I felt a bright light on my face, making it warm. I slowly opened my eyes, wanting to close them immediately. I turned over, and noticed that Sodapop must have left to do something, since he wasn't sleeping next to me.

I slowly took the covers off of myself, stepping out of bed. I stretched slightly, since I felt a pain in my shoulders. For some reason, I knew that today would be difficult.

I decided to quickly get dressed, throwing on a black t-shirt, with some blue jeans. I also greased my hair back slightly, feeling to bothered to fix it.

There was a knock on my door, right before Darry had stepped in.

His blue eyes looked sort of soft, and his brown hair laid softly against his forehead. He slowly walked farther into the room.

"Do you need anything?" I questioned, before I yawned. I felt drained.

"I just wanted to make sure you were up, that's all. Breakfast will be in a few minutes," he stated.

"Alright," I replied, watching him turn around, as he began to walk out.

Suddenly, he stopped.

"Ponyboy?" he questioned, now facing me again. His voice sounded smooth and calm.

"Yeah?" I said skeptically. I knew that there was something wrong in the tone of his voice.

"We need to talk about something later," he exclaimed. His eyebrows slightly furrowed, and then he left my room.

Panic began to rise inside of me. What had I done? Did he find out that sometimes I snuck out at night to go to the lot to see the stars with Johnny?

I gulped, the thought of Johnny made me sad all over again.

I quickly pushed him out of my head, walking downstairs for breakfast.

Soda and Steve were sitting down at the table, quietly discussing something, while Two Bit, Dally, and Johnny were no where to be found. I felt slightly happy by this, since I didn't feel like being confronted.

I walked over to the table where Steve and Sodapop sat, pulling up a chair. I got a quick glance, but nothing too concerning from either of them. A part of me was terrified because I was unsure of what was going to happen, or what might've been said.

I began to daydream, again.

I remembered how being in the train with Johnny felt, just the two of us, riding into the night. It was chilly, a certain crispness in the air, which resulted in Johnny laying his head on my shoulder, and wrapping his arms around me. I recalled how warm he felt, and how there were little puffs of air coming out of both of our mouths due to the frigid temperatures.

I was pulled out of my thoughts when I heard something interesting being said.

"I told you Sodapop, I don't want to go out with Evie tonight. Please, stop pestering!" said Steve, annoyance in his voice.

Sodapop clearly looked taken aback, unsure of what to say.

Steve gave me a look, giving me a slight smile.

From this, I assumed that Sodapop didn't know that Steve didn't love Evie, and never truly did. I felt bad for Steve, he looked so helpless against Sodapop's begging.

"Alright, I guess it'll just be Sandy and I then," Sodapop mumbled. I could tell that he was slightly displeased.

Steve grinned at me, happy that he had won the argument. I could smell a chocolate cake cooking, a sweet fragrance filling the air. My stomach made a noise, signaling that I was hungry. I wondered when Darry would be done making the cake.

As Sodapop and Steve continued to talk about multiple things, the time passed. Darry then set a cake down, and pulled up a chair next to me. The four of us started to eat, in a comfortable silence.

"So, do y'all have any plans today?" asked Darry.

"I do, Sandy and I are going down to the movies," said Sodapop. He smiled at the mention of Sandy.

"Alright, what about you Ponyboy?" questioned Darry. I felt like I could see him begging through his eyes for me to go and do something.

I simply shrugged my shoulders, telling him that I was unsure of what I was going to do today. He nodded back.

The four of us heard the screen door open, as Two Bit, Dally, and Johnny walked through the door.

Immediately, Two Bit grabbed a piece of chocolate cake, and sat down in front of the TV. Before I knew it, I could hear Mickey Mouse blasting. Dally had similar actions, since he too sat next to Two Bit, watching Mickey.

I looked at Johnny quickly, whose eyes were on me. I felt almost uncomfortable by his stare, but also a bit scared. He was silent, unsure of what to say to me.

"Hey yo Johnny, what're you doing?" yelled Dally.

I couldn't help but chuckle at him, the tone of his voice was comedic. Apparently, the other guys must have agreed with me, because they too laughed.

"Nothing Dal, why?" replied Johnny.

"Well, it looks to me that you're eyeing Ponyboy. Any particular reason?" asked Dally with a smirk.

I glanced up at Johnny, and saw him look down. There was something off about his face though, until it hit me.

His cheeks were turning a bright red, and blush was crawling up his face. I smiled eternally, hoping that this would be a sign for something.

"Oh shut up Dal, you know I'm not a queer!" yelled Johnny. Everyone around him stared at him, their eyes wide.

"I never said you were," said Dally, his voice almost flat at the sudden outburst.

"Well, unless it's for me, isn't that right, Johnny," laughed Two Bit.

Everyone laughed, but Johnny stormed out of the house quicker than you could imagine. At that moment, Dallas Winston knew he had fucked up big time.

I suddenly chimed in saying, "I'll go talk to him."

Everyone nodded, and resumed their usual activities as I left the house looking for Johnny. It only took me a few steps to find him.

Johnny was sitting in the lot, wrapping his denim jacket around him tightly. The wind slightly tossed his hair around, and I could tell that he was shivering. I decided to sit down next to him.

"What's wrong, Johnnycakes?" I whispered. He put his head on my chest, and took his hands in mine.

I felt a burning sensation, like fireworks where he touched me.

"I'm angry. I feel like everyone is treating me differently. I'm not a queer!" he said, a harshness in his voice.

I could feel my hopes dropping.

"I like girls! I really do. Did you know that tonight I have a date with Angela?" he exclaimed.

"I'm sorry, who?" I replied, choking back a sob. I was really squeezing his hands now.

"Angela Sheppard, Tim and Curly's sister. I'm taking her out to see the new Paul Newman tonight," he answered. I could hear the excitement in his voice.

"I thought we were going to go see that movie together?" I said, trying to stay calm.

Johnny and I always went to the movies together. He didn't always understand what was going on, but he knew that I loved them, so he would take me. After we were done, we might go to the Dingo and grab something to eat, and then watch the sunset.

I guess that was all over now.

"I'm sorry Ponyboy, but Angela wanted to see it. I didn't want to say no to her. Maybe we can catch a movie next time," he said.

I nodded at him, trying to keep my feelings to myself. I tried to appreciate his head on my chest again, as I looked down at him, his tan skin and flushed cheeks.

Some time passed, just the two of us laying there together. I wanted this moment to last forever. But, unfortunately, it wouldn't.

"I have to go now, see you Ponyboy. I'll tell you about my date with Angela tomorrow," he said in a rush as he began to leave me.

I nodded, and got on my feet, quickly walking home.

-

When I got home, I went straight to my room, as I began to cry. I couldn't take the feelings I had for Johnny after I found out he was going to take Angela to do the thing that I loved. The feeling was practically unbearable.

I walked to my desk again, deciding to write in my journal.

-

Dear Journal,

Today was one of the worst days of my life. Dally yelled at Johnny for staring at me, and called him a queer. He then ran off. I ran off after him, because I wanted to make him feel better. Turns out, he was taking Angela Sheppard on a date tonight. Not only that, he was going to take her to see the new Paul Newman movie. I could feel my heart breaking into a million pieces. I really do love Johnny, and I wish he was with my instead of with her.

Ponyboy Curtis

-

Suddenly, the door to my bedroom opened.