Over the next few days, I had time to think about it.

Of course, when I said think about it, I actually meant replay the conversation with Owen in my head over and over until it drove me crazy. It probably wasn't the best course of action. For one thing, it didn't help that I couldn't remember our exact words, and therefore each new version came out differently. Was I as awkward as I recalled, or had that been him rubbing off on me? But then, thinking on it, maybe it hadn't been awkward at all. Could it have been a totally normal encounter that I was agonising over unnecessarily?

Realistically, it was probably that last one. But with so little to occupy me after the bustle of uni, and between shifts at the arcade, it only left time for my mind to wander.

However, all the thinking brought me to one conclusion: it didn't have to be like this. Sure, Owen and I left for uni on bad terms, but only in the heat of a breakup. Telling the guy you'd spent the best part of a great year with you wanted to cut things short was never going to be easy; I couldn't blame myself for that. So maybe I had to reach out and make the first move.

And the more I thought about it, the more it made sense. I was always the more forward one, so how likely was it really that Owen would be the one to come back and patch things up? He was probably hiding out in his room right now, avoiding hitting the beach or any part of town for fear of seeing me. Maybe he was even reconsidering his offer to help Greg out, now that he knew I'd be down on the pier so much. I had to do something.

A few days passed before we saw each other again. When my first week drew to a close, and Friday arrived with some duller weather, it was on my way back from lunch that I noticed Owen on the arcade floor. He was on the prize counter, this time having donned the unflattering XXL scarlet polo forced on all front-of-house staff. He pushed his glasses up his nose as he fed a string of tickets into the counting machine, a kid on tiptoes at the counter eagerly waiting for the number. I watched as it flashed onscreen, and the kid started jumping excitedly on the spot, clearly delighted by what he saw. And, sure enough, Owen was soon handing over a Super Soaker unhooked from behind him.

The day had been a short one, and having got the worst of the work over with that morning, I was set to pack up my stuff and head out at a decent time for a Friday afternoon. And I had a plan.

As the kid with the Super Soaker went charging past, I weaved through the machines and headed towards the prize counter. Owen's head was down, fiddling with the counting machine, and he looked up only once I was a couple of feet away from the desk.

He looked half surprised to see me, but like he'd known it was going to happen sooner or later. "Sydney. Hey."

"Hey," I said. "Didn't know you were working today."

I felt like breathing a sigh of relief, if that wasn't so weird to do aloud. After our first encounter, making it through a sentence that didn't sound completely idiotic felt like an achievement, and I kind of wanted to pat myself on the back. Maybe it was possible to act like my usual self.

"Last minute call-in," Owen said. "It's not so bad, though. As it turns out, getting back behind this counter in this God awful shirt still feels like second nature."

I smiled. "Just like riding a bike, right?"

He laughed, adjusting the glasses on his nose. "Kind of, actually."

By this point, I was up against the counter, and I found myself leaning forward on it. A natural confidence had returned, leaving me to wonder why it had been so difficult last time. "So, I was thinking," I said, "we should catch up. We're both back in Walden, and the last time we spoke was, what? Three years ago? It's been ages."

"Yeah, I suppose it has," Owen said, scratching the back of his neck. "You look different. Your hair looks good."

Instinctively, I reached up to touch the ends of hair tickling the back of my neck, and couldn't help smiling. The change to ice blonde had been daring, spurred on by a sense of confidence before university. I'd been in love with the idea of leaving Walden, of being able to become somebody new, and so my hair was taken along for the ride. It was a far cry from my natural limp brown – just the way I wanted it.

"Thanks," I said, before pausing for thought. "Would it be offensive if I told you that you hadn't changed at all?"

He broke out in a goofy smile, and I noticed what I hadn't for a long time – his two bottom teeth, ever so slightly crooked. "Not at all," he said, "since it's true. When you find one look that works, it's hard to stray away."

"Right you are." I ended up grinning as well. "You know, we should go out for a drink sometime. One day after work. I'm sure we've both got loads to tell."

It was true. Really, I had no idea what my ex had been up to since we'd left for uni. Facebook posts had served as occasional hints, but even they weren't a reliable source of information, since Owen wasn't the type to splash every minute of his life online. In fact, I'd always struggled to imagine him at uni. He wasn't a big drinker, or a big partier, and I wasn't sure how he'd cope in an environment so heavily focused on both. He'd just been too smart not to go – and so I assumed it was a complete academic venture, rather than a quest for anything else.

"You know," he said, "I was going to ask you the same thing. Now we're working together, we might as well get back on friendly terms, right?"

Friendly terms. Pretty much a foreign environment for two people who'd gone from lovers to non-speakers, all in the space of a single conversation.

