Started on 30.9.2020

Kashish walks to and fro in her room. It is getting on her nerves this whole feeling. She was not used to it; she hasn't yet gotten accustomed to it, she hates it! She remembers she had tried avoiding him, she sincerely did. But this suffocating creature, may be he had some other plans.

How much time does it take one person to understand the other - she wonders! Or is it just she who failed to understand him? Probably yes, it is only her! Because as for this man, he surely managed to get under her skin, know her in and out, or how else would he manage to ruin the calmness of her life?

It started with a single 'NO'!

But at that time, never had Kashish imagined that she would regret saying 'NO' to this man for the rest of her life!

No! The 'no' wasn't a denial of his proposal to her. Frankly, he is not a man who would propose someone directly. He is not a man who would word his feelings in front of others so easily. Well, blame it on him or the circumstances in which he had been brought up, that depends on you, but putting his feelings in front of someone so easily, isn't his thing.

Rather the 'no' was her denial to him from buying that last medicine that both she and this man were in need of that evening.

*Flashback*

Kashish walks into the pharmacy carrying bag filled with groceries.

Sujal happens to stop his car at that very moment in front of the same pharmacy and walks into the pharmacy.

"Ji kahiye?",

asks the pharmacist.

"Multivitamin capsules.",

comes the voice of Kashish and Sujal in unison, whilst Sujal enters into the pharmacy.

That comes as a surprise for both - the pharmacist and Kashish.

Kashish turns to look towards the bearer of the voice and her eyes rest on Sujal for the first time.

Kashish comes to know of Sujal's existence in the world for the first time that moment!

Sujal yet hasn't acknowledged Kashish though. He is a minute or two late to learn about her existence in the world! He looks towards Kashish just like any stranger would look towards a fellow stranger. Not a single string of his heart gets vibrated even after looking towards her.

He is not a person to fall in love at first sight. He doesn't fall for beauty; he falls for what the person is from within. How the person look towards his or her life - holds greatest importance to him.

"Fifty rupees. Sorry lekin ek hi bachi hui hai.",

says the pharmacist, looking towards Sujal and Kashish.

Immediately Sujal and Kashish begin to fish for money into their respective purses.

"Excuse me, can I have change?",

asks Kashish, turning to look towards Sujal forwarding a fifty rupee note for change.

The innocent Sujal, gets into the trap of Kashish and gives to her the change she asked for.

Accepting the change, Kashish quickly forwards the money to the pharmacist and taking away the medicine she walks out of the shop after saying,

"Thank you!"

Sujal stares her in utter disbelief realizing that she played with him; his innocent feelings!

As she climbs down the flight of stairs of the shop, she doesn't realize when her right foot twitches and she falls down, shouting,

"Aaa...!"

Still inside the shop, Sujal stares her further in new shock!

"Paise?",

asks Kashish, in confusion, accepting the money skeptically.

Staring Kashish throughout, keeping a cold look on on his face, Sujal picks up the bottle of multivitamins capsule, getting up he leaves.

Kashish glares him, realizing what smartness did he show!

*Flashback ends*

He is a liar! He is a player! She concludes out of frustration.

*****

Occupying a chair at the bar of a lavish restaurant where the loud voice of people overpower the jukebox, Sujal traces the circumference of the top outer circle of his glass which is filled with liquor. In his mind the clouds of thoughts of his employee Kashish Sinha, remains filled!

It was a harsh 'no' to her innocent and sweet proposal!

Sujal remembers vividly how Kashish went pale upon hearing his denial!

He is hating himself for making Kashish to feel that way.

The rage in his eyes isn't for someone else, but for himself.

He wants to punish himself for hurting her feelings. He won't talk to her! This is the most severe punishment he can deserve for the offence he committed by denying what she deserves - his presence in her life; his strength at the times of need; his love that is meant only and only to be showered on her and no one else. Yet, he is here after gifting her with an ache of unacceptance from his side!

He heard what she said - 'Pyar karti hun aapse!'

But she couldn't hear or read what he didn't say or express in any other way - 'Main bhi!'

