"How did you even manage to do all this? I was only gone a few days," Emmeline finally managed to squeak out. What else could she say? All the bravado she had acquired during her labor was gone along with the energy she had.

Amy took this as approval and launched into an in-depth explanation of how she had pulled it off. Her words floated over Emmeline's head as she kept saying to herself, Dory-style, keep smiling, just keep smiling. The phone ringing downstairs finally released them from Amy's clutches, and as soon she left, Emmeline wiped her hand across her forehead and mouthed "Phew" to Nicholas.

They settled Millie into her sugary-sweet room. Emmeline tried to remind herself that her mother's intentions were good, even if the execution was severely flawed, as she went through the drawers seeing everything Amy had done. Besides, it wasn't like she could afford to do something special like this for Millie herself.

As the days wore on, she and her daughter settled into an ever-shifting routine of diapers, tears, and feedings. Millie seemed hungrier at night, leaving Emmeline a sleep-deprived zombie. Nicholas ran over to see them every chance he got between school and his shifts at the train station, where he sold tickets and announced arrivals and departures. He brought Emmeline the last few assignments she needed to do before school was over. Nicholas watched Millie as Emmeline took her final exams. Emmeline was pretty sure she passed, which felt like a huge win considering everything happening.

On top of that, her body was healing from the delivery, and her muscles still felt sore and uncomfortable. She was amazed at how different her body looked now that she had given birth compared to before she had been pregnant. Nicholas couldn't help but comment on how much more curvier her hips were and salivated at the two round melons that stood up at attention on her chest.

"Of course, he'd say that," said Ginny, sitting crossed-legged on the floor, playing with Millie in her bouncy chair. Nicholas was working most of the day but did a flyby visit to snuggle with Millie on his lunch. He had been friskier than normal, whispering some words into Emmeline's ear that made her blush.

"I know, but he didn't have to be so graphic about it." Emmeline was still embarrassed.

"Meh, he loves you. I'm sure if you came out of pregnancy flat-chested, he'd love that too." Ginny smiled at Millie. "Your mommy's a pretty girl, just like you!"

Ginny pulled down one of the tiaras and a feather boa and dressed Millie up. Drool hung out of her mouth, and she tried to put the feathers from the boa into her mouth. Emmeline absentmindedly pulled the boa off, her mind wandering to bigger issues. Millie protested, but Ginny started kissing her belly, and Millie forgot about the hot pink feathers. Emmeline smiled, seeing her best friend and baby playing on the nursery floor.

"The big problem isn't finding some alone time with Nicholas, but the fact that I'm powerless," Emmeline said, scrunching up her face. "And powerless is the last thing I can be right now."

"Back to this. You just gave birth two weeks ago. You need to give yourself time."

"Time to do what? I have no idea what I'm supposed to be or what to do. I can't work now—Millie eats about every ten minutes, and I don't even know how I'm supposed to return to school in the fall. I am reliant on everyone for everything. What kind of example is that?" This thought ran through her head a hundred times a day as her new reality settled in. "I felt like I didn't even have the option to tell my mom I hated the nursery. She didn't even ask me what color I'd like it. I had planned for Millie to stay in my room with me. I want her close to me at night, not across the hall."

"Emmeline, you're smart. You'll figure it out."

"I wish you could wave a magic wand and give me some direction. I always thought there would be more time. I should have had a  year of high school extra to decide what I wanted to do before having to turn into an adult. Do you think I'd make a good lawyer?"

That was Ginny's dream. "Ha, not unless you learn to stand in front of large groups of people and not get your words all tangled up."

Emmeline laughed. "Can you imagine? 'Your honor, my client pleads guilty—I mean not guilty! Really, sir, he didn't do it. Please believe me!' "

"You'd both end up in jail!"

"Probably."

Ginny glanced down at her watch. "I gotta go, but you'll figure this out. We can talk about it more later."

Emmeline puffed out her cheeks, then blew out slowly and said goodbye. She wished Ginny could stay longer but understood that her life was very different from Emmeline's now. At least when Ginny was around, her mother left her alone and temporarily stopped the how-tos, the "why don't you just give the baby to me"s, and the "I'll do it"s. She had even harassed Emmeline for deciding to breastfeed and chastised her on the inappropriateness of Callum calling every evening to make sure they were okay. What was the problem? They had been friends for as long as she could remember.

"If you would just bottle feed the baby, then I could do it for you," Amy said again the following afternoon.

