49│Abandoned
AUTHOR'S NOTE:
It's been awhile I guess? Hehe sorry for not updating this fanfic. I really want to finish this actually (The first season for this fanfic) but suddenly I just lost my motivation to update and to write this fanfic.
But while re-read my own fanfic, I suddenly felt guilty? I mean I really love Axel! Omg he's my baby! So now, welcome back to me I guess? But I dunno. Maybe I'll lose my motivation again! But hopefully not!
Haha. Thank you for 135K reads omg!
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Axel's Point of View
WHILE CLASS D DEALT WITH ITS OWN PROBLEMS, the second-and third-year students' cavalry battle proceeded. Horikita kept staring at her brother, whom she couldn't approach.
I crossed my arms and looked at Kiyotaka, who's also looking at her. Maybe we're thinking the same thing? Heh.
Sudou didn't return to camp even after the cavalry battles ended and the final event, the 200-meter dash, began. The school will continue on with the contest, paying no mind even if one or two students happened to be absent. The absentees will simply be disqualified and will not be able to obtain points. The rules were clear.
Beneath us, Ryuuen approached.
"Hirata, what happened to Sudou?" Perhaps Ryuuen had been observing Class D from a distance, but he spoke as though he were there close by when everything went down.
"Something came up and Sudou-kun's taking a break. He'll be back soon." Hirata replied.
"Kuku. I don't think you should be saying baseless things like that." Having his name called for the second race, Ryuen entered the course.
"You've taken first place in all the individual competitions so far, right, Ryuen-kun?" Behind his back, Hirata called out to him while silently displaying his fighting spirit.
"What's wrong with that?"
"In terms of the participants this time, you're likely to take first place. It appears Ryuen-kun's quite lucky."
"Heh. Luck's on my side after all."
"I don't know how much longer your luck will last, though. Anything can change." Hirata said while looking at the field.
"Huh?"
"What I mean by that is I know what you're thinking." Ryuen laughed scornfully as though saying he had no idea what he's talking about. Hirata then continued.
I yawned, actually their conversation was boring. I might sleep while standing if they continue their conversation.
"The fact that you've obtained the list on Class D's participation table as well as the fact that you know the physical abilities of Class D's students in detail too. And I also understand that you intend to make use of that. We're not idiots. We have a few tricks hidden up our sleeves." Hirata argue.
"Ooh. I'd be scared if that weren't such an obvious bluff. Look at how far apart Classes C and D are now. Doesn't it fill you with despair? Regardless of whether you knew the truth or not, you should've at least tried to trick us."
"I just have one thing to say to you. Before the day ends, I'm going to show you something interesting." Hirata remarks, making Ryuen smirked.
"Something interesting? Then I'll be waiting in anticipation." Ryuen didn't sound fazed in the slightest. He probably had no reason to be, considering that he went on to handily take first place in the 200-meter dash.
"So there's a little over an hour until Sudou's next match, huh?" Kiyotaka said, making me nod at his remarks.
The dash continued for the second-and third-year students, followed by a fifty-minute break. If Sudou fails to return by then, it'll be a checkmate. With our ace gone missing, there's no winning chance for our class.
There's only one person in this class capable of forcing him into action.
Horikita or by myself.
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Kiyotaka's Point of View
"AH LET ME REST! I DON'T WANT TO MOVE ANYMORE! Look, my legs are shaking!" Axel remarks making me slightly chuckle.
"Stop overacting." I said to Axel who just pouted his lips and looked away. Well his legs are literally shaking. I just nodded my head and ruffled his soft hair, my heart skipped a beat.
Damn.
I'm not really used to these feelings.
Let's just finish this festival and claim my prize, which is the person in front of me.
I shook my head at our ealy conversation with Axel. After I placed third in the 200-meter dash, I waited for Horikita to finish her own race. I wondered if Horikita understood just how vital her role was.
"Horikita. Do you understand the gist of Sudou's situation?" I asked.
"His leadership was questioned and he came to realize what a disappointment he is before running away." she replied. Axel notices our conversation and goes to our location.
"Roughly speaking. That's true." I said.
"And? You're not going to ask me to bring back Sudou-kun, are you?" she glared at me. I just stared at her and Axel just crossed his arm.
"If you know what w'ere thinking, then don't ask unnecessary questions." Axel said to her.
