XV —— wax wings

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          FIANNA'S WEEK OF REST comes to an end the following Saturday; she wakes up, thanking God that the Splinching wound on her stomach has since been reduced to an ugly red scar, and gets herself ready. Salome wrote to her the day before having heard the news, and said that she wanted to come and visit. But Fianna, worried that Salome would sniff out Hope's muggle blood, told her it'd be easier to meet in Hogsmeade when she's back at school. If I'm allowed to go into Hogsmeade anymore, Fianna had said in the letter she sent back. She hopes the Head Girl gets her some Brownie points, so she doesn't lose all freedom.

Fianna decides to take herself on a walk just after breakfast, walking through the fields she'd trudge through to see Remus on full moons. The early November weather has left the fields barren and muddy, so she wears her cherry-red wellies, her hands in her pockets as she wanders towards the lake.

Her parents moved them to this area because it's so empty, the closest cluster of houses being a hamlet a thirty minute drive from them. Because of this, the lake and fields are always deserted, not even hobbyist fishermen making the trek out to make use of the quiet lake. Fianna doesn't mind it, since nowadays she can turn into a swan and ignore the world for a while, without worrying about muggles seeing, but it does remind her, how much of her family's world has revolved around Remus' curse.

She loves her brother, truly, and she knows none of this is his fault — but the way she was told off for going to Grimmauld Place, when Remus got away with misbehaviour for years, has made her realise how differently they're treated. Thank God Fianna was some golden girl for years, because what would've happened then? Would she have been the family pariah, even if she would've been acting exactly like the Marauders? Would her parents have scolded her, whilst letting her brother get away with the same things?

And this is all because of a boy. A boy. Not even one she's actually dating, mind you. To her family, she started going out with a boy from a family they don't like, and all of a sudden, she's the devil child. How did that happen? How did she, Fianna Lupin, the girl Hogwarts was on its knees for last year, turn into this outcast? And the thing that annoys her the most is that she and Regulus are trying to make things better for everyone. But at the rate things are going, Fianna feels like the two of them will be dead from trying before anyone realises what they've done to help.

Fianna sits down on a rock next to the water, sighing. She remembers those six minutes she sat with the Sorting Hat on her head, debating between putting her in Gryffindor or Slytherin. Miserably, she wonders if this feeling of alienation would've been her entire adolescence, had she been put in Slytherin all of those years ago.

She knows there's no use in thinking about these possibilities, these random other timelines she could've been led down, but after almost a week of sitting on her own with her thoughts, too angry with her parents to want to spend time with them, she can't help but wonder. Fianna imagines a world where she was put in Slytherin. Would she have immediately become friends with Regulus? Sadistically, she imagines a world where she was the Sirius of her family, and Regulus her Remus. With her mother, she knows she still wouldn't agree with the Death Eaters, but the thought of that alternate reality feels so odd to her... The only comfort in it (and she begs you forgive her for how embarrassing this is) is the thought she would've known Regulus sooner.

Eventually, Fianna turns into her Animagus, slowly drifting through the lake. She thinks about that cave the Horcrux is hidden away in, and wishes they could figure out its whereabouts sooner rather than later. She can fly, as well — so she doubts it would be a difficult rescue mission.

But, part of her keeps on thinking about Horcruxes, and the apparent destruction they cause upon people's lives. Apparently, if you wear one, your thoughts quickly become twisted, your entire attitude towards life bitter and negative. With all of her and Regulus' focus on finding this Horcrux, she wonders if the reason it feels as though the world is starting to crumble around her, is the Horcrux's curse at play. It's probably just psychological, a weird placebo effect, but still... It's weird.

As she gets out of the lake, turning back into herself, she hears the cracking noise of someone Apparating. Fianna turns around, to find Remus standing in front of her.

"Hello," he says.

Fianna frowns. "Are you stalking me now?"

