Auditions were the last thing on my mind. Instead, dark thoughts swirled around my brain like storm clouds, with each scenario worse than the last.

I smelled like a combination of grease and sticky sweat. The dean wasn't likely to be impressed by that, but she was a fair woman. She also usually liked my performances.

Working hard was the only way to prove I belonged in her department. Every time I walked on the stage, I showed her that my scholarship was worth something.

The read-through flew by, and when it was over, I turned on my phone to see four missed calls and seven texts. I groaned and ducked into the bathroom silently to process more bad news.

Noah was calling again with more doom and gloom. He'd only left one voicemail which was manageable.

"Lexi, Dad didn't come home again. I'm getting worried. Mom was here last night with her friends. The place is trashed. I'm trying to clean up. The boys are okay. Call me, please."

His texts were more recent, each becoming more urgent.

The more of the texts I read, the more it felt like the weight of the world was dropping on my shoulders. Noah couldn't keep the family together. He couldn't handle Mom. With Cory on the other side of the globe, the only responsible person he could turn to was me.

Sinking against the cold metal stall door, I dialed Noah's number. He picked up on the third ring.

"Lexi, thank goodness," he sounded tired.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Mason woke up Mom, and she's majorly hungover," Noah said. "I don't... I just don't know how much longer I can keep it together. School isn't even in session, and Dad is away. Mom... she scares me, Lexi. I know she's always like this, but she's been away so much lately."

"I can't leave school," I said. "Does the pantry have food?"

"Mom used a lot of it at her party," Noah said. "She's really just... I don't know, but her behavior has been wilder."

"I'll Venmo you money for groceries," I said. "And the bills are being taken care of?"

"Yeah," Noah said. "Calvin's still pretty upset you decided that the internet bill wasn't important anymore."

Someone had to make the hard decisions for the family. Unfortunately, that somebody was me since I was the only adult who could adult properly.

"I'm sorry," I said. "Can you take them to the library this week?"

Noah paused. "I can try. I'm lined up to mow four lawns tomorrow morning and clean three pools in the afternoon. Then I'm watching the Leermen kids in the evening. All in all, that's hopefully a good hundred dollar day."

"Save twenty and put the rest towards rent," I said.

Noah groaned. "I know the drill. I wish Mr. Stinker hadn't raised rent this summer."

Our landlord wasn't actually named Mr. Stinker. Arthur Hinkler had been our landlord as long as I'd been alive. He was an ancient little man who always sent his son to fix any problems with the property.

Mr. Hinkler was forced to raise the rents of the houses he owned in the area because the city had built an elementary school in an empty lot beside the neighborhood. That raised the property taxes and the rent in the entire area. I didn't exactly blame Mr. Hinkler for it, but the change was a challenge for the family.

"It's not his fault," I said. "You be nice to the old man."

"I know," Noah said. "I miss you, Lexi. Last summer, we had fun babysitting and doing lawns together. It's boring without you, especially since your old iPod finally broke. Now I don't even have tunes."

"You could load them on your phone," I said.

"It's not the same," Noah said. "When's your next visit?"

I sucked in a breath. "Emma, Kate, and I are driving out next weekend after tech day. You know that."

"Lexi?" Noah's voice sounded small. "You are coming back, right? Not like Cory."

My heart felt like Noah had sat on it and deflated it like a balloon. Losing Cory, his big brother, to the army had left us all abandoned, especially Noah. He was now the oldest brother at home, and Mason and Calvin looked to him instead of Cory.

"I'm not Cory," I said. "I'm coming back."

"Good," Noah said.

The door to the bathroom opened. I heard footsteps on the tile, and below the stall crack, I recognized a pair of checkered shoes.

"Lexi, you in here?" Emma Kate asked.

"I have to go," I said to Noah. "I love you."

"Bye, Lexi," Noah said.

The call disconnected, and I unlocked the stall door. Pushing the door open, I faced my best friend. Her purple beanie was crooked, and her frizzy hair looked more unkempt as usual.

"So, what's up?" She asked. "It's me. We can talk."

"That was Noah," I said.

"And you were late to auditions," Emma Kate said. "That have anything to do with Noah?"

I sucked in my cheeks. "My dad called on my break at my job, and the orders piled up. I lost track of time."

Emma Kate winced. "You want to talk about it?"

"Not really," I said. "My dad said all the usual things. He complained about Mom. Said she's nothing but trouble but has no plan on how to make it better or talk to her about his troubles. He talked about how the kids in his summer school all have little prospects. He barely mentioned the boys until I brought them up."

My dad called me about once or twice a week to purely gripe about Mom. He didn't want suggestions or help. It was just his way to get out all his frustration. I was his therapist, and my job was to smile and nod.

"I'm sorry," Emma Kate said. "Do you have afternoon plans, or do you want to commiserate over cherry soda floats like old times?"

