Chapter Ten (Lucas' POV)

"Ethan?" I asked hesitantly. Ethan shifted a little, tightening his arm around me and resting his cheek on my head. He looked uncomfortable, but judging by the fact that he didn't answer, I guessed he was asleep. Was he dreaming about me? Was he telling the truth? Did Ethan love me or was he just having a perverted dream?

"Ethan." I said, giving him a little shake and pulling away from him. He grimaced faintly and his eyes slid open tiredly as he grasped at my arm gently.

"Uh? What? You okay?" He asked sleepily. I studied him as he shifted, yawning and stretching his long legs under Nick's seat before he settled back down, tilting his head back to watch me.

"Yea." I answered shortly. I didn't know whether I should tell Ethan what he said in his sleep or not. He obviously didn't know and wasn't saying anything about what he dreamt of. He looked ready to fall back to sleep until Oliver and Nick got back in the car, handing us each a hot cup of coffee.

"Delicious." Ethan moaned as he gulped it down. I saw his eyes water from how hot it was, but that didn't stop him from chugging half the foam cup. I arched a brow at him and he just grinned at me before he settled the cup in one of the cup holders in back. I set mine beside his and snuggled up against him again.

"I didn't know you talked in your sleep." I said quietly enough so Nick or Oliver couldn't hear me over their own conversation. Ethan blinked and stared at me.

"I do?" He asked obliviously. I nodded slowly. Ethan scrunched up his nose thoughtfully as if he were trying to remember what his dream consisted of before he wrapped his arms around me, squeezing his eyes shut.

"Uh, you think it'd be too much to ask if I could stay over tonight?" He asked quietly. I heard Oliver and Nick hush from the front. I frowned and glanced up to see Ethan's face. He looked like he was in pain or something, making a spark of worry ignite somewhere inside me. I nodded slowly and Ethan sighed with relief, his hot breath blowing against my face.

I relaxed as he seemed to drift off to sleep again. I could already see the lights of Ravenwood coming up and that's when Oliver decided to bug me, again.

"My dad's going to rip his sac off, Lucas. I don't think that was a good idea. Just let him go home. His parents will probably wonder where he is anyway." He said, sounding irritating. I frowned and just shook my head, careful not to disturb Ethan, who was breathing gently, the feel of his chest rising and falling making my back warm.

"That wasn't a suggestion." Oliver deadpanned. I shrugged, closing my eyes in dismissal, but Oliver wasn't going to have it. He snorted.

"Lucas, seriously, do you want to get in trouble? What would your parents say about this? I know Blake would be weary to have Ethan sleeping over. And where would he sleep? Definitely not your room and in case you've forgotten, you and your parents are using our only guest rooms." He warned me. I felt a twinge of irritation surge through me.

Again, I said nothing.

"Come on, Oliver," Nick said suddenly, "Don't do that. Ethan... Ethan can't stay home."

"Why not?"

"His parents are never home."

"Even better."

"Not even better. Ethan doesn't like being alone. It freaks him out."

"Tell him to buy a cat."

"Oliver."

"Look, I don't hate Ethan... much. I just don't want Lucas getting in trouble. My dad can be really nasty sometimes when he's trying to protect us. Lucas may not be his kid, but he's his nephew and my dad takes family seriously." Oliver explained, referring to Rick.

I didn't hate Rick. I just thought he went way overboard with protecting his family. He was possessive of everyone, even Blake and Danny, which they hardly noticed at all seeing as he could be jerks to them too. At the same time, I didn't want Rick giving Ethan grief. Ethan didn't deserve to be harped on just because he liked- uh, loved me.

Besides, it's not like we'd do it...

I wasn't ready for that... I think.

"Why can't Ethan hang out with his other friends?" Oliver offered.

"He doesn't have other friends."

"He doesn't?"

"No. People talk about him all the time and he knows it. Oliver, come on. It's not a bad thing that Ethan hangs out with Lucas. They like each other, right?" Nick looked at me in the rearview mirror and I raised an eyebrow at him, gesturing to the fact that Ethan was holding me while he slept.

"Point taken." Nick agreed. Oliver still looked skeptical as we pulled up into the driveway of our house. Only the kitchen light and living room light were on, making it otherwise dark.

"I don't know." Oliver said at last, then opened the car and got out. I frowned and Nick just looked at me helplessly before climbing out. I shifted, giving Ethan a little shake and watching him shift and whine.