"Exactly," I said, wondering whether the relief was evident in my growing smile. "It only makes sense." When a pause stretched between us, slightly longer than I wanted, I found myself glancing at his workspace behind the counter. "So how's the rest of your day looking? Surely you must be getting out of here soon."

"Oh, yeah, it's not so bad. I'm only on sick cover, and the evening shift starts in another hour. Once someone comes to take over, I'm free as a bird."

"Wow. Sounds surprisingly bearable."

"I know." He looked up at me. "How about you?"

"However long it takes me to finish up on the books," I told him, my tone growing jokey. "You know I'm the smug one with the flexible working schedule. Probably the subject of all the jealous gossip in the staff room?"

"Oh, so that's you," he said, joking too. "Completely unfair."

I shot him a winning smile, one that came surprisingly easily, as I started to move away from the prize counter. A kid laden with strips of tokens was eyeing up the prizes behind Owen, and I didn't want to come between him and his novelty keyring. "Maybe I'll catch you after work?"

"Yeah," he said breezily, as the kid approached. "Maybe."

So the conversation had gone better than expected, and my optimism pretty much carried me through the rest of the afternoon. There was something bearable about sifting through Greg's finances when I could finally be certain my heart-of-gold ex didn't hate my guts – and the biggest surprise of all was that I managed to feign convincing excitement when Mum called to tell me she'd settled on table decorations for the wedding. It normally proved a challenge, but not today. And when I slung my bag over my shoulder, with the weekend stretching out ahead, I was in a better mood than ever. The plan had already formed in my head. A pointedly casual plan, but a plan nonetheless. I'd finish up the same time as Owen (a total coincidence, of course), catch up with him to wish him a good weekend, and maybe suggest the drink I'd mentioned earlier. A simple plan – one that only needed a yes.

When I came out of the office, however, the prize counter was being manned by one of the evening staff, and Owen was nowhere to be seen. He'd left early. Disappointment came over me, though I tried my best to convince myself otherwise. It was stupid, anyway. There was a whole summer ahead – potentially more if I couldn't find a way out of Walden – and there would be plenty of other opportunities to catch up. I could wait just a little longer.

Cloud covered sunshine as I headed out onto the pier. Somewhere in the distance, they turned grey; it seemed rain was on our way. The pier was busier than usual; deteriorating weather had brought hordes of people off the beach, seeking entertainment not so reliant on sunshine. I had to dodge several kids sprinting in my direction, parents speed-walking behind them. Could there ever be a quiet summer day in Walden? Thinking on it, maybe there was an advantage to staying through the winter – at least I could get a break from the tourists.

The crowd was thick, but I could make out faces – at least those that stood still for long enough. Most of them I didn't recognise, since they'd stay for a day at most, but every so often I caught sight of a local I remembered from three years ago. The fact that most looked identical, unchanged by the time span of my university career, was either comforting or depressing – I couldn't work out which.

I was about halfway down the pier when a face caught my eye. Or maybe it was the uniform: the standout yellow shirt with lifeguard emblazoned on the back. It was the same girl I'd noticed earlier in the week, at the top of a chair on the beach, a new face amongst so many old. She didn't shock me particularly. I mean, there was her slender physique and striking dark features to be jealous of, but that wasn't it. There was something else.

But then my eyes darted to the person approaching her – the one she pulled in for a quick hello kiss – and I realised what that something was.

That was Owen.

Wait, what?

For a moment, I just stood there dumbstruck. It was mean, but I thought I had to be seeing things. There was a mismatch here – a total incompatibility between what I thought I knew, and what stood right in front of me.

Owen. The guy who studied computing at the closest university to home, who spent most nights playing video games, who'd cried when I broke his heart. The guy I'd assumed would come back from university as single as when he'd left.

It crossed my mind, and instantly I felt like a terrible person. Of course it was wrong of me to assume that kind of thing – and with an air of such superiority that told me I could count on it. Why shouldn't Owen have a girlfriend?

And yet I still couldn't quite wrap my head around it.

I should've legged it. The minute I saw them together, I should've realised this wasn't a moment to be interrupted, and swiftly took my ass home. The weekend could've been spent processing this new information, and I'd be back on Monday with a re-evaluated look on Walden life.

But that wasn't what happened.

It probably had something to do with the fact I was stood there like a muppet, frozen to the spot. Had I been moving, I would've had the chance to escape. But Owen pulled away from the girl and opened his eyes just in time to notice me.

Shit.

Recognition flickered across his face at once. It was too late, and I was standing too close. We'd both clocked onto the fact that the other was stood there, and pretending otherwise would've been painfully awkward.

"Sydney. Hey!"

Just hearing my name was enough to make me cringe internally. The girl had turned around at this point, eyes searching where Owen's were fixed, trying to see what he was looking at. The chance of a getaway had slipped through my fingers, and I was left with no choice but to step towards them.

