoebe tried on the tiara and held out a musket, my Ross popped popcorn in and elbowed me.

"Hey."

"Ow."

"You're really taking this mentoring duty for real. Running to save his... topless ass."

He snickered while I elbowed him back. Firm. "He was trying to get ready by my instructions, but I needed to see his closet. I wanted to help. And hey, he has like, a serious collection of books in his room. It was insane. Mrs. Kaufman would've married him if she saw."

Mrs. Kaufman was the young excited librarian on campus. She loved the books, loved the kids who loved the books, and cursed those who used the library for other means.

She particularly despised Ross.

"Bookish, introverted, can't flirt, can't date, gets dumped..." Each finger tick, Ross shook his head. "Why are you doing this for, Nadine Lynch? You don't mentor, you don't... take in cute guys to mentor. What do you get out of this?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly, snuggling the afghan close to my chin. I was a blanket hoarder while Ross was a munching hoarder, keeping the popcorn between his arms. He barely shared nachos, and refused to share dessert and milkshake. You share a plate of fries with him and half of it would be gone by the blink of an eye. "But he did say I could have an owe. Anything I want."

"Anything, huh?"

"Yeah." I shrugged. "I don't really know what to ask, so I'm keeping it in my arsenal."

"Hmm. A pretty Architecture student might be useful."

As the next episode played, I remembered a message I got from Esther.

"Oh, hey. Esther said it's the fifteenth day on Wednesday," I said conversationally while he hummed his assent. "So..."

"So?"

"I don't know."

His smile was wry, poking my cheek with a greasy finger. "You want to ask me if I'll still continue my break up with her? You know I will, Naddy darling. A contract is a contract. We date for fifteen days and it's over."

"Did she— I mean..."

"No, I'm parting with her amicably." He grinned his Cheshire grin. Hooded gray eyes, that neat beard, and that sharp jaw. Ross was pretty and he knew it. The whole world knew it. They called him a player because he dated in contracts. And some of them— those who fall in love within those periods — get heartbroken because they want more.

But that was Ross. He had his contracts and he kept to them. He fell in and out of love in that period.

Yes it wasn't normal, but this is the way he did love, though he was convinced that it wasn't love as it was a fun time between two adults. He still got his dates, got his girlfriends and boyfriends. It was unconventional, to say the least, but no amount of gossip could change him, as much as no amount of person could make him fall in love for more than fifteen days.

"Oh, well, okay. At least you'll have her in your amicably parted lovers list. We always love a clean break."

He snorted and that was that. Soon, we got bored of our episodes and bid our good nights. He used the bathroom first, taking at a length to do his eight-step skincare routine, courtesy of Esther. Just as I finished up after, twisting my hair as I rested my head on a pillow, my phone buzzed.

At first, I was sure it was my mom; my dad wouldn't be able to contact me yet with his voyage in the amazon, and my brother slept early lately from his martial arts class, until I saw Bucky's name.

Swiping, I smiled at the dry message. Back to his usual stoic texting self.

12:02 AM, BUCKY CHOI: Date went well. Kissed her goodnight and all. Which sounds weird telling someone about, but considering you're my mentor, well. There. She was nice, thought I was pretty cute in my yellow sweater. Thanks Naddy. Good night. Don't reply until morning.

I snorted, but did as requested, smiling as I closed my eyes.

Good night then, Bucky Choi.

мой олень = my deer.