Gabi.
 
 
"You did what?" I ask, in disbelief.

"I didn't mean to, I swear." he says. "I accidentally blurted it out when mom asked me if I talked to you lately. I'm so sorry Gabs I promise it was a complete accident."
 
 
"It's okay."

"Really?"

"Yeah." I bite my lip. "I really should've told her. You shouldn't feel sorry, it's completely my fault." I am mad, but I know I shouldn't be. That's why I brushed it off so easily. The logical side of things is that it's my fault. I should've told her, and I should've known something like this was going to happen if I didn't. But I still feel so upset at him, if he wouldn't have blurted it out my mom wouldn't be mad at me.

"I'll talk to you soon then?"

"Yeah."

The line cuts off and I go back to the campfire and sit on Shawn's lap.

"Everything okay?" he asks.

"It's fine." I sigh, leaning back and putting my head in the crook of his neck. At least my mom didn't tell me I had to stop dating him, I would lose my mind.

"Are you cold?" he asks. I shrug.

He picks up a blanket from the bench beside us and wraps it around him, then around me, holding me tight.

He kisses the top of my head. "Better?"

I nod with a smile. "Thank you."

He then peppers me with kisses all over my face and neck, and I laugh a bit, as it tickles. He then connects our lips, and my immediate thought is to resist as he almost has his tongue down my throat again. But I want it too bad to stop him. So, I kiss back with passion, placing my left hand on his cheek. Everything else just seems to fade away.

"Okay we get it, you love each other. No need to show us." Matt jokes, covering us in his vision with his hand.

I plant one last soft kiss on Shawn's lips and he places his arms around me again, holding me close.

He leans into my temple, and I think he's going to kiss me again and my heart starts racing but instead he whispers. "Hey whatever it is, I can help."

I lean into his ear. "It's your birthday, I don't want to ruin it. Plus, it's nothing don't worry."

"It's not nothing, I can tell. But if you don't want to talk right now I'm not going to force you."

I force a smile in return.

Fake it til you make it, Gabi.

⌘

"Hey Lana, I'm taking your car to work okay?" I say as I'm walking out the door.

"Gabi, why do you always use my car? If you need it that much why don't you just get your own?" She asks snottily.

"Why do you think?"

"Umm, because you're taking advantage of me?"

"No. Why would I take advantage of you? Unlike you Lana, I don't have a rich family who can buy me whatever the frick I want. I have to work hard for my money and save up to buy things myself. I'm not a spoiled brat."

"Woah woah woah, you don't have to get so angry." she says defensively.

"Well I am angry. You always assume that everyone's life is as perfect as yours."

"It's not a problem, you can use my car." she changes the subject with her eyes averted, she tries to get her way again by calming me down.

"No, clearly it is a problem." I say, and turn around, taking her keys to her car and I drive to work. It seems like everyone in my life keeps letting me down. Who's next?

⌘

This kind of time is what I like to call my prime thinking time. Whenever I feel a bit overwhelmed with things, I like to separate myself from everyone, turn the music up super loud in my headphones, and walk or sit down so I can think.

My parents and I aren't on good terms right now, especially since my mom found out about Shawn. Then I found out my brother broke his promise to keep me and Shawn as a secret, and Lana made me upset when she expected that I could just buy my own car like that. I mean, I have been using her car a lot and I understand that it isn't exactly right. But what other option do I have? Work is too far to walk every day.

And Shawn. He's been acting weird since his friends have been here... I don't know what's going on but it's not him. But he's been good to me other than that. He's one of the only people I can really trust right now. Well, him and Kenna.

I kick the sand around me, hearing only the music in my ears and the background sound of the waves rolling into the shore. The sun is starting to set so it makes for an even more calming sensation.

When did things ever get so complicated? A few weeks ago my life was perfectly fine. I came here to have a nice relaxing summer away from home, and now it feels like everything has flipped. The whole point of this vacation was to get away from stress, but I don't even know what it's like to be stress free anymore.

I suddenly feel as I've been lifted off my feet, and look up as the culprit kisses my lips.

"Babe, you scared me." I half-laugh, putting a hand on my chest and pulling out my earbuds to shove them in my pocket.

"Sorry, just trying to surprise you." he smiles, putting me back down on my feet. "What's up?"

"Oh, just thinking."

"About what?"

"Everything, I guess."

"Penny for your thoughts?" he raises an eyebrow slightly.

"You wouldn't get your money's worth." I sigh heavily.

He frowns. I know he wants to help but I don't know that he can. "Well, I decided. I'm taking you out tonight." he grins like he's just come up with the best idea in the entire world.

"Oh? Where?"

"I heard there's a carnival at the boardwalk so I thought we could go down for awhile. We haven't gone out just the two of us in a long time so I thought it'd be nice to get out for a bit."

"Sounds fun." I smile.

