"We need to talk," Abel said softly in one of my few waken moments. I was constantly asleep. Everything was tiring. Waking up wore me out and it made me immediately wanna go back to sleep.

"Don't break up with me," I mumbled.

Abel snorted and shook his head. "Not breaking up with you, you dumbass. We need to talk about you taking a sabbatical from school. I need you to sign some papers."

"Why do I need a sabbatical? I haven't been gone that long." I felt a lot more awake than I had for a long time.

"Not yet. But..." He cringed.

"This is gonna take a while, is what you're saying," I said, finishing his sentence for him. It was obvious he was struggling a lot with this conversation.

"I just don't want you to get expelled. I've gotten a doctor's note too, stating you've been in a car accident. So, you should be covered and then when you feel better, you can get back in school."

"Where did you get a doctor's note?" I asked, wanting to latch onto that rather than having to face the fact that I was not coming back to the degree of my dreams.

"I know a vampire who's a doctor. Or well, the network did. But she's legit a doctor. And blood supplier. It has its benefits to have vamps in health care."

"So organised," I said, feeling my eyes closing again. I was ready to sleep again, and Abel got me to snuggle up to him on the sofa.

"Is it freaky?" he asked into my hair.

"No, it's really cool. A secret-"

"Don't say 'secret society'," Abel laughed, interrupting me midsentence.

"Totally wasn't gonna," I murmured my voice giving out me. I couldn't stay awake anymore.

Rain hit against the window with no rhyme or reason. No rhythm at all. I didn't even like looking at the rain. I genuinely hated it. But I couldn't move. I could just lay there and do fuckall. My body was agony and even thinking about moving was too much. Everything was too much. So, I slept. I just slept. More or less the entire time. It was much easier to not be awake than having to think. When I thought about maybe never walking again. Or be pain free. And I didn't want to have those thoughts. Even if Fred kept saying I should stay positive. I didn't wanna stay positive. I wanted to sleep.

Abel would kiss me awake. He'd make me eat. Make me laugh. He'd carry me downstairs and watch telly with me. I'd get to pick all the shows and he'd only object a little. I'd nap against his chest. On top of him. Whatever I could do to get just a little closer I'd do, because I desperately needed to feel him all the time. To make sure he didn't hate me. Or find me burdensome. I was so afraid he'd leave me because I was a burden. I was annoying. I could do nothing on my own. I was a burden. Literally. He had to carry me a lot of the time, since I couldn't bloody walk. I was so tired of it. I was tired of doing nothing. I was tired of not being in school. Not seeing my friends without The Dread.

The dread of having to tell them I was broken. I was no longer functional. Just a sad piece of shit, laying around, doing nothing. Couldn't even feed myself. Could not do shit.

I realised I was being dramatic when I started being able to use my arms. When I started being less tired. I could do more for longer periods of time. It wasn't like when Abel could carry me from the bed, he had woken me up in, down to the sofa and I'd be back asleep. But now I could make the trip down the hall to the top of the stairs. Able would carry me down the stairs and I'd walk to the sofa on my own. I mean, I was in agony the entire time, but the fact I could do it and only cry a little was big to me. Abel was overly excited about it too. He went overboard but it was cute because it was genuine. I could tell it was.

"No, it's good," Fred said. "You are recovering and that in and on itself is a really big deal. We weren't sure there'd be any kind of recovery, remember?"

"Yeah, I just wish it'd go faster. I don't feel it's going fast enough," I muttered, fidgeting with a string on my shorts.

"I know. I'm sorry I can't perform miracles."

I looked up. "What? This isn't on you. You saved my life. I'm just complaining because I'm bored as hell. Like so ridiculously bored," I hurried to say. I didn't want Fred to think I was complaining about her. I was complaining about myself. Because I should be better at recovering. I should've healed way faster. I did heal faster than people due to being a werewolf and all, but it wasn't fast enough. I wasn't healing fast enough.

"Right," she murmured.

I grabbed her hand, making her look at me. "I mean it. You've been wonderful. I don't think anyone else could've done what you've done. Without you, I would've been dead."

"No yeah, pain is good. Reminds you, you're not dead." She sighed deeply and smiled then. "I do wish I could heal you fully. But I don't think that's realistic. It was such a strong wolf trap. But I think you should come by the house and let my mum and sisters have a look. I need a second opinion."

"Will they do magic then?" I asked cheekily and smirked at my friend.

She rolled her eyes. "Maybe. Don't be a weirdo about it."

"I promise no such thing."

I was a complete weirdo about it. I asked super obnoxious questions. Like why one of Fred's sisters would hover a crystal over me and why she wore so many. I could tell they thought I was a fucking moron, but my curiosity got the better of me and to be fair, I had only seen Fred and Abel for ages. I was starving for conversations with other people that wasn't about me and my pain.

"Will it show where the wolfsbane is?" I asked as Fred's sister, Elena, hovered a crystal over my leg.

"Actually yes," she said. "It'll vibrate if it detects anything. Neat, isn't it?" She smiled at me. "Fred said you love magic."

"Yeah, sorry I'm really new to this world still. Lots of things still amaze me." I shrugged a little and widened my eyes at the crystal that started vibrating in Elena's hand.

"And there we go. So, it's in your legs the most. It's where it has settled, and this is where we can no longer flush it out." The mood changed from light-hearted to a heavier one.

"How do you know?" I whispered.

"Because the enchantment on this crystal is made to detect attached wolfsbane." She patted my leg and looked up at her sister. "You were right."

"What were you right about?" I asked, trying to keep it focused on the magic and how cool that was instead how I had literal fucking poison in my legs.

"My theory was that it had spread to your legs and just settled there. I managed to flush so much of it, but it always stopped before we got to the legs. I just couldn't get it out there."

"So, what... we break my legs and then that's it?" I asked, feeling almost hopeful.

"That method only works when it's fresh and raging. Your healing would just attack the break and not the wolfsbane because it has settled now. Like it lives there," Elena explained.

"And it doesn't even pay rent," I huffed, trying to lift the mood. I didn't wanna think about what it all meant. I didn't want them to tell me either. I wanted to keep fucking about and gush over magic. It was so much easier. Then it didn't have to be so serious and that was easier to handle.

Cal handed me a beer from out of nowhere. "This will help."

I looked up at my big friend and took the beer from her. "I'm alright. But I'll never turn down a beer."

"Sure, Gael." She sounded so... soft. Softer than she had ever sounded before.

I took a sip of the bottle. It had to be bad if Cal sounded all soft. If she offered me beer and was all soft. This was serious.

I looked at Abel and he grimaced in a way that supposed to look supportive. It was his supportive face, but it always looked a little weird.