27. Yun meri khamoshi mein mere saath rehne ka shukriya (Thank you for being there with me in my silence.)

•°•

I revealed everything to dad.

I know I should have talked to Meghna first, tried to make her see the correct picture, but the way she was acting lately, there was no way she will listen to me. And there's also the elder sibling superiority complex she has.

To be honest, I was worried right now. Dad had immediately phoned her and demanded her presence back home. While he discussed the matter with Mom, I was told to go back to my room. I can foresee a humongous fight coming and I'll be targeted as the instigator in Meghna's eyes.

I can't argue for the life of me.

I just can't.

It overwhelms me. My thoughts jumble up, my head finds it unable to comprehend them into words and I end up standing quiet or leaving the place in the middle of the argument. I absolutely detest arguing, because I know, even if I'm right, I won't be able to prove my point or even take a stand for myself.

Meghna is wild when it comes to verbal sparring. She raises her voice, shuts the other person up, and doesn't let them talk until she has put forward her side. I hope dad controls the upcoming catastrophe and makes her understand that she was in the wrong.

"You're stressed again," Priya interrupted my thoughts, bringing my attention to her.

I flipped the page of the book, unwilling to acknowledge her statement.

"What happened?"

I shook my head, attempting to focus on the book. Even fiction wasn't able to distract me.

Unlike everyone else, she didn't give up on interrogating me. Vikram has the same habit. I claim it as curiosity, he calls it worry.

Priya wheeled the chair closer, taking the book from my hands and putting it on the nightstand. "Is it about Meghna?"

I swallowed. "Shall we go out?"

Priya frowned. "We- We just came."

I nodded. "I know-" the doorbell rang, flinching me. She was home. Fuck.

"What is it? What did you talk about with your dad? About us moving out?" She speculated.

I nibbled on my lower lip. "I told him what we saw. And also, what I saw this morning."

Priya's brows furrowed in confusion so I attempted to explain everything in detail.

"Did I make a hasty decision?" I asked softly, feeling a clench in my stomach when Priya took too long to answer.

"Probably?"

My eyes widened.

"I mean, you could have met him first before deriving a judgment so harsh? It's obvious she'll defend him, right? They've been together for three months now. And yeah, I understand your point too, no grown man would want to settle with being someone's secret boyfriend. That's a little weird. But if he's suggesting live in, then maybe he is planning to meet your family as well?" She surmised calmly.

Anxiety and nervousness settled into me with full force. "Shit, you're right. I shouldn't have told dad immediately. Fuck." I raked a hand through my hair.

"Aditya, it's okay. Calm down." She placed a hand on my thigh.

"No, Priya, I did not make it sound positive like you did. Dad was furious." I muttered worriedly.

She sighed. "She'll be angry for a while. But she'll understand later. Don't worry."

I shook my head. "You don't know, Meghna. She doesn't hold back."

"I don't understand why you didn't talk to her first. Or maybe you could have told Avinash?"

I swallowed. How do I tell her the kind of equation I've with my siblings? I've no deep bond with them. Before Priya came into my life, at least Bhai acted like a big brother, but now he's just busy ignoring me. There was no way I could have approached Meghna and had any sort of heart-to-heart conversation with her. We were too old to form any deep connection when I was brought back from Dadi's house. As an eight-year-old me, who was emotionally recluse from my family for the first two years because I missed living with my grandparents and my own family felt like strangers I used to meet as guests for eight years, I had a hard time adjusting to the fact that I belonged here.

By the time I began coming out of my shell, Bhai was too old to entertain a kid and Meghna was in her 'eww I hate boys' phase, her majorly extroverted attitude didn't help either. It's pathetic how I have a family, yet I feel like I don't belong anywhere.

"Let's go out," I whispered. I'm already drained from socialising too much today, I can't face Meghna if she has nothing good to say.

Priya sighed. "Okay, let's go," she agreed easily, taking me by surprise. I felt understood without even needing to explain myself. It brought a small smile to my face.

