Reviewer: Mila_333

Review: In Love and Diplomacy

Client: BritishGravity

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Cover

I love the rose and gun elements on the pitch-black background and the faint smoky shadow, they correspond perfectly to the plot. The cover does have this dark element exuded. It is creative, unique, enticing and somewhat mysterious. I absolutely love the font style and font size of the title, even if the 'diplomacy' word used two lines, you correctly placed it and it fits perfectly with all the other elements in the cover. The Author name is well written and clearly visible. This might be my personal preference, but I guess you should write 'Novel written by' first and then put your Author name.

Title

What's really important for a title is that it has to match with the plot. If it doesn't, it becomes irrelevant or click-bait. In your case, the title corresponds really well with the plot. However, the most crucial factor you need to consider when looking for a title is that it should be enticing to readers. There should be a magnetic essence that compels readers to add the book to their reading list upon reading the title itself. Unfortunately, 'In Love and Diplomacy' does not totally have the ultimate eye-catching effect. Talking from personal experience, usually when there's the word 'Love' included in a title, if it doesn't have another word with a magnetic effect, it doesn't always work. The word 'love' itself is so broad in general, it gets lost if it doesn't have the required supporting element. This can be only personal advice and you may as well go along with how you planned it out. However, reviewing the title as it is, I would suggest you place it as 'Love and Diplomacy' instead. It rings better and even has a deep connection to the book, especially to Avery. For instance, she sacrificed love and had always been a diplomat. However, now she's craving for that love and is kind of on the way to fall in love. The title refers exactly to that. The title could also mean she's gonna get both. It can mean she's falling in love but in the end diplomacy wins or vice versa. It has a mysterious end and that is what is exciting about it. The current title exudes the same meaning, however the suggestion sounds better in my opinion.

Blurb

The blurb is specifically on point, matches the plot and is well written. I recommend putting Avery's section before Reed's simply because the story is written in her POV. The last sentence promotes an element of thrill and drama ahead and is a nice concluding sentence. However, I wouldn't suggest including the part where Cruz was the target since you left this as a question for the readers in the book. If Cruz is indeed the target, it then simply gives away the suspense. But if he isn't, then this particular sentence in the blurb will resort to misleading information provided that doesn't correspond to the plot. So, I suggest you clear that part out; you may insert a line saying Avery might be a potential target too! Leave it out blurry for the readers and avoid making any solid statement.

Plot

The plot is the best part of the story. Every little detail has been meticulously taken care of. The crystal clear description of the actions of the characters was simply brilliant; it definitely has to do with your writing style. Your writing style is enough to lure the reader from the very start but plot-wise chapter three was the hook chapter, basically you know your readers will stick once they've read till the end of chapter three. Though, I have to point out that it seemed a bit surreal for the female protagonist to know that something was wrong when Kennedy went to the toilet. It's a bit over-the-top for her character as she seems like a know-it-all woman, except I know she isn't like that after I completed my whole read. But, this part seems a bit non-natural, I advise you to make this scene a bit more natural and real. Moreover, the whole concept of the story is lit and very enchanting. I really admire the amount of research you did considering you aren't even in the political field. The whole case you drafted was outstanding and definitely matches the plot although there's still a lot of stuff to unveil yet. The element of suspense is truly thrilling and fun. I was on edge the whole time!

Paradoxically, I did notice a plot-hole. It's something I already hinted on in the comments but I'm going to go further to explain what I noticed.

(To readers: This includes spoilers, read at your own risk!)

You introduced Greystone as one of the bests in the country. Hence, it seemed a bit weird for them not to question Avery when Reed held her as a suspect in his mind. And when Avery provided the case files, it's strange that Reed only looked into the case that led to her promotion a.k.a her first case when he suspected Avery was hiding something about the first case when they were asking each other questions. The fact that Reed was already feeling dubious about Avery's involvement in the attack, he should have investigated this part way before he bonded with Avery, he should have done this particular research when she was initially a suspect in his eyes in the first place and then you would have had Avery clarify that out the way you have in the last chapter updated. Now, this involves a clash, one where you will have to restructure the plot. It can be a lot of work but it is something contradictory. You cannot claim Greystone as the best and have them falter this much in their work. The shooter entered the premises of Cruz's party, this is their first miss. Cruz and Avery's pictures were taken when there were supposedly guards on watch, this is their second miss. Having Reed not investigate Avery further in the first part of the story will be a third miss and I don't think will be okay. I'm simply putting this saying, "Actions speak louder than words" into practice here.

However, this edit will require a lot of work and you might consider it later on. Or maybe, you can put it as such. You can insert a scene at the time sequence when Reed saved Avery and then suspected her. You can add the part where Reed actually investigated Avery in her first case.

Or the second suggestion is that you can simply add this statement where Reed claims he had looked at her first case back when she was a suspect and he didn't find anything on her. He then investigated further with Cruz after seeing Avery's hesitation to answer about her first case. This way there's not much work to do and the plot-hole is minimized. The second suggestion somewhat resembles how the story currently is, but I recommend you to make this part clearer in the dialogues and stress on this part.