"I don't get it. There are other people you could rely on. There's no way I could possibly bring him back, right?"
Is she seriously saying that? She hasn't realized at all yet that she's the reason why Sudou's trying so hard in these sport festivals.
"Besides, I'm not exactly in a position where I can worry about the others." When she said that, she looked at Axel who liked asking for help. Axel's eyes widened.
"I know you're thinking but please, I'm already exhausted and you know my way? I can just drag him here again or you can talk to him nicely." Axel replies, I just shrugging my shoulders.
We know that Horikita is suffering but we also understand her feelings. Besides, pretty much no one wanted to go find Sudou except my Axel. They'd abandoned Sudou, although they knew that he could save us in the sports festival. Everyone's trust in him had evaporated.
Well, it's time for me to play the role of a bad guy now. Axel should pay me with this.
"You know what? You cannot take care of your classmates, you cannot take care of yourself, what are you even worth then? You're just a burden."
Her eyes widened when I gave her the deepest cut. Axel who was listening smirked but hid his devilish smirk. Praise me later.
"W-What are you saying? I'm sorry I got hurt, but I had bad luck. Aren't there things you just can't do anything about?"
"Bad luck? So you don't see your injury, as well as Class D's current state, as anything more than a coincidence. Proof that you haven't realized anything." She clenched her fists as she's trying to refute back.
"Don't mock me. Of course I understand the seriousness of the situation. The information on the participation table's list had been leaked to Ryuen-kun. And the fact that the fault lies with a traitor from within the class. But it can't be helped, right?"
"What else have you noticed?" I continued speaking in a cold tone and expressionless face.
"What else? I don't know the details of it, but Ryuen-kun provoked Sudou-kun?" she asked, and I nod my head.
"That's right. He attempted to thoroughly crush Sudou, the key player of our class. No matter how much information he's obtained, Sudou's still invincible as far as individual competitions go and he's a powerful presence in the team competitions as well. So, Ryuuen needled and provoked him on purpose, until he got Sudou to drop out."
Sudou ceased to be an asset and because of his rampage, Class D's morale plummeted.
"Yes. That's why we're in this current situation." she agreed.
"Anything else you had noticed?" I asked again.
"Wait, you can't mean... You want to speculate?" I gave her a silent response.
"Yes, I certainly do. I guess he told Kinoshita-san to trip me. But it's hard to blatantly, deliberately cause injury—" she said but I cut her off. If I felt like it, I could have offered her evidence that it was indeed intentional. But that's not important. And instead, I said.
"How long do you intend on being useless, Horikita?" Unless I took drastic measures, Horikita Suzune would never wake up.
Finally, she snapped and yelled back.
"What's the matter with you!? You should offer to help instead of adding insult to injury. Axel! And You I thought you two are my—"
"That doesn't matter. I called you useless because you are useless."
"How dare you!? I'm confident that in both written exams and physical abilities, I'm superior to those worthless people over there. In the first place, since the information leaked, isn't it already too late? Not just me, but just about anyone would be left unable to do anything in this situation. Would you mind giving some basis?"
I was unfazed by her outburst and continued replying in a cold tone.
"If you were an ordinary student, it would be fine for you to say that. But that's not the case, is it? If you're aiming for Class A and intend to raise your comrades up to the same then it's about time I tell you about the necessity of cultivating a mindset that can see the bigger picture."
"That's why I'm telling you to show your basis!"
The classmates around us turned to look for a moment to see what's going on. Axel looked at them and smiled while putting his fingers in his lips to not to interfere, and they listened.
"'The information on the participation table's list had been leaked', 'Ryuen provoked Sudou', 'It might have been that the injury was intentionally caused'." I summarized Horikita's words and threw it back to her.
"Certainly, just like you said, it's a situation where you cannot do anything about it. Why— Because you didn't do anything about it. And as long as you don't do anything about it, it'll continue on forever. Do you intend to complain again when Ryuen pulls something off brilliantly once more?"
"That's... But, I..."
"You can either prioritize improving your own ranking while Sudou remains absent, or you can let your ranking plummet while Sudou returns and helps pull the class forward. Which of those best serves Class D?"
She opened her mouth but no answer came out from her.
"It's a rhetorical question. You aren't nearly as valuable as Sudou right now. Get a hint already that you're an absolutely useless student. Sudou's methods are clumsy but he's contributed more during this sports festival than anyone else. And he had been eagerly trying to win. Is it really okay for you to give up on him just because you claim you can't afford to care about other people? You're going to let him sit this out?"