Sujal empties his glass in a single go, letting the alcohol to give his throat the burning sensation. That could be taken as his punishment for uttering every harsh word that he has said to her -

'Tumhe kya laga, main tumhe touch karna chahta hoon? Tum apne aap ko kya samjhti ho? Kya ho tum? Aap uss type ki ladki nahi hain! Lekin main... Main uss type ka ladka hun! Meri bohot si ladkiyon ke saath mein relationship hai. Sari duniya janti hai. Aapne bhi suna hoga. Tum touch karne ki baat kar rahi ho? Iss samay iss office mein koi bhi nahi hai. Main kuch bhi kar sakta hun. Main aisa kar bhi sakta hun! Sub yahi kahenge ke tum itni raat office mein kya kar rahi thi? Koi believe nahi karega ki tumne apne aap ko bachane ki koshish bhi ki thi. Lekin main... aisa... kuch nahi karunga! Kyunki subse pehli baat to ye ki mujhe tum mein koi diljaspi nahi hai. Aur dusri baat ye that you are not my type of a girl! Main ladkiyon ke peeche nahi bhagta hoon! Ladkiyan mere peeche bhagti hain! Agar tumhe apne barey mein koi galatfehmi hai to usse nikal do! Kyunki agar tum duniya ki akhri ladki bhi hogi na to bhi main tumhe kabhi pasand nahi karunga. Isliye aaj ke baad mere saath iss tarah ki harkatein mat karna! Do you understand?'

(Sujal's background music begins)

'Tod diya maine tumhara dil Kashish. Jiski taraf mera dil aur mere kadam khichey chale jate hain; aaj unn kadmon ko hi khud tak aney se rok diya maine!',

thinks Sujal.

'Mujh jaisa complicated insaan tum jaise innocent ke liye nahi bana Kashish. You deserve better than me!',

he thinks further.

He understands that she had stayed patient this long! It wasn't easy for her to decide to blurt out her innocent feeling for him all of a sudden. It was rather him who provoked her somehow to do that!

'Meri uljhi hui zindagi se judogi to tum bhi ulajh kar reh jaogi.',

Sujal cascades his eyes and smirks sadly.

*****

Sujal gets out of his cabin and searches for Kashish but finds her nowhere.

Stopping one of his employees, he asks her,

"Ahmm... Aaj Kashish nahi ayi kya?"

"Sir wo Piyush Sir ke cabin mein hai.",

replies the employee.

Sujal's cheeks warm up as his heart flutters by the fact that finally he is about to see Kashish.

"Theek hai. Thank you.",

he smiles politely.

Sujal walks to Piyush's cabin. Upon opening the door Sujal's rate of heartbeat picks up pace as he finally finds Kashish in front of his eyes. He doesn't let his satisfaction of seeing her to come on his face. He knows how to keep his emotions under control, he has done it for all these years, kept his emotions under control. His face turns straight, as if he has nothing to do with Kashish's presence there in the cabin. Whereas inside only he knows that he has everything to do with her presence. In fact he is here to feel her presence around himself. To know how his presence affect her.

"Arey Sujal, aao na.",

smiles Piyush.

Kashish whose back was turned towards Sujal, and who was reading a file, suddenly turns rigid for a brief moment upon hearing Piyush's words. Her cheeks warm up immediately, merely by hearing Sujal's name. Such is the affect of Sujal on her. Sujal looks towards Kashish for a brief moment to know whether she turns to look towards him on hearing his name or not. But to his utter surprise, she doesn't, as if she hasn't heard Piyush or Sujal's presence there doesn't affect her at all.

Sujal enters the cabin, staring Kashish for a brief moment whilst walking towards Piyush's desk, then occupies the seat in front of Piyush's seat.

"Bus thoda sa kaam bacha hai ye wala, tum tab tak baitho.",

smiles Piyush.

Sujal looks towards Kashish, who has turned her face to her left, her mind focused on Sujal.

"Ahmm.... Piyush maine ye read kar liya hai. Bus ek baar Lalit Sir ko dikhana hai.",

says Kashish.

"Lao main dikha deta hun, waise bhi mujhe unse thoda kaam hai.",

smiles Piyush.

"Sujal, don't mind main thodi der mein aata hun.",

smiles Piyush, getting up.

Sujal nods his head in affirmative.

As Piyush leaves the cabin, Kashish takes a deep breath, turning she begins to arrange rest of the files ignoring Sujal. But deep down she understands that now that they are alone, Sujal would definitely try to talk to her. She wants to escape the situation but she knows she is stuck!