We both got up, and she waited until I grabbed a hoodie to wear on top of my t-shirt. She draped a shawl around her shoulders, wasting no time reaching for my hand when we were ready to go out.

The harsh knock on the door stalled us.

Priya left my hand to open the door.

I sighed in defeat when Meghan stood on the other side, with a tear-stricken face and betrayed eyes. "Why did you tell them?"

I lowered my eyes.

"What is your problem, Adi!?" She demanded harshly.

"You weren't trying to see the whole thing."

"What whole thing!?" She snapped. "How can you know everything about what happens in my life!? You're not living it for God's sake! You don't know Pratik the way I do! You haven't even met him! Yet you spout all that bullshit to Dad! Framing me as naive and Pratik as an asshole!"

I gulped. "I- I was worried. You said you want to move in-"

"It's my life, Aditya!" She screamed, startling me. "Who the fuck gave you the right to intervene! You did not see me forcing myself into your life! If you were worried, you could have talked to me! But no, you directly went to dad! Now he's asking to meet Pratik's family! I told you they're toxic, didn't I!?"

"Meghna, calm down. He meant no harm-"

"Shut up," she snapped at Priya. "It's between me and my brother. Don't interfere."

I clenched my jaw. "Meghna, watch what you say."

She scoffed. "Bura laga na? Jab tumhari biwi ko bola maine, bura laga na? Aur tum jo Pratik ke bare mein Dad ko sunake aaye ho, uska kya!? Tum toh uska naam tak nahi jaante the! (Stung, right!? When I talked to your wife in that tone!? And what about you speaking bullshit regarding Pratik to dad!? You didn't even know his name!)" She accused.

"Meghna, enough!" Dad commanded as he came. Mom and Bhai arrived following him, the latter looked confused about the whole ordeal. I rubbed my temples in exhaustion. "He is your brother! He was worried and hence he did nothing wrong by telling me about you and Pratik!"

"Aur nahi toh kya, Meghna, tu teen mahine ke relationship ke liye live-in ka soch rahi thi. Of course, woh pareshan hoga. (Exactly, Meghna, you were thinking about moving out for a three-month-long relationship. It's given, he'll be worried for you.)" Mom explained in a calm voice.

Meghna chuckled mirthlessly. "I was not going to lie, Mumma! We were going to tell you. Pratik wanted to meet you guys for a while. But there was already so much going on, Aditya's marriage, the tension between you and Dadi, Priya's addition into the family. I just needed some time!" She sniffed, harshly brushing off the tears that brimmed in her eyes.

"Agar tu itni hi desperate hai, toh shaadi kar le. Yeh live in vagerah kya hai? (If you're so desperate, get married. What is this live in and all?)" Dad demanded angrily.

"Because we want to see if we're compatible, Dad!" She screeched in frustration. "Har koi aapke bete aur bahu ki tarah nahi hota, ki pehli mulakat hui aur kud gaye shaadi ke mandap mein! That's what desperation is, not this! (Not everyone's like your son and daughter-in-law, dad! Not everyone jumps to get married after one meeting. That's what desperation is, not this!)" She spat condescendingly.

"Meghna!" Mom snapped.

She ignored them and looked at me with bloodshot eyes and drenched cheeks. "Khud toh apni life mein kuch kar nahi paya, aur meri life mein ghusa aa raha hai. Job ke liye tujhe Vikram ki jarurat padi, Shaadi ke liye maa ki, aur ab Shaadi ke baad apni biwi ki. Pehle apni life jeena sikh, phir baat karna sahi galat ki. (You failed to do anything in your life, so now you're interfering in mine. For the job, you needed Vikram's help, for marriage, Mom and now after marriage, wife. First, learn how to live your own life, then come and teach me about right and wrong.)" She stated bitterly before storming out of my room, leaving everyone in a harsh silence.

"Adi, bacche uske baaton ka bura mat maan- (Adi, darling don't take her words to heart-)" she stopped abruptly when I ripped off the car keys from the hanger and strode out of the room, desperate to get out of the suffocating four walls.