If I say this much, Horikita should be able to understand too. She needed to wake up.
Wake.up.Horikita.Suzune.
"It's something obvious even an elementary school student should be able to answer right? That this one act would lead to the start of our counterattack."
Ryuen strategically crushed Sudou. Then all we have to do is strategically call Sudou back. It's a simple matter.
" If you're aiming for Class A, there's a limit to how much you can do on your own. As a matter of fact, right now you're in a situation where you cannot do anything on your own. You'll surely encounter more and more of such exams. At such a time, the man known as Sudou Ken will definitely become a valuable asset. In order to make use of it, what is it that you ought to be prioritizing right now? Is it to pray that your injuries heal here? That's not it, right?"
"I-I.."
"We're leaving, I'll let you think about it." When I said that, I grabbed his hand and started walking away. Axel waves his hand to Horikita while smiling.
The sports festival's outcome now depends on you, Horikita.
And right now, what Horikita needs is defeat.
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Horikita's Point of View
I HEADED TOWARDS THE INFIRMARY INSIDE THE SCHOOL ALONE, feeling a sense of loss after Ayanokoji-kun said all those things to me. But he was right.
Either way, what I ought to be doing right now is to do something about this leg of mine that I can't move the way I want. Treatment is necessary if I am to go after Sudou-kun. There were emergency first aid personnel stationed on the grounds but wanting to avoid standing out to the best of my ability, I had chosen the infirmary inside the school.
When I got to the infirmary, I saw that someone else was already there. Of the three available beds, one was curtained off. I couldn't see who was in it.
"How's my condition, sensei?"
During the intermission before the lunch break, I had the emergency first aid personnel apply taping but its effects were minimal. After inspecting my leg, the nurse looked up.
"I've said this earlier too but participating in any further competition will be difficult."
Although it was diagnosed as a sprain, it's neither getting worse nor better. Currently I'm capable of barely running. But at the very most, I can only manage running. I cannot muster up the strength needed to win in a contest.
"Do you still plan to take part in the recommended-participant events?"
"I was planning to. But I think I'll be bidding farewell to any participation. Because I can see if I participate with my leg in this condition, I'll only be a liability for the class."
"That is a wise decision."
Fortunately, I have a great sum of points I obtained from earlier exams. Even if I abstained, by paying compensation, I can make up for it. That was no small expense, but if it would raise our class's chances of victory even a little, then I had to pay it.
My dream of running alongside my brother would end, though.
At this point, fretting over personal matters like that is meaningless. The important thing is who to entrust the substitute role to.
"Thank you very much."
Having received treatment, I gave my thanks and left the infirmary behind. I headed towards the main entrance so as to return to the grounds.
In the window, I saw my limping reflection. Feeling pathetic, I bit my lip.
I tried my hardest to appear calm and collected, so that others wouldn't notice my pain. When I was just about to go back outside, Kushida-san ran up to me in a panic.
"I'm glad I was able to find you, Horikita-san. Umm, there's something I'd like to talk about."
"What is it? I have business to attend to later so I'd like you to keep it short."
After Kushida-san looked around, she whispered in my ear.
"Umm... you see, it seems Kinoshita-san, who ran into you and collapsed, suffered a serious injury. Right now, it looks like it's bad enough that she can't even get up, that's why... Well, Kinoshita-san wants to talk to you, Horikita-san."
Hearing those words, I couldn't conceal my surprise. Certainly she did seem injured but to think such a thing happened.
"Where is she?" After I asked that, she said 'This way.' and led me in the direction of the infirmary.
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WHEN I RETURNED ONCE AGAIN TO THE INFIRMARY, Chabashira-sensei was there inside the room. The nurse in charge of the infirmary opened her mouth.
"Good. I was just saying that you'd barely missed Horikita-san."
"I sent Kushida to go call you but it looks like she found you right away." Standing beside me, Kushida-san was listening in on the teachers' conversation with a slightly uneasy look.
"What is this about?"
From the bed walled off by the curtain I saw earlier, I could hear a girl's sobbing. Chabashira-sensei parted the curtain slightly. Behind it was Kinoshita-san from Class C, who was lying on top of the bed. Immediately shutting the curtains again, I was called out into the corridor.