"Kal jo kuch bhi hua...",

Sujal begins the conversation, keeping his eyes lowered.

Kashish gets nervous and quickly intervenes,

"Bewakufi thi meri, I realized!"

Anger surges through Sujal on hearing that. He stares Kashish whose back is still turned towards him to ignore a direct eye contact with him.

"Ek pal ke liye soch liya tha ke bhaley hi apki zindagi mein kitni bhi ladkiyan aye-jaye, magar mujhe.... mujhe aap samjhenge. Mere juzzbaatton ko samjhenge.",

says Kashish, hurt, knitting her brows.

Smirking, not wanting to disclose his innate feelings for Kashish, Sujal says,

"Main harr ladki ke juzzbaatt samjhta hun!"

Kashish's eyes fill up with tears hearing that, but she controls herself.

"Hmm... shayad main hi apko nahi samjh payi.",

says Kashish, regretting that she put her feelings for him in front of him.

Sujal stares her possessively, but Kashish missed witnessing the possessiveness in his eyes as she doesn't turn to look at him.

"Samjhogi to tab na jab tum mere saath kuch pal bitaogi!",

taunts Sujal.

Kashish's heart skips a beat hearing that. Knitting her brows tighter she says,

"Agar koi jaanbujh kar mujhe khud se durr karta rahe baar baar to iss mein main kya kar sakti hun? Main baar baar uske paas nahi ja sakti jisse mujhe ye vibes miley ke usse mera uske saath hona pasand hi nahi"

That irks Sujal!

Smirking, he says,

"Ye bahane kisi aur ke samne banana. Piyush ko samjhne se fursat miley tab na kahin tum mujhe samjhne ki koshish karogi na."

That comes as a shock for Kashish. She stares Sujal in utter shock.

Sujal realizes by her expression that he shouldn't have said that.

"Mujhe apse kuch kehna hi nahi hai ab.",

says Kashish out of anger.

Kashish turns to leave but Sujal stops her, holding her by her upper arm.

"Kashish mera wo matlab nahi tha...",

Sujal tries to mend what he has damaged - their relationship.

"Rehne dijiye Sir, mujhe kuch nahi sunna.",

says Kashish, giving him a sad stare and leaves.

'Ye dard jo tumhe deta hun wo tumhe khudse durr karne ke liye deta hun Kashish. Fir kyun, tumhe dard dekar mujhe itni takleef hoti hai?',

thinks Sujal, frustrated.

****

Walking to the washroom Kashish bursts into tears.

'Janti hun ke apki zindagi mein kayi ladkiyan hain. Kisi ek ke saath rishte mein bandhna apko pasand nahi. Magar kyun, kyun jab bhi apki ankhon mein dekhti hun to unn mein mujhe ek sunapan nazar aata hai? Wo sunapan jo mujhe apni zindagi mein bhi mehsus hoti hai. Kyun uss sunepan ko gehrayi se samjhne ko jee karta hai? Kyun apke uss har ankahe juzzbaatt ko sunn leyne ko ji karta hai?'

Kashish shoves her hands into her hair, out of frustration.

Getting out of the washroom, Kashish heads towards her seat when Sujal happens to walk out of his cabin and his eyes fall on Kashish. He immediately knits his brows realizing that she had cried. Her puffed up eyes disturb Sujal.

Walking to Kashish, he rests his hand on her desk, staring her sternly.

Kashish's heart skips a beat upon discovering him there. She looks towards him initially, then slowly cascades her eyes, hesitantly.

Sujal keeps staring her, all seriously, keeping his brows knit.

"Mere cabin mein aao!",

says Sujal, sternly.

"Ahmm.... mujhe ye kaam complete...",

Kashish begins to give excuse but Sujal intervenes,

"Jaisa maine kaha hai waisa karo!"

Kashish turns timid upon hearing his words. She looks towards him, speechless.

Sujal stares back, warning her by his expression to not mess with him. Giving her one last warning look, Sujal turns to leave for his cabin. Kashish looks away, feeling suffocated.

*****

She pushes the door of his cabin lightly and looks towards him. Sujal looks up towards her. Kashish cascades her eyes and enters.

Standing in front of him, across the desk, Kashish waits for him to say whatever he needs to say.