"No," he says. "Mum said you went for a walk, and I presumed you'd come here... I just didn't want to walk the entire way."

"So you're lazily stalking me," she says.

"I'm working smarter, not harder," he says with a shrug. "I just wanted to speak to you... about everything, before you go back."

"If you're here to convince me to break up with Regulus, you may as well leave," she tells her, crossing her arms.

Remus sighs. "You're so stubborn."

"I am a Gryffindor," she says.

"I wasn't going to — well, I was going to encourage it, but I wasn't going to do that. I don't know why Mum and Dad thought that would be a smart idea. Like any teenager would listen to that," he says, shaking his head. "Prongs told me about that engagement party you went to. And as pissed off I am with you for telling Mum and Dad about you being an Animagus... you're really starting to worry me, Fee. You're getting too close to the Death Eaters."

Fianna sighs. "I know. I didn't mean to..."

"So break up with him, and then it's over—"

"No."

"You're going to keep on running into this problem, Fee," says Remus, "Unless you break up with him."

Fianna sits down on one of the rocks next to the lake. "I thought you said you didn't come here to convince me to break up with him."

"I didn't," says Remus. "I just wanted to say that I'm getting worried about you — and I don't know how I can help you, but I'm going to try and get the Order's protection on you, and hopefully then—"

Her eyes widen. The thought of her being watched over by the Order of the Phoenix, when she's so close to Regulus, worries her. What if the Death Eaters notice and question it? What if they start investigating and realise her and Regulus' plan, to destroy Voldemort's Horcrux? Her stomach ties into knots. Somehow, this feels more dangerous than no protection at all... It puts Regulus in a certainly poisonous position, something that scares Fianna.

"You can't," says Fianna. "That might backfire on Regulus."

"Fee, can you not hear yourself—?"

"You don't understand," says Fianna, standing up. "I don't want to speak to you anymore if you're going to twist every conversation into why I should break up with Regulus."

There's a pause. Her big brother looks at her — down at her, thanks to their embarrassing height difference. She used to tell people that he took all of the tall genes in the womb, and left nothing for her. Remus would grin and then take food off of her plate.

But now, he looks at her, sad and disappointed. Fianna hates it, but she keeps on desperately telling herself, one day he'll understand! She wishes she could tell him now, but she knows the more people aware about what her and Regulus and doing, the more dangerous it becomes. So instead, Fianna swallows her pride, accepting the disappointed looks from her brother, her mum, her dad — hell, even Georgia.

"Do you love him?"

Fianna blinks. "What?"

"You heard," says Remus.

"No, I don't — it's only been a couple of months—?"

"Could you?"

Fianna stares at him in disbelief.

"Maybe," she says, and, regrettably, she means it.

"Right," says Remus. "I don't approve, but I'll stop telling you about that if you promise me something."

"Well, that depends on what the something is," says Fianna, frowning.

"Fuckin' hell, you've been around Slytherins for too long," says Remus, rolling his eyes. Fianna gives him a dirty look, but he continues, "I'll be quiet for now — but if you're still with him by the end of school, the Order's stepping in to protect you. He'll be a fully-fledged Death Eater by then, you've only gotten away with this so far because they can't step foot into that school. You'll be completely defenceless without the Order."

"OK," says Fianna. "Deal."

Remus smiles softly. "Thank you."

The two start walking back to their house, Remus mindlessly talking about him and Sirius' escapades the night before. Fianna thinks about their promise, for her to let the Order to step in come graduation. We might've destroyed the Horcrux by then, she thinks. Either that, or we might be dead.

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          REMUS TAKES FIANNA BACK to Hogwarts just after dinner. After an awkward conversation with Dumbledore about if she's feeling better, she walks back to Gryffindor Tower, excited mainly to see Georgia.

