I wrote a letter/poem to a person/group of people, not supposed to be an attack on their characters, but I would  really appreciate it if you read all the way through it and share it. It's called Dear Lucky. BTW you might want to play bonfires in the streets or I do not have the power by Grace Petrie. No art today, just anger.

(TRIGGER WARNING FOR SLURS, RAPE, MURDER, SUICIDE, OVERDOSE, HOMOPHOBIA, TRANSPHOBIA, SWEARING AND BAD STUFF IN GENERAL)

Dear Lucky (And Other Neutrals),

You are neutral,

You say.

That you don't support LGBT people

But you aren't against them.

You say

You are anti anti LGBT

But that being LGBT is against your beliefs.

I laugh a little.

Then I say,

YOU'RE LUCKY.

YOU don't chew your nails to shreds as thoughts of your body littering the ground because you were in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person.

YOU don't have to hide your art under your mattress when your grandparents come over.

YOU don't master the headphone grab as the comedian on the radio shrieks about the sassy fags and ugly dykes to a laughing audience.

YOU don't need to choose between your friends and self respect.

YOU don't try and find your ever sinking heart as people cast you and your people as dirty and inappropriate and pedophilic.

YOUR breath doesn't lodge in your throat as you imagine slogging through the blood of gay men, lesbians, bisexuals, trans people, and anyone who didn't act straight enough as you walk down Main Street.

YOU don't get stabbed in the gut and crumple to the floor as your classmates argue for conversion therapy.

YOU don't stand and stare as your "allies" pack up their bags and shrug off your hate crimes and homelessness and housing discrimination and suicides now that gay marriage is legal.

You're so damn, damn, damn shitty fucking lucky.

I'll ask you this,

Are you FUCKING neutral as the cops you coo over blow out the brains of black trans women in the streets?

Are you FUCKING neutral as people beat and starve and strangle and abuse the life out of us, especially those of who are darker skinned, who are trans, who are women, who can't pass?

Are you FUCKING neutral as a mother beats the living shit out of her four year old son for "talking like a fag?"

Because let me tell you this,

You're so fuckin' lucky you got me,

The angry bitchy DYKE who had accepted her homosexuality long before she fucking met you,

Because if you met and hit it off with a baby gay who was a little more insecure of herself, in a little more homophobic of an environment,

You would have been one of the reasons she would have hated herself.

You would have been one among many taught her that queers shouldn't be talked about it, that they don't deserve the same respect as heterosexuals,

You would have been one among many to teach her they shouldn't exist in literature,

You would have been one among many to teach her to hide her sexuality, that's it's uncomfortable for others,

At least, that's what I learned from you.

If you were lucky, she would move on from you, grapple with her miles of self hatred that YOU helped plant, and emerge alive.

If you weren't lucky, she would trek on down to the pharmacy, pocket a bottle of OxyContin, and choke all the little pills down in her bedroom.

Do you still not FUCKING see the link between your "neutrality" and violence and abuse and hatred and fetishization and erasure and rape that has been irreplaceable part of our history?

Do you ever think for a DAMN SECOND that your "neutrality" allows homophobic attitudes to fester among you, which allows fag jokes to happen, which then leads to bullying, which leads to suicide and murder and assault and rape? That maybe instead of trying to polite homophobes at the end of the cycle you should nip it in the shitty fucking bud?

You have the damn PRIVILEGE of being neutral.

You have the FUCKING PRIVILEGE of treating my fucking life and rights and dignity and respect like a game, like a toy, because it doesn't affect you what so fuckin' ever. It's a game that at worst makes you look like an asshole. It's a game that at worst will cost me my life.

You have the SHITTY ASS PRIVILEGE  of turning your eyes away from the homophobia and transphobia your neutrality brings, despite your 'attempts' at weeding at the more violent homophobia, the kind that makes you look oh so bad.

I don't have that.

My choices are to fight or hate myself.

Let me tell you a secret:

Your neutrality isn't neutrality, it's tacitly supporting the status quo, DESPITE that you liked a Stucky pic one time, DESPITE that you occasionally reblog something like "don't bully transgendereds".

You wanna know what the fuckin' status quo is?

It's 1 in 12 trans women being murdered, 1 in 8 if they aren't white.

It's people trying to fucking blame the Orlando Shooting on everything, BUT homophobia.

It's queer history erased, queer achievements chalked up to benevolent straight allies.

Oh sure, most people support gay marriage and wouldn't dare a gay person a fag to their face,

But if pro-LGBT was the norm, then I wouldn't be FUCKING writing this.

By the way,

Do you know that the first PRIDE fest was a riot where police busted into a queer bar to assault and arrest us for the millionth time and we said enough is fucking enough and fought back?

Do you know that the government sat back and did FUCKING NOTHING as our dying bodies piled up from the HIV crisis? That our corpses lined the sidewalk?

Do you know that it WAS AND IS legal to murder queers in most of America as along as you claim that the a person being gay/trans was so fucking shocking that they just slit their throats defense?

So are you still fucking neutral now? Are our lives still a debate to support to us? Or are we too FUCKING angry and irrational?

What would it take for you to support us?

How many battered and bruised QUEERS would you climb over before you decide to lend us a hand?

How many trans men should be towed from the backs of pickup trucks before we deserve compassion?

How much fuckin' fag blood would you bathe in before YOU got off your ass from lightly chastising homophobes and help us?

How many lesbians and bi women should be raped before we're FUCKING WORTHY?

How many intersex people need to be mutilated to shove them into the false binary between male and female before a spark of compassion makes you fight against all DAMN queerphobia, not just the direct casualties that your neutrality causes?

Because here's a tip:

If you refuse fucking listen to me and make it all about your feelings because I'm pissed off about being a second class citizen then you sure as hell won't listen to me when I'm all nice and patient and forgiving and hide my hurt.

I've tried being nice and patient as I baby step people to try and fucking believe in my dignity, but all that got me was a bunch of scars and people pitying me at best.

But it's your choice---After all, support of my dignity and rights and respect and damn fucking life is just another vanilla vs chocolate, superman vs batman, silly inconsequential debate for you and every other straight moderate like you.

It's not just you after all.

I hope this gets your attention. I don't hate you, but maybe that's just a silly wish. I hope you can find some compassion and strength in your heart and consider my words.

Sincerely,

Your Favorite Angry Dyke,

Slime