There have been few times in my life where I wanted to shit myself. One was in second grade when I farted during my presentation on leaf-nosed bats. I was in between slides and it boomed out unexpectedly. Everyone, even the teacher, laughed and I stood up there for the ten most humiliating minutes of my existence. Another was the summer after middle school when I was on an internship with Lumos, a small STEM academy, and I got stuck in an elevator with a woman that worked there. Trying to ease away the awkward silence, I saw her protruding stomach and congratulated her on being pregnant. Since then, I always take the stairs.

Then there's today, now, on this wooden aisle in front of a large waiting crowd. The room has grown deathly silent and I'm sure you would be able to hear someone's finger tap echo off the walls. My eyes dart across the crowd and my throat is parched, I have no idea what to say-I can't believe I forgot the speech!

I'm so screwed, everyone is already doing that uncomfortable shift in their seats.

"Um..." I tightly grip the mic in my hands, desperately racking my brain for something. Even just the starter sentence could help me. But it's not there. I've totally blanked. My feverish gaze lands on Jason in the front row and his eyes hold mine. He's judging me just like everyone else.

His lips began to part, slow and exaggerated in a way I can understand.

This morning.

This morning? What happened this morning? Well, we were talking and I was going on about...the club. Is he telling me to say that?

Well, c'mon, I have to say something. Anything. I look at Jason and he's nodding as if confirming my thoughts.

Say it.

I swallow the large lump in my throat then clear it into the mic. The audience perks.

"A year ago, I was just a girl with an idea-" My voice comes out more feeble than I'd like. "An idea I never thought could go far."

I'm completely winging it. The words don't even process through my brain before they come out of my mouth. It's like a fountain has been switched on and I'm putting my lips to the tap with my eyes closed. What am I drinking? Am I being coherent? I can hardly remember the previous sentences. They're becoming a foggy dream I can't recollect from last week. Only my blunders stick out like nails on a smooth floor.

Everyone must be thinking about how atrocious this is. I've stumbled a few times and I'm positive they can somehow see the beads of sweat trailing down my back.

The whole room is focused on me and I'm trying to look around to engage them, but my eyes keep landing on Jason. He's leaning back in his chair with the same nonchalance he had earlier. I can see his brooding eyes scouring me and the laid-back way his hands rest behind his head.

It's casual, yet earnest. Talk to me. Talk yes, to him...? Should I imagine this as a conversation with him?

Earlier, you dummy. Right, right, our walk. My shoulders relax from the tension that gripped them and the scrutiny of all those countless faces seems to fade away. It's just half the room, the middle section, the front row. And then him.

And I'm talking to just him.

The words I wrote have long flown over my head, but my desire to be heard is grounded in me.

I want all these people to understand my cause, and oddly even more so, I specifically want Jason to care. Now everything is pouring out, wires are connecting and I feel so here. My voice stabilizes and Jason's relentless stare glues me to the moment.

"...a child will never grow up to explore all life truly has to offer. A family will never taste the goodness of a hot meal. People will never know what it means to be at peace. And all these millions of people in corners of the world which most of us never knew existed will never have a clutch of hope. Not without you and me. Not without us."

There's a beat of silence. My lungs have stopped and I'm scared that everything has sounded like rubbish. That I failed to memorize and then failed to understandably speak from my heart.

Then the applause happens. One clap, a dozen, one hundred, and everyone. The cheers are energetic and I try to smile with my frantic heartbeat.

"Thank you!" I exclaim into the microphone and then stride off.

Backstage, the simmering applause is muffled and I'm not sure if they clapped because I was good or because I sucked and they're pitying me. My mind is racing a thousand miles per hour and I feel so utterly stupid for screwing this up. I forgot the fucking words!

Principle Hutchens catches me on my exit. "Great job Madison!" His smile is wide, but for all I know he could be forcing it.

"Uh, thanks!" I say, attempting to sound enthusiastic.

Other teachers compliment me- are their tones patronizing? All I can do is nod at them and rush for the exit. Bursting through the doors, the first thing I do is take a sharp inhale of air. My stomach is clenched with disappointment. I messed up so badly. I should've studied the words for just an hour longer. Would it have been so bad if I had the chance to reread a few more times? Or maybe if I'd just tried to think harder it would've come to me. I wish a genie would pop out so I could wish to turn time back and stay up later memorizing. Or better, I would start the speech a whole week ago so there would be more time.

Dammit!

I pinch my nose bridge between my glasses and screw my eyes together. I angrily pace the empty hallway, my hands digging into my scalp so furiously I think I might go bald. But I don't care because it calms down my boiling blood and prevents me from screaming my frustration.

Stupid, stupid! I got up there and fogged like a complete idiot! I don't even think what I said made any sense- it was so off from the script! And then everyone started clapping because they felt sorry I had fucked up so badly. God, I'm such a failure.

Suddenly, the main door to the auditorium clicks open, and fearing everyone is coming out, I tear my hands away from my head, smooth down my clothes, and scrub under my teary eyes. My legs stiffen and I whip towards the door.

It's Jason.

Seeing him has this odd calming effect on me, and my ruler-straight back falls. A strong urge to collapse into his arms stirs inside me, I fight it, biting my lip as I turn my head away.

