Shane = Bold

Cleo = Italics

"From now on we refer to my girlfriend as Harley Quinn."

"Why on earth would we do that? Harley Quinn isn't exactly girlfriend material."

"That's th-"

"Unless you're into sadistic, totally bad ass, psychotic, detrimental, violent, ever so slightly awesome blonde chicks with really cool hair dye."

"You pretty much just described my girlfriend."

"So you're in love with a girl who tends to act like Harley Quinn?"

"Pretty much."

"That explains a lot."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That I now understand why your relationship is deemed as complicated."

"Super-girl can we please just agree that you have no clue what the state of my relationship is? "

"Let me guess: she's one of those 'you can't love me' chicks."

"..."

"What?"

"That was actually spot on."

"Really?"

"Really. How did you know?"

"I read a lot of teen fiction books."

"You must have more free time than you let on. Don't you have parties to go to rather than holed up at home reading a book?"

"No."

"Really, Super-girl so much of a social outcast that she doesn't get invited to parties?"

"Kinda the opposite actually."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"I got bored of it."

"Of what?"

"The whole party scene. I went to so many that I realized the horrifying truth."

"What horrifying truth?"

"It is literally just a place for teenagers to get drunk, get laid, forget their troubles for a couple of hours and wake up with a killer headache in the morning. And do you know what the worst part is?"

"What?"

"Do you agree that the most common thing that goes on at parties is binge drinking?"

"...I guess."

"I did my research Lost Boy. The more you drink the more likely you are to commit suicide."

"..."

"That was directed at you."

"I know. A bit blunt though, don't you think?"

"Well, I wasn't getting anywhere with my other techniques."

"Techniques for what?"

"Getting it through your thick skull the suicide is a horrific idea."

"How did you know I drunk?"

"I didn't. It was a guess. I'm now going to take another one and say that you're one for the party scene."

"I guess you could say that."

"It's basic psychology. Sadness leads to one drink. One drink leads to more drinks. More drinks lead to more drinks. More drinks lead to depression. Depression leads to suicide."

"What are you, a therapist?"

"Nope. I just happen to be an observant person."

"You've seen someone go through the process of depression before?"

"...not exactly."

"Let me guess, you read about it?"

"Exactly."

"Well, that theory isn't true for everyone. It's stereotypical."

"What do you mean?"

"Do you suppose the author of that book ever went through the thought process of committing suicide?"

"Well, no but-"

"Exactly. That process is general Super-girl. It doesn't work the same way for everyone."

"So you're saying that you didn't go down that chain reaction?"

"Well...I did. Sort of. I just skipped a step."

"Which step was that?"

"Depression."

"So you're not depressed?"

"No."

"What are you then? There must be something driving you to the edge of committing something as big as suicide. If it's not depression then what is it?"

"I have no idea."

"There has to be something, otherwise you wouldn't be considering it."

"I honestly don't know."

"Well think then, maybe it will help. What seems to be the problem? How do you feel right now?"

"Angry."

"Why?"

"That's confidential information."

"Alright...how did you feel yesterday?"

"Angry."

"Why?

"Because my girlfriend had cheated on me. Again. For the second time this month."

"A-and how did you feel towards her."

"I loved her."

"Okay. Right. How did you feel the day before that?"

"Angry."

"Why?"

"Because I cheated on my girlfriend for the first time."

"The day before that?"

"Angry."

"Why?"

"Because I punched my bedroom wall so hard that it left a dent and my knuckles bleeding."

"There it is."

"What?"

"You're right; it isn't depression."

"Stop being so cryptic."

"You're angry. At everything. From what you've just told me it seems to be your sole emotion."

"What's wrong with being angry? I have the right to be. My whole life is a mess. Why can't I be angry?"

"Because anger's toxic. The more you feel it the more you'll want to feel it. It's not healthy."

"That's crazy talk."

"I've taken a psychology course Lost Boy. Anger is like a drug. You become addicted to it. Thus creating more stuff to be angry about."

"Are you implying that it's my fault?"

"Not entirely but perhaps if you just tried t-"

"Shut up."

"I'm just trying to help."

"I already told you; that's exactly what I don't want."