Fianna steps foot into the common room, and instantly, dozens of pairs of eyes land on her. She pauses for a moment, feeling like a deer caught in headlights. Does the entire house have nothing better to do, than to watch her? She wonders if they've been talking about her all week — if they've been whispering about Regulus in the hallways, saying, "I can't believe they snuck out of school together." She wonders how this has been on him, if people have been staring at him like some alien—

"Fee!"

Georgia appears in front of her, hugging her tightly.

"How are you feeling?" says Georgia.

"Uh, fine, really," says Fianna. "Can we go to our room? Everyone's—"

"Staring?" says Georgia. "Yeah, I know — it was like this on Sunday, too. Like someone had died, or something..."

They go upstairs, back to the comfort of their room. Fianna dumps her bag down on the floor, as Georgia sits down on one of their bean bags next to their mini fireplace.

"How was... everything, then?" says Georgia.

"Mum and Dad told me to break up with Regulus," says Fianna. "I said no, naturally... And I told them that Remus let me become an Animagus."

Georgia gasps. "Really?"

"Oh, yeah, but it didn't deflect any of the anger..." Fianna trails off for a minute, before she adds, "Regulus visited me as well, on Thursday. My parents don't know, 'course, but he appeared outside of my window..."

"You would've thought you were dead, you know, with how he was at the start of the week," says Georgia. "It was spooky. I've always thought he was a miserable bastard, but this week, it was even worse..."

Fianna snorts. "I'm sure it wasn't that bad... How's Prewett?"

"Oh, fine," says Georgia, shrugging.

Fianna frowns. "Has the honeymoon phase already worn off?"

"He's just... all over the place," says Georgia. "I've been going to the library with Pandora this week, and every time he shows up, it's like everything gets thrown off the tracks. He's so chaotic."

Fianna swallows. "Can I tell you something?"

But before she can, there's a knock at the door.

Prewett lets himself in, and smiles cheerily at Fianna.

"You're back! How are you feeling?"

"Um, fine, thanks..."

"I ran the first Duelling Club this week — I figured you would want it to go on without you, so I took the liberty of looking after it. But if you want it back, feel free..."

"Really?" says Fianna. "Remus hasn't mentioned it to me...?"

"Oh, because he didn't help," says Prewett.

"What? Just Salome did?"

"No, neither of them did," says Prewett.

Fianna blinks. "But that was the whole point, to make the club feel inclusive—!"

"Well, loads of people turned up and enjoyed themselves," says Prewett. "It's not my fault if Slytherins are setting themselves up to fail. At least we're giving ourselves an edge over our enemies one day, eh?"

Fianna turns to Georgia, furious.

"Prewett, come on," says Georgia.

"What?" says Prewett. "I thought you agreed—"

"Yeah, but I didn't agree with you hijacking Fee's idea," says Georgia. "Black's been more Head Boy than you these past few weeks."

That must've struck a nerve — Fianna wonders if it's because Prewett only got Head Boy because Regulus is a Death Eater — because Prewett swears and storms out, slamming the door behind him. Fianna looks at Georgia, surprised.

"What did I say?" says Georgia. "Chaos. One more of those outbursts, and I'm going to end things. I'm not his mother... What were you saying, anyway?"

Fianna shakes her head. If Georgia's that close to breaking up with him, there's no point in upsetting her about Prewett at the party. "Oh, it doesn't matter," she says. "I'm going to find Regulus, I'll see you later?"

Georgia nods. "Slytherin won the Quidditch game today, so your best bet is to try their common room."

"Christ," Fianna mutters.

Georgia snorts. "I know."

Fianna looks down at her outfit. "... I'll change first."

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          FIANNA'S NEVER BEEN TO the dungeons, nor a Slytherin party, so it took her some time to figure out something to wear. Eventually, she decided on the same jumper she'd been wearing all day, but with a mini skirt instead of her jeans. That way, she could pretend she'd been dressed like this all day, and she was just naturally that well-dressed. She could step into the Slytherin common room with an air of nonchalance, like oh, yeah, I'm just always this put together. Fall in love with me, Regulus Black.