"Kinoshita fell on the obstacle course this morning. Do you remember that?"
"Of course. She bumped into me." That incident ended up throwing a wrench into my sports festival.
"Well, Kinoshita says that you deliberately knocked her down, Horikita."
"Wait, what? It was completely by accident."
I'd been about to say that it was part of Ryuen-kun's strategy, as Ayanokoji stated. I believed that Ayanokoji was completely right, but we had no proof.
"I'd like to believe that as well but the situation isn't looking good. Kinoshita has testified that during the middle of the race, you kept on repeatedly looking back at her. For verification, we checked the video footage and you indeed checked Kinoshita's position twice."
"That's because she's the one who repeatedly called out my name. That's why I looked back."
"However, even if that happens to be the case, there's still a huge problem. She said you forcefully kicked her in the shin. In fact, she was absent from all subsequent contests and when we had a teacher take a look at Kinoshita's injuries, they seemed to be pretty severe ones. They believe those were caused intentionally."
"It's also just as groundless if I claim the severe injuries were inflicted accidentally when we fell. I didn't do anything." I replied.
"I believe you're innocent, but as long as we have no proof one way or the other, we must consider the matter."
This whole thing's idiotic. If this drags on, the student council will hear of it. My brother would hear about the incident. He'd feel irritated and ashamed of his idiotic little sister. However, since I was innocent, I had no choice but to plead that innocence.
"If your purpose in calling me is to confirm the truth, then I have said it. I'll repeat, I didn't do anything. I have some business to attend to from now, so would you mind if I excuse myself?"
I needed to find Sudou-kun as quickly as possible and bring him back. As I turned my back, Chabashira-sensei called out to me from behind.
"Kinoshita won't accept that. She's saying she'll report this to the school. Judging from her testimony and the footage, it doesn't seem like we'll be able to close this case. Looking at it from her perspective, it's as though she had been forced into accepting this situation after all. It'll also put Class C through a tough time since they'd have lost Kinoshita. You do understand what this means, right?"
"It's a case of the Devil's Proof, isn't it?" Chabashira-sensei was saying that, if it was impossible to prove my innocence, I'd need to prepare myself.
At that moment, I heard the sound of footsteps in the hallway. That person made a beeline for the infirmary. Putting his hands in both pockets, he acted like he owned the place.
"Looks like things have gotten really serious."
"Ryuen-kun..." I mumbled.
Why was he here? Shaking away my confusion, I feigned calmness. But as though he had seen through it, he laughed sneeringly and stopped in front of us.
"I came here after Kinoshita asked for me. To think someone would have deliberately caused that injury of hers."
Saying that, he passed by us and entered the infirmary. We, too, followed him in a panic. Entering the infirmary, Ryuen brushed off the teacher's attempts at stopping him and opened the curtain veiling the bed in which Kinoshita-san is receiving treatment.
"Hey, Kinoshita. Are you all right? Looks like you've had a rough time." Seeing Ryuuen-kun, Kinoshita-san openly trembled in fear.
"I hear you've injured your leg? Show me."
He said that before he pulled Kinoshita-san's leg out from beneath the sheets. Under Ryuen-kun's hand was Kinoshita-san's painful-looking leg wrapped up in bandages.
"Sorry. I tried my best, but...my leg just won't listen. T-That's why— Argh!"
"Don't blame yourself, Kinoshita. I know you tried to participate in the three-legged race."
"We ran into each other by accident, Kinoshita-san. Why are you saying that I made you fall?" When I questioned her with a slight glare, Kinoshita-san averted her eyes. Ryuen-kun then stood in front of her.
"According to what Kinoshita's been saying, you fully intended on making her fall. You deliberately did it, didn't you?" he said while looking at me.
"Stop joking around. You think I'd do something like this?" I argued.
"You can never tell what someone will do. Besides, look at the facts. Kinoshita, who happens to be better than you at sports, sustained serious injuries and had to withdraw. Meanwhile, you continue taking part despite your injuries. I'm not supposed to find that suspicious?"
I understood all too well the significance of losing a teammate. But, after hearing the eloquent speech Ryuen had prepared, my doubts about him only grew. What did he stand to gain from having Kinoshita-san run into me, when she had a higher chance of winning the race to begin with?
No matter how hard I thought, I couldn't find any benefits in such an ineffective plan.
