_Chapter 61~ Best Friends_

He would be crazy if he thought I would just go.

I would be even crazier to actually go.

Though, considering I was stalking towards the destination, limbs moving as stiffly as a robot, I guess this meant I lost all means of my sanity.

>>> I know I shouldn't even be asking this of you, considering what I put you through, but I'm begging you. Please. This isn't a trap, I swear on my life. I just... want to see you.

My legs came to a halt at the threshold of the park. As soon as they did, my legs felt like lead—I couldn't move them again. The quiet of the night only spurned the arrival of goosebumps across my arms. It wasn't as if I was willing to trust him again. Not like I believed if I saw him things could return to how they were. I'd long given up hope on that.

I'd hurriedly told Aki I had to go and left a frazzled him and Satoru after grabbing my coat and racing out the doors. If they were to find out about how stupid I was being about all this, I didn't know how I would be able to face them. I was even willing to smack myself upside the head to come back to my senses.

He wasn't someone I could have faith in. What he did wasn't something I could just nonchalantly forget about and laugh. And if I was gullible enough to believe a text would somehow change that fact, I definitely deserved the repercussions that would undoubtedly follow.

      As soon as I galled up the courage, I moved my feet forward. I kept my eyes peeled, cautious, as I did. The eeriness of the park at night only added to my uneasiness as I shuffled on. It was after I arrived towards the rear end of the park where the headlights and benches were positioned did I see him.

     He was seated, dressed so flimsy as a grey t-shirt and black sweats. His chestnut hair that typically maintained a subtle quiff was now matted to his forehead as he twiddled his thumbs rather anxiously.

      But he was right there, in front of me.  Waiting for me.

      All at once, I regretted coming.

Right as I took a step back to leave before he could see me, he'd heard the ruffle of my sneakers. Daichi's head jerked upwards, his eyes as wide as saucers. He clambered to his feet in a clumsy matter. "R-Reina!" he shouted, newfound relief breaching his features. "You came—"

      "Don't flatter yourself," I cut him off, my heartbeat hitching up in my ears. I sent him the dirtiest look I owned, venom slipping into my tone, "What the hell do you want from me?"

      Daichi momentarily appeared discouraged. He gaped—almost, heartbroken. Soon enough, he settled himself, averting his gaze to the ground in an act to recollect his thoughts. "I... I know an apology...."

      "Is this why you called me out here?" I demanded incredulously. "To apologize?

      Daichi once again, stiffened. His eyes were wide as he swallowed hard. His voice was so faint—so weak. "No," he confessed, gritting his teeth. "I didn't. I can't, anyway. Not after everything I did to you."

     I wasn't able to believe my ears as I stared at him in disbelief. A scoff push past my lips before I realized it and I laughed humourlessly, looking around. "Where are the cameras; the swarm of delinquents that are going to make their appearance to hurt me? Why not instead of putting on your pathetic acting you just give it to me straight. What is it this time? Are you and Miyabi going to tie me up and shove me off a cliff to kill me? Will that make you feel good about yourselves?"

      Daichi vigorously shook his head, sincerity pooling into his hazel eyes. "Reina—"

     "And if there aren't any delinquents... and any cameras," I went on, my voice riding an octave, "I'm going to have to freakin' demand you tell me what you're trying to do. Is it because you're moving away you're suddenly starting to feel bad?"

      Daichi stepped forward despite the trembling of his limbs. His family must've already told him about my visit. "That's not it!" he proclaimed, choking out his words. "Reina, I swear—"

     "Don't say my name," I snapped, furling my fingers into fists. "Not my first name; like you're my friend."

      Daichi recoiled. The silence that hung in the air afterwards was terrible. The pain that overfilled my chest made it hard to breathe. Why was he looking so vulnerable—like he regretted everything? I wasn't going to take any of this! After everything he put me through he wanted to make amends? As simple as that? He was delusional if he believed I would fall for his lies again.

      "Oh, that reminds me," I spoke up again, catching his gaze. "Before you go you might as well take this knife out of my back. I'm sure you'll need it again."

      Daichi appeared so dejected at my words. He tried his best to shrug it aside, mustering a means of bravery. The actor he was I tell you.