His strides are fast-moving and I prepare for him to sneer at me for how horrible I was onstage. He'll say 'nice speech' and I won't even be able to shoot a comeback because I know he's right.

But instead, he takes my hand and leads me away.

"What? Where are we going?"

My heels are clumping behind him as he drags me to an unknown destination. Just as we turn a corner, the auditorium doors explode and bodies come pouring out. Jason rushes us into a janitor's closet and right after the door closes behind us, everything goes black.

Contrary to popular belief, janitor closets are not romantic places. At all.

It's small and tight and smells like old, wet carpets mixed with dirty toilet water. My nose is wrinkling in the stale air-does anyone ever use this place? I feel like we've waltzed into a three-thousand-year-old Egyptian tomb.

I try to move away from the hard shelf that is digging into my spine and I bump into Jason's firm chest. He flicks the light switch and I'm greeted with the sight of him towering over me. I become overly conscious of how handsome he is up close. His skin is immaculate, his face gorgeous with full pink lips. The way his black, wavy curls hang over is adorably sexy. And his lips are stretched into a charming smirk that should be illegal.

The realization that I've been staring pierces my thoughts. I look away, my cheeks flaming, and yank my hands off his hard chest.

"Um..." I step back and bump my head against the shelf. A bucket filled with murky liquid almost splashes over. There's nowhere else to go, dirty mops and bottles of cleaning supplies have occupied the corners. I'm trapped here in this confined space with my heart skittering wildly like a rabbit in the jungle.

"Just say it," I mutter.

My eyes roam the ground. Brown, hardwood floor. How fascinating.

I'm expecting Jason to call me a loser or some other snarky tease in his broken English. Instead, what comes out his mouth leaves my jaw hanging open- I'm sure a million flies could all zoom in at once.

"Maddie, I know you're freaking out about the speech because you forgot the words and all, but you were ama- uh, you weren't bad."

What. The. Hell.

My stage flop is pushed to the back of my mind as the fact that he's speaking complete sentences has me shocked to the bone.

"You-you speak!"

What happened to the accent? Where's the clip to his tone? Is insomnia getting to me and I'm just completely imagining things?

"But how?!"

Jason just laughs.

"Look," he closes the small gap between us by an inch. My eyes dart up to meet his and I press harder against the shelf. His voice softens and a look of concern fills his face. "I just wanted to know if you're okay after being up there and all."

Am I okay? Is he worried about me?

"You know, especially since you fucked up and I had to save you." I roll my eyes. So much for being worried. "You should thank me."

"Th-thank you? As in how?"

The devilish grin he flashes says he wants more than a two-word appreciation.

"Go on a date with me."

A date?! His proposal makes me scoff. First, he reveals that he's secretly fluent in English and now he wants me to go out with him? I take it back- I'm not crazy, he is.

"I'm not going on a date with you." I shoot at him.

He takes a step forward, I take half of one back. That shelf continues to painfully indent into my back and I hear the bucket overhead threatening to empty once more.

"Go on a date with me," he repeats. I see his eyes flick up and then back to me.

"No! And move, I need to get to class before the bell rings." I push against his chest. Bad idea.

I end up bouncing off of him and crash into the shelf with all the trashy contents of the bucket spilling down. "Ohh," I exclaim as foul-smelling- liquid flows down my bra and skirt and drips to my feet. From my head to my toes I am drenched in this disgusting I don't even know what! The smell of it all over me makes me gag.

Jason's face tells me he's holding a laugh and I scowl at him and the fact that he's escaped with barely a splash on his black shirt. He immediately clears his throat.

"I think you might want to get cleaned up."

"Yeah, no shit Sherlock."

"Hold on." He cracks the door open and peers out. Meanwhile, I'm standing with my body spread out as if all my repulsively doused limbs are contagious. If this water is some life-threatening virus, I'm sure it has penetrated into every single one of my cells.

Then Jason takes my cold, wet hands into his warm soft ones and we sneak through the halls. I'm shivering and I think it might be for a reason more than just the frigid water sticking to my skin.

"Here," he says while handing me a t-shirt and psir of shorts that are definitely some sizes too big.

We've crept to the boy's locker room and thankfully everyone is thudding around in the gym already.

I reach out to them hesitantly. "Are you sure you don't need them?"

"Yeah." Jason crosses his arms and leans back on the rows of fire-red lockers. "I don't really go to class anyway. Why, do you think I need to work out more?"

With his godly figure-of course not.

I whip my head around, scared that someone might come in for a bathroom break.

"Okay, thanks then." I turn to leave but he grabs my shoulder. He steps towards me and places his lips against my ear.

"Shh. Let's keep it between us."

His breath tickles and his soft lips lightly brush against my skin. A shiver runs down my spine.

I walk off to the door and take a final look at him. He gives a small smile, one that says, 'It'll be our little secret'.

"I'll see you later, agi."

"Right."

I dash out, euphoric to change into dry clothes- even if they are extra-large on me. As soon as I'm done, I rush as fast as I can to biology. My thoughts are reeling with Jason's secret and the fact that I will be inexcusably late for the first time in my life.

-----------------------

Wait! Before you go, don't forget to FOLLOW, COMMENT, VOTE.

I know you're there....

But that orange star is still empty...

You should probably fix that...

Thx for reading :)