"What are you thinking about so quietly?" Ryuen-kun bends forward as though peering at me while keeping his hands inside his pocket.
I didn't reply.
"Well, even if we have our little back-and-forth it won't do us any good. Right, Kinoshita?" In the middle of it, Ryuen-kun forcefully urges Kinoshita-san to speak.
"Horikita-san... When I fell, you said...that I definitely wouldn't win." Kinoshita said to me.
"I said no such thing. Why are you lying?" I rebut.
"Horikita, you were only looking back during the incident with Kinoshita. Why exactly is that?" Chabashira-sensei said.
"I admit I was looking back. However, it's only because she called out my name many times over from behind me. At first, I ignored her. But clearly things seemed strange and so I looked back." I said.
"Is that so, Kinoshita?" This time, Chabashira-sensei asks Kinoshita-san rather than me.
"I never called you, not even once." When Chabashira-sensei tried to confirm it, rather than admit it, Kinoshita-san denied it.
"The person in question herself is denying it, sensei. Besides, even if Kinoshita happened to call Suzune's name, what's wrong with that? That doesn't constitute foul play. It was probably a cry of desperation, born from a desire to win." Ryuen-kun said.
This argument is going to be endless if this keeps up. There's no mistaking the fact that these two must have conspired together.
"Umm.... Kinoshita-san, Ryuen-kun. I think it's unfortunate that things turned out like this but I don't think Horikita-san is the type of person to deliberately injure her opponent like this."
Having listened to both sides, Kushida-san spoke up as though shielding me.
"What's done is done. She bumped into Kinoshita deliberately. It's an open-and-shut case. There's no room for any further debate, so let's report this to the higher-ups right away." Ryuen-kun said.
"That's... Would you let me talk things over a little more with Horikita-san, please?" Kushida-san begged Ryuen-kun as though making an appeal. I'd like to tell her that's an unnecessary concern but as for me, I'd rather not help out with anything that could cause this story to spread.
Even though I feel like I'm trapped in a spider's web right now, I can't help but struggle desperately.
Ryuen-kun seemed to be slightly in thought, then he made this proposal.
"I don't have time to leisurely talk this out. The recommended-participant competitions are coming up right after lunch. I'll be competing in those, so I'd like to finish this. But, I don't mind if we can strike a quick and easy deal."
"Strike a deal?" I asked.
"I'm talking about you shouldering any losses incurred by Kinoshita and Class C." he said.
"That's not funny, I don't even have to listen to this." If so, the amount of compensation to be paid won't be cheap. Besides, I'd end things on a bad note.
"Then we're done. You won't strike a deal but you're telling us to not report this to the bigwigs. That's too selfish of you, Suzune. This won't fly."
"Wait. What exactly should we do?" Kushida asked.
"At least one of you has a good grasp of things. Let's see. If you hand over a million points, I'll have Kinoshita withdraw her complaint. That way, we can prepare a substitute for the recommended-participant events, and Kinoshita will receive some incidental income. Simple, right?" he said and my eyes slightly widened.
"Don't be ridiculous. I haven't done anything. I don't need to hand a single point over."
"Then go ahead and prove that, Suzune. Lay it all out in black and white for us. We can prove that we aren't lying. Let's have the Student Council President-sama deliver his judgement."
Ryuen-kun knew about my relationship with the president, my older brother, and was provoking me. I absolutely couldn't do anything to trouble my brother. If the rumor spread that his little sister deliberately hurt someone, it would do immeasurable damage to his reputation.
It was a dirty trick, but there was no way out of it. The timing with which they'd sprung their trap. Not immediately after Kinoshita-san injured herself but rather the fact that they had her lie down made it seem more truthful. It means they did not file a complaint immediately after falling but challenged the next contest as well.
In other words, she tried to endure it, that she tried to bear with it made it seem more truthful. But ultimately unable to cope with the pain, she withdrew and afterwards, she quietly opened up about me having intentionally made her fall before feigning fear at further retribution from me.
Everything they'd done had been meant to trap me, as though they were weaving a net to catch me in.
The situation had already passed the point of no return. That it's a mistake I made the moment I decided to carefreely approach this sports festival.
The longer this went on, the worse things would get. But I couldn't break.
