Met by Chance
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Babita_19

OMG THAT CLIFFHANGER!!

*Cough cough* Ehem...

But really, this book is great! I like the idea of the story, and the characters are great concepts!

You asked me to look for plot line and character development... And I say this as a person who greatly appreciates your work, and is just trying to help you grow as a writer but:

You were let down slightly by your spelling and grammatical errors. My advice would be to proof read! It's a great story, but your simple errors distract from the main object, which is the story itself! Maybe get a spell checker, like Grammarly, or get a friend or family member to read it over and correct things for you. I'm seeing a lot of "Iam" in your text, and a simple space could help clarify that. If you want me to, I can help you by going back over it and commenting any errors.

Remember the narrative you're using. If you are using first person (I/me) then stick to that. In the last few chapters particularly, you'll end a paragraph on "me" and then use third person narrative (she/her). You can make different chapters different narrative styles, you just need to let the reader know you've changed the POV.

Your plot is well thought out and structured, and I'm really enjoying the way this story is going! Naina is such a relatable character, and her friends are great!

I understand why you brought Amar in late, but maybe *because* he's a friend of Rehan's, you just mention him in the first few chapters, so we're not just thrown into meeting him without any idea of who he is or what his background/relation to Naina and Rehan is.

Just another thing, you don't *have* to include physical pictures of your characters. Your descriptions should be able to draw pictures of your characters in your reader's minds.

Please don't think I'm being rude, I'm just trying to help you develop as a writer! I love your writing, and I think with a little work, it can become even better! Xx