"Can I go where you go?
Can we always be this close forever and ever?
And ah, take me out, and take me home
You're my, my, my, my lover."

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

Anushka

Day 359

For Anushka, it was never love at first sight. It happens in sequence—a set of conspiracies which lead her to fall in love with her husband, Virat Kohli.

She fell a little in love him, when she saw him smile a genuine smile when he met the little orphan Ansh, she had taken under her wing.

She fell a little in love with him, when she saw him playing cricket with Ansh on the field.

She fell a little in love with him, when they decide to make love for the first time. She had confessed, 'I am not a virgin, Virat.' to which he only replied, 'So what, Anushka? Neither am I.'

She fell a little in love with him, when he cooked the food when she was sick and the house staff was on leave.

Now, she is falling hard and fast. When they make love, both do not see the elephant in the room: their marriage is to last only for one year.

He leans over her, eyes devouring, hands exploring with expertise, arousing her with feather touches, light strokes, scratching, tickling and pulsing. Her lips are half parted, eyes heavily lidded and breath shortened. His moans drive her crazy.

It's not forever, she tries to berate herself, then how could you fall in love with your husband?

A minute later when they can catch their breaths finally, she asks, "Mama has kept a small party this week. Do you think you can come with me?"

"Hmm." he hums in response, then presses his lips to her temple. "We will be touring Australia next week."

"Oh." Anushka already knew. She also knew that this time the wives and girlfriends were also allowed to join the tour. But he never asks, and she never gets to squeal in joy, and say, 'Yes!'.

"Oh indeed." And then he wraps her arms around her waist. Nights like these were not forever so she decides to make the best of the time they had together.

Just before he sleeps, she turns on to her side, burrowing her head against his shoulder and sighs dreamily in her sleep.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

Not him. She groans inwardly, when she sees the man she thought she was in love with for half her life. They would have been married now if Anushka's parents wouldn't have arranged her marriage with Virat.

It was Virat's idea that they be married for a year, and then separate amicably because he also didn't have his heart in the marriage but his grandmother was dying, and he had to fulfill her last wish.

When the men in the house wander away, her cousin, Sarah looks at them and gives out a romantic sigh. "He's too handsome, isn't he, Anu?"

"Yes," she chuckles. She will never get used to people fawning over her husband.

Sarah leans across the table to whisper something inappropriate—Anushka knows her cousin all too well—when they are interrupted by a new arrival.

"May I join you ladies?" he asks. Anushka stares at him in bewilderment. Reyaan had met her earlier on several occasions but he never did gather the nerves to ask her to talk personally. Well, there of course, was Sarah with them.

"Of course." Sarah beams in response.

Reyaan and Sarah chat about movies and books. Anushka listens to him as Reyaan talks, his pleasant voice and handsome face. He surely knew how to charm—had always known which made him popular in the neighborhood and college. Was it any wonder why an inexperienced, shy wallflower like her would fall in love with this living golden Adonis? But she knew there was no substance in the love she had harbored for him during their time together.

Maybe she was being too hard on him. If they had the chance to nurture their love, maybe she would have fallen as deeper as she was with Virat now.

Maybe she will fall out of love with Virat too, if she gave herself the time and distance.

"Anushka, care for a stroll?" Reyaan asks with a charming smile.

She looks for Virat, who was playing badminton with one of the guests.

"Sure." she says, getting up on her feet. But she ignores his offered arm, and pretends to straighten her dress.

When they were set across the lawn's far off end, Reyaan grips her elbow. "Anu, jaan, how is it that you look more beautiful than ever?"

How could she reply to something like that? "I did not expect you to come here. Thought you would be abroad for business or something." she says instead.

Reyaan shrugs. "I decided to take a break from dad. Also, I wanted to see you. I heard Mr. Singhania saying Virat will be going for his tour soon. Will you be going with him too?"

She stifles her tears when she replies, "No."

"Oh, jaan." he breaks into a smile. "I will be in Delhi for next two months, I think. I will be here to comfort you."

She feels sick in her stomach. "There's no comfort you can offer me, Reyaan."

"Oh, come on, Anushka! We were friends before. More than friends in fact. I'm sure we can be more than friends again."