"Why? Just five minutes..."

"You can have five hours if you get out of the car." I told him. Ethan's eyes finally slid open and he smiled faintly when he saw me. I just returned it and we got out of the car together, heading up to the house. Thank goodness no one was in the living room or foyer to greet us.

Oliver and Nick immediately went to Oliver's room. I watched them go with a frown.

How come Oliver could easily have Nick over and I couldn't have Ethan over? Everyone knew Oliver and Nick had sex. It was obvious because Oliver made so much noise. So what was so wrong with me having Ethan over? He wasn't going to hurt me or anything. We both knew sex was out of the question, for now anyway.

"Where is everyone?" Ethan asked, holding my hand as we stood in the foyer. He yawned as I glanced at him, then looked up to see Blake coming down the stairs in a pair of pajama pants, his torso completely bare. His hair was a mess and he looked exhausted.

"It's almost one in the morning. Where were you guys?" He asked me tiredly, but seemed to wake up immediately when he saw me standing with Ethan. I looked at Ethan, who shrugged.

"We stopped for gas on the way here. Sorry we're late." He replied. Blake still didn't look convinced, or pleased that Ethan was here at one in the morning.

"So... Did you need a ride home or-"

"He's staying over." I stated. Blake blinked, then stared at me for a long time without saying anything.

"Okay," He said slowly, "Uh, then Ethan, you can go ahead and get comfortable upstairs... Lucas, I need to talk to you." Ethan and I shared looks and he was reluctant to let go of my hand. He finally did and brushed past Blake up the stairs. As soon as we heard my bedroom shut, Blake turned to me.

"You didn't ask if he could stay over." He deadpanned. I cocked my head, then shrugged as a response.

"Is that his jacket?" Blake asked. I blinked, then patted at the jacket I forgot I had been wearing. Okay, maybe this looked worse than it was. I frowned and dropped my hands to my sides.

"Lucas, I'm glad you found someone to spend your time with, someone you can trust. I trust your judgement. You're a lot more mature than a lot of kids your age, but you're still a kid. I don't want you to mistake the feelings you have toward Ethan. I also don't want him to take advantage of that. He's older than you and he's tempermental. Those odds are against you."

What was he trying to say? Ethan wouldn't hurt me. If anything, he'd slaughter anyone who hurt me, so why was he doubting me? He just said he wasn't doubting my judgement, so why was he contradicting himself? I don't understand.

And what did he mean mistake my feelings toward Ethan? I knew for a fact that I liked Ethan, maybe a little more than I should, but that didn't mean we were going to do anything. We had already tried once before and it obviously failed because I'm an insecure little brat.

"Look," Blake sighed, "I'm not Rick. I'm not going to chew you out for inviting him over without permission, this time anyway. I just want you to be careful, and maybe leave the door open just a little bit or something so I can at least have some kind of security blanket."

What was I? Thirteen? Instead of saying anything, I just stared at him blankly before nodding slowly. I wasn't about to start an argument with him, especially since he was just worrying over me. It could be worse...

It could be Rick lecturing me.

Blake sighed with relief, then smiled tiredly at me.

"I probably don't say it often, but I love you, Lucas. You're my son. I knew the moment I saw you." He said quietly, then retreated up the stairs. I waited until I heard the sound of his bedroom door shut before I drifted up the stairs, feeling dazed.

It felt strange to have someone say that to me.

No one had ever said that to me, not even my biological father. None of the foster parents I had reminded me that they loved me. They had always looked at me with pity or frustration. I wasn't like their children. I wasn't talkative, loveable, athletic, smart, or attractive. It made me wonder why Ethan liked me so much- or loved me, if he was serious when he said that or not.

But for some reason, when Blake had told me that he loved me, I felt... special. Sure, I felt amazing when Ethan told me, but it was a different type of amazing when Blake said it to me. I had always assumed that I was the adopted child. The add-on. Not their child.

I opened the door to my bedroom, still feeling lightheaded from Blake's words when I saw Ethan lying sprawled on my bed. I felt my chest tighten, my hands spread flat out against my sides as I watched him.

He hadn't pulled the blankets up. He was probably too exhausted to care, he hadn't even taken his shoes off. He was just lying there, and yet, he somehow managed to look like an Abercrombie and Fitch model. He had an arm tucked under his head, the other resting over his stomach while his long legs stretched out.

