Reviewer: Ria (fire_dragon_24)

Review: What The Eyes Can See

Client: heyennbee

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Cover and Blurb: The cover for the book is very fitting. The picture compliments the plot of the book and the name of the book perfectly. No changes need to be made there. The blurb is also great! It contains the perfect components. With a hint of information to give the reader an idea of what the book is about, but not enough to make it predictable, it really is a blurb that entices you to take a closer look at the book. Even so, I found some grammatical mistakes.

The mistakes to be corrected:

"They say the eyes are the windows to the soul, it's true" should be " They say the eyes are the windows to the soul. It's true."

"Ever since Isla was a child, she tried her best not to look into the eyes of another for only misfortune fell upon her" should have a comma. "into the eyes of another, for..."

"Especially with those huge cat eye Ray-Bans which no one has seen her without and a permanent scowl on her full red lips." should be "Especially with those huge, cat eye Ray-Bans, that no one has seen her without, and a permanent scowl on her full, red lips."

These are not huge errors. In a second, I will talk more about the vocabulary and grammar. Generally speaking, the blurb has a hooking factor and definitely places itself in the readers mind, silently begging for the book to be read. That is excellent! Not many changes need to be made to the blurb, other than the few grammatical errors that I have pointed out.

Grammar: The book is nothing but flawless when it comes to the vocabulary and almost completely polished when it comes to the grammar. The descriptions are brief, but they give the reader a good platform to visualize the environment, emotions and situations that Isla, the main character, experiences. I spotted only a few grammatical errors throughout the book, which is amazing! Otherwise, the grammar is also flawless and the use of descriptive words is truly phenomenal. From the authors mind, to the screen, all scenes have been described perfectly. The fact that the author knows exactly what she wants to write, and how to deliver it to the readers, can easily be spotted. I commend the author on this and must add an excerpt to show the impeccable writing skills.

I kept doing it until I couldn't see myself and all that was left were broken shards lying on the floor. With each punch, more and more blood spattered on the wall but I couldn't care less. The physical pain was much more tolerable than the mental torture I had subjected myself to all these years. The pain was welcome now, it was what I deserved.

Going back towards the grammar, as I said before, it was almost flawless. I only noticed a few places where a comma was supposed to be added and one place where it was used incorrectly.

Example 1: "One blue pill flawlessly slid into my palm. I placed it in my mouth and swallowed. Screwing the cap shut I put the container back in it's place, promising myself that I would never let it see the light of day again." A comma should be added here; "Screwing the cap shut, I put the container..."

Example 2: "Doing the entire thing meant I had to stay overtime, which is what I did, and by the time I was done my brain was fried" A comma should be added here; "and by the time I was done, my brain was fried."

Example 3: "For the first time, I didn't need to worry about what was in store for the future, I didn't need to worry about looking into another's eyes, I didn't need to live like an addict dependent on sleeping pills to attain something as simple as sleep, I didn't need to worry about who was out for my neck, I wasn't burdened by a power that brought me nothing but misery, I didn't need to live in the same house where my mothers taunts continued to haunt me."

For this paragraph, the commas should be removed and full stops should be added instead. Also, for the last line, "same" should be removed. Either that, or "continued to" should be removed and "haunt" should be written in past tense.

There were barely any grammatical mistakes. If the chapters are edited one last time, the few remaining ones should be taken care of.

Plot: The plot was truly astounding. Like a good thriller/mystery book should have, it contained suspense, created tension and wasn't too fast paced. I liked the fact that the author added a suspenseful, concluding line after every chapter. This technique usually urges the reader to continue and is a great alternate to writing cliff hangers. The plot was developed over time, moving at a perfect pace. More information about Isla's past was learnt, and the story's build up factor was amazing. It showed Isla's journey towards self realization about what she had become. Along the way, she committed some unforgettable crimes and hid quite a lot of important things from the detective.

The plot had a great hooking factor. It made the reader want to read more and answer all of their questions. I found myself lost in the book and completely forgot that I was reading it for the purpose of reviewing it. The flawless grammar, amazing descriptions and beautiful cover were bonus factors that enticed the reader to read the book. Overall, the plot was immaculate.

Characterization: The characterization is one of the many strong points of this book. From what I can tell, Isla is an egotistical, reserved and slightly scary woman in front of other people. However, by herself, she is nothing but desperately sad about her ability's. The addition of the suspicious detective and the story behind Isla's mother emphasized the personality of Isla. Her personality was a huge contribution to the plot of the book, and I couldn't have been more impressed with the way the author developed Isla's character. From egotistical and slightly conceited, she realizes all the wrong she's done. It's an impressive way to contribute to the story's plot.

Overall enjoyment: I absolutely loved the book! It contained little to no flaws. I feel that it truly has a great amount of potential and has a great plot.. Since the book is completed, I recommend for the author to promote the book. Whether that's done by entering awards or mentioning the book on the message board's of others, I'm certain that it can reach a great amount of popularity as it is so well written and appreciable.

Good luck to you Enn bee! I hope you keep up the absolutely phenomenal work!

-Ria xx