Kissing Nicholas at first was just a simple peck, to see if he would pull away, and to see if it was something I could do.

He didn't pull away, and neither did I. 

He kissed me back but despite how sloppy our kiss was, he never pulled away, and neither did I.
I felt like something magical was happening without even realizing it.

I didn't hate it, his lips felt nice, and Nicholas had let me take the lead completely, even though I could sense just how much he wanted to take over and deepen the kiss.

After a few seconds, I stopped and opened my eyes, and when I saw that Nicholas had too, and was, I couldn't believe what I had just done, and with whom I did it with.

I kissed the Crown Prince of England.

Oh my god, I must have lost my damn mind, what was I thinking, kissing him?

"Sorry-" I pulled back and stood up from the sofa. "I shouldn't have done that."

I was now fully in panic mode with what I had just done, never done anything like that before, but what scared me the most was how much I didn't want to stop kissing him.

I even wanted to do it again, but this was insane.

"I need to leave." I said out loud, going to walk past him to get to the elevator.

"Wait-" Nicholas stood up and reached out and grabbed my hand, stopping me.

"What's wrong?" He asked, worried filling his eyes. "Did I do something wrong? If I do, please tell me, don't just go." 

I moved my head away and gazed away from him, afraid if I looked at him anymore today I might cry in front of him, for unknown reasons.

I felt weird, like suddenly I had a billion eyes on me, judging me, it was a scary feeling that made me feel like I had done something wrong, simply for liking it.

"I just need to go." I said, not recognising my own voice. "P-Please let go of me."

I couldn't look at him, I had no idea what face he was making now, even though his hand tightened around mine, I knew that he wanted me to tell him why I was behaving like this, but I just couldn't.

This was all happening too fast.

Nicholas let go of my hand, and I immediately walked over to the elevator and pressed the button multiple times, afraid to turn around and look him in the eye.

"It's natural to be scared, Charlie." Nicholas said from behind me, as I heard him walk over to me.

"I..." He paused, just as the elevator doors opened.

I quickly get inside and press the button for the lobby, and make the stupid mistake of raising my head, and looking straight at him.

I had seen that look on his face so many times, but not on his, but on my parents' face, it wasn't sadness, but the look of disappointment, disappointment in me.

It broke something inside of me knowing I had made someone I admired, someone I could've felt for feeling this way about me in such a short time.

I felt like his pale blue eyes saw every broken thing inside me at that moment, and for that, I couldn't bear to be near him.

Nicholas never said another word to me as I felt his eyes on me the entire time the doors closed between us, it brought tears to my eyes and an overwhelming sense of shame as the elevator went down.

What the heck am I doing?

*****

It's been a few days since the hotel incident, and things have gone back to normal.

I woke up, went to work, and then did what I always did, prepared for the next day.

Nicholas was a distant memory now, and everything was how it was.

He hadn't contacted me since that day, and I hadn't contacted him, nor has he come by the bakery since, which should make me happy, but all it did was make me miserable.

The day after the hotel, I saw on the news that he was seen with a model who I recognised on a perfume advert in town.

I would be lying if I said I didn't feel anything from hearing that, not after everything he had told me, from basically being in love with me for a year.

I wasn't a guy who usually cried, I learned the hard way that no matter how much you cried, nothing was going to change, but still, as soon as I got home, I stood in the shower and let out all the frustration I felt.

I let myself be swept up in a world that I could never see, and I blame nobody but myself.
I was curious because he was royalty, and flattered because he took an interest in me, but I still embarrassed myself in front of him.

He must think the worst of me, I know he did.

That look on his face said enough, even if he said nothing to me.

The truth was I was scared to be with him, to really be with him, and to be with anyone, it's why I could never keep a girlfriend for any longer than a month.

Eventually, I push people away because I don't want to disappoint anyone because eventually, they will see that there's nothing interesting about me, and then leave me for someone better.

Nicholas proved me right, and nothing hurt more than knowing I was right.

*****

I was finishing up for the day and getting ready to close the shop, my helper, Chloe had left for the day and went home, leaving me alone to close.

It had been so busy today that I didn't even have time to think, but no matter how busy the bakery got, his name was everywhere.

Word had gotten out that Prince Nicholas was seen in my bakery, which only put my bakery on the map and because of that, a lot of people, young, old, men and women came by to ask me questions, to see if it was real.

'Real' I didn't even know the word anymore.

It all felt like such a dream.

I was happy that I finally got myself a week off starting tonight, I was finally going to take time for myself and get out of the city for a few days, to get my head straight.

Just as I was about to pull down the barriers in front of the bakery and lock them, I felt a tap on my shoulder, making me jolt and quickly turn around.

"What the fu-" I used my elbow to shove whoever was behind me, and then I quickly turned around to see who it was.

It was dark, but not dark enough to hide the famous colour of his hair, blonde, perfectly styled, even in the dark, it was hard to not know who it was.

"Woah." He held up his hands and smiled sheepishly underneath the street lamp outside.
"I didn't mean to scare you, I called your name but you didn't answer me."

Did he? Was I that out of it I didn't even hear him call my name, or walk up behind me?