"Hey," I said, once I got close enough. "Fancy seeing you here."

"Crazy coincidence, right?" he joked. Only up close did I get a real perspective of how tall the girl was – she must've been at least five eleven, towering over my average frame. Even Owen only had a couple of inches on her; their statures matched closer than ours ever had. "This is my girlfriend, Katie. Katie, this is Sydney."

I wasn't quite sure how to greet her, but the decision was made when she stuck a hand out for me to shake, smiling warmly. "Hey," she said, "nice to meet you."

I forced myself to smile too. "Likewise."

Katie had looked intimidating from a distance, but coming face-to-face with her belonged in a whole other league. To say I felt self-conscious would be an understatement. I was suddenly aware of everything – the random jeans and shirt pair I'd thrown on for work, the wonky eyeliner flick I hadn't bothered to correct that morning, the way my curvy figure had become a little too curvy after three years of student life. Both literally and figuratively, I paled in comparison to the tall, toned lifeguard before me.

"I've known Sydney for years," Owen told her. "Another Walden native."

"That's me." I smiled weakly. "So where are you from?"

"I'm originally from Birmingham," Katie said. "Safe to say it's a little busier than here. But, you know, I've always liked to move about, and I thought going to university on the south coast would offer some peace. Turns out this guy here knew the most peaceful place there was, and when I landed a lifeguarding job for the summer, I couldn't resist."

"Oh, cool." I hesitated. "So is that like a permanent move, or...?"

She laughed. "Well, I'm not sure yet! We'll see what the future holds. We're renting a little apartment for the next few months, but who knows? We might end up staying longer."

And there it was: another opportunity for my heart to plummet.

"You've got an apartment?" I said to Owen, my disbelief poorly concealed. "You mean you're not living at home?"

It was impossible for him to pick up on the way my insides were now churning, but his easy smile still felt like a stab in the gut. "Not anymore. We found this great little flat above the gallery on the high street. I mean, it's pretty small, but the rent was fair and it's ideal for us to set up camp over the summer. You'll have to come see it sometime."

At this point, I couldn't think of anything I wanted to do less than go over and see Owen and Katie's cosy little apartment, but I didn't let it show. My face had quickly become a mask, betraying no hint about how my head was spinning with all the new information. It was jealousy – of course it was. I couldn't deny that pang to the chest when I realised all of the assumptions I'd made about Owen were wrong. He was the one who had things together. He'd moved out of his parents' house, into a flat with a steady girlfriend, where they probably cooked dinner together and shared laundry and had sex without worrying about parents overhearing. All while I felt like I'd travelled back in time.

"Yeah, I will," I said, though the prospect made me feel sick.

"Hey, we were just headed to the pub to grab an after-work drink." Owen's words were totally innocent, but I couldn't stop noticing how close he stood to Katie, and how this simple gesture felt like it mocked me in every way. "Fancy coming with? We were just talking earlier about how nice it'd be to catch up."

I had suggested it, but in the space of a few minutes, my enthusiasm had sunk like a lead balloon. "Yeah, uh... now's probably not a good time, actually. I need to get home, help my mum out with something."

I didn't sound convincing: I knew it. But if it got me out of an evening third wheeling, it was good enough for me.

"That's a shame," Owen said. "Maybe another time?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Definitely."

"We should get going," Katie said to him, and my stomach dropped a little further as I watched her link an arm through his. "It was lovely to meet you, Sydney. I'll see you around?"

"Yeah, definitely."

"See you at work," Owen called, but they were already heading off, before I'd even moved my feet. I managed a limp wave after them, but my arm fell back to my side as soon as he'd turned his head.

Watching them leave was equally painful. I couldn't quite work out why – or at least admit it to myself. Just like that, my expectations had been shattered, and I'd emerged on the other side feeling more pathetic than ever. Life after graduation wasn't supposed to be glamorous. It was meant to take a while to find your feet. At least that's what I'd told myself as the rejections poured in, and I started packing for my London departure.

But here, stood halfway down Walden pier, watching my ex-boyfriend leave arm-in-arm with his new girlfriend and head for their own place, I realised things were different. Owen had been lucky enough to land on his feet, but I'd just toppled over backwards.

And I didn't quite know how to dealwith it.    

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Hi, everyone! Bit of a roughly edited chapter as my mind's not quite in the right place to do anything in depth. I've had a bit of a crazy weekend. I went for a job interview Friday morning, during which they offered me the job... and then asked me to start on Monday. I'm excited, because it's my first real job and as a trainee medical writer it's pretty much ideal for me. However, I've had no time to prepare so I'm incredibly nervous for tomorrow. Wish me luck!

If next week's update is late, you'll know why. Go easy on me! But I'll try my best.

- Leigh