Sujal keeps staring her, all serious.

Kashish feels uncomfortable under his constant gaze.

"Kal jab tumhe phone kiya tha to tumne baat kyun nahi ki thi?",

asks Sujal, in an authorotative voice.

Kashish gets nervous upon hearing his question, she doesn't look towards him.

"Wo... main so gayi thi. Sir dard kar raha tha.",

Kashish gives him excuse.

"Ab kaisi ho?",

asks Sujal, turning polite.

Kashish's heart clenches hearing his politeness. It makes her to turn emotional, his sudden change in tone. But she controls herself, as she doesn't want to show herself as weak in front of him.

"Theek hun.",

Says Kashish, looking towards Sujal.

They stare each other. Their stare gradually turns intimate. Kashish begins to feel uncomfortable and cascades her eyes.

Kashish could read his feelings for her in his eyes clearly. Then why is he trying to deny his feelings for her? – the thought suffocates her. She looks away.

"Aap mujhse badla le rahe hain na?",

Kashish puts her doubt in front of Sujal, staring him, knitting her brows.

Her question confuses Sujal and he knits his brows,

"Badla?"

"Humari pehli mulaqat mein jo kuch bhi hua...",

Kashish trails off, frustrated.

That comes as a shock for Sujal. Is she really taking this as his revenge for such a minute incident that took place between them on their first meeting?

Kashish stares him and his expression makes her feel  guilty. So this is not what he is doing! He is taking no revenge from her.

"Purani baaton ko pakad kar baithna meri fitrat nahi Kashish. Especially tab jab tum mere liye ek ajnabi thi.",

says Sujal, staring her all seriously.

Kashish smirks and says,

"Ajnabi to main aaj bhi hun apke liye!",

she taunts.

Her words pierce Sujal's heart.

Sujal  glares her for saying so.

"Ek ajnabi se pyar hona; uske samne apne juzzbaaton ka izhar karna, kya ye itna aasan hai tumhare liye Kashish?",

asks Sujal.

Kashish stares him, pondering into his words, then says,

"Aap mere liye ek paheli hain!",

she confesses, staring Sujal in awe!

That comes as a surprise for Sujal.

"Jisse jitna main suljhane ki koshish karti hun, wo utni hi ulajhti rehti hai.",

says Kashish, staring him as if he is some far fetched dream.

"Mujhe samjhne ke liye mere paas aana zaruri hai Kashish. Jo karne ki himmat...",

Sujal shakes his head, staring her throughout, then continues,

"Tum mein nahi!"

Shivers run down Kashish's spine.

Kashish begins to reply to him when Sujal orders her,

"Baith jao!"

Kashish feels irritated by his order.

"Main theek hun.",

she says in irritation.

"Baitho Kashish!",

orders Sujal, giving her  warning look.

Sighing, Kashish takes her seat in front of him.

"Theek kaha aapne. Nahi hai mujh mein itni himmat ke jiske liye meri koi ahmiyat nahi main uske paas jaun zabardasti.",

says Kashish, knitting her brows tighter.

Sujal smiles infectiously, staring Kashish throughout.

Kashish suddenly goes self conscious. Her cheeks turn warm and she wonders what made him to smile and stare her like that?

"Coffee piyogi?",

asks Sujal, taking Kashish by surprise, smiling sweetly at her.

Kashish stares him in utter shock. What kind of a person is he? At one end he wants to stay adamant at showing that he has no feeling for her and on the other hand here he is showing his concern for her by asking her for coffee?

Kashish shakes her head in slow motion, staring Sujal in utter shock and asks him,

"Aap kyun kar rahe hain ye?"

Sujal acts to be innocent and asks,

"Kya coffee ke liye kyun puch raha hun?"

Kashish goes speechless.

"Mujhe laga tum itna gussa karke thak gayi hogi to puch lun tumhe coffee ke liye.",

says Sujal, as if it is such a simple thing that Kashish couldn't understand and rather made it so complicated.

"Mujhe laga jo baat humne zubaan se nahi kahi uss baat ka ehsaas hai hum dono ko.",

smiles Sujal, staring her.

Kashish's heart flutters hearing that.

"Batao Kashish, kya nahi hai tumhe ehsaas mere juzzbaaton ka?",

asks Sujal, smiling, staring her lovingly.