I had to choose. I could pursue the truth, disputing Ryuen-kun and his lackey's claims. Or I could compromise right here. I wanted to do the former, but I had no evidence to prove the truth. I would only be wasting time and everyone's trust.
I had to strike a deal with Ryuen-kun right here.
"Well, it seems that Suzune isn't going to make any compromises. Very well. Kinoshita, we're going to report this to the teachers, then to the student council."
While distorting her face in pain, Kinoshita-san raised her upper body.
"Wait..." That word clearly reached Ryuuen-kun. They stopped walking.
"If I pay you, you'll make it so this issue never happens, right?"
"So you're admitting that you committed foul play in order to win?" he said with a smirk in his lips.
"No, I'm not a liar. This time, your strategy beat mine. That's all."
"Well, did you hear that, Kinoshita? She doesn't think she's done anything wrong at all. Can you forgive her?"
"Absolutely not." Kinoshita replied.
He gave a devilish smile while manipulating the situation back and forth alone as though to play with my heart.
"Hehe. Well, then too bad. The same conditions won't apply now. If this is to be the second round of negotiations, then naturally the conditions will change."
Just how much did Ryuen-kun intend to torture me?
"How about you get down on your knees and beg? Maybe then my feelings, and Kinoshita's, will change."
"Ryuen. This is going too far." Chabashira-sensei said.
In response to Ryuen-kun, Chabashira-sensei, who had been a spectator, opened her mouth.
"Teachers should stay out of this. It's a problem between students." Ryuen-kun, who showed no fear even against teachers, said so as a follow up.
"Well, I won't force you to make a decision right away. A teacher's eye is also on us. That's why I'll hear your answer once the sports festival ends. Will you kneel before me and offer a million points, or will you let the school deliberate? Which will you choose?" he continued.
Then he added this as well.
"Don't think that this ends with the sports festival, either. I'm not done with you. Kushida, bring Suzune to me after the festival."
Saying that to Kushida-san, Ryuen-kun and Kinoshita-san both left the infirmary. Having been left behind, I stood while feeling a sense of loss.
"Are you okay? Horikita-san?" Kushida-san asked me with a worried voice.
"I'm fine. More importantly, how many minutes has it been. Sensei, how much longer is the lunch break?"
"It'll still be going on for about twenty minutes. You haven't eaten yet right? Better get it over with quickly." Chabasira-sensei said.
But I didn't have the time to sit down and eat now. I had to find Sudou-kun as soon as possible.
Hurriedly, I left the two of them behind as I left the infirmary.
I rushed through the entranceway and headed outside. Despite the pain in my leg, I ran everywhere, looking for Sudou-kun. I ran past my older brother and his secretary along the way. Honestly, I wanted to talk to him, but as a Class D disgrace, I didn't have the right. I cast my eyes downward and walked away in another direction. My brother wasn't going to stop for me, anyway.
When only ten minutes remained, I returned to the field. Maybe Sudou-kun had come back after all. Because he has always tried his best to take top place amongst our school year.
I prayed for that to be so.
─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚.───
THE AFTERNOON CONTEST SHOULD BE STARTING RIGHT about now on the school grounds. At last, I've found the red-haired student sitting on a sofa in the dorm's lobby.
"Sudou-kun."
I called out to him with a gentle voice so as to not startle him. Sudou-kun put some slight distance between us before turning back to look at me.
"H-Horikita."
The reason he's surprised by my appearance is probably because he simply didn't expect me to show up here.
"Why are you here? Don't tell me you came to persuade me to go back?"
"Do I look like the type to come all the way here to persuade you?"
"It... doesn't seem that way to me. Then why? Did you come here to scold me again?"
"I wonder. I'm also at a loss for words."
When I finally found Sudou-kun, I felt as though I couldn't say anything. I think back on why exactly I went to such lengths to look for him.
"If you withdraw, Class D will stand no chance."
"I suppose so. Matter of fact, aren't they in trouble right now?"
"Yes. We're at the very bottom of the rankings. To turn things around, we need to take first place in all the recommended-participant events. Even then, we won't make the top spot."
In our class, there are those who excel at sports much like Sudou-kun himself but overall, there are places where they prove themselves inferior to him in this sports festival.
"And after I carried everyone on my back. That Hirata..."
"He's not at fault simply for stopping your rampage. On the contrary, you should be grateful to him. If you had, by any chance, raised your hand against Ryuen-kun, you might've been disqualified from the sports festival itself."
