From account admin: We are posting the stories of those that want to share, and keeping them anonymous and allowing them to pick the chapter title. Thank you and God bless.
And don't forget we want everyone, both boys and girls to know they are priceless and we greatly appreciate any help.
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I guess you could say I come from a long line of short fuses. In other words, can get easily flustered, at least if pushed.
That being said I manage fairly well... Usually.
I don't remember when I started dealing with my pain by hurting myself. I think it may have been in high school at one point.

Earliest memory is going up the steps to our house and was upset at myself and one or both of my parents saw me hit myself in the rib area. I know it had happened before then, but I don't remember those times.

There have been times I have grabbed my wrist and will end up leaving red blotchy ugly marks that show were my fingers were tight and I just wanted to snap it.

Also scratching.... That may not sound very bad but I used to have long sharp fingernails and they could easily leave marks on me. Sometimes I would scratch my arm, end up wearing a long sleeve or applying makeup to the area if it didn't go away right away. Sometimes it was on my stomach, once it was bad enough that the scar of it did not go away for some time. It was an ugly reminder that I hated to see.

I don't know why I can get so angry at myself or why I sometimes can't stand to look at myself in a mirror. But I'm working on changing that.

I don't want to have to cover up scars or be afraid someone will see me hurting myself. I don't want those I love to be afraid to leave my side because they are afraid of what I will do.

I want to be moving forward and not harming myself.

A part of me realizes that God calls me priceless, to die for even, because that is just what Jesus did. But sometimes I have a hard time accepting that and remembering it apparently.

If Jesus is living in my heart, that makes me one of His temples, which means I shouldn't defile it(aka my body nor soul). It hurts me to think of the pain it causes Him to watch when we are hurting ourselves. He aches. He feels the same pain, worse even.

We need to remind ourselves, daily if need be, that He loves us and wants what is best for us.

Unlike the devil, who is the very root of our problems and the one that will cause us to anger or make us harm ourselves or others.

God bless, I hope my words have helped.