I took the elevator to the ground floor and headed toward the parking lot.

On my way to the car, I pressed on the fob, unlocking it, and opened the door when I reached it before slamming the door shut. Tossing the keys on the dashboard, I let go of the sobs I was holding back.

I couldn't even deny what she said. But it hurt so fucking much. As if all the insecurities that I was hiding from within were ripped off from their safe space and shoved right into my face. I was in the wrong. I shouldn't have interfered in her life. I had no right.

Removing my glasses, I placed them on the dashboard and leaned in, burying my face in the fold of my arms. My cries were soft that slowly transformed into frequent sniffles. I lay my head on the steering, staring into the space blankly.

There was no point in blaming her because she was right. I did need Vikram's recommendation letter since he was the one who had offered me an internship at his office before helping me out to get the job at GameScape. I was dependent on Mom because talking to women made me a nervous mess. And about being dependent on my wife, then in a few weeks, even that'll come true considering I'm incapable of providing her a house or a decent place to stay.

I don't understand what audacity I had to interfere in her life. I never let her do the same. So why couldn't I mind my own business? She is a Goddamn adult, she definitely knows what she is doing.

Priya was right. I shouldn't have made a hasty decision.

No matter how stressed I was because of Bhai, Mom, and my financial incapabilities, I had no right to feel in control by trying to tell Meghna what to do.

The door to the passenger side opened, startling me. I sat up straight, frowning at Priya who closed the door before looking at me.

"You were quiet for a while so I assumed you were finally ready for a company," she mumbled in a feeble voice.

I sighed, not bothering to clean my cheeks as the tears had already dried.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I shook my head.

"Okay," she whispered.

We sat in complete silence for a while, staring outside our particular windows, even though there was absolutely nothing to see except for other cars.

"Do you want to go on a long drive?" She asked breaking the silence.

I was not in the mood to drive.

"I'll drive." She said, as though answering my thoughts.

Nodding, I stepped out from the driver's side and she did the same. We replaced seats. A few minutes later, we were driving down the empty roads.

I opened the window of my side, letting the cold harsh winds hit me in the face. My eyes fell close on their own accord, and I counted the street lights we left behind every time a flash of orange glowed beneath my closed lids. I rested my head on the seat, relaxing with slouched shoulders.

An hour later, the car stopped on the outskirts of the city. We stayed inside, watching the glimmering lights from the high upland.

"Preeti once told me I should stop acting like our parents because I'm not them and they are dead. She didn't appreciate my needless involvement in her life."

I looked at her in confusion. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

She chuckled. "No, what I mean is, we say words we don't mean when we're angry. Meghna was angry. She didn't mean them."

"Maybe. But she was right. Whatever she said was the truth." I shrugged.

Priya didn't speak further.

"Take me back home," I said putting on the seatbelt.

Priya obeyed wordlessly. The drive back home was just as silent. I laid my head on the seat and closed my eyes, trying to catch a wink taking the advantage of the moving car to lull me to sleep. It worked.

Priya woke me up when we reached. I sat straight, rubbing the corner of my eyes with my fists as she backed the car into its usual parking spot. She cut the engine off, sitting quietly afterward.

"Are we not getting out?" I asked with a frown.

"I was waiting for you to step out first," she muttered softly.

Oh.

Nodding, I opened the door and exited the car. She did the same, before quickly reaching out to hold my hand. I gripped it tighter, glad to have her by my side even though in times like these, I usually preferred to be alone. But her presence settles me. Seeing how calm and composed she is every time, gently undoes all the knots in my head.

The house was absolutely quiet when we entered. The lights were off too so I led Priya to our bedroom since she is afraid of the dark. We separated after entering the four walls. She closed the door while I went to the bathroom to wash my feet and hands. The splash of cold water on my face felt nice. She entered the bathroom after my exit.

Putting my glasses on the nightstand, I lay on my side of the bed and turned to face the wall. Soon, I felt the dip on the other side of the bed, I took that as a signal to turn off the lights.

