Jungkook's POV

                                                                                                  At 7pm

Keeping the round metal knob fixed to the wooden barrier between my still fingers, my jaw clenched and my toes hidden with the leather material of my shoes curled in frustration.

Standing between the same walls that collapsed on my once pure soul shredding it down to carve scars on it, reminding me of my empty darkness. The same floor that was snatched away from beneath my feet to let me fall to where I belonged that is the depths of pain and suffering and the same people who were the cause of my damage.

I closed my eyes to let my thoughts take over me so that they can console me. Make me understand that it was not their fault, they were unknowingly trapped between her fingers too, as she bathed them with her fake tears and cleaned their minds with her hollow words. She striped their toughness leaving them vulnerable and weak to believe and let them flow with her lies.

Wasting my precious time with the traitor, I had learn one thing that was masking emotions. Following her sinful steps I dropped the veil of my smile on my lips pressed with anger and sadness.

I rotated the firm grip of my fingers around the metal curvature to open the opaque surface with a heavy heart. It is much more hard than I thought. I pushed the solid away from its frame to be welcomed by actual darkness which got illuminated the next second as a scream chased its way to my ears.

"Happy birthday Jungkookie!" a real BIG smile caused by Taehyung hyung pulled down the fake cover. I can never let the membrane of my pain thicken between Taehyung, Jimin hyung and me. They are the door to my old self and Y/N is the key.

I hugged him back, the second he pulled me into his embrace, as he peeled my anger away. "Thank you hyung." I exclaimed with true happiness when Jimin hyung hugged me from the back making it a bear hug of three people, and squeezing me in between.

"Aww...even I am joining." A foreign voice yet a familiar one who was the stairs to Y/N joined in, spreading his arms wide to engulf us all.

The sound of our bright laughter and cheers reverberated between the four walls which I hated with all my heart. But I could feel my grief being evaporated from my soul by hearing their sweet laughter.

I clutched my arms tighter around the  body I was holding onto to until we all lost our balance and end up falling on the ground making the noise twice as loud as the rest chortled on our silliness. We were rolling on the floor in laughter when three pair of hands helped us to get up.

"Finally!" Jimin hyung said as we all stood in a circle facing each other reuniting after months. "Let's cut his birthday cake first." Yoongi hyung said to which Hoseok hyung immediately reacted by going to get a white cuboidal cardboard kept in a corner.

"Here comes the cake." He exclaimed as the others made way for him to bring the cake. I smiled at their efforts, but unknowingly the curve couldn't reach my eyes.

The cylindrical baked product was coated with layers of white cream with colored fruits and candles to hide a fraction of its plain surface. I parted my lips to blow air from between them when everyone else in the room started singing the birthday song.

All of them picked sweet juicy peices  from the cake and fed me wishing me once again.

     
                    10 minutes later

We sat on the ground forming a circle as we savoured the sweetness of the creamy substance. "So... Jin hyung we all haven't heard from you lately what's going on in your life?" Yoongi hyung questioned him, bringing my sharp darkening eyes to meet his softer ones.

"I am moving back to my hometown with Jihee after two months so by that time I continuing with my chef job." Jin hyung gulped after replying him but his apologizing eyes were bold enough to maintain a contact with my piercing orbs.

"But weren't you planning to move out a few days back?" Namjoon hyung asked provoking my inner self to resist the urge of leaving this space instantly. "Yeah we were, but Jihee wants to wait for one of her friends to complete her exam and then move out. So she will be done with her exam in two months, after that she'll greet her and then we'll move out." He explained his plans to others but I just mentally covered my ears for not listening to that traitor's name just once more it is like acid to my ears.

"And Jungkook what about you? does that bossy roommate of yours still trouble you?" Yoongi hyung asked me to quickly divert the topic. "No, he kicked me out about three months ago, so now I am living with Hobi hyung's friend." I said trying my best to hide the instant smile as the question reminded me of Y/N.

"You still live with her?!" Hobi hyung's voice came out a little loud and confused. "Didn't you tell me that you will stay with her only for a few days until you find another place!" Oh shit, how can I not remember this. He is going to get mad if I tell him any further, but I have to, he must know about this. Gathering up the courage that was left inside me, I spoke.