They both plaster polite smiles for the sake of appearances, giving a nod to guests who were in sight.

"Did you ever have any intention of marrying me?" she asks, trying to mask the incredulity on her face.

"In my hopes and dreams, Anushka." Reyaan says without hesitation. "But dad would have never agreed to our marriage. But I love you, Anu. I still love you, and I think, I will always love you."

Anushka wants to laugh at his sugar coated words. But the truth is, he was never a villain in her life. Maybe she had always known that they weren't meant to happen, but she had been denying the truth to herself.

"The very thought of someone else touching you makes me mad with jealousy. Does he—has he touched you, Anu?"

"Reyaan," Anushka reprimands him from speaking any further. "The state of my marriage is none of your concern. We were friends, once. More than friends. The point is, it was all in the past. And there can be nothing again. Not now. Not ever."

"But he will forget you. He will be gone for a long time, Anu. And then you will come for me."

"Never. I am married to him, Reyaan. For better, for worse. We've made promises to each other. I will not betray, Virat. I will remain loyal and faithful to him in every way possible. Goodbye."

She strides off, in anger, in frustration, in pain and joins her husband in the dining hall. When their gazes meet, she smiles on the outside. He smiles in return.

Inside, her heart shatters, just a little.

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

Virat

Day 365

"Did you win?" she asks, joining his side with her beguiling smile.

"I did," Virat replies, looking keenly at her. Even though I was distracted, he wants to add.

They are seated on the swing near Anushka's old room. "I talked to Reyaan just now."

"I know," he replies.

"Do you not want to know what we talked about?"

Virat shrugs, even though on the inside, he wants to throttle the guy. And berate him for his idiocy, for letting go a girl like Anushka. "I think he wants you to continue to see him. He must have said he is still in love with you, etcetera. He must have proposed an extra martial affair with all the cloying words, of course." he answers tonelessly.

Anushka blinks at him in surprise. It was no surprise for him though, Reyaan was an idiot, period, for throwing her away.

But wasn't he doing the same? He wanted to ask her to join him in his tour, the other night but he chickened out in the end. She had so many things keeping her here: Ansh, her art exhibition, her charity work, her family. So many important things.

And he was—well, not important—just her husband.

"Don't you want to know what I replied?" she asks, biting her lower lip.

"That too, I know, Anushka." he sighs exasperatedly. "You are very honorable and loyal. You would never break your wedding vows, never disrespect the sanctity of our marriage. You would rather live in celibacy rather than being unfaithful to me, will you not?"

She lowers her gaze. "Will you care if I do not? When you will be gone?"

"Like you said, I won't be around you to care, Anu." I reply coldly. "I refuse to be your conscience."

"Yeah, right." Her eyes are black and unfathomable but he notices a flicker of hurt in them.

Virat wonders he might know how to win these frivolous badminton matches, important tournaments, everything. But does he know how to win happiness?

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

"You will forget me." Ansh whines when Virat tucks him in his bed.

"I can never forget you, my boy. I . . . love you, Ansh." He kisses his brow.

"Nobody stays forever," Ansh sighs in resignation. He was too mature for a guy of tender age of nine.

"I will always be with you, Ansh." Virat tells him. "I promise, I will try."

The little boy turned himself, and covered his head with the blankets. Virat leaves his room, softly closing the door, grinning to himself.

He was never the one who gambled his fortunes. Neither in cricket, nor in real life. But he still feels very light-hearted even though he was going to gamble away with the one thing he never had taken a chance with: his heart.

He opens the door, when he sees Anushka waiting for him at the bed. They made love for all the past five days. He was at least savoring every moment spent with her during the day as well as night.

"Ansh is sleeping," he voices out, then feels a little nervous when he adds, "take a blanket and come outside."

Anushka frowns. "Blanket?"

"We are going to sleep under the stars tonight." he declares, clutching two pillows in his hands.

"One last night?" she whispers out aloud.

"One last night." When the ticking bomb would be looming over their head. It will either implode with them or stop ticking once and for all.

