a reminder, water is important, and remember to drink lots of it!! in most of this book, George is NOT in a logical state of mind so don't assume things stated are true!!

TW: eating disorder, body shaming

Previously...

59.6 kgs (127 lbs)

Yep. Mistake. I should've just gone to bed...

George's P.O.V.

I stare at the tiny numbers, the plainness of it all causing me to let out a dry chuckle. It wasn't funny, I knew that. But there was just something in those numbers that made me feel... disconnected.

I stumbled backward, watching as the numbers fell back to zero. Maybe it was all a fluke... I better weigh myself again.

59.6 kgs (127 lbs)

I stepped off the scale, a strangled noise escaping my throat. No... how could it be possible? I had gained weight in between today and yesterday, even after spending an entire day lethargic and dizzy, stomach growling and whining with hunger. I hit the wall, sliding down to the floor numbly. No. No. NO!

I didn't understand. How could I have possibly gained weight? I thought back to what had happened during the day, mind wandering. Then it hit me:

Liquid weighs a lot.

Sure, maybe I hadn't eaten, but I had water... that must be it. How else would I have gained weight? I looked up at the mirror, not able to see my reflection since I was slumped against the wall, but I could imagine what I must look like.

Fat. Ugly. Weak.

A sob caught in my throat. This was going to be my life forever if I didn't do something quick. I didn't want to be alone for the rest of my life... but how could I ever compare to other people when I looked this disgusting? I curled into a ball, wrinkling my nose when I felt my stomach press uncomfortably against my legs. I couldn't be like this... I had to take action, and the sooner, the better.

Tomorrow morning, I'll start working out. Then I can lose the weight and maybe be a bit less disgusting and fat as I am now... the very thought brought a weak smile to my lips, and I fell asleep there, curled up on the bathroom floor.

~

I woke up to a sunbeam in my eyes, groaning and curling even further into a ball. As I became more awake, I was more aware of my surroundings, sitting up on the cold tile and leaning against the wall. I brought my hand to my head, sighing and letting my eyes flutter shut.

My body ached from the awkward sleeping position, the hard tile floor only making things worse. I really should've gone to my bed first...

You don't deserve comfort. You aren't good enough for that.

I shuddered, furrowing my eyebrows. The thought was right, of course, but that didn't mean I wanted to sleep on the floor. Just that I deserve to.

I stood up slowly, leaning heavily against the wall. My breaths came in short pants at the effort, and I knew trying to exercise in this state would be miserable.

But I had to earn comfort. If I just let myself rest and relax, I would just be procrastinating, and worse, gaining more weight. I had to work it off, and the sooner the better.

My phone went off, and I glanced down at the small screen. Dream. Of course. Hesitantly, I clicked accept, holding the device close to my ear.

"Hello?"

"George, hi!"

"Why'd you call me?" I mumbled, a hint of anger seeping into my voice.

"I-" Dream sounded hurt. "I just wanted to talk to you... but clearly you don't want to. I'll just hang up-"

"Wait." I sighed, sitting in my chair. "Sorry..."

"It's okay, Gogy. I kinda wanted to check on you, are you doing alright?" I froze in place. He didn't know. How could he know? It had to be some kind of coinciden-

"George? You there?"

"Oh! Um, yeah, I'm here..." Real smooth, George.

"Are you okay?" Dream wondered. I huffed, crossing my arms even though he couldn't see me.

"I'm fine, Dream," I say shortly.

"Are you sure?" He didn't sound convinced. "This really isn't like you..."

"I'm just busy. It's fine." This is so frustrating... "I have to go. Bye." I hang up before Dream got a chance to respond, sighing and slumping back into my chair with a groan. That didn't really go the way I expected it to, and Dream definitely knew something was up. There was no way he believed that performance...

I shake my head, putting my phone on the desk, screen down. I had to go exercise now. I was still wearing my merch hoodie and jeans from yesterday, so I changed into sweatpants quickly. I debated switching out the hoodie for a t-shirt, but decided it would be fine the way it was.

After all, the more I sweat, the more weight I lose, right? It made sense. I left my phone on the desk, walking out the door to go on a run. This would help me lose weight for sure.

~

I trudged back to my house, feeling dizzy and faint. Everything hurt, and I was completely drenched in sweat, which was disgusting. I unlocked the door, making a beeline for my chair. I practically fell into it, body limp and exhausted. My phone was still sitting there, and I picked it up, eyes darting lazily over messages.

My gaze landed on one message in particular. It was on a group chat with Dream and Sapnap, and it looked like plans were being made to meet up. The corners of my lips turned up slightly, my eyes closing tiredly.

I didn't read the messages, getting up to take a shower instead. I felt disgusting, and the hot water would be soothing to my sore muscles. I had ended up running nearly five kilometers (around 3 miles), and I was quite proud of myself. I burned a lot of calories, and lost weight through sweat as well, which was oddly comforting.

~

I stepped out of the shower, air humid and mirror foggy. I dried off quickly, putting on a clean hoodie– Dream's merch, the black one with the white smiley on it. It was way too big on me, but I loved it.

Head in the clouds, I wandered over to my chair, grabbing my phone and scrolling through the Dream Team group chat. A lot of the messages were just Dream and Sapnap yelling at me to respond, so I typed out a quick apology and sent it, getting a response almost immediately.

Gogy: sorry I was busy

Sap: join discord call

I quickly open discord, getting an invite to the call moments later.

"Hey..."

Idk that seems like an ending lmao

See y'all back for the next chapter (I better see you back- (THIS IS NOT A THREAT ILY))