°•》
"my bookmark stayed at the end of a sad story that I wished wasn't mine. But I was meant to live a series... and maybe this next story wasn't as depressing. I held my pen, and decided to write again."
《•°

June

I couldn't focus after seeing that same look on Seokjin's face after all these years. They were busy with the performance, and I managed to make the other stylists handle Jin while I took care of the maknae line. I bent over to press my head against my steering wheel, not ready to drive back home yet.

"God, it's Jin. Jin of BTS. Gosh Jooeun, you aren't the center of the world. Know your place." I mutter to myself and try to breathe. What's better than a degrading talk to get me back to my senses?

As I drive, I realize that him remembering doesn't mean anything. I still have the choice of whether I remember or not. And I choose not to. I seal my plan of continuing to run away from the confrontation we never had and I start to feel more like June again, myself. Jooeun doesn't feel right anymore. I sigh.

》》》

When I arrive and park, I notice another car parked beside Seungho's. And it wasn't Changwook's. I frown and take my phone out to check if there is something I'm supposed to know about, and the texts from my two brothers make everything settle in.

Changwook Oppa❤: I'll be out late today. Don't skip meals and take care of Seungho too.

I nod at his text, not typing a reply, and move onto Seungho's. Frowning at his contact name, I wonder when he managed to change the 'Seungho Oppa❤' that Changwook saved, but I smile at the purple heart when I remember that he knows about V's Borahae.

Cool Oppa😚💜: I'm using the house for a photoshoot, it's a BL show's photoshoot. And it's the second season. So they're pretty cozy. This is your disclaimer/warning whatever you call it before you come in Junnie.
Love you xo

My hands begin to sweat a little against my phone, a BL show? Which one? I put my hand against my mouth to hold in my excitement, I'll possibly meet one of the BL World stars during their photoshoot?

I look back at my phone and text Seungho back.

Who are they?...

I couldn't ask which ones, not that I know, and love them all or anything. Not that this is my guilty pleasure at all. They're not cute. I almost jump when he replies immediately.

Cool Oppa😚💜: Aah. You don't know what BL is? I'm sorry it may sound a bit weird, Boy Love. Like... Boy Love or boyxboy shows?

I continue to play dumb and he tells me not to worry and just come in. Couldn't he just tell me who? I hold back my disappointment and prepare for the worst... or the best in this case, "Hello?" I walk in warily, and my eyes meet...

TharnType. TharnType? I choke and Seungho lets go of his camera and runs towards me, patting my back. "Why are you so shocked, Mew and Gulf will behave don't worry. They can speak a little English, no Korean."

MewGulf are in my house.

"I-I need water." I lie and run to the kitchen to try and collect myself. I peek to make sure I'm not seeing things.

Oh, I'm definitely seeing a lot. I let the wave of intense fangirling takeover and the happiness starts to sit in. I love them! But I got to act normal. Act normal.

I only watched tharntype more times than I can count, no big deal. I fix my hair and drop my bag on the kitchen table. And walk out... to only walk back in.

"Am I ready?... I will never be ready anyway." I nod in admission and walk out.

"Oh, June! We will eat together in a few minutes, we are almost done." Seungho smiles widely at me, seemingly happy with what he has captured. I can only imagine... and the fact that I will have a meal with them sits in soon after.

"O-oh."

》》》

I wake up the next morning in an elevated mood, though BTS have an important performance today and I'll need to be there early to sort out their outfits and accessories, I didn't mind. I'm a very satisfied fan.

I'm living my best life... or close.

Seungho and Changwook are at the table by the time I'm grabbing a granola bar to go, they're looking intensely at each other and are too quiet for it to pass as a normal breakfast. I took my sweet time, trying to listen in if they continue to speak because they just stopped when I came in.

But they don't say anything, did they argue? There are only so little things they can argue about... which one is this?

"Why are you guys not eating?" I turn around and ask, but they continue their staredown contest. It reminds me of the many times they argued, and it was always because of my mom and me.

Everyone hated that. I hated that too. But it wasn't my fault, it wasn't anyone's fault...

Changwook turns to me and smiles, I know that smile he gives when he doesn't want me to worry. And Seungho let's go of the tension that was keeping his shoulders rigid and smiles at me too. "It's nothing."

"You don't need to worry, Junnie." Seungho adds on Changwook, and their smiles weaken into ones of composure.

I hate it when they're like this, and they know it. Because what they have in their eyes right now is something very close to pity, and I don't want that.

I don't want their apologies, all that they did was for me. It was me who asked them to do it. Seungho's constant arguments with my mom, and Changwook's arguments with my dad were because of things I asked them to do for me. And when things went wrong, I waited for them to hate me for it.

But they did not. I was grateful, but they were left hurting. And I was left with the unbearable guilt.

Why couldn't they just get mad at me?
And... why do I get mad at them every time instead?

"Why are you lying to me? Do you think I'm a child, I won't be able to take whatever you're discussing? Wasn't what I already went through enough to prove to you both that I'm no longer the little girl who needs help?"

"June..."

"Come on--" they start simultaneously with the same look in their eyes, and I knew they weren't going to explain to me what's going on till it's too late again. I'll always be the last to know anyway, why am I even trying.

I grab my purse and coat and head to the door, "don't even try." I tell them with a twisted face and leave.

Best life? I'm nowhere close, am I?

》》》

I  needed a distraction so I watched BTS rehearse a little as soon as I arrived, it was healing but I needed to go, I was on a job.

My mind went back to what my brothers were discussing, It was definitely something they want to hide from me again. I need to find out.

Shortly after, I started feeling guilty about storming out on them like that... but they will keep me oblivious to whatever it is if I don't at least show them that I'm not okay with it.

I didn't do anything wrong. It's okay.

I sigh and prop my back against one of the tables. They're running late, I note when I make my time check, they're supposed to start getting dressed by now.

I take out my phone to pass some time, and ten minutes go by... that doesn't happen, they never run late. I sigh and open the dressing room's door, the corridors are empty when I look outside. I start worrying a little, but I tell myself that I'm overreacting and they're just perfecting their rehearsal like the perfect boys they are.

All for us, I flick imaginary tears of a proud ARMY and sniff then go back in and shut the door. I'm just slipping my phone back into my pocket when the door flies open, revealing a panting Namjoon and Taehyung.

Their faces are drawn into those of worry and shock, and I only manage to reflect their expressions as they catch their breaths.

"Jin Hyung is hurt. It's an emergency."

"You said you took nursing classes right?"

I don't get to know who said what, before Taehyung takes my hand and pulls me as we follow Namjoon.

What happened to Jin? My hands start to shake, and I forget that my heart may be shaking too.

《《《

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 400 VIEWS THIS WEEK. I WANTED TO UPDATE EARLY BUT THE CHAPTER WASN'T READY OOP--

Jin will be the first to be saved by nurse June hehe. Tell me what you think of this chapter in the comments! I love you all so much, stay safe! 💜💜.

the 25th of the 6th of 2020, a full 4 months before my birthday.