I slowly slid his jacket off, dropping it on a chair and moving to the dresser to change. I paused, though, glancing back at Ethan. It's not that I didn't trust him to wake up and watch me dress, but it was the fact that I didn't trust myself.

I inched back toward the bed, changing my mind instead before I crawled onto the bed beside Ethan. He hummed in his sleep, rolling over on his side and holding his hand out to me. His eyes were still closed, but he obviously wasn't deep asleep.

"Come 'ere." He murmured. I glanced toward the door, which I had left open just a small crack before I flopped down on the bed beside Ethan, who draped his arm around my waist, pulling me against his chest. He shifted his other arm over his head so his fingers were brushing my hair.

"Did I get you in trouble?" He asked, his eyes still closed. I glanced up at his face, studying the planes for a moment. Part of me wanted to kiss his cheek again, but at the same time, I suddenly felt ashamed. I shouldn't betray Blake's trust by doing anything. And it'd be my fault because something in my head told me I'd provoke Ethan again, just like I did last time with the whole kissing business. Instead, I just curled closer to him, my face pressed against his shoulder as I gave my head a quick shake.

"Cool... Mm, you know what? We should spend the rest of the day together..."

"Oh?"

"Yup. Shopping. But, not in like a gay way. We're just gonna hang out."

"Uh huh." I responded. Ethan gave up on trying to make me talk more and just settled for holding me against him. After a few minutes, I relaxed as I heard Ethan breathing steadily, meaning he was fast asleep. I closed my eyes, leaning against him and listening to his breath on my head, his heart beating gently in his chest.

It was the most incredible feeling in the world; to know that you are loved as much as you love. To feel the arms of protection around you, the breath of adoration, the beating of a heart that will eternally beat with your own. Twas beauty personified...

I had to be a total loser to have that paragraph of the romance novel I was reading stuck in my head, especially having it resurface now of all times. However, what the character described was exactly how I was feeling right at this moment. I felt relaxed, protected, complete.

Is this how Oliver felt with Nick?

Is this how Ethan felt about me?

That was my last question before I drifted off to sleep, and thank goodness, it was a deep, blank sleep without a single dream or nightmare. I liked that, because it was deep and silent. Peaceful.

I felt like I had slept a whole day by the time I woke up in the morning. I was warm and comfortable with Ethan still holding on me. I had rolled over to face the door, his arm around my waist and his head resting against mine.

Once upon a time, I'd of had a heart attack.

Now, I didn't want him anywhere else, but here.

The sunlight glowed on the bed from the window and the smell of biscuits and gravy wavered thickly through the air, making me shiver as my stomach knotted up with hunger. I shifted a little, first trying to wake Ethan up. He grunted.

"Stop movin'..."

"Hungry." I stated. Ethan mumbled something inaudible and stopped moving again, signalling that he'd gone back to sleep. I rolled my eyes and just laid there for a while longer, listening to him breath against my ear.

I was waiting for him to talk in his sleep again. I had fallen asleep far too quickly last night so I didn't have enough time to see if he was truly talking in his sleep last night in the car, or if he was awake and just pretending to be asleep.

Maybe I should ask him?

"Lucas! Ethan! Breakfast!" It was Danny's voice and this time as I wriggled away from Ethan, he started grasping after me, his eyes fluttering open.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where're you going?" Ethan asked me sleepily, rubbing at his eyes quickly as he sat up, watching me slide off the bed. I pointed toward the door.

"Breakfast." I responded. Ethan paused, studying me for a moment, then yawned widely and dragged himself out of bed. He looked like he was going to faint or something before he caught his balance, coming up to me.

"I can smell it," He murmured, "Smells good."

"Uh huh."

"What happened to the full sentences? I gotta do hard labor for those?" Ethan asked me with a scowl, brushing past me to the hallway. I followed him immediately as we went down the stairs to the kitchen. I just shrugged and Ethan rolled his eyes. We walked into the kitchen, and I immediately regretted it.

Danny wasn't the only one sitting at the table. Rick decided to take it upon himself to join us this morning while Devin was cooking.

"He stayed the night." Rick deadpanned.

"Surprise." Ethan responded sarcastically. Rick glared at him and Danny coughed awkwardly before gesturing for us to join his side of the table. We obeyed and I sat between him and Ethan, who yawned.