"I just couldn't stand being on the losing side of it. What he did was against the rules."
"You may be a bit of a problem child, but you certainly gave it your all today."
Sudou hadn't acted like himself. That alone was a miracle. For his classmates' sake, he'd been as good a leader as he knew how to be. He was hot-headed, as usual, but at the root of that was a desire to win.
"That said, there's still a lot you need to work on. The fact that you're here alone right now is proof."
"What's it supposed to mean?"
"If you were someone people could trust in and rely on, then rather than me you would surely have a lot of classmates here instead. To convince you to come back."
Perhaps that angered Sudou-kun once again, he gave the table a light kick.
"That's the problem right there. You try to bully your way through Class D. The midterm exam, the incident with Class C. Snapping and going on a rampage this time around. It's because you keep doing things like that that no one will follow you."
"So you're seriously going to preach to me. Spare me, Horikita. I'm really pissed off. I do think I've done something bad but I can't hold myself back either. That's why it can't be helped right?"
"I thought you said you were going to carry everyone in the class?"
"I never said that in the first place. The other guys begged me to, right?"
"But even so, since you've accepted, there's a certain responsibility you bear."
"That's—" Sudou-kun does want to make things work, he wants to stay here at this school and contribute to the class. There had to be a reason he was the way he was. Unless I found the source of that problem, he would be trapped in an endless cycle.
Even if he wanted to be alone, I couldn't leave him. Right here and now, I would make myself understand him.
"During the events, I can tell just by looking at you that you hate losing when you're good at something. But is that all there is to it?"
If he simply doesn't wish to lose to anyone at sports, then it wasn't necessary for him to accept the role of leader. Sudou-kun shouldn't realize too that they'd struggle when it comes to team contests. Something else was going on here.
Sudou-kun appeared lost in thought for a moment, then replied.
"Maybe I just wanted to see how it felt for people to pay attention to me and give me some respect. I guess I wanted to show all the people who made fun of me. Pretty lame, right?"
Once he had regained his calm, he realized both his own desires and the fact that he abandoned them all without being able to fulfill them and he forcefully scratched his crimson dyed hair.
"And with this I'm also a complete pariah, huh? Well, that's fine. It just means I'll be going back to how it was like in middle school for me."
Listening to those words from Sudou-kun, I fell silent. Now then, I wonder if all my preaching will reach his heart.
I felt I had no right to reprimand him.
I'd always considered him beneath me, but now I felt as though that wasn't true.
Sudou-kun was clumsy, the type of person to act impulsively. He had a volatile personality. But, if I changed my perspective, I could see that he had also been fighting all alone. The fact that he'd had the courage to confront his loneliness meant he was far superior to me.
While feeling anxiety that my words won't reach him, I sincerely tried to squeeze out those words. I continued the conversation that was never my forte.
"You know, it's strange. My feelings are basically the same as yours."
"Huh? What do you mean?"
"The desire to be respected by someone. The desire to continue fighting on your own. I'm the same."
He and I are similar. In the sense that we both carry a certain contradiction yet continue fighting against that solitude.
" When I think back, there were signs. During the midterm exams, I felt irritated at the students who couldn't study, you included. I got angry when they couldn't do something so obvious. I didn't want to work with them at all. But in the sports festival, you performed impeccably. You did a lot to carry our unathletic classmates."
Academics and sports. Different as they were, the principles at the heart of both were the same. What I had felt towards Sudou-kun and the others in those days, Sudou-kun is strongly feeling that now.
"Then you understand my feelings. Right now, I want to be alone."
"And I truly, truly want to leave you be. But if we lose you now, Class D's defeat will be set in stone."
This isn't just about Sudou-kun's personal problems. It'll have a significant impact on the class's chances of victory.
"You abandoned the class, though, just like me. Right? So, you don't got any right to lecture me."
"No, I suppose not."
No matter what I said to him, he wouldn't respond. Perhaps I was incapable of getting him to open up. The bell rang, signalling the end of the lunch break. The signal that the afternoon contests will be starting. This confirms that Sudou-kun won't be making it in time for the scavenger hunt.
"Go back, Horikita."
"No. Not unless I bring you with me."
"Then do as you wish."
"I'll wait here. Forever."
"Do what you want."
The elevator door closes shut. Up until the very end, I did not avert my eyes from him.
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