"It will be." he smirks. "You should probably grab a sweater as well incase it gets cold later."

I shrug. "I'll survive."

"I think you should grab one, it's supposed to get kinda cool." He suggests.

"You don't need to protect me, if I'm cold I'll deal with it." I snap, and when his eyes widen I speak again. "I'm sorry, that was inappropriate. I'll be fine." I say sincerely.

"It's okay, just startled me a bit."

"Now what are we waiting for? Let's go, I'm excited!"

"Okay, geez. A second ago you were bitching to me about not wanting a jacket." He jokes. "Nothing's holding us back from leaving now, I guess." He shrugs. He intertwines our fingers and leads me to the car he rented, and he begins to drive us to the boardwalk.

"I love carnivals." I say in awe as we arrive.

"Me too." he nods in agreement.

"They're so aesthetic."

"True."

He locks the car and we walk, hand in hand, down the boardwalk until we reach the bulk of the activities.

The boardwalk swarms with people. The first thing I spot other than the large ferris wheel near the back is the giant ride right in front of us, called the cyclone.

Shawn notices me eyeing it and smirks. "Do you want to go?" he asks.

I nod with a wide smile.

We wait in the line, it's actually not too long.

Once we get to the front and it's our turn, we rush to get seats beside each other before they're all taken up. The seats go in a circle that is attached to the ride by a pole that will swing is back and forth.

We buckle up and pull down the top harnesses. Soon after, the ground beneath us lowers and we start to swing back and forth slowly. We gain momentum and soon we're above a 90 degree angle with the platform. I feel the adrenaline and the rush as we drop towards the ground and to the other side, and the ride is over too soon.

"That was great." Shawn nods, and I agree.

We end up getting cotton candy, I haven't eaten it in so long and it's my all-time favourite carnival food. Even though it'll rot your teeth.

We share one, and take a cute snapchat and a boomerang for instagram while we're at it, then we go and eat more junk food like some hot dogs and pretzels.

"Hi, how can I win the giant stuffed animal there?" he asks the clerk of an arcade game, leaning on the counter and pointing to the giant Stitch and my smile widens. I didn't think he remembered that Stitch is my favourite.

"You have to throw the ball and get it in the hole 5 times in a row." he explains to Shawn.

20 minutes and many tries later, I have Stitch in my arms as we walk around more. Eventually we head to the car and put him in there though, because he's too big to carry around all night.

We walk around for a little bit and pass several booths and rides.

"Let's ride this one." Shawn suggests, pointing to the large drop tower to our right.

"How about no." I say insistently.

"Oh come on, please? For me?"

"Nope. Not happening."

"Don't make me..." he moves his fingers to my sides and I run. I sprint straight ahead as fast as my legs can take me, weaving through the crowds of people. He was going to tickle me, I knew it.

I look back behind me, and sure enough he's running after me, and he's quickly catching up. I look back ahead of me so I don't run into anyone and, moments later, arms wrap around my waist, and I squeal as I'm being lifted off the ground so effortlessly.

"I caught you." Shawn whispers seductively into my ear, then peppers kisses on my cheek and neck. He makes me so damn happy I can't stop smiling.

"Okay, let's go then." I say, biting my lip as he gives me a questioning look. "On the ride?" I clarify myself.

"Oh, I was just messing with you, I wasn't actually going to make you go on." He reasons with a chuckle.

"Nope. You want to, let's go." I say, taking his hand and walking back towards the ride.

We wait in the line which is only about 5 minutes, then we get into the seats and buckle up.

"Shawn, I'm scared." I say as we almost reach the top of the tower.

He takes my hand and intertwines our fingers. I look into his eyes and I swear I almost forget where we are until we drop and I scream. We finally reach the bottom and I sigh.

"I'm never doing that again." I laugh.

"You didn't like it?"

"No, the ride was great. I mean that I'm never letting you distract me that much ever again." I say, though I can't keep that promise to myself and he knows it.

We continue walking around for awhile as it starts to get dark. We finally reach the Ferris wheel and we look at each other and smile before getting in line. Once it's our turn, we get into a cart and sit down, we're basically spooning while sitting. We start moving and slowly keep going up until we can practically see the entire city of Los Angeles.

"Wow, I don't think I've ever seen something so beautiful." I swoon.

"I have." Shawn objects. "It's you."

"Have you ever thought about what life might be like once you go back home?" I ask out of nowhere.

"Baby, don't think about that. We've still got lots of time, we have to live in the moment."

"I know, but I'm so in love with you I don't know how I'm going to live without you."

He shuts me up as his lips meet mine for a soft kiss until it feels as if nothing's falling apart. "It'll be alright."

a/n:
ik, ik i'm a terrible person for not updating in forever and leaving y'all on a cliffhanger. the next few chapters should be easy to write though so they *should* be up soon!
thanks for reading!
remember to vote and comment!
i love y'all! 💘
~em 💗