"Actually about that, I don't plan to move out, infact I don't want to move out." I said struggling to put my sentence in a confident voice however my eyes wandered everywhere except for Hobi hyung's fuming eyes in rage.

"Jungkook this is not done. We are practically lying to her, what did you do to her-" his cold yet soft voice was interrupted by Namjoon hyung's confused one. "What is happening , can anyone brief us?" The person who was glaring at me huffed to calm down and narrated the whole incident, from how I pleaded him to help to how we ended up lying that I am not straight.

Jin hyung's jaw dropped at the words left consecutively left hyung's mouth while Namjoon and Yoongi hyung  listened patiently.

"Now before you guys lecture me to tell her the truth and all, I want to say something-" I started. "-I have no idea how but I really really like her, a liking I can't express either in words or actions. She is someone who has dared too enter my darkness with only a candle. The small fire is burning down those memories which I thought wasn't combustible, making it's way deep within, burning and lightning the track behind, and she is not turning back to watch my demons suffer in their own hell."

"Don't forget Jungkook, every fire creates smoke, and it blurs your vision and clogs you gasping for air. She will fill you with smoke." Namjoon hyung confronted me while I just replied with a simple sentence. "Then at least I will not will empty."

I said everything truthfully leaving him speechless and looking in Hobi hyung's eyes, to tell him how serious I am about Y/N.

"If you don't tell her yourself, then I will." He challenged me, making me suddenly feel hollow. No, no, no this can't be happening. I have to convince him to keep hiding it but how- "No you won't tell her." I said again with a confident voice maintaining the sternness on my face.

"What make makes you think that, huh?" He questioned me forgetting the consequences he would have to face too if the cover blows out. "If you tell her the truth then she'll break her friendship with you too, because you were the one to tell her that in the place, it was your mistake, though I supported you, still I have a back up story too to cover it up for me."

He instantly went silent, listening to the harsh reality. No words came from anyone's mouth as all of them stared at me either with confusion, anger or poker face.

"It is not going to have a good end Jungkook, you don't know what has she suffered-" "I do, I know how has she caged up herself in these past years and how she-" I cut off by hyung when I was telling him that I know enough about her and her past.

He sadly chuckled looking down for a brief moment before staring me into the eyes again. "That's where you are wrong, she hasn't locked herself in any cage, she is the cage herself and she has always imprisoned her emotions and feelings behind the bars of her rough childhood and tough act which actually tells how weak she is and her stubbornness to keep them concealing from others. You have no idea how she'll react once our lie comes to an end. She will become numb to pain." He said showing me mirror to see myself as selfish person who is not being just with girl he lo-likes.

"Will you still not admit that you love her?" Jimin hyung stepped into the conversation asking me the same thing again to which I reacted by shaking my head in denial vigorously.

"Then I have a good plan, in which Jungkook has to never tell the truth and Hoseok's point gets into consideration?" Yoongi hyung who has been silent all the time spoke up.

"Move out of the house Jungkook." My heart stopped beating for a split second. "You just like her right, so it won't be very difficult to do it, infact you will get to see and talk to her at the university. Hang out with her as much you want but pack your stuff and move out."

He stated in a bold commanding voice. Why are they doing this to me, why only my stories have to be written with a pen which doesn't work properly.

First Jihee, then Y/N, why? I was on the verge of crying, because it was hurting now, their words worked as knife stabbing me in the heart repeatedly. But they are correct too, why is it so difficult for me to leave her, why does she has to occupy my mind, my heart, my soul, all the time. Why I am so afraid to lose her? Just why?

There are so many unanswered questions, with a single word in common 'why'.

I questioned myself again and again as my thoughts revolved around the same person.

"No I told you I won't lose her-" " You will not lose her, you can see her at the university." Yoongi hyung said interrupting me.

"No, you all clearly know that I can't talk, smile, laugh, and whatever with her in the university. I can't be with her like this. I want to stay near her all the time.....why do you guys do this to me all the time. Can't you stay happy for once seeing me happy with someone. What you always want me to do is love someone, feel affectionate and then break the connection and give her to someone else like a posession, like I don't have feelings huh! and even after all this, you try to console me that everything is fine, when it is not. You have always blamed me in this situation, why can't you ever open your eyes and see the situation from my perspective. Can't you agree we with me for once?"

I broke down in front of them crying out all the unfair things that has happened to me because of them. It now too much for me to keep inside, just to much.