"So, you guys went to dinner last night at that fancy Italian place in Jensen. How'd that go?" Rick asked casually. He was getting at something. What? I had no clue.

"Nice place, good eats, nasty waitress." Ethan replied. Rick frowned.

"Nasty waitress?"

"The bitch was giving Nick the look all the time. Best part was Nick didn't even notice her. I think her name was like Emily Foxx or something like that." Ethan explained. Rick stared at him as if he'd grown another head. Danny choked on his coffee. Devin yelped, apparently burning himself on something.

"Ow!"

"Damn it." Rick got up and was by Devin's side immediately, taking Devin's hand and holding it under cold water. Ethan raised an eyebrow, glancing at me. I gave him a blank stare. I had no idea what they were freaking out about. I didn't see anything wrong with what he said- Unless swearing was suddenly taboo in our house. In which case, we'd all be in trouble.

"Did I say something wrong?" Ethan asked at last.

"No," Danny managed, running a hand through his hair, "I just... Uh, we know that person. Jeez, I never thought she'd be a cougar."

"I did." Devin deadpanned. Danny glared at him and Devin just batted his lashes innocently, then gasped when Rick sucked in the finger he burnt. I watched Rick give Devin a seductive grin, his tongue licking the tip of Devin's finger.

"Just making extra sure you're okay." He replied daintily, lapping at Devin's finger one more time before Devin tore his finger away, giving Rick a blushing glare before he wiped his finger on his shirt.

"Uh, anyway, whatever. So long as Nick focused on Oliver. Emily's a deadbeat whore. I'm surprised she's still alive and not lying in a ditch somewhere." He retorted, folding his arms over his chest. Ethan and I shared quick looks before looking back at the adults, who just nodded in agreement.

"Did you stop by my parents house to grab those things I asked for?" Danny asked as he regained his composure, taking a gulp of coffee and offering me a drink. I hesitantly took it, avoiding his fingers on the mug before I took a deep gulp, sighing at the warmth the coffee gave me.

"Yea, Nick's got the stuff in the car... So, which one of you is related to Mr. Carter? I mean, Ace. Whatever you want me to call him." Ethan drawled.

"We are," Devin replied cheerily, "He's our dad. Uh, Vic's his boyfriend. Er, husband. Should be husband. Fucking arrogant bigots made it illegal for gay marriage. Anyway, what's your point?"

"Just wondering." Ethan answered.

"He didn't chew you out, did he?" Devin asked, looking sick. Ethan shrugged.

"Not as bad as your hubby could." He replied. Rick glared at him, then suddenly looked disgusted.

"Ew. Your dad and I actually agree on something. Fuck this, I'm going to the doctors today. I think I might have caught his stupid." He groaned, dramatically placing a hand on his forehead. Devin scowled, elbowing him in the ribs and making Rick smirk at him.

"Cut it out. My dad just worries like you do. Only, apparently you're worse than my dad."

"Now I think I need surgery."

"Rick."

"Or chemo. Or a transplant. Or maybe you should just back up over me with the Harley."

"It's tempting."

"Continue your couple fight in the garage," Danny snorted, waving his hand at them dismissively, "I want a nice breakfast that doesn't involve Rick's annoying voice."

"Says you, pretty boy. I'm not the one who swears like a sailor."

"Fuck you."

"Point proven."

"Devin!" Danny cried in exasperation. Devin held his hands up in surrender, then dropped them on Rick's shoulder, leaning into his ear to whisper something. Rick scowled for a split second before his expression relaxed and he cocked his head as if considering whatever Devin was telling him before he nodded. He started to leave, then stopped to give Devin a deep, passionate kiss that literally almost knocked him over before he left the room.

Devin glared after him, his face red before he whirled to face Danny, Ethan, and I.

"What the hell are you three looking at?" He demanded. Danny looked away innocently and Ethan coughed awkwardly. I just cocked my head before looking at Ethan, giving his sleeve a tug. He gave me a questioning look. I tilted my head.

"Mall?" I asked. Ethan blinked.

"Oh yea. Uh, is it okay if I kidnap Lucas for the day? I mean, not like for anything evil, just wanted to head to the mall." He said. Devin frowned and looked at Danny, who immediately brightened.

"Of course! That'd be great, I can give you guys a ride since I need to stop by there and grab some health crap for Blake anyway. Let's hurry up and eat breakfast so we can head out." He agreed, looking excited. He was probably glad that I had a friend.