"Aditya?" She whispered in the dark.

I pretended to be asleep.

"Good night, Aditya," she said softly, the tip of her fingers gently touching my back.

I couldn't sleep.

Not because I couldn't stop thinking about everything that happened, but because my stomach had started to act up. I sat straight, holding it gently as though that'll make the ache go away. It was horrible. Like my intestines had formed a tight knot and then stretched themselves to the opposite ends. The feeling would last for a few minutes before disappearing and then come back again after a short pause.

I decided to use the washroom.

Fifteen minutes later when I was done, the relief lasted for about twenty minutes before the feeling returned.

I sat on the couch, shrinking into myself with my stomach cradled in my hands.

More than mental, stress affects my physical health. This was without a doubt the result of overloading.

I had to use the washroom again.

I was completely drained by the time I exited the bathroom. Exhausted, I sat on the couch, sweating in the cold night. This was intolerable.

"Priya," I croaked out. "Priya."

She stirred, reaching out in the dark to feel me. I sighed.

"Jaan, idhar," I panted harshly, my lips drier than sahara. Fuck, I need liquids.

She got up disoriented, spotting me in the dull light of the lamp. I heard her before I felt her come to me.

"Aditya, are you okay?" She sat on my side, leaning into me worriedly.

I shook my head. "I've been to the washroom twice now. And I think I need to use it again. But I can't get up." I said, embarrassed to the core. I thought this will be my state after a half-century into the marriage, not half a month.

"Loose motions ho gaye? (Are you having loose motions?)" She wrapped an arm around my shoulder and helped me get up. "Is it because of the biryani?"

Yeah, that must have played its part too, though stress is the main culprit.

"Maybe," I lied, trying not to put all of my weight on her petite body. I can't afford both of us collapsing to the floor. She led me inside the bathroom and turned on the lights. "Thanks, I'll manage now," I whispered, ushering her out.

She left quickly and closed the door after her.

I groaned. Can my life get any more embarrassing? Just kill me at this point.

After I was done, my knees almost buckled when I attempted to get up. Dragging myself to the basin, I pumped out the handwash and washed my hands before taking the support of the walls to leave the bathroom.

She was waiting for me just outside.

Her arm went around my waist immediately, holding me up while my arm wrapped around her shoulders.

I sat down on the couch with her help.

"Maine yeh nimboo paani laya hai. Aapki mom dawaiya la rahi hai, tab tak aap yeh peejiye. (I brought you lemon water. Your mom's bringing the medicine, have this in the meanwhile.)" She urged softly.

I forced my head off the headrest and took the glass from her, drinking the lemon water until the glass was empty.

Mom arrived not a second later.

Priya left my side to give her space. She popped out a few pills and shoved them into my mouth before putting the glass of water to my lips. I swallowed them.

"Kuch galat khaya kya bahar? (Did you eat something odd outside?)" She asked Priya.

"Nahi. Bas inke dost ke Ghar biryani aur ice cream. Aur ha, yaha aane ke baad, kulfi. (No. Just biryani and ice cream at his friend's house. Oh and, kulfi when we drove back here.)" She answered deftly.

"Were you still thinking about what Meghna said?" Mom cupped my cheek worriedly.

I brushed her hand away, sour about her behaviour towards me and Priya she had been practicing since my wedding.

"Gussa hai mujhse? (Are you angry at me?)" Her voice wavered.

I chose not to answer.

"I'm sorry." She whispered, her voice thick with emotions. "Galti ho gayi. (I made a mistake.)" She added, rubbing my arm gently. "I'm really sorry, Priya." She apologized to Priya, surprising me.