"And yes I am addicted to her, so now try doing whatever you want but will stick and be persistent about it!" I told them looking straight into their eyes to let them know that I am serious.

"But Jungkook this question arises again, will she ever see you as a potential partner?" Jimin hyung again contradicted.

"The feeling i have for her has overshadowed my possibilities with her. I like the way things are going between us-" "Exactly you like them you don't love them. It hurts you because the feeling isn't mutual, you can't do everything you actually want or express the way they are. I am right? You want her to love you back."

I feel silent, he was stating the truth, I want to her to reciprocate my feelings, it hurts not being able to kiss or touch her even after being so close.

It hurts a lot.

"Jungkook can't you see that what is the girl doing doing to you, why are you still so stubborn, you have a passion, talent, goal, why are you still stubborn?" Jin hyung spoke in between making my jaw clench.

"Because it is my stubborn heart and you can nothing about it. The road you all want me to take will break me from the core, every step I take forward and you have no right to say between this mess. You have already made me suffer once, wasn't that enough, after 3 years I feel myself again and now to want to take that too! Isn't Jihee enough! This is the same place! the same people! where you left me broken. Do you remember?!"

                      ○ Flashback ○

"WHAT! Are you kidding me?! Was it all fake?...even last night didn't mean anything to you?!" I questioned Jihee noona in front of everyone screaming on top of my voice not believing that the only person whom I have loved forever, with whom I planned my future, marriage, kids; sacrificed my dreams for, went on to dates with and lost my virginity to was acting the whole time.

"I am sorry Jungkook, I really am, I realized today in the morning that I was taking you too deep with me in my lie and you are so true and pure to be put up in a fake love like this, so I myself came up to confess." She gave an stupid excuse to make her look good in front of others. I could read it clearly in her eyes still not believing myself.

"Tell me truthfully, not a moment you spent with me, all the words you spoke to me and all the touches you gave me weren't real." I asked with tears still flowing endlessly out of my eyes still not believing the fact that I was being used since one and a half year.

"Jungkook my heart was always named under only one person and it is Jin. When you proposed me, I couldn't say no and I thought that you were young in love and we break up after a few weeks, so using that reason as a sympathy I will tell my feelings to Jin oppa, and he will definitely take me in. By none of it happened, I saw you making every effort that was possible on your side to make the relationship stronger, so even I played along not knowing what to. My only motive to be with you was getting close with Jin oppa."

My world collapsed in front of me seeing the two most important people in my life stabbed me on my back.

"Jungkook I am so sorry but, when she told me that she loves me, I can't help but accept her. We share the same feelings." He put his point forward. I wanted to run away, miles far here, and scream out all my frustration, till I voice is snatched away from my throat, and my vocal cord tore apart.

How can she not any feelings, how can she be so inhumane to lie to me for more than a year. I had literally named my every living breath after her and she knew it. How could someone possibly break an another person even after knowing how he feels about her. It is like your own loved one is pushing you off the cliff.

"Jungkookie it will be ok, we are here for you." Taehyung hugged me, taking me in to comfort me but I felt nothing, all I could see was Jihee noona's and Jin hyung's fingers tightly intertwined and otherwise I was numb.

"Jungkook please forgive us, if not me then at least him." She apologized. She faked it. She was the one to stab me in the back, and acted like she was bleeding.

"Jungkook you should forgive Jin hyung ,it is not his fault to fall in love and as for her it is upto to you." Yoongi hyung explained me.

"Yes, he is right, don't break your friendship just because of a girl." Namjoon hyung added.

"Just forgive them, telling yourself that it was a lesson of life and move ,it will be fine." Even Hoseok hyung supported them.

"It is ok Jungkook, things like this happen, you just need to accept them and take the right step." Jimin hyung told me.

They all were adamant to make me forgive him or maybe them so I did. Or at least I thought I did. They were making me think that it is alright, and it is nothing to be hurt about but I am human and I have emotions ,how can they forget about it.

                 ○End of Flashback ○

"Do you remember?" I asked rudely. "You have messed my love life once, I won't let you do it again." I continued and stood up to leave the place. I walked to the door closing it violently behind me.

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Hey readers, do u now get all the mess in the story?

I don't want u guys to hate any of the characters in the story, they all have reasons for what they did.

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Love you ❤.