Oh wait. According to Ethan, we were dating.

I'd have to remember that.

We're boyfriends, not friends. Boyfriends.

This whole thing was Greek to me.

"Good, I'm starving. I could've eaten twelve of those Calzones last night if they weren't ten bucks each." Ethan muttered as Devin set out the plates, casting us a curious look. Danny rolled his eyes.

"I know. I hate expensive places like that. Cool and all, but wastes your cash. I prefer a good ol' McDouble." He declared.

"You read my mind, sir." Ethan responded with a grin.

"Your rather waste your health, not your money? You two are peas in a pod." Devin snorted as he used tongs to place the biscuits on the plates. I felt my stomach tremble at the sight of the gravy pouring over top of them.

"Who said a McDouble was unhealthy?" Danny asked incredulously.

"Everyone with an IQ above 8." Devin returned flatly. Danny scowled and used his fork to stab at his biscuits. Devin rolled his eyes and took a seat with us after setting all the plates before he leaned back in his seat.

"BREAKFAST! Come get it now or you won't get it at all!" He hollered. Ethan glanced at me and I just shook my head. Eventually, Rick came back, sauntering into the dining room and taking a seat beside Devin, showering him with praise over the food.

Devin looked pleased and just cocked his shoulders sassily before flashing Rick a grin, one that earned a kiss on his nose.

"We're eating." Danny snorted.

"Shut up, Mr. I-Moan-All-Night-Long-And-Keep-The-Whole-House-Up." Rick drawled casually, ignoring Danny's reddening face and his scowl.

"Quit teasing him, Rick." Blake said as he came into the dining room, giving me a smile. He sat down beside Danny, whispering something in his ear before he settled in his seat. Danny scrunched up his nose, but said nothing in response. Eventually, Oliver, Nick, Molly, and Anya came down the stairs and took their places at the table.

"Wow, my parents actually let you stay the night!" Molly exclaimed to Ethan, who flashed her a cocky grin. Rick snorted.

"Sure. Because I always let jail bait into my house."

"Shut up, Rick." Devin commanded.

"No offense taken." Ethan assured him, locking eyes with Rick, who glared at him. I frowned. I really wished Rick wasn't so hostile toward everyone who came toward his kids, or me. Of course, I really appreciated the fact that he worried about me, even if I wasn't his kid. I was grateful for that, but he shouldn't stick his nose in my affairs all the time. I knew what Ethan was like, and he saved my life at the Halloween dance on Friday, but obviously everyone was conveniently forgetting that.

"Ignore him," Anya said, surprising me, as she hardly spoke around me and I knew she didn't like me by the way she stuck her nose in the air around me, "My dad has a big head, and if Lucas likes you, I like you. Just so long as you don't, ya know, burn our house down. I'm totally fine with you."

Maybe she didn't hate me as much as I thought she did.

"I'd ground you if I thought it would actually do something." Rick deadpanned.

"You could try taking my dignity away, but I bet you ten bucks I'll take yours first." Anya responded.

"This is why you don't have a girlfriend."

"This is why you only have the motorcycle."

"At least the motorcycle does what I tell it to."

"Excuse me?" Devin demanded. Rick averted his eyes, picking up his bottle of beer, taking a long swig and avoiding Devin's eyes. Anya smirked and went on eating, looking rather victorious as she did so.

"You have an interesting family." Ethan whispered to me while Devin poked and proded Rick mentally and physically about what exactly he meant to say. I glanced at him for a moment, then scanned the table. My eyes moved from Devin all the way around to Blake. I guess now that I thought of it, they were my family.

The only family that kept me and tried to talk to me.

That made me want to smile, but I suppressed it and sat back in my seat, nibbling on a plain biscuit I grabbed from the basket at the center of the table.

"Well, I'm excusing myself," Anya declared, "I have lots of work to do. People to annoy, zombies to kill, men to harass."

"Speaking of harassing men, daddy, I need you to take me to Jenny's house. Her three day slumber party starts tonight and I already told her I was going!" Molly exclaimed, scooting back in her seat and looking at Rick innocently. Rick scrunched up his nose in distaste.

"You're as bad as your sister." He commented, then kissed Devin goodbye before gesturing for Molly to follow him. She squealed and raced after him, wrapping her arms around his arm and leading him out of the kitchen, of course, not before I caught the sight of a smile on Rick's face.