"Nahi, aap mat sorry- (No, please don't say sorry-)"

"No, I deserve to. I had been acting very harsh towards you. And for no mistake of yours. I just- I couldn't digest the fact that Ma accepted you so easily. I was trying to find faults in you to reassure my insecurities." She mumbled. "Par agar meri vajah se mera beta Ghar chodne ka faisla kar raha hai toh mein khud ko kabhi maaf nahi kar paungi. (But if my son's deciding to move out because of me, I'll never be able to forgive myself.)" She laid her forehead on my arm. "Iski yeh haalat ke liye Meghna ke saath saath mein bhi jimmedar hoon. (Along with Meghna, I'm too responsible for this condition.)" She kissed the back of my hand. "Yeh jyada stress nahi sehen kar paata. (He can't handle too much stress.)" Great, reveal all my weaknesses to my newly wedded wife.

"Oh," Priya sat to my right, placing a comforting hand on my knee.

"I'm not on my death bed for God's sake!" I grunted, startling the two women.

"Are you okay?" Mom asked worriedly.

"Do you need to use the washroom again?" Priya inquired.

"Take me to bed. I'm feeling sleepy." They responded eagerly, helping me to my feet and guiding me towards my side of the bed. I laid down, pulling the duvet that was draped over me before turning to the side and closing my eyes.

Sleep came to me easily.

The next morning, Tweety's incessant chirping stirred me awake.

"Tweety, shh!" I heard Priya hiss. Tweety still chirped, and Priya hushed her once more. Tweety did it again, as though testing Priya's patience and Priya threatened to turn on the ceiling fan. That shut the devil up real quick. "He is not feeling well, okay." She whispered to the bird. "Tumhein accha lagega agar mein aise tumhare kamre mein chali aayi aur tumhare bimar pati ki neend todi? Huh? (Will you like it if I come into your room and break your ill husband's sleep? Huh?)" She chastised softly.

I smiled in my half-asleep state.

Pulling the duvet to cover my head, I hugged the pillow tighter and tried to slip back into the deep slumber. My attempt proved as a failure when a knock on the door resonated out of the blue. Priya hurriedly rushed to open it.

"Good morning, Beta," I heard mom say.

Beta!?

"Go-Good morning," even Priya was taken aback.

"So raha hai kya woh? (Is he still sleeping?)" She asked softly.

"Yeah, do you want me to wake him up?" Priya inquired.

Absolutely no.

I hate this thing. People consider consent in everything but sleep.

"No no, let him sleep." Mom denied the idea quickly. "I brought this actually. Kaadha hai. Ajvain aur jeere ka. Usse de dena jab woh uth jaye. (It's a Kadha made of Ajvain and Jeera. Give it to him after he wakes up.)" She said in a small voice.

Maine ab saat janam tak nahi uthna hai. (I'm not waking up for seven lives now.)

"Thoda naatak karega, par tum pila dena. (He'll throw some tantrums, but you make him drink it.)" She stated.

Geez, tell her my age as well in case she mistakes it after hearing your words.

"Aur tumhara breakfast mein yahaan laun- (And should I bring your breakfast here-)"

"No, that's not necessary. I'll have it with everyone else." Priya cut her off.

"Thik hai. Usse yad se de dena kadha.(Okay. Remember to make him drink the Kadha.)" She reminded her before leaving.

I heard the door close before Priya came to my side and placed the glass on the nightstand. Then she turned and left the room as well. I sighed in relief, finally having no disturbance to fall back asleep. It worked.

It was ten am when I next woke up. Lazing around the bed for a while, I sat up languidly, covering my face to hide the yawn breaking through my mouth.

Priya was at the desk, working with her earphones plugged in. I clicked my fingers to catch her attention. She looked at me in surprise before removing the earphones and coming to my side.

"How are you feeling now?"

I leaned in to rest my cheek against her shoulder.

"Much better."

She gently pushed me away to pick up the glass from the nightstand. I groaned, turning away from the disgusting liquid. I should have thrown it when I had the chance. Why am I so damn lazy!?

"This will help you feel better," she reasoned.

"No, meri jaan, you help me feel better," I said cheekily.

She blushed, rolling her eyes at me. "Drink this please."

I shook my head.

"Aditya, don't be a child c'mon!"