She makes the walk to the dungeons, her heeled Mary Janes clicking against the stone floor. As she reaches the dungeons, she continues walking past the Potions classrooms, and further down the corridor, until finally, she reaches the entrance to the Slytherin common room, a great big door with a snake carved into the stone. Two gargoyles sit on either side; they both turn to her.

"Fianna Lupin," says the gargoyle on the left of the door.

"Hello," says Fianna, awkwardly. "Do you have a name?"

"Harold," says the left-side gargoyle. "That's my brother Henry."

"Hello," says Henry, the right-side gargoyle.

"Nice to meet you," says Fianna. "How do I get in?"

"We open the door," says Henry, plainly.

Fianna frowns. "There's no password?"

"Passwords can be spread, but trust cannot," says Harold. "And you are a friend of Slytherin, so you are graciously welcomed at any time."

"Oh, that's nice..." says Fianna. "Could you let me in, then?"

"Sure," says Henry.

The door then swings open, revealing the Slytherin common room. Fianna awkwardly smiles at the two gargoyles, before stepping inside.

It's both not and exactly what she expected the Slytherin common room to look like. She expected it to be dark and dingy, with dark-grey castle walls keeping the lake water outside. She expected snakes on everything, and old Gothic paintings and decorations, the entire common room looking as if it had been cooked up in Dracula's basement. And it does, but with the students inside, laughing and singing along to the wizard rock (ew), it seems a little less scary.

There's sofas dotted around, with ornate upholstery, and students happily chatting away with their friends. Windows look out to the Great Lake, a mystical murky green glow filling the entire room, brightened slightly by the great big candle-lit chandeliers hanging from the ceiling. A painting of Salazar Slytherin sits above the fireplace, with other paintings of famous wizards covering the rest of the room, reminding Slytherins of the greatness that came from their house. It's the complete opposite energy to Gryffindor, yes, but having seen Grimmauld Place and the Lestrange manor, she can understand why this place could feel homely to some.

"Fianna?"

Pandora weaves through the crowd to Fianna, pleasantly surprised by her arrival. She hugs Fianna lightly, and tells her, "I was hoping Georgia would come, but oh well. Are you looking for Reg?"

Fianna nods. "Yeah, have you seen him?"

"He hates these things, he'll be in his dorm room," says Pandora. "Shall I show you the way?"

"Yes, please," says Fianna.

Pandora leads Fianna away from the common room, and further into the depths of the Slytherin dungeons. They walk down a couple of corridors, before finally arriving in front of one door. "Mine's the one opposite — Slytherin's separated more by year than gender, because gender doesn't matter," says Pandora, with an aloof shrug. "If you need anything, I'll be back in the common room."

"Thank you," says Fianna, just as Pandora walks away.

Fianna turns to the door, and after a moment's hesitation, knocks.

Regulus opens it, surprised when he sees Fianna.

"What are you doing here?" he says.

Fianna gives him a funny look. "Well, those gargoyles said I'm a friend of Slytherin, so I'm not even breaking and entering."

Regulus steps to the side to let her into his dorm room. Like hers, there's two single beds, with trunks sat on the foot of each. There's a small fireplace (although she presumes it works via magic, considering they're underwater) and two desks, with a big green rug covering the majority of the stone floor.

"Who do you share with?" says Fianna.

"Oh, Crouch, although I'm sure he'll end up sleeping on one of those sofas with the way he drinks," says Regulus. "How are you feeling?"

"Fine," she says. "I only have a scar now, which is good... My brother's also agreed to stop telling me to break up with you, which I suppose is a plus."

Regulus snorts. "Well, mine wrote to me for the first time since he left home, telling me to stay away from you."

"Really?" says Fianna.