Anushka clings to his hands when they walk outside in the lawn. The night was unnervingly dark even with a lonely moon hanging, surrounded by blanket of stars. Virat's heart hammered too fast when she leisurely lies on the blanket. He leans down and sleeps beside her, staring at her as she watches the sky above.

"The sky must end somewhere. All good things come to end. Everything turns into void eventually." she breaks the silence with those gloomy words.

"Perhaps. But some things don't end. They just evolve." He answers. "Can we—that is—do you want to make love tonight?"

He never asked and that's why he was slightly terrified. The first time they had slept with each other, it just kind of happened because they had a stupid fight over something, and were too swept away with passion. And then, after that, all the times, it just happened. No words spoken, no questions asked, no confessions made.

He is terrified because he was going to wear his heart on his sleeve tonight, and he could only hope she does not break it. But he felt hope inside because he had seen her disorientation when he said, 'I won't be around to care, Anu'. Maybe, just maybe, she didn't want this to end either.

"Yes," she smiles, her eyes sparkling and when her palm grazes his cheek in soft caress.

"Come on top of me, today." I say against her lips, trying to lift her but she shakes her head. "The ground could be uncomfortable for you."

"No," she rolls on to her back. "I want it this way. Please."

They do not dare to remove all of their clothes, when he looms over her, makes love to her. He feels the unifying, powerful, deep emotion of physical desire and emotional need that transpires between them. This time he makes love to her slowly, thoroughly aware of her—because it could be the very last time. He feels her soft, silky skin, her sweet smell and the small moans she makes when she's too swept with passion.

"Anu." he brings his lips to hers and softly murmurs, "my love. I love you. I love you so much. This is my love I give you tonight."

"Mmm." she says, deep in her throat again.

Virat loses his nerve. He fears she would speak, so he kisses her, and deepens the kiss not letting her speak.

He gives them some time to catch their breath, and then turns on his side to face her. "Anushka, I'm so sorry about Reyaan—" he begins the grand speech he had prepared for her tonight but she cuts him off.

"You need not be," she says. "You know, I did love him, Virat. Or maybe, I thought I was in love with him. But he was not the man I thought him to be. Maybe if we married, I would have eventually realized it. He is not the man I could love forever. For a lifetime."

If he cannot let out his grand speech in one go, he could insert it into this conversation naturally. "What kind of man would you love for a lifetime then?"

She is silent for a while, deeply immersed in thoughts. "A kind man," she starts. "When we are young and foolish, we don't realize how important it is to have compassion. A man who honors his words."

His heart sinks on both accounts. He was not kind, he was selfish because he couldn't let her go. And he was going back on his promise of keeping this marriage for one year. He was not a man of his word either.

"A strong man," she continues. "Strong enough to be vulnerable when he knows he is taking such a huge risk. A man who would place himself in the center of my world when I had never done such thing, or told him that I was willing to do so. A man foolish and brave enough at the same time to tell me that he loves me even though I never dared to show any signs that I loved him in return—"

"Anu—"

"—he must be tall, but not too tall. Must have a beard so when I kiss him, my face tickles and my heart flutters. Must have strong jaws and must be athletic enough so that when I'm angry at him and run away, he runs after me too. And he should smile. Not the polite smiles he gives to the rest of the world but that smile which lights up my entire world."

Oh my God.

"—he must be you, Virat. I won't take anyone else for the life of me. He has to be you. Every inch, every corner, every cell. And it's a good thing that we're already married, so I don't have to go around and look for someone with a magic lamp who is you."

"I—"

She doesn't let him speak. Again. "You did mean when you said 'I love you', right? I hope it was not in the heat of passion." she asks.

"Of course, I meant it. I prepared a goddamn speech so that I could make you stay."

"You are so much braver than I." She muses, then suddenly narrows her eyes at him. "Well, you were not being brave when you told me about your Australian tour that night."

"No. I was not," he admits. "I did arrange tickets for you and Ansh though. I just couldn't let those words out that night. Would you want to go with me?"

She smiles, then softly whispers in his ear. "My love, where you lead, I'll always follow you."

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

Author's note: MOC tropes are one of my favourites! This one was in the drafts for so long. I hope you liked it! Do vote|comment|share.