I clicked my tongue against the roof of my mouth, answering in a straightforward denial.

She sighed in exasperation.

"Aditya, please."

"Tumne saree nahi pehni aaj? (You didn't wear a saree today?)" I observed with a frown.

"Aap please, yeh peejiye. (Please drink this first.)" She tried to push the rim of glass towards my mouth.

I turned my head away, denying her any access.

"Go and wear a saree."

She looked at me in disapproval. "Are you a kid?"

"I'd be worried if a kid wanted to see a grown woman in a saree so desperately," I commented.

She sighed loudly. "You'll drink this once I wear a saree?"

I nodded.

She put the glass on the nightstand with a harsh thud and got up from the bed. I watched as she looked through the options before picking the pink one with the white blouse and heading inside the bathroom.

I waited patiently in anticipation.

A few minutes later, the door opened and she stepped out.

And what a damn sight in pink!

She walked up to me consciously, picking up the glass and holding it out to me. I drank the liquid all the while staring at her. She fidgeted under my constant stare. I rendered the glass empty and forwarded it back to her. She took it, saying, "I've turned on the geyser. Go and take a shower."

I hummed.

She went back to the desk, avoiding my eyes.

Deciding to relieve her of my presence for a while, I got off the bed to get ready for the day. The lukewarm water helped relax the knots in my muscles. Turning off the shower, I grabbed the towel from the hanger before realising I had forgotten to bring clothes with me.

Shit.

I'm not confident about her seeing my body but she has already seen it, even massaged some places, so I just decided to go out. She looked over the moment I stepped out and then quickly turned back around. I swallowed, making my way toward the cupboard to grab an outfit.

Priya was typing way more aggressively than necessary. I thought MacBooks are supposed to be aesthetic and quiet? She was doing a horrible job at flaunting it.

Putting on the shirt and joggers, I went to the shelf to pick the next book in the series.

Grabbing it off the collection, I gravitated in the direction of the bed to read it. We did our own things in pin-drop silence. Her furious typing finally calmed down, and that provided me with much-needed solitude to read in peace.

While reading quite an intimate scene between the leads, my eyes drifted towards Priya and the damn neckline of hers that was on full display. As if she was purposefully teasing me, her hand gently pulled her dark locks to the other side, revealing her back to me as well. My fingers around the book clenched.

She felt my eyes on her and her entire body stiffened.

"The sorted mass of untangled jet-black tresses, locked around my fingers like vines, how could I not feel trapped?" I answered in a low baritone, nervousness for the fragile moment rendering me weak from within.

She looked at me in a combination of confusion and surprise.

"You wanted to know," I shrugged.

She nodded, "it's beautiful."

I put the book aside and sat up facing her, leaning forward to grab the chair before pulling her towards me. She gasped.

"You're beautiful," my hands braced the handrest.

She fiddled with her wrist, unwilling to meet my eyes.

"Thank you," I whispered. She met my eyes in confusion. "For yesterday," I cupped her cheek and she let out a shuddering breath.

God, she drives me crazy with how reactive she is to my every touch.

"I- I did nothing though,"

I shook my head, lifting her hand in mine. "You did a lot."

She blushed. "You do too."

"So you were paying me back?" I narrowed my eyes at her, feigning disappointment.

She looked up hastily and shook her head. "No. That's not what I meant!"

"Then what did you mean?" I decided to continue teasing her.

"I- I meant-"

"What?"

"Stop teasing me!" Her lips pursed, eyes dulling up at me.

I chuckled. "Well, I don't know about you, but this is me paying you back for yesterday." I leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to her right cheek.

Her hand fled to cover her mouth as she looked at me in shock. I laughed and wheeled her chair back to the desk to resume my book reading.

It was way less intimate than the neck kiss I had given her a few days ago but look at my wife acting coy because of a peck on the cheek.

Her aggressive typing returned like a sequel of a movie and I chuckled under my breath.

Adorable.

You both are adorable! Geez, just kill me with this cuteness now!

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