Kashish stares back warmly at Sujal.

Cascading his eyes, Sujal asks hesitantly,

"Kal kyunki maine tumhe apna jawab nahi diya to tum iss nateeje par pohnch gayi ke main heartless hun; nahi samjhta kisike juzzbaatton ko."

Kashish cascades her eyes feeling guilty. She slowly again looks towards Sujal and asks him,

"Aap hi bataiye kya mera ye sochna sahi nahi tha?"

Sujal looks towards Kashish but doesn't say anything.

"Jab hum kisi rishte mein bandhte hain, chahe rishta jo bhi ho, dono ko koshish karni hoti hai uss rishte ko nibhane ki.",

Kashish begins to explain.

Sujal stares her, listening to her; understanding her.

"Agar aap apne juzzbaatt mere liye mere samne rakh dein aur main uss baat par react na karun, to apko kaisa mehsus hoga?",

asks Kashish, politely.

"Bardasht nahi kar paunga!",

says Sujal, his eyes reflecting his anger merely at the thought of what Kashish said.

Smiling sadly, Kashish says,

"Iss baat ki soch tak apse bardasht nahi ho rahi. To aap meri sochiye, mujh par kya beet rahi hogi jab main ye actually face kar rahi hun."

Sujal's heart clenches hearing that.

Smiling sarcastically, Kashish asks,

"Apko kya lagta hai apke samne apne juzzbaaton ka izzhar karna mere liye aasan tha?"

Sujal's rate of heartbeat picks up pace.

"Main manti hun ke shuru mein humare beech arguments hue; differences rahe, maine apko jawab dene mein kabhi hesitate nahi kiya. Magar iska matlab ye nahi hai Sir ke apke samne apne pyar ka izzhar karne se pehle mera dil nahi ghabraya; mere honth nahi kaampein.",

says Kashish, at the verge of having tears.

Sujal clenches his hands hearing her.

"Aur naahi ye ke ek hi pal mein maine decide kar liya ke main apke samne apne pyar ka izzhar karungi.",

cries Kashish.

Sujal's anxiety increases but he acts to remain calm in front of Kashish.

"Kitni baar...",

Kashish turns soft all over again.

Sujal's face turns all the more rigid in order to hide his emotions for her from her.

"Kitni baar mauka diya apko...",

Kashish stares him expectantly.

Sujal's feelings for Kashish increases further, hearing that. But he still stays calm. Such a control freak he is!

This suffocates Kashish further when she doesn't receive the desired expressions from Sujal. She silently concludes that he has no feelings for her. Her heart breaks! But still she decides to open up her heart in front of him, if this is the first and the last time they are having this discussion.

"Magar shayad apko sirf saaf-saaf kahi gayi baat hi sunni aati hai. Bina kuch kahe juzzbaaton ko sunn leyna to apne seekha hi nahi!",

accuses Kashish, staring him out of anger.

Sujal still doesn't say anything.

Kashish drowns into the pool of his eyes and says softly,

"Apko pata hai, mujhe apki ankhon mein dekhne se darr lagta hai!"

That catches Sujal's interest further. He adjusts in his seat, eager to hear her. Entwining his fingers, rests his hands on the tip of his nose. His stare on Kashish automatically turns possessive hearing that.

Kashish shivers as she realises that his stare has turned possessive on her. She cascades her eyes hesitantly and goes numb.

When she doesn't reply for a few moments, Sujal encourages her by saying,

"Main sunn raha hun Kashish."

Kashish still stays quite too hesitant to say anything.

"Kamal hai Kashish jab main tumhe sunna avoid kar raha tha to tumhare dimag mein; tumhare....",

he pauses, gauging at her reaction before adding,

"...dil mein..."

Kashish's breath turns shallow hearing that. Sujal doesn't fail to take notice of it and smiles in satisfaction upon receiving the desired result.

"Na jane kya kya juzzbaatt umad rahe the. Wo juzzbaatt jinhe tum mujhse baantne ke liye betaab thi. Aur ab jab main tumhare samne hun; tumhe apna waqt de raha hun; tumhe sunn raha hun, to tum yun khamosh ho gayi achanak!",

teases Sujal, smiling infectiously.