      "I... I need to tell you something," Daichi murmured.

      "I see," I responded with a nod. "And I'm supposed to care because?"

      Daichi bit his lip. "Look, I get you don't trust me anymore."

      "Well aren't you Einstein."

      "—and that what I'm asking for is incredibly based off my delusions," Daichi went on, balling his fists. "But even so, before I leave at least...."

      Rolling my eyes, I sneered, "Daichi, you're talking so much shit right now I don't know whether to offer you a breath mint or toilet paper."

       "I'm serious!" Daichi shouted. "Believe me, there are no delinquents and there are no cameras—it's just you and me here I promise."

       I scoffed. "There's no need for you to reiterate it; I heard your crap lie just fine the first time."

       "Kikuchi!" Daichi pleaded, anguish slipping into his tone. "I'm begging you! Hear me out!"

       "So you can toy with me again? I don't think so," I spat with scorn. "Oh, c'mon. I don't know who you're trying to get sympathy from—"

       "Please," he whimpered, lodging my voice in my throat. "You don't have to believe me... but just listen to me! If you don't at least do that... I don't think I'll be able to live with myself...."

      My eyelids rose a fraction when I caught tears tipping over and out of his eyes. They ran down his cheeks until he was an unappealing, sobbing mess.

       "I-I know I can't apologize to you," he started, choking out the words, "and that no matter what I say it won't be able to nullify anything I've done to do. Even so... I'm sorry. I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for ever asking to work on that project together; for making you drunk; for handing you a bouquet of daisies I knew you had an allergy to; for being all cheery and pretending I was your ally when I was just a pathetic mole—everything. Every horrible thing I've done since I met you, I regret it. I regret it so much it torments me every second of every day."

      I was still in place, fazed. My heart was heavy, shattered. I couldn't make sense of the piling emotions overwhelming me at once. Tears stung the corners of my eyes as the back of my hand went over my mouth. Why was he sobbing like that? He still expected I'd buy this?

      "But Miyabi... even when I met him in middle school... he was just so scary," Daichi went on, a whimpering, stuttering mess. "I know it seems a little late now, but it wasn't as if I wanted to become his underling—he's the one that approached me out of nowhere and threatened to hurt my family. So I worked from them on—no matter what. Even if it was to hurt somebody—to hurt Satoru Ryutaro the delinquent that threw his brother into the hospital. E-even if it meant using a girl named Reina Kikuchi to accomplish it.

      "At first I didn't think much of it, and approached you like I did, but you were so, extremely so, kind to someone like me. I kept having second thoughts. You liked my favourite band, TV shows and music; even though we didn't see eye to eye most times you thought so highly of someone like me. You saw and treated me like a friend. And when I... when I realized I had begun to think the same thing—that's what ruined me.

      "Whenever I asked Miyabi to reconsider using you, he always hurt me. He has unbelievable anger issues—behind that terrifyingly careless, flamboyant persona he put on. But no matter what I asked, he didn't deliver. No, it began to escalate. He made me make you drunk, instigate your allergies—he told me to do whatever it took to gather as much dirt I could get on Satoru, while he took his own methods like getting you sent to the hospital... And I—"

      "Still did it," I finished for him, unable to stop the tremor that surpassed with my voice. "Wh-why are you saying all this? To get my sympathy? To make me forgive you? Even if you 'regretted it' like you claim, you still went with it. Instead of confiding in me like the friend you were you kept it to yourself."

      "Because Miyabi is that frightening!" Daichi exploded, snivelling even more. "I-if I did try to go to other people for help, they wouldn't help me. Those puppy-eyed delinquents that surrounded you couldn't even stand their ground against that snake. And if I told you, who knew what he would do to you. I couldn't risk that!"

      "So you're saying you did all this to protect me?" I demanded, pushing back the lump in my throat. "What utter bullshit."

      "I know... I know better than anyone that I'm selfish—inhuman. You thought so kindly of me and yet I was only grasping for my own safety." Daichi removed his glasses and brought his hands to his eyes to rub away the tears that only seemed to stream down his face. "B-but can you blame me? I was suffering since middle school—hurt so many people in brawls and the use of blackmail... and yet it happens that in my second year at Akelius that the person I thought to be no different from all the others was somebody I came to love as my best friend. Believe it or not, but I saw you as my best friend, too. And I still do. But for hurting you and backstabbing you the way I have, these words don't deserve to come out of my mouth."