He wasn't all bad. He was just thick-headed.

"And I have to head to work." Blake said, getting up. Danny frowned.

"On Sunday?" He asked. Blake gave him an apologetic smile.

"Sorry, but Jacob called in sick and I have to replace him today. I'll be back a little late, so don't wait up."

"Okay." Danny answered, obviously disappointed. Blake looked a little hurt, then leaned down and kissed him, giving him a hug and murmuring something in his ear. Danny shivered and shoved at him.

"Go away, you pervert."

"See you tonight. You too, Lucas. Behave." He said with a smirk to Danny, then looked at me sternly. I just nodded and waved him off. Blake smiled again, then waved a goodbye to everyone else before he departed.

"What about you two?" Devin asked loudly to get Oliver's attention off Nick, who was muttering something under his breath. Oliver glanced up, shrugging a little.

"Dunno. Thinkin' a movie. Robbing a bank. Sex." He answered sarcastically. Nick choked on his food, thumping his fist into his chest until Ethan clapped him on the back and a chunk of biscuit popped out of his mouth.

"Or we might have to take Nick to see a specialist about his eating habits." Oliver tacked on.

"Right," Devin said tightly, "Well, you guys can just come with us to the mall."

"Us?" Danny asked, perplexed. Devin snorted.

"We hardly get to hang out anymore. You're busy with Blake and Lucas half the time. Pay attention to me!"

"Okay," Danny looked eager, "Sounds great! Let's all get ready then. We'll take your truck since it fits more people into it. My car is... Well, never mind. I'll tell you later. Come on." He was already on his feet. Devin smirked, then quickly gathered up the plates to catch up with his brother.

"Fine," Oliver agreed at last, "I need to grab a book anyway." He got up and gave Nick's shoulder a little pull. Nick reluctantly got up and followed him out of the room. I stood up and gestured for Ethan to follow me upstairs.

"Jeez, your uncle can cook. I'd kill for a homemade meal like that every day." He groaned, rubbing his stomach and licking his lips. I cocked my head thoughtfully.

Devin's cooking was good. It looked easy enough to make, right?

I kept that thought in mind as I drifted into my room, holding a hand up to Ethan to keep him in the main part of my room while I went into the bathroom connected to my room. I had grabbed some clothes to change into once I got out and hurried my shower.

I almost tripped on the way out. I don't know why, but I was so excited to spend the day with Ethan. It gave me a chance to find out more about him, and if he really loved me or not.

I hurriedly tore on a pair of black jeans to match the snug sweatshirt. I went to pull the hood up, then stopped as I caught my reflection. I was so used to hiding in my sweatshirts. This was one of the few sweatshirts that I owned that wasn't huge. I tilted my head at myself, dark blue eyes staring back at me. I let my hood drop and went into the bedroom to see Ethan lounging on my bed, holding the Lord of the Flies book.

He looked up, quickly setting the book down and getting up. He shifted from foot to foot awkwardly.

"Uh, ready to go?" He asked. I nodded and went up to him, taking his hand and leading him out of the bedroom. It felt strange. I was so small and Ethan was just huge. I was an insect in every way when compared to him.

We got downstairs and Devin was already waiting, ready to drive us. Oliver and Nick came down just shortly after. We had to wait at least another fifteen minutes for Danny, who finally made his way down.

"Sorry," He panted after running down the stairs as we walked outside, "Just got a call from that employer at Arby's. I think I might've gotten the job- I hope I got the job."

"I thought you already had a job." Devin pointed out. Danny blushed.

"Uhm..." His voice trailed and he so obviously glanced back at me for a split second before looking at Devin, who grimaced and nodding in understanding.

I knew they were struggling with money. They'd spent so much on me, and now that I thought about it, I'd been ungrateful and rude to them. I hadn't meant to in the beginning. I just really didn't want to get attached to someone who was going to leave me, but then they made it clear that they had no intention of giving me up.

And now we were in debt.

Danny, Devin, and Oliver ended up sitting in front with Ethan, Nick, and I in the back. I sat by the window with Ethan at my side, our hands firmly clasped together.

It was nice. I'm glad no one commented on it either. I was sick of people chiding me that I was too young to understand what was going on. It was like Blake said- I was more mature than a lot of other people. I knew the difference between love and lust- Now anyway. I used to think it was all lust, but it couldn't possibly be that when the feelings I had for Ethan were so strong, they almost knocked me over.