"Aisa kya hai meri ankhon mein Kashish jisse parh lene se tumhe darr lagta hai?",

Sujal smiles infectiously, challenging her to reply to that.

Kashish shivers again hearing the tone of challenge in his question.

"Jab mann chahe aap mujhe lekar protective ho jate hain; mujh par bina kisi hesitation ke haq jatate hain...."

They stare each other both remembering several moments when he actually did what she is saying.

"Aur jab mann chahe aap mujhse aise bartaw karte hain jaise main apke liye apki dusri employees ki tarah hi hun!",

Kashish's eyes fill with fresh new tears but she controls her emotions somehow.

Sujal knits his brows as her getting emotional pierces his heart.

Shaking her head she gets up to leave, frustrated. Sujal stares her going and suddenly calls her,

"Sunno!"

Kashish stops abruptly but doesn't turn to acknowledge him and says in frustration and sadness,

"Mujhe kuch nahi sunna. Jo sunna hai wo aap kabhi kahenge nahi."

"Keh dunga! Ek din keh dunga! Intezaar kar sakti ho?",

asks Sujal, hiding his anxiousness as always.

His words surprise Kashish. She knits her brows in confusion and consideration. Turning she asks him,

"Kab tak?"

The innocence; her emotions for him, reflect in her question. Sujal smiles hearing that.

"Wo tum par depend karega Kashish!",

Sujal confuses her further, smiling challengingly at her.

"Mujh par?",

asks Kashish in confusion.

Staring her throughout, smiling infectiously at her Sujal nods his head in affirmative.

"Dekhna chahta hun kab tak apne juzzbaatton ko apne dil mein chupa kar mera saath de sakti ho.",

challenges Sujal, smiling infectiously still.

Kashish stares him in utter shock.

"Dosti, humare beech to kabhi dosti hui hi nahi Kashish.",

reminds Sujal.

Kashish wonders where is he going with this.

"Dosti se shuruat karein?",

Sujal smiles infectiously at her.

Kashish knits her brows tighter.

"Kya hua? Darr gayi?",

teases Sujal, smiling infectiously at her.

Kashish stares Sujal, speechless.

"Mujhe laga aap dost itni asani se banate nahi.",

says Kashish, knitting her brows.

Sujal smirks and says,

"Haan nahi banata. Magar wo rishta jo tum chahti ho humare beech uss rishte tak pohnchne ke liye humein dost to banna hi parhegana pehle?"

His words irk Kashish. She feels as if she is desperate to be friends with him. She confesses about the same in front of him.

"Mujhe aisa lag raha hai jaise main desperate ho rahi hun apse dosti karne ke liye aur aap mujhe bheekh mein apni dosti de rahe hain!"

Her words hurt Sujal. But he chooses not to show it to her.

"To kya nahi ho rahi?",

he asks her, smiling at her challengingly.

Keh rahi hain jo meri ankhein,
kyun usse jhutla rahe ho?
Apni inn baaton se kyun,
dil mera dukha rahe ho?
Ek dor se dil mera,
tere dil se jud raha.
Teri dhadkane keh rahin,
wo jo tu na keh saka.
Tut ke bikhar na jaun,
ho...
tujhse na kahin durr ho jaun,
itni bhi na de saza.
Tujhse hi pyar hua hai,
oh mere saathi.
Thodasa pyar hua hai,
thoda hai baki.

"Iss mein kuch galat bhi to nahi Kashish.",

smiles Sujal.

His words gives Kashish courage. She gets ensured that he is not overthinking  about this situation.

"Ek taraf tum chahti ho ke main tumse saaf saaf har baat kahun. Meri chuppi tumse bardasht nahi ho rahi. Aur ek taraf jab main tumhe saaf saaf keh raha hun ke main kya chahta hun, to tumhe aisa kyun lag raha hai Kashish ke main tumhare barey mein kuch galat soch raha hun?",

asks Sujal.

Kashish's heart skips a beat hearing that.

"Playboy! User! Aise kayi naam mile hue hain mujhe Kashish!",

Sujal doesn't feel ashamed to word them in front of Kashish.

"Kya tum taiyar ho ek aise insaan ke saath apna waqt guzarne ke liye? Usse samjhne ke liye?",

challenges Sujal.

"Aap nahi hain ye sub!",

says Kashish, slowly, staring Sujal throughout, as if she could read him aptly.

