Ezra's P.O.V

I couldn't sleep.

My mind was still trying to figure out what bothered me earlier. Caleb Dume? Caleb Dume? Caleb Dume? Familiar in many ways but none of the dots could connect to the main point.

I sat up on the old couch and it gave a squeak.

Kanan had found an old apartment that was far out on the edge of the city and abandoned. Well, not completely abandoned. There were still small critters and bugs that made a home here.

Disgusting, I know, but it was the best option to get some rest. Besides, I've slept in way more worse conditions. Yet, I was restless. My mind didn't didn't want to sleep with all these thoughts and repulsive nightmares.

I sighed and looked over at the Jedi sleeping peacefully on an arm chair. Quietly as possible, I sat up and stood, flinching every time the couch squeaked. Luckily, Kanan was still asleep. He must be in a deep sleep if he didn't wake up.

For some reason, it bothered me. Kanan is never that off guard, especially in this kind of situation. What could he be dreaming about? The Jedi's face scrunched up some as if something was causing him pain.

I wanted to wake him up, yet something stopped me. The Force. It told me to leave him alone. Why would it want me to do that?

Kanan's eyes opened and he sat up in distress. I jumped a bit out of my skin at the sudden movement. He looked up at me and sighed in relief then looked down and scrubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"A-Are you okay?" I asked, worried. He nodded and said, "Yeah, I'll live."

"What were you dreaming about?" I asked.

"Honestly, I don't know," he muttered, "It might be some kind of vision but it's hard to decipher."

I sealed my lips from asking another question. He seemed so far away but was only a couple feet in front of me. Distracted was a better term and confused. I didn't want to ask things he didn't want to answer or if he had an answer.

Kanan looked back up at me and asked, "What are you doing up this late?" I turned my attention to the floor and wonder if I should tell him or not. I was still mad but not as much as before. When everything settled and calmed down after arriving here. It gave me time to get my thoughts arranged.

"Come on," he said, standing, leading me over to the couch gently. We both sat down next to each other in silence.

"Now, tell me what's on your mind and I'll do my best to help," he spoke, calmly. For a moment, it felt like the old times where I could tell Kanan anything. I wish it were so but all of it changed after being rescued.

The secrets.

The lies.

The hurt.

It was all there and nothing felt the same ever since. I wish I could tell them about my nightmares but that stayed secret. I wish I could call them my family but that would be a lie. I wish that I could be more useful but knew it would further hurt me more.

In a way, I was causing all of this distress. It scared me to know the truth and terrifies me more to see their reaction. Kanan changed on the first day going back to Jedi training. It scared me but now, he's almost back to his old self.

I took a deep breath.

"Kanan..." I started, quietly, "I'm scared."

The man didn't seem all to surprised at that. I continued, "You guys have been treating me differently ever since I was rescued. This secret scares me. The nightmares every night, won't end. Yet, out of all of that, the only thing that bothers me is you."

I finally looked up after confessing everything. Kanan seemed taken back by that.

"Why?" He asked, confused.

"Out of everyone, you changed the most. On the first day of training, when we talked in my room, and even in this situation. We've fought. The secrets that you, Sabine, Hera, and maybe Zeb and Chopper, kept." I shook my head in disbelief.

"It's like I don't know you guys anymore," I admitted, sadly," and it scares me...like...like." My mind tried to think of the right word to use.

"Like you can't trust us anymore," he answered and I looked down, hiding my face in the veil of hair. I heard him sigh then felt a weight on my shoulder. This caused me to flinch a little.

   "Ezra...I'm so sorry," he spoke. The way he apologized made me perk up. It felt so raw and caring that I turned to make eye contact with the Jedi. Sadness and guilt were enveloped in those green eyes. I faced the floor again and replied.

   "I'm sorry, too."

   "You did nothing wrong," he argued and I denied it.

   "I should of put more effort into training and thought quickly. If I would've done that then we wouldn't be in this situation in the first place and-"

   Arms wrapped me suddenly, stopping any thought of what was about to be said next. I was to shocked to continue to argue.

   "You listen to me, right here and now. Nothing was your fault. I should of been watching you closer but instead, let out all my frustration. You may not know it, kid but I care about you and hearing you say this...it hurts."

   I stiffened but let him continue.

   "I know I'm not the best master but I'm attempting to be that and a good mentor. It's just hard."

   I relaxed and returned the embrace, melting into warmth more, saying, "I don't want the best. I want you." Kanan chuckled a little before replying, "Thanks, kid."

   I smiled the largest I have since my rescue. I finally felt like my old self again, almost. Everything is going back to normal but, there were still two more things that I need to ask. We separated after a while of hugging.

   "Kanan, I know you may not want to talk about it, but who's Caleb Dume?" I asked. The air thickened between us as a shadow came across his face. I shifted uncomfortably on the couch.

   "Y-You don't need to answer that," I quickly said but he shook his head.

   "No, it's time you knew a little bit more about me," he said. I looked at him in disbelief.

   Things were about to get a little more interesting.

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