Regulus nods. "I'd show you, but I already put it in the fire," he says, and Fianna smiles softly. "The main gist, though, was that I was going to corrupt you if this continues any further, and if I had an ounce of decency, I'd spare you. I'm not sure what he thinks this relationship of ours is... He makes it seem as if I'm holding you against your will."

Fianna rolls her eyes. "You're not."

"I'm not?" says Regulus.

Fianna shakes her head, nervously scratching the side of her arm.

"I thought I was," he says, "Considering what you said the other night."

"What do you mean?" she says.

"You said we were friends," he says, quietly.

"Are we not?" says Fianna, with a frown. 

Regulus pulls a face, looking nervous. "I mean, we are, but—" He stops himself, as if wanting to try again. "Seeing you hurt the other day scared me... I didn't realise how much I cared for you. I care about you more than a friend should."

Fianna stares at him in disbelief, surprised he's even saying this. She didn't think Regulus felt emotions until recently. He was always drifting through school, looking unimpressed with life. She's always felt sorry for him, since Sirius had told her what his parents were like, but to be standing in front of Regulus, her heart swelling because he likes her back...

"I feel the same," says Fianna.

"You do?" he says.

Fianna nods.

He steps closer to her, slowly intertwining his fingers with hers. Fianna looks up at him, and he smiles softly back.

"You're so beautiful," he says.

Fianna smiles. "I try."

He grins back at her, letting go of her hands to hold her face. Slowly, he leans in towards her, kissing her. He touches her carefully, a stark contrast to when they kissed on the train a couple of months ago; this time, there's a tenderness about it, a build-up of weeks of pining.

Fianna pulls apart from Regulus to grasp onto his hands, releasing them from their grip on her face. Instead, she places them on her hips; he looks surprised at her, as she snakes her arms around his neck, their chests pressed tightly against each other.

"I wanted to be closer to you," she says simply, before kissing him again.

She doesn't know where that came from — considering her first kiss was with him, two months ago — but she likes the closeness, her skin against his. Fianna feels Regulus' hands on her back, moving further and further down...

"Fuck, I'm so sorry, Reg!"

Fianna and Regulus pull apart, Crouch standing in the now-open of the dorm room, a glass of Firewhiskey in one hand. Fianna looks down, and quickly pulls her mini skirt back down. She didn't realise Regulus had been that handsy.

"Um, did you need something?" says Regulus.

"No, uh, I was just gonna use our bathroom..."

Fianna turns to Regulus, shocked.

"You lot have ensuites?" she says.

"Yeah, we're not peasants," says Regulus, shrugging.

Fianna scoffs. "Gryffindor makes us share."

"You should've joined Slytherin, then," he says, lightly nudging her with his elbow.

Crouch rolls her eyes. "I'm just gonna use Panda's. How didn't you know that, though?"

"I haven't been here before," says Fianna.

"We're not that scary, see?" says Crouch, with a drunken smile, before he turns to Regulus. "Put a sock on the door next time Reg, yeah?"

Regulus nods. "Will do, yeah..."

Crouch closes the door, the music and laughter from the party becoming muffled again. Fianna crosses her arms, awkwardly glancing at Regulus. He sits down on his bed.

"I don't want to do anything yet," she says quietly, worrying that the bed means something.

Regulus looks up at her. "I wasn't expecting anything," he says, reaching his hands out for hers. "Sit next to me?"

She does so, resting her head on his shoulder. Regulus puts an arm around her, his head resting against the top of hers.

Fianna closes her eyes. "You're such a softie."

"Only with you, Fee," he murmurs back.

i love them so much

i'm gonna be honest, writing the past couple of chapters i've reached points where a kiss felt natural but it felt too soon, and i was worried that it was going too fast. but there's so much that needs to progress before we get to the horcrux in the cave situation (which is my planned ending for this fic) and i think holding off on the kiss for any longer would be a detriment to that? so yeah lol fee x reg 4ever (or at least until the cave hahaah)

let me know what you thought, and i hope you enjoyed!! thank u for reading<33333