The confidence; the trust her words reflect for him, make Sujal to shiver in shock and amazement.

He goes speechless, staring her throughout.

"Aap wo nahi hain jo aap dusro ke samne bante hain!",

says Kashish, trying to read him.

Sujal turns self conscious and lowers his eyes.

"Aur yahi baat mujhe apki taraf kheenchti hai!",

confesses Kashish.

Sujal stares her in amazement, hearing that.

"Aap subko wo sunate hain jo wo sunna chahte hain. Aap subke samne wo chehra dikhate hain apna jaisa wo dekhna chahte hain.",

says Kashish, shocked and confused.

Sujal feels uncomfortable hearing her.

"Aap... aap kyun karte hain aisa magar?",

she asks him, feeling suffocated.

"Taki koi mere paas na aye!",

says Sujal, making a stone face, looking away.

His words hurt Kashish. She retorts,

"Lekin main to aa rahi hun!"

Her innocent yet confident reply surprises Sujal. He falls in dilemma about how to get out of the situation. But does he really want to get out of the situation? Maybe not!

"Kashish mere paas aakar tumhe siwaye dukh ke kuch nahi milega!",

warns Sujal.

Smirking, Kashish says,

"Apse kisne kaha ke mujhe apni zindagi mein khushiyon ki aadat hai?"

That shocks Sujal!

"Meri zindagi mein bhi dard, dukh ke alawa kuch nahi hai.",

confesses Kashish, smiling sadly.

"Fir kyun tum mere paas aakar apne dukh barha rahi ho Kashish?",

asks Sujal, finding her acting stupid by trying to be friends with him.

"Kyunki maine jo apki ankahi baat sunn li hai; uske baad aapse durr jana, mujhe nahi lagta mujhse ho payega.",

Kashish shakes her head whilst saying so.

"Dard! Dukh! Takleef aur barhenge.",

warns Sujal, knitting his brows.

Kashish changes his negative words into positive,

"Dard! Dukh! Takleef mil kar baantenge.",

smiles Kashish.

Sujal's heart clenches hearing that.

"Bohot gussa hai mujh mein. Tum jhel nahi paogi.",

smiles Sujal, warning her and at the same time challenging her.

"Bohot patience hai mujh mein. Hairan reh jayenge.",

replies Kashish, smiling confidently.

Sujal's heart warms hearing that.

"Aap ek kadam barha kar to dekhiye. Saath nibhane ka waada karti hun apse.",

says Kashish, her eyes turn soft on him.

Sujal stares back, giving her a warm and possessive stare.

*****

Sujal takes his time to think about what Kashish said. He then asks,

"Agar main tumhari baat maan lun, to kya guarantee hai ke tum mujhe dhokha nahi dogi?",

asks Sujal, all serious.

His words pierce Kashish's heart.

She knits her brows and stares him, trying to read his pain. 

Sujal gets self conscious and feels uncomfortable by her constant gaze.

"Apko aisa lagta hai ke main apko dhokha dungi?",

asks Kashish, shocked.

Sujal's cheeks warm up, feeling guilty.

"Sub dete hain!",

says Sujal, hesitantly. His cheeks warming up further.

Kashish keeps staring him, glad that she could get insight of him.

Sujal looks away as the honesty in Kashish's eyes that he witnesses irritates him. He doesn't want to fall for those innocent eyes of Kashish's that somehow manage to attract him towards themselves each time Kashish looks towards Sujal.

"Nahi Sir, sub nahi dete.",

says Kashish, softly, staring him.

Sujal doesn't turn to look towards her.

"Wo... jinhe ehsaas ho dhokha, dard, akelapan kya hota hai wo nahi dete.",

says Kashish.

Sujal turns to look towards Kashish, trying to read her.

"Kya tumhe kisi ne dhokha diya Kashish?",

asks Sujal, concerned, knitting his brows.

Kashish smiles and says,

"Dhokha to tab dega na koi mujhe jab main kisi ko apne paas ane dungi. Kisi ko khud par haq jatane dungi."

Sujal stares Kashish. Her words succeed in relaxing him. He smiles a little. Kashish smiles back.

Suddenly Sujal's interest in Kashish develops. He gets eager to learn about her.

