I don't have luck on my side. I never have. Which is why I don't believe in it. Then I did. Now I don't again. It doesn't matter who am, or how old I am, or where I'm from. It doesn't matter about me. Just what happened to me.

I have...problems. And lots of em'. Depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, insomnia and I'm prone to panic attacks. Yeah, I know, you don't believe me because nobody can have all those problems at once. Well that's fine, you don't need to. I don't need you to. I just need someone to listen, that's all. That's all I've ever wanted. To be heard. To be listened to. To be understood.

There was a time when that little prayer of mine, that little wish, was answered. When I met him. My friend. We first met when I was walking through the park and my head began spinning. Black dots clouded my vision and I found it hard to breathe. I collapsed, but I was still awake, and scared. I tried calling out for help, and although my voice was scratchy and hoarse, it couldn't have been hard for people to hear. But if they did, they didn't care, they moved on, they couldn't care less if I died. I couldn't move, it was like I was paralysed. Eventually, after a while of trying to get help or help myself, I gave up. I just lay there, staring at the sky, wondering what it must be like to live up there, when a face suddenly appeared out of nowhere and blocked my view.

He asked if I was okay. Obviously, that's the first thing people tend to do if they see someone in distress or any kind of trouble. It took effort, but I managed to shake my head, and without hesitation, he slid his arm under my back and lifted me to a sitting position. As soon as I sat up, I could breathe. Taking in huge gulps of air like it was a new type of drug. Eventually I had had my fill, and all the while, this random stranger had the patience just to sit with me. To stay with me. I looked up at him and he smiled. I smiled back. It was crooked and broken, but somehow I managed to do it. He asked me where I lived so that he could take me home. I didn't know this guy, I'd never seen him before, but...I trusted him. So I told him, and he did as he said he would. He took me home. Well, more like carried me.

When we got there, I was able to shakily stand on my own and fish out my house key. But, my fingers failed me when I tried unlocking the door, and my keys fell to the ground. Instantly the guy picked them up for me, but he didn't unlock the door straight away, he looked to me first for permission. I granted him access by shuffling to the side, and he unlocked and opened the door for me. I stepped inside and turned back to face him as he handed me my keys back. He asked if I was gonna be okay. Now, I didn't wanna lie to this guy, I mean, he may have just saved my life. I told him the truth. No. I wasn't gonna be okay. I had the weight of the world on my shoulders and everyone expected me to be able to carry them.

He asked me if I wanted him to stay. He said that he knew he was just a stranger, but he was hoping we could become friends. This was new to me. Not only did I just meet the guy, but now he's asking to be my friend, something I've never had before. And given my shitty conditions, it was a little much for me to handle. I started swaying, slowly at first, before I suddenly began to fall. I expected the ground. To meet the cold, concrete fate that my keys had just previously met. But I didn't. The stranger caught me. I was falling...but someone was there to catch me.

I told him I wanted him to stay, and that I wanted to be friends with him because...in that moment, I felt something with him. Now you'd think it was love...but it wasn't. I felt...safe...with him. Now since that day, me and him have been inseparable. We hardly spent any time apart. I'd like to think it was because we were just really good friends or something was budding, but I knew deep down that he mostly stayed with me to be there. To be there to catch me if I should ever fall. Of course I fell, many times, but this guy was a man of his word. And he was there, to catch me, every time I fell. That's when I got my first taste of luck. Sweet and honest. But not...permanent.

It was a really shitty day, rain, dark clouds and all when we realised I was running low on my medicine prescription. I'd said that I'd have to make a quick trip, but he told me to stay, and that he would go for me. I tried to reason, that we could go together, but he was persistent and in the end I let him go. The pharmacy wasn't far, just a couple of streets down, so I didn't worry too much. After all, it was just a bit of rain. About four hours later, he still wasn't home, and I panicked. I ran outside into the still pouring rain and started sprinting in the direction of the pharmacy. When I got there, police cars were scattered around and an ambulance was parked somewhere in the middle of them. I began screaming his name, hoping desperately for an answer. And then I got one.

An officer offered me his condolences and showed me my friends leather wallet, a picture of me and him inside. Apparently it was impossible, the officer said. He could have never seen the car coming before it was too late...

I didn't want to see his body. I didn't want to see anything. I dropped his wallet and ran. And ran. And ran. I didn't know where I was going. I didn't care. I just wanted this feeling inside of me gone. Something...I'd never felt before. And it hurt. It was painful, and it was far too much to bear. Eventually my breath shortened and I had to stop running. The rain still pelted down onto me, every drop seemed to land harder and more colder than the next. I was drenched and hurt and freezing and I wanted it to stop. I wanted everything to stop. I guess that prayer was answered as well. Because I started falling. But this time...there was no-one to catch me. And as I neared the ground, I remembered something my friend had once told me..something that scared me but at the same time meant so much to me. He said that he had to ways be there for me. To catch me if I fell. That way, I could fall all I wanted to.

But if there's no-one there to catch you...you'll fall.

And it'll hurt.

And you won't be able to get back up.

And you'll just stay there and stare at the sky.

And after I had finished falling. There was no-one there for me. And I couldn't get back up. And through the rain, I looked up at the sky. And I wondered what it must be like to live there. My friend must know. Wait here listeners, and I'll go and ask him now.