"Here's some money," Danny told me after we had parked in the parking lot and were about to go our seperate ways, "Buy whatever you want. You guys be careful and stay in the mall, don't go anywhere else." Danny pressed a couple of twenties into my palm and I looked at him quizzically.

He shouldn't be giving me all this money, especially when it was hard to come by.

He smiled warmly at me, glancing past me quickly to see Ethan and Nick laughing at something together while Oliver rolled his eyes. He looked back at me.

"Ethan's not bad. I know everyone's telling you that you're too young and all that... But I know you, Lucas. You're too smart to make mistakes. Just be careful, okay?" He asked me. I studied his face for a moment, then nodded.

"Okay. Thank you." I answered. Danny's face lit up and he looked so proud and happy to hear me talk to me. I gave him a smile in return before I went over to Ethan, grabbing his hand and urging him silently to go inside with me.

We let Oliver and Nick go somewhere else while the two of us walked inside, a warm blast of heat giving me goose bumps upon entering.

"Ah," Ethan sighed, squeezing my hand comfortably, "I hate fall. It's so cold. I want summer to be here again. Next summer, we should go to the lake near Crawford City. I hear it's practically crystal clear. It'd be nice to see you with hardly any clothes on. Of course, no clothes would be better, but yea."

I cocked a brow at him and he blushed.

"Just thinking out loud. So, uh, hey, look. A distraction." He started to drag me toward a random clothing shop that sat at the corner of the mall, which was conveniently across from the bookstore. I really wanted to go in there instead, but Ethan suddenly looked like he had an idea.

I really hoped he wasn't going to buy me any clothes. I hated it when people bought me stuff. It made me uncomfortable.

We walked inside and just milled around. I let Ethan wander off on his own- Or, well, he did it on his own. I can't stop him, I wasn't in charge of anything. I never was a leader, or a follower. I was a loner, but I guess that made me a natural follower. Or something like that.

I stopped to look at some of the jeans when Ethan approached me, looking so falsely innocent that it made my face twist up. He was holding a bag with a couple of black items of clothing.

"What?" I asked curiously. Ethan shrugged.

"Nothing. Just bought us a few things."

"Us?"

"Yup."

"Ethan."

"Yup. So, wanna head over to Hot Topic? I wanted to grab something from there too."

"Why not Spencers while you're at it?"

"Ugh, no. That store stinks almost as bad as Abercrombie and Fitch. It's like they killed a bunch of cologne bottles... Or models. I prefer the latter. Anyway, come on." Ethan said, gesturing for me to follow before he took my hand. I kept trying to get a peek of what was in the bag, but he was careful to keep it tied up tightly in his fist.

I really hope it wasn't anything perverted or else my parents will kill me. Something told me Ethan wouldn't do that, but he could be very unpredictable.

I liked Hot Topic better, I noticed, comparing it to the other store. This place was far more easier to breath in, for me anyway. Ethan looked a little uncomfortable and he stood out amongst the tween goths that roamed around, snatching screamo band CDs off the shelves. I left Ethan where the candy was while I scanned the t-shirts and my eyes fell on one in particular.

A black t-shirt with zombie looking cupcakes drawn on it with pale blue lettering that read:

Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice.

Is it just me or was the irony that smacked me lately, smacking me harder?

I glanced around, then reached up and took the shirt off the rack, scanning it for the size, which was just a size too small and forty bucks. Fantastic.

Hot Topic may be the most comfortable place for a loner like me, but it's prices were meant for the rich. What sort of plain t-shirt costed forty bucks? The tag read limited edition under the price sticker and I rolled my eyes, about to put it back on the shelf when Ethan snatched it from my grasp.

"Nice shirt. Ironic."

"Huh?"

"Cuz, you know, you're sugar and spice and everything nice. How much you got?"

"It's too small."

"No, it's not."

"Is to."

"Try it on."

"Never."

"Please? Please, pretty please with sugar on top and strawberries and sprinkles and anything else you like on your ice cream that I promise to put on if you try the shirt on?" Ethan sang sarcastically, then grinned when I smirked at him. He hung the shirt back up, studying it for a moment before he went to go check out his candy.

