Julia

"Is she alright?!"

They barely cleaned her up before laying her in my arms and I sobbed.

I sobbed because I never knew love until that moment with my daughter.

She looked so much like Jagger with a head full of dark hair.

"She's...she's...everything.." I whispered as Jagger rubbed her little chin with his thumb.

"Jubilee Jane Bennett-Hayes.." he said, "Welcome to the world, Peppercorn.."

I laughed, yawning in between cradling my child and being loved on by my husband.

"Pictures?"

Jagger closed his eyes and frowned, "I forgot...Oh my God..I am so sorry."

"No," I said, "We can take them now. I'm not mad at all—we kinda had a rush!"

At 8 pounds, 12 oz and 21 inches long, our girl was perfect. She had a little jaundice, but that was easily remedied within the hour.

"Jagger, she has your eyes..they might change colors, too."

The almond shaped dark eyes had a hint of blue in them and I wondered if baby's eyes changed colors.

"My Mom's does," Jagger said, "She has blue, but sometimes they're hazel. Same with me."

"My...I wonder.."

He nodded, knowingly.

This was something I wish I could share with my own mother—my real mother.

A mother who abandoned me.

I would never abandon my daughter.

Jagger

"I can't sing to save my life, but I love to sing to her."

Julia smiled, "She enjoys it. You've calmed her down twice now with your crooning."

"Maybe I'm the next Sting."

"I wouldn't go that far," Julia teased, "I can't wait until we get her home."

We'd decided to spend the next few hours getting to know her—our beautiful bundle of joy.

"Are you my little princess?" I rocked Jubilee in the rocking chair meant for mothers and their newborns, but Julia had passed out after the last feeding.

I had Moose bring up some pizza for us, but he didn't see Jubilee even though he wanted to.

"I think your mom and sisters should see her first—maybe your dad."

I nodded—my best friend knew us so well.

"I love you, Jubi..." I said, "I want to be the best dad—the best man—for you. I want you to be happy, healthy and..I can't believe you're real."

The nurses came in and out to check on us, including Doctor Jean and our original OBGYN, plus nurse Jayne.

"What a sweetheart," Jayne said, "You're going to be amazing parents, Jagger. Don't hesitate to call."

"Thank you," I said, "We're ready to get home."

"I am sure you are," she said, "I think they're going to be discharging you soon."

With papers in hand, Julia in a wheelchair with our swaddled baby in her arms and me behind her at the reins, I made sure they knew I had a car seat and everything Jubilee needed.

"Congratulations," the discharge nurse waved as did Lula, who led us out to my car.

"We're finally going home," I said, "Are you ready for this, sugar?"

"I am more than ready, spice. Let's go home."

Julia

The flowers and cards were already piled up in the house when we got there.

I had received a million text messages from people ranging from my friends to peers to employers to professors..

Jagger endured the same thing, but we were so blessed beyond measure—beyond anything we could ever imagine.

We had just passed the end of the year at school and both of us were ecstatic to be able to focus more on Jubilee and the life we were making for her and ourselves.

We spent a week or so at home—just the three of us—with video calls and messages from our loved ones. The next month we were planning on having visitors so Jubilee could meet everyone.

"I want to take you on a honeymoon still."

"I know," I said, changing Jubilee's diaper, "One day, we will."

"How's your...did you.."

"He called, yes.." I admitted, "All he said was congratulations and I said thank you and then we hung up. I think he'll come around, but Kyle is stubborn."

"He's an asshole."

"He...yes, he is," I sighed, "But he's my brother and even though she isn't allowed to see him for some time, I will have contact. I know he meant well."

"Do you really believe that?"

I turned to face Jagger, holding our daughter in my arms, "Yes. Kyle has done so many things for me, Jagger, but he messed up with this one. I don't think he was going to take her away forever."

"Adoption IS forever, Julia," Jagger shook his head, "I can't take any chances. I barely know him, but he's yet to make a good impression on me. Now I understand what people meant when they thought my dad was a dick.."

His phone buzzed as I placed Jubilee in her crib so I could stretch.

"What do you mean? When?!"

I looked at Jagger's whose face had turned a ghostly pale.

"Where? At General?! Is he,-are we,-Mom!"

"What?" I mouthed, "What is it?"

"I'll be right there..Yes..yes...maybe just me..I can't take Jubilee out.."

Jagger was shaking as I touched his arm, "Spice.."

He looked up at me and then to Jubilee, his eyes turning that same shade whenever he was going into an attack.

"Come back.." I told him, "What is it?"

"It's Dad.." he choked, "He's in the hospital."

"What for? Is he sick? Did he,-"

"He shot himself."