It was just my luck that I decided to get on the smelliest taxi in all of France. Ever smelled cat pee?

No?

Well, I recommend this taxi for your learning experience.

Thankfully, the driver spoke some English and was helping me find Joshua. I had sprinted straight out of the hotel doors when Johnny had informed me that Joshua wanted to play hooky.  I hadn't even bothered to ask for Johnny's help, because I knew the butthole would only laugh at me or even worse: decide to come with me.

We had been driving around in circles for the past twenty minutes and I was getting more impatient and frustrated with every passing minute.

"Take a right here? Er, how about a left?" I continued to point out several more scattered directions.

Finally, I spotted a string of people with large cameras, all huddling close to a building's entrance.

Aha! Paparazzi.

Sprinting out of the cab, we only had half an hour left, I paid the taxi driver and said goodbye.

I read the sign that had been painted towards the top of the brick building.

Davy's

Huffing, I pushed my way through the large crowd of photographers. I even elbowed a few for fun. My entrance was blocked by a hand on my forehead before I had even gotten the chance to pull one of the large wooden doors open.  The hand belonged to a gigantic ogre of a guy.

 Jesus, just my luck to have to get past that.

I put on my best poker face and sternly spoke, "Excuse me, uh, sir. First of all, do you speak English?"

I got nothing but a cold stare. The guy didn't even remove his meaty hand from my forehead. Talk about a disrespect of personal space.

The idea came to me in a flash, and I whipped out my phone because of it. It took me a couple of seconds to download the translate app, but I finally got what I wanted to say.

" Vous cherchez Joshua?" I asked in butchered French.

"Joshua is friend. You cannot see him. You bad paparazzi"

So the ogre spoke English!

Damn, it didn't look like he was inclined to give me what I wanted. I was determined to get Joshua to that shoot. Obstacles be damned.

"You see, I'm not a paparazzi! How dare you insult me by lumping me with those scumbags?" The paparazzo's uproar behind me helped my case pretty well.

Too bad the ogre wasn't buying it at all. So I did what any stressed out manager could do.

I yelled spider at the top of my lungs.

I was impressed with myself when the Ogre jumped up in surprised hurry.

A guy like that had to be a wuss about something as measly as a spider, I thought cynically.

I took that as my chance and scurried inside of the building. I could hear the ogre's large steps trailing behind me. His voice carried throughout the entire place, but I kept on running. Almost colliding with a large brunette who was carrying drinks, I turned a sharp corner.

I realized this was a bar at the same moment that I caught sight of Joshua. Seeing as a crowd of women were drinking shots off of his chest.

What. A. Man. Slut.

"Hey, popstar!" Joshua yelled to me over the crowd of people.

Popstar? Oh right. I had almost forgotten about my 'Rock Your Body' rendition from earlier.

I decided to go with it for now. The asshole would never see it coming that way.

"Hey! Mind coming over here so that I can tell you something?" The smile on my face got wider, making my cheeks sore. It was all for show anyway.

I was sort of surprised when he obliged after letting one last chick take her drink. What if he was drunk? Could he work like that? Damn, I wish I knew if this was a common occurrence or not.

With a smile he made his way to me and casually leaned against the bar.

"What up?" He asked in a calm and relaxed voice.

His ignorance almost made me break my facade, but not fully.

"Not much. How about you? Having fun?" I was sure that he could tell I was faking it by now. He was enjoying the show none the less.

"Yup, having a blast here." He grinned widely.

"I'm sure you are." My voice dropped down to a deeper level. His casualty was beginning to really piss me off.

"You! Stop lying paparazzi!" The ogre yelled. He stomped his way over to us and nearly grabbed me in a headlock. He would have broken my neck if Joshua hadn't stepped up in front of me.

"Woah, Bob my friend, chill. This here is a friend." He claimed giving me a stare.

Bob did not look convinced, but retreated anyway.

"Why don't you continue to guard the door while I have a talk with her?"

Bob the ogre apparently reverenced the ground Joshua stepped on. Disgusting really. Therefore, with those last words and a huff, he left.

I should have specified that by no way were we friends, but he did stop my neck from being cracked in two.

"How do you even know that guy?" The question was really bugging me.

"I get a lot of work here, so I made a few friends. Don't worry though you're still my best friend." He finished talking and winked.

I could play this game too.

"Well, since I'm your best friend...Can I tell you a secret?" I don't even know where that flirty voice came from. I guess that my acting skills were really improving.

Even the look on his face changed after hearing my voice. I leaned in and enjoyed how close I was getting. I broke his trance when he leaned in and I grabbed hold of his ear.

"We need to go now." I told him in my regular voice, while I continued to tug him by the ear.

You can imagine that the cameras loved seeing Joshua being pulled by the ear by some random girl. The flashes nearly blinded me as I made my way around Bob, who stood guarding the door intently.

I heard Joshua's protest through the clicks of the camera. So I finally let go of his ear and broke into a run when I realized that the entire crowd of paparazzi had the intention of following us.

Just great.

I pulled Joshua's arm while I wound my way through the narrow streets. He was too distracted with his ear pain to take notice of what was happening. Once again, I needed to get something done with no help from anyone.

Thankfully, I saw a city bus from the corner of my eye. Without a second thought, I sprinted towards the thing, pulling Joshua behind me.

I let out a gush of air, because I was so relieved that I was far away from the annoying fuckers that had been trailing us.

It was the first time that I realized famous people had it tough. At least in one aspect of their lives. 

"You run funny," Joshua said from beside me.

Thanks?

"What? I do not!" Now my running was being criticized?

With a small laugh, Joshua continued, "Actually you do. It's funny, because you fling your arms around and your legs wobble. It's pretty weird, too." He continued to chuckle at my expense.

I decided to ignore him from then on. My running was fine...right?

I didn't have the opportunity to question my athletic ability for too long, because the person sitting in front of us had turned around to gawk.

He looked like a homeless bum at first glance. The blond shaggy hair and beard give that impression. I rolled my eyes when I thought that he was staring at Joshua.

"Yeah, yeah, I know he's a male model. Joshua Lachowski in the flesh. Get over it." I mumbled all of this under my breath, while looking down.

Instead, Joshua had to elbow me, because the bum's eyes were not fixed on him, but at me.

His mouth twisted making him look like he had just sucked on a lemon.

"You're next." He whispered.

"I'm what?" I was beyond confused.

The bum casually turned away and continued to ignore me. The next stop came up after a minute and he simply walked out.

What the fuck?!

My hands felt pretty clammy and my face hot. That had been the creepiest experience ever.

I felt something vibrating beside me and investigated where it was coming from.

It was Joshua shaking with laughter. Even when he was all red in the face with a fit of hysterics he still looked great. God, I hated attractive people.

I searched the address for the shoot; all the while Joshua had his fun.

"Your face, when he talked to you!" He kept repeating in between laughs.

HA-HA.