     Trembling, I swallowed hard. I bit on my lower lip, ducking my head.

      "Reina— I mean, Kikuchi. I didn't come here to ask for you forgiveness. I don't expect you to give it. If I were you, I'd probably have called the cops on me or something... but even so... I wanted to tell you what Miyabi is planning to do before it's too late. He doesn't know I'm leaving and he's already lost his patience. But one he finds out that fact he'll probably gather a ton of people to immediately hurt Satoru and you."

      He extended a tucked piece of paper he'd pulled from his pocket out towards me, and I stared at it, void of emotion. "Am I supposed to just take this paper and trust whatever's written on it?"

      "I wouldn't blame you for thinking that way," Daichi said, pushing it into my fingers anyway. "But, at least read what it says."

      I don't make that promise. Another heaviness sifted through the air. Daichi breathed in and out, as if finally able to intake oxygen.

       "You're very demanding," I murmured after a pause, clenching and nearly crumpling the sheet due to how hard I was holding it. "I'd think you'd have more shame than this."

        It stunned me into silence when Daichi flashed me a smile—as warm and genuine as they always were. It was then it became apparent that maybe he wasn't lying. Those smiles he wore weren't fake. Those laughs he shared with me; those times of adventure and sadness—he hadn't faked a single thing.

      "I've been pathetic and shameful since you met me, and I still am that weakling today," Daichi said. "But regardless of Miyabi, what I first told you...."

       "What you first told me?"

       "I told you I'd have your back, remember? You really helped me out with Ms. Osaka."

The memory seemed to hit me along with a torrent of emotions.

       "I'm glad I was able to help you and all, but you don't have to go out of your way for me," I told him honestly. "Let's just move on from that."

       "No way!" he refuted. "You saved my butt, Kikuchi. From now on I'm sticking by you no matter what."

       "I don't know," I drawled. "That doesn't sound very appealing."

       "Doesn't matter. I'm sticking by my words."

       "You really expect me to believe that?"

       "I already swore on it."

       "That's a pretty big promise."

       "I'm not going to take it back."

       I placed my chin onto my palm, extending my lower lip. "So you mean to tell me you'll be sticking by me every second of every day from eight o'clock to three?"

       "Yup."

"Though I might've not when I first said it, now I can sincerely say I mean every word," Daichi promised. "If you ever need me, no matter the time, or where I am, I'll come running to make it up to you."

        My heart stopped in my chest at once.

       "No matter how much I say it, it won't be enough. But I'll say it anyway: I'm sorry for hurting you, Reina," he said, ruefully chuckling as he did. "I bet you're thankful I'm leaving tonight; you deserve a much better best friend."

       I didn't come to terms with what had happened very quick, but Daichi had turned and left the premises. I was left alone in the park, uneasy, broken. I was a complete mess inside; somebody that couldn't withhold their own weight.

       It was as if whatever had been keeping me standing through all the pressure before, disappeared, leaving me weak in the knees. As I teetered back, somebody caught me in their arms. It didn't even take a moment for me to realize who it was.

        "I made it too obvious didn't I?" I dryly choked, gratefully leaning into his warmth.

        "You wouldn't run out like that for no reason," Satoru responded, enclosing his arms around me further. "You should've just told me to come with you. How about if this was a trap?"

         "Like you'd even let me leave in the first place," I snorted. "And if it was a trap, I was ready to deal with it myself for being an idiot to come alone."

       I couldn't withhold the sob that ripped through me. I covered my hands over my mouth, my entire soul feeling as vacant as it did that one day.

        "If only it was a trap," I whimpered.

        Satoru seemed to understand and remained silent. What Daichi had tried to accomplish today, maybe it had worked. But even if it did, that didn't change anything. It couldn't—not anymore. And now that he was leaving the city the sentiments remaining inside of me didn't matter one bit. It couldn't give me hope for a fresh start. Nothing could repair what we had already lost.

          I never saw Daichi Sugiyama again.