I hesitated, then grabbed the shirt, sneaking off to the dressing room. I didn't want to do this, but at the same time, I felt like I had to. I ducked into a room and locked the door behind me before I stripped off my sweatshirt. I hesitantly pulled the shirt on, having to roll it over my torso.

I grimaced. It wasn't small at all. In fact, it was perfect. I checked the size again. Medium. So how did I fit into a small?

I felt like a girl standing there in a snug t-shirt. I shouldn't walk around in this kind of shirt. People already knew I was gay- because of my cousins, which was totally logical to everyone at school in some unseen and ridiculous way. Then again, who said I had to wear it to school? I could just wear it at home. No one would know.

I could just wear it so I could remember the one thing my mom used to say to me that actually put me in a good mood.

I took the shirt off, throwing my sweatshirt back on and slinking out. I searched for Ethan and saw him sucked into one of the CDs across the shop. I quickly purchased the forty dollar shirt that I was never going to wear in public.

So that's why we're in debt.

I'm not even related to my adoptive parents and I was already showing signs of becoming them.

Fantastic.

I grabbed Ethan's arm on the way out, pulling him along with me and straight to the book store.

"Are you trying to punch my ego into the floor?" Ethan asked in distress as we entered the shop. I rolled my eyes and drifted toward the new arrival shelf. Ethan was right on my tail, avoiding the curious gaze of the shop keeper.

Sure enough, he started to drift over to us.

"Afternoon, Lucas. Did you finish that other book already?"

No, but I didn't tell him that and just nodded. He smiled.

"You're wicked fast, kid. Well, here're all the new arrivals. I think you might like this one. It's popular and I hear it's gonna be made into a movie sometime this year." He pointed out, gesturing to an orange book on the shelf. I lifted it up, studying the title as he went to attend to another customer.

"What's it about?" Ethan asked at last, leaning over my shoulder. I glanced up at him, then down at the book and read the back of it to him in a whisper. Ethan tilted his head, listening before he nodded.

"Sounds neat. Gonna get it?"

"No more money."

"What am I? Chopped liver? I have cash left."

"No. It's fine."

"No, it's not. Maybe I want it to, and the only way I can get a book is if you read it to me. Will you read it to me once we're done with Lord of the Flies?" He asked. I studied him for a moment, then sighed and handed him the book. He grinned and we headed to the register to check out.

We left the shop and Ethan openly held my hand.

Of course, that was probably a bad idea at that point in time because I heard a loud, rude laugh. I recognized it anywhere and Ethan and I both stopped walking. Ethan went rigid and let go of my hand, turning around to see Rico and Mike.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Ethan hissed at them. Rico snorted.

"Being normal. What about you faggots? This is a place for normal people." He mocked.

"I didn't think you were gay, Ethan," Mike admitted with a smirk, folding his arms over his chest, "But hey. I should've guessed by the way you were so desperate to make tackles during a game."

Ethan's cheeks burned and he was tense. I could see a vein throbbing in his jaw as he clenched his teeth together, his fists tight at his sides.

"And wait until Carter gets you. I'd say you're lucky he didn't snitch on you, but he wants to take you out himself. So if I were you, I'd watch yourself. And your little bitch." Rico added, his eyes locking me on. I immediately took a step back, feeling uneasy. Ethan's eyes flamed.

"Fuck you both. Lay one finger on him and I'll rip your heads off and shove them up Carter's ass. Let's see how he recovers from that." He spat.

"Oooh, we're so scared," Mike taunted, "Tsk. Just wait, Niles. You and your bitch are going to get it."

"Call him that one more time and I'll tear you to pieces."

"See you around. Or for your sakes, you better hope not." Rico retorted, then stalked off with Mike on his heels. I watched them go, keeping my distance as they went past toward the exit. I looked back at Ethan once I was sure they weren't coming back. He was still standing frozen, but shaking with anger.

I wanted to say something, but I suddenly felt like if I said anything, it'd get so much worse. I didn't want to talk anymore, I felt too tired.

I waited a couple more minutes before I dared to give Ethan's sleeve a little tug. He snapped out of his stupor to stare at me, then frowned.

"Ignore those assholes, Lucas. They're not gonna touch you." He muttered. I just stared at him until he grabbed my hand and led me outside toward the car.

The whole time my stomach flip-flopped. I really hoped that it was just one of those idle threats. The last thing I needed was Carter coming after me, and getting Ethan into trouble.

If he went to jail again, I don't know what I'd do.