Apart from that, the pacing was good. In my opinion, perhaps, the first case should have been revealed a little bit earlier, or maybe not the first case, but you should provide something more for the readers in relation to the shooter. Now, maybe you have dispensed just that very discreetly, if that's the case, then I must say well done because I personally didn't notice it. If not, then I must say that there is the element of mystery/suspense present but at the same time it's quite vague, leaving the readers with not much to ponder. This is only something I felt as a reader; I might be wrong depending on how you climax the story.

Writing style

The most prominent aspect of your writing style is the lively description you provide. This is your best feature, making your writing style outstanding. You have a way to make the readers totally get into the book. At some point, I was literally unaware of my surroundings as I immersed myself in the story. The way you described every single detail, be it when the character's talking, eating, playing puzzle, pondering, sitting, working, etc. Another feature I really liked was the way you wrote the characters' dialogues. The accuracy relating to the two main characters' voices in direct speeches is on another level. At times, I would automatically know Avery's speaking as the way her speech is delivered thoroughly matches her character. You passed flying colors in making the characters have a particular voice of their own and this is one of the most important tasks accomplished!

Character

Beginning with the female protagonist, I love how you made her appear bold, career-driven, passionate, fierce and intelligent. She automatically held a strong aura with the way you introduced her. Then as the story goes deeper, you reveal another side of her, the softer side. You let us see how she can get affected by the happenings around her. How she leaped from the bold and fierce character to the scared one, trying to keep her head afloat in the deep waters. She depicted generosity when she had to be scared for her life. That's how special her personality is. Heck she threw herself in front of a car to save Rolo. I don't think we need any proof to believe how dedicated and compassionate she is. I loved the conflict she had with love and diplomacy; her thoughts had been entirely valid and so real. It happens to all of us and this made her character more realistic.

Digging deeper, the over thinking part was one particular aspect which made her character even more real. It felt as if I'm seeing/imagining/meeting someone so real. For this certain area, the female protagonist needs growth. Back when she was scared, she faltered for a while, the part where she was at the hotel and ran away with Rolo. However, she acknowledged her mistake and agreed to Reed. She snapped and decided to be the fearless Avery. Nonetheless, the over thinking began taking a toll and this side of hers needs growth. It's normal to over think and it will not stop in a day's time. Nonetheless, I need to see her validating her thoughts and emotions. She needs to start taking things in her stride and know how to control the different outcomes; they definitely get better at a later stage in the book. Hence, there's gradual growth which is exactly the remedy the female protagonist needs.

As far as Reed's concerned, I loved how mysterious he's been since the very start. He does not give away anything and this is exactly his specialty. He was not showing any feelings towards the female protagonist as well as he wouldn't budge when he was asked about the shooter. We could not get enough of him because of his mysterious ways and there was so little provided yet much which made us crave for more of him.

I really cherished the moments he would not crack. He would remain as hard as a shell when Avery wanted to make small talk. No matter how much I wanted to see them getting close, this was one of their moments I liked the most because it made me yearn for more of their bond and eventually made their connection to the readers even deeper because we all wanted something to happen but we knew we would have to wait.

Howbeit, it was crystal clear at one point that he was feeling something for Avery, especially when Avery met up with the accident. Their bond had strengthened to a greater extent. Nevertheless, the biggest turn off was when he questioned Avery's integrity yet again. I wholly understood him since the very beginning, but I guess I thought he knew Avery quite better after spending this much time with her. Maybe, there was still a lot to learn about her but he knew so much better than before and to accuse her of being a suspect again, based only on the photos and Avery's hesitation on answering his question on her first case was a bit harsh. It was the first time I felt frustrated at him. He definitely needs to learn to be more trusting, patient and to give Avery the benefit of doubt.

I wouldn't ask you to change anything or even the part where Reed accused Avery of being complicit with the man in the picture because as much frustrating it was for us readers, it created drama and obviously answers we were yearning to hear since the very beginning.

As for the link between the two protagonists, apart from the things I mentioned above regarding their bonding, I'd want to see a lot more in the upcoming chapters. The development of their relationship and the pace was bang on, it was steady and entertaining. We've already seen Reed's protective side till chapter 27; we now want to see a deeper side of love. I personally want things to be on another level and I can't wait to see that happen. I also want to see how Avery deals with the whole thing since she hasn't had a partner for a while.

Grammar

You hold a remarkable bundle of vocabularies in hand, which certainly uplift the level of your writing style. I have noted only one grammatical mistake throughout and it's in the late chapters which I already pointed out in the comments and gave a brief explanation on. Apart from that, your grammar's on point and if ever there were any grammatical mistakes, it would have been so minuscule to even notice.

Reader's enjoyment

This is by far the best book I've gotten to review. I honestly thank you for giving me the opportunity to read this masterpiece. I am definitely adding this one to my 'Best Stories Ever' reading list. I also urge everyone reading this review to check out this book. You won't regret it! I will also share this book in my announcements.