"Haan magar.... dard aur akelepan ko janti hun!",

smiles Kashish, sadly.

That hurts Sujal. The fact that Kashish is hurt, becomes too much for Sujal to endure.

Taking a deep breath, Kashish smiles looking towards Sujal and says,

"Apke dard aur akelepan ko bantna chahti hun."

Sujal's heart clenches hearing that.

Staring Sujal throughout, Kashish says,

"Wo sub sunn leyna chahti hun jo apke barey mein main ab tak nahi janti."

Smiling sarcastically, Sujal says,

"Sochlo ek baar agar iss raste par tumhare kadam barh gaye to peeche jane ko nahi milega."

Smiling sarcastically herself, Kashish replies,

"Shayad main peeche jana hi  nahi chahti!"

Sujal keeps staring Kashish, lovingly. Kashish stares back, challengingly.

"Tum kyun mujhe apne kadam uss aur le jane ko majboor kar rahi ho jahan ka raasta mujhe pata hai sirf dard aur takleef se bhara hai?",

asks Sujal, his eyes filled with pain.

Kashish shudders witnessing the pain in his eyes.

"Kabhi kabar kuch baatein sunn leyne par bhi unn par yakeen nahi kiya jaa pata. Yakeen karne ke liye unhe mehsus karna zaruri hota hai.",

says Kashish, getting up and walking towards Sujal.

Sujal too gets up, hypnotized by Kashish.

Getting closer to him, Kashish says in a hushed voice,

"Aur unhe mehsus karne ke liye, agey barhna zaruri hai."

Sujal goes to her side, staring Kashish throughout.

Getting self conscious and nervous, Kashish begins to take backward steps. Her rate of heartbeat increases further with his each step that descends towards her, diminishing the gap between them.

"Aap... ye...",

says Kashish, getting nervous as the distance between them begins to diminish.

"Agey barh raha hun!",

Sujal completes for her, staring her possessively.

Kashish's eyes well up hearing him and witnessing his feelings for her in his eyes. The fact that he won't confess his true feelings for her suffocates Kashish. The fact that she wouldn't dare confessing about her feelings for him again, irritates her too.

Cascading her eyes out of nervousness and shyness, Kashish shakes her head into negative and says,

"Main apko kisi cheez ke liye majboor nahi karna chahti."

"Tum kar bhi nahi sakti.",

smiles Sujal.

Kashish looks towards Sujal, feeling offended.

Sujal smiles witnessing her reaction.

"Main sunn pa raha hun Kashish... wo sub kuch jo tum apni zubaan se nahi keh pa rahi.",

Sujal lets her know.

Kashish feels overwhelmed by his words.

"Tumhari paheli tumhare samne hai. Ab zindagi bhar suljhati rehna, koi jaldbazi nahi hai.",

smiles Sujal.

Kashish smiles too, her eyes turn teary, they keep staring each other with love.

Unable to control herself any longer, Kashish embraces Sujal into a warm hug. Sujal embraces her back, closing his eyes, feeling her in his embrace.

The discussion that started with 'friendship' when shifted to something else, they fail to realize. Such is the power of emotions. Sometimes, it is not necessary to put your true feelings for each other into words. Sometimes skipping the formal confession of feelings has its own joy. Sometimes to hear ones feelings, it is not necessary for the person to put it into words in front of you. All you need to have is trust and faith in the person that he or she would understand what your heart is holding for that person. And the trust and faith should be mutual! But is it a wise choice? Is it not torturing your partner by not confessing in front of that person what you truly feel for them? How much time does it take one to trust another person when it comes to matters such as these? How much time does it take to take a leap of faith and move forward in your friendship?

What has got started between Sujal and Kashish today is a slow process of understanding each other; trusting each other; making each other an integral part of one's life. Sacrifice shall play a key role in the development of this beautiful relationship between them. Hearing the unsaid will help them to know each other better. Not every time one can expect from the other to go verbal about his or her feelings. How much can one understand the other, despite his or her staying quiet is a test that needs to be passed by both, to get the bonding go stronger!

Not all relationships begin with a formal confession. Unconfessed relationship has its own beauty. All one needs to have is an understanding of emotions. And here both Sujal and Kashish have it in ample. The slow pace of their relationship would never be an issue for any of them!

-THE END-

(3.11.2020)