"Aren't we a little old for cherry floats?" I smiled.

When I joined the theater department in middle school, I met Emma Kate. She looked past my second-hand clothes and angry attitude and let me hang out with her and her classmates even though she was a year older.

We'd drank cherry soda floats made with cheap vanilla ice cream and cherry soda from the school vending machine that we ate out of styrofoam cups as we walked home from school. They stained our tongues red, and that always made us laugh silly.

After I'd followed Emma Kate out here to college, we'd started making cherry floats again to remember old times. There was a carton of cheap ice cream and at least four liters of cherry soda at our place right now.

"I was planning on checking in with Parker and running a few laps before crashing at home," I said. "How was his audition? I'm sorry I missed it."

"He did well," Emma Kate said. "Everyone did. I'm kinda glad we don't have to make up the cast list ourselves, even if it means we have to have dinner with Dean Ryder tonight."

Dinner with Dean Ryder. I'd totally forgotten she'd invited us to her house this evening. Mentally I rearranged my tasks for the afternoon, trying to fit in a shower and change clothes. I was a hot mess right now, and it was barely noon.

"You forgot, didn't you," Emma Kate said.

I nodded. "I've been busy."

"No worries," Emma Kate said. "Dinner is at seven. If you get home at five or six, we can ride to the dean's house together."

"Right," I said.

"Don't push yourself too hard," Emma Kate said. "What are your lunch plans?"

"I have some leftovers from the café," I said. "I'll be fine."

"I think Parker is lurking outside," Emma Kate said. "Just a heads up. Bradley and I are going fabric shopping with Riley this afternoon. Call me if you need a ride or anything."

Emma Kate walked out of the bathroom, leaving me a moment alone. I stared at my reflection in the mirror. The dark shadows under my eyes were the darkest they'd been in weeks.

Splashing some water on my face, I tried to wipe away some of the crusted sweat. The porous brown paper towel was too thin to do much other than be completely saturated in moments. I gave up throwing it away in the too full waste bin.

I slumped out of the bathroom half hoping that Emma Kate might have warded anyone off who might try to look for me. Unfortunately, my best friend wasn't that good at reading my mind because Parker leaned on the wall across from the bathroom entrance.

He pushed off and walked towards me with purpose. There was a level of worry in his eyes that I was usually able to shake from people by projecting confidence.

"You nearly missed auditions," he said.

"No," I said. "I was just running late. It's fine."

"I never apologized for Lizzie yesterday," Parker said. "She was over the line, and I talked to her about it. She felt really bad about thinking we were dating. You have a boyfriend, and I didn't mean to have her put you on the spot..."

"What?" I frowned.

It was a sweet and absolutely blubbering apology to be sorry for his stepmother thinking we were together. I got her was embarrassed, but I wasn't sure where he got the idea I had a boyfriend. Maybe one of the guys had told him that as a joke.

Parker took a deep breath and tried again. "I respect you have a boyfriend..."

"I don't have a boyfriend," I said. "Whoever told you that is sorely misinformed."

"You said Noah was your boyfriend when I told you he texted," Parker said. "On the track field."

"Oh," it all came flooding back to me. "That was a joke. Noah is my brother. He's fifteen, and he texts me all the time."

"Oh," Parker looked at his shoes. "Oh... I'm still sorry about Lizzie, though."

"Lizzie was fine," I said. "If you ever came home with me like that, my brothers would make all sorts of similar assumptions."

"Would they?" Parker sounded surprised.

"I've never brought home anyone special except Emma Kate when I was twelve, and she was thirteen," I said. "My house is... I don't let people into my home life. It's better to keep it far away from everything."

"That bad, huh?" Parker cracked a smile. "Guess it's only fair I take you to my mom's house some time. Let her embarrass me in front of you too. At least she and my Aunt Layla can cook."

"Sounds nice," I said.

It had been a good long while since I'd had a good homecooked meal. Emma Kate mostly subsisted on veggies and chicken, and I ate boxed pasta and protein bars when I wasn't living off Cheesy Fatted Café leftovers.

"Are you going running this afternoon?" He asked.

"I do have to train," I said.

"Am I allowed to tag along?" He asked. "Or do you prefer to run alone?"

I didn't mind the company, but it took an unusual amount of stamina to keep up with me. All of my nonathletic friends couldn't run six miles with me straight.

"If you can keep up," I said. "I'm grabbing lunch first, though."

"I can keep up," Parker said. "Lizzie packed me a lunch. Shouldn't be too bad since it's mostly packaged foods."

I laughed. "Come on, football boy, I know a great spot for lunch."

Hey everyone!!! I know not much happened but I had a good time getting inside Lexi's head. More is coming from both Lexi and Parker. If you enjoyed this chapter feel free to vote or leave me a comment. If you can't wait I invite you to swing over to Parker's sister Shayna's story in my other book Before the Curtain Opens. Until next time.

---Eliana