"Mom, there's nothing wrong with breastfeeding. Besides, formula costs too much."

Her mom always threw money at problems, money that she didn't always have. She kept buying Millie all this paraphernalia she didn't need, making Emmeline feel guiltier because she couldn't do it herself. A three-hundred-dollar swing that Millie hated was a necessity. It was all too much, and the worst part was Emmeline had to pee!

She was sitting on the couch in the living room, where she had just nursed Millie to sleep. She looked down at her daughter, looking so peaceful, half-drunk from milk, and making a sucking noise as if she was still nursing in her sleep. Maybe, if Emmeline moved ever so slowly, she could put Millie down and have a chance to go to the bathroom in peace.

She leaned back as far as she could, putting an inch between her and her captor, and then started to wiggle her left butt cheek over. Millie moved. Emmeline froze.

Must go slower, she thought.

"What on earth are you doing?" Amy looked at Emmeline like she was the most ridiculous person on earth. Emmeline rolled her eyes. Despite the house being immaculate, Amy was wearing her bright yellow cleaning gloves and while scrubbing every surface of the house for the baby shower she had planned for that day. It didn't seem to matter that Emmeline didn't want the baby shower; she just wanted a nap. Besides, none of Emmeline's friends were coming, only her mother's, and Emmeline had no interest in spending the afternoon playing "My life is perfect" with them.

"Shhhh," Emmeline hissed .

"Just put the baby down," Amy said, exasperated.

"If I just put the baby down, she'll wake up, and I'll have to start all over again." Emmeline, clenched her teeth.

"For God's sake, you will spoil that baby. Is that what you want? Every time she cries, you come running?"

As if on cue, Millie started to cry, and Emmeline groaned. She picked Millie up and stormed out of the living room, down the hall to the bathroom. It wouldn't be the first time she went pee carrying the infant, and she had a feeling it wouldn't be the last. Thank God for stretchy pants that she could pull down with one hand!

By three o'clock, the house was in a state Mr. Clean would be envious of, and Amy wore a slimming black dress that flared in the skirt, with a simple pair of Mikimoto pearls draped around her neck. She had bought them on a boat tour to Japan, and they were her pride, bringing them out only for special occasions. She wore a pair of yellow heels, looking perfect and completely put-together.

Emmeline was still in her yoga pants and a t-shirt with baby drool decorating the shoulder when the doorbell rang. A throng of ladies, all bearing gifts with pristine pink bows, came barging through the door. Amy showed them to the living room, where music was playing, and there was a table full of church lady sweets. A two-tiered cake was the centerpiece, and they oohed and awed at it.

With people in the house, Emmeline decided she better dress for company. One step into her room, a yawn overtook her face; her bed was extremely tempting. She could imagine crawling in and falling asleep. Instead, she picked up Millie and changed her into the bundle of pale ivory lace and frills that her mother considered a dress, then found a clean floral maternity dress and put it on. Not exactly the height of fashion, but most of her old clothes still didn't fit, and those that did just made her feel fat.

She plastered on a fake smile and threw her hair up in a ponytail, ignoring the makeup on her vanity that once belonged to her great-grandmother. In her previous life, she would have spent hours putting it on before a party, now it lay ignored as she started down the stairs. She would have to do just the way she was.

Just the way she was—she liked that idea. She felt a bolt of steel build up in her spine. If she was going to make it or be the person her daughter needed her to be, she had to believe that she was enough. Not just say it, believe it. No one else could teach her daughter that in any meaningful way. It was her job. Millie was her daughter, not her mother's or anyone else's.

She returned up the stairs and pulled out a rainbow-striped sleeper from the closet. Emmeline loved it, and it fit Millie just right. She had bought it downtown before she even got up the courage to tell her parents she was pregnant. She undressed Millie and put the new outfit on. She looked adorable, and better than that, she looked like her daughter. Emmeline was filled with resolve.

"Well, kid. What do you think?" She rubbed her baby's belly. Millie gurgled and spit up. Emmeline wiped her face and snuggled her closely, smelling her soft baby skin. Would anything ever smell as good as her daughter?

"You ready? Well, me neither, but it's you and me, kid. And it's about time we figured this thing out." Emmeline glanced over at her vanity, and with one arm holding Millie, she picked out a shade of pink that always made her smile and tinted her lips. She yawned, then steadied herself. "There's no time like the present."