"You... scared the shit out of me." I couldn't help but groan, as I sank to my knees and rubbed my face with my hands.

My heart was beating out of control, and for a second, I really thought I was going to get robbed, or worse, but the end result was much worse.

Why was Nicholas here? And skulking around in the dark no less?

"What the hell are you doing here?" I sigh, and stand up straight, picking the lock up that I dropped from the floor.

I didn't care that he was a prince, I almost knocked him out, which could've caused me bigger problems.

"Shit, I'm sorry, I just didn't know what else to do." He apologized, a guilty look on his face as he lowered his hands.

"I just came to say I understand how you feel now and I won't bother you again, and that I'm sorry for how I acted that day."

"I messed up and I just didn't want you to think I hated you or... something, because I didn't contact you."

What was he talking about, since when was this his fault?

"I left." I swallowed hard, and looked away from him to lock the bakery up. "You didn't have to come all the way here to take the blame."

"If you feel guilty then just don't, I'm sure the next person will be more worth your time."

I knew I shouldn't have said that, but the feelings were still raw, and I hated myself for how petty I sounded when I had nothing to be upset about in the first place.

We kissed, that was all, it wasn't like he was mine to begin with.

"What do you mean by that?" He grabbed my arm and pulled to make me turn and look at him.
He looked annoyed, but no more than how I felt. "I'm just saying, you moved on pretty quick for a guy who confessed to liking me." 

I tugged the lock to see if it was steady, then I moved and walked past him, to get to the back of the bakery to get to my apartment.

"Oh I see, you believe everything you see on the news, is that it?" He followed behind me, as I sped up the pace.

"Charlie-" He jogged to walk beside me. "Just stop will you? Let's be adults and talk about this."
Nicholas walked in front of me and blocked the entrance to the stairs leading up to my apartment, with a fierce look in his eye that told me he wasn't going to move unless I talked to him.

"Get out of my way." I asked, my patience growing thin. 

"Not before you tell me why you won't talk to me about this." He said, not budging.
Was this guy for real? "Don't you have better things to do, than to go after a nobody like me?" I sighed and rubbed my forehead.

Suddenly, Nicholas sneezed and then started to cough, only then did I notice how red his hands, ears and cheeks were like he had been standing in the freezing cold for hours.

"It was an old photo, Charlie, I haven't been with anyone since I saw you almost three weeks ago." He spoke almost desperately, as his breathing grew heavier.

"Please, move." I ask him again, and he simply shakes his head.

"What do you achieve by doing this?" I couldn't believe I was having this conversation right now, with a prince of this country.

"You don't even know anything about me, and I don't even know anything about you, we're just from two different worlds... I..." I pause and look into his now stormy blue eyes.

"It won't work between us, we're too different." I forced out, making my chest clench painfully tight.

As soon as I said what I said, the pain from that day came rushing back to me, and I felt guilty all over again for how much of a coward I was being.

He was trying to get me to see him, to take that leap, but I was pushing him away, and I knew I was doing it.

I was doing it for his own good, and for mine, nothing good will come out of something happening between us.

"I have a dog called Candy, she was a gift from my grandmother before she passed, my hobbies are horse riding and reading, I also like spending time with my nieces whenever I get out of the city, my favourite colour is red, I hate anything sweet, I don't smoke and I stopped drinking after my grandmother died and I want nothing more than to be normal but as it is, I never will be, so my motto is to never regret a single thing- ever, because who knows what the future holds?" He paused to cough and to raise the scarf around his neck higher.

"I'm not perfect, Charlie, but I can tell when someone is afraid to be happy, all I'm asking for is the truth, then I will leave and never come back here, you will never see me again if that's what you want."

Nicholas... 

"Why are you going this far, for someone you don't even know?" I had to ask, defeated and exhausted.

He smiled weakly and then stepped out of the way of the stairs leading up to my apartment.
"That day... when I first entered your bakery, I was ready to give up, but you surprised me." He smiled sadly, his eyes tiredly looking into mine.

"I didn't want to give up just because we're both men, and we come from different worlds, none of that matters to me, I was ready to give you up but then you... you looked at me like a person and not property, and you talked to me like I was anybody else, but... that's not why I like you." 

Nicholas's nose was now red, and it looked as though he would collapse from the cold any minute, but he held himself up by putting his cold, red hand against the side of my building wall, never taking his eyes off mine.

"I fell in love with your smile, your kindness, and because you don't sugarcoat anything with me..."

"You're right, we are strangers, but I don't want to be, and if I'm right, you want to get to know me... too..."

That was all Nicholas could get out, as he stumbled and fell back until his back hit the wall, which made me rush over to him to see if he was alright.

One look at his face, feverish red and he was breathing heavily, was all it took for me to reach out and put his arm behind my neck so I could keep him steady.

I didn't know who to call, looking around it looked like he had come here by himself, and I couldn't risk calling anyone I knew. 

Nicholas wasn't exactly a normal person, and if word got out he was here, people would ask questions.

Questions I had no answers to.

I had no other option... I had to carry him upstairs, just until he felt better.

"You need to get warm." I told him, as his head hung low with a pained expression on his face.

This was going to be fun... "Hang onto me tight, I'll get you warm soon, I promise."