Jasper

I know something is wrong with Malia. Despite what she thinks, I heard her in the restaurant. She thinks no one knows her, but I do. I know she purses her lips when she is thinking, I know two small wrinkles appear between her eyes when she is stressed, and I know that when something is bothering her, she tries not to look me in the eyes.

Maybe she knows I see right through her. Maybe she knows she can't hide everything. I don't know. All I know is that something is bothering her, and it is big.

I feel bad about leaving her to go meet Cami, but I can't force her to talk to me. She will come to me when she is ready. At least, I hope she will.

My thoughts are consumed with Malia and whatever the hell is going on with her. I miss the turn off for Cami's house. Cursing, I turn around and try to push the thoughts away. I really need to focus on my date tonight.

I shake my head, willing the thoughts of another girl to go away. I need to keep my head in check. It isn't fair to Cami to be thinking of Malia, even if it isn't in any kind of wrong way.

I pull up and plaster on a fake smile, jumping out to walk to her door. It's a date, so I can't just honk and wait for her to come out. That would be rude. My moms raised me better than that.

I force another smile, just as I reach the door. I wonder if anyone can tell that my smile isn't genuine these days. No one has really seemed to notice. It's not that I'm not happy, it's just that life has gotten boring. It's the same hum drum shit day in and day out. I need more. Sure, home life is one big epic story, but it doesn't feel like enough.

Stories. All I ever hear is the stories of how each of my siblings came to be with us. The stories of our amazing adventures as a family. Stories about how my moms met and fell in love. But what is my story?

I knock gently on the door, smiling again as Cami opens it. She's wearing a red dress that barely skims her knees, and I take her in appreciatively. She's beautiful in a non-traditional way. Her long blonde hair is cascading down her shoulders in waves and her eyes glitter with gold shadow.

"Ready?" I ask.

"Of course." She smiles and I take her hand, leading her to my car.

I open the door for her and close it as she settles in. My mind drifts back to my thoughts, wondering why I feel this way. I've had an amazing life. I have two wonderful moms who love me endlessly, yet still I yearn for something more.

I can't quite place my finger on it. All I know is I have this void inside my heart where something is supposed to be. Maybe it's a father?

No. I wouldn't change having two moms for anything in the world.

I get in, crank the car and take Cami's hand in mine. She smiles and rubs her fingers against the back of my hand.

The ride is quiet, only the sounds of the music softly pulsing through the speakers. I keep thinking back to Malia and wondering if she is okay. I know it's terrible, but I can't help it. She looked so haunted today.

As we pull up to the restaurant, I quickly fire off a text.

I meant what I said. I'm here whenever you need me. -J

I tuck my phone in my pocket and get out to open Cami's door for her.

"Everything okay Jasper?" Cami asks.

"Yeah. I was just texting a friend real quick." I smile at her and pull her forward to the restaurant doors.

We are seated quickly and I watch as she scans the menu. I've been here so many times I already know what I want.

The waitress walks up and quickly takes our order, walking with a flourish to the back.

"So, how was your day?" Cami asks.

"Nothing too special. I've just been busy prepping for the birthday blow out bash this weekend. B wants something spectacular as always."

Cami fidgets in her seat, looking up to meet my eyes.

"About that, I'm sorry I can't come." She looks sad, and I know it can't be helped.

I mean, I really want her to come, but I'm not angry that she can't. Everything is relatively new between us anyways. I don't want it to become awkward.

"I know. It's okay, I shouldn't have invited you so last minute." I give her another smile, loving the way her cheeks blush red.

The waitress brings our drinks, and I take a sip to ease the dryness in my throat. I don't know if it's my nerves or what, but I suddenly feel a bit weird. My stomach is doing weird flips and my palms feel twitchy. I clasp my hands in my lap to calm myself.

"How about you? How was your day?" I ask, looking up to meet her eyes again.

"Same old same old. Training for competition day in and day out. My horse, Whitey is rather nervous on the jumps. I am not sure if he's going to be ready in time."

I nod, knowing nothing about this kind of thing. The waitress returns with our soup and sandwich and I quickly take a bite to ease the awkwardness.

"So Jasper, tell me something you've never told anyone before." Cami says, blowing on a spoon full of soup.

"Hmm."

My life is an open book. My moms jump at the chance to tell anyone who will listen our stories. There isn't really much about me that someone doesn't already know.

"Okay well when I was fifteen, I had this date with this really hot girl. All the guys around the locker room were talking about sex and how great it was; so me being the total idiot that I am, I decided to go to the convenience store after school to buy some condoms- you know just in case. I'd never really seen them before, so I was browsing the aisle, trying to figure out what to get. I mean shit do you know how many different types of condoms there are?"

Cami was looking at me intently and a slow smile spread across her face as she shook her head that yes, she did in fact know.

Hmm. Maybe she's not a virgin?

"The guy next to me on the isle- a senior I recognized from school- decided to take pity on me. Obviously I looked confused or something. He started to explain the difference between each condom and then he told me his favorite brand. Embarrassed, I decided to just get it over with and I grabbed the box he had suggested."

Cami tries to stifle a laugh, but fails. I laugh along with her.

"Anyways, I walk up to the counter and the man behind the counter just looks at me all weirdly then shakes his head, muttering something about 'young boys these days' and quickly checks me out. A bit later, when I go to pick her up, I get all the way to the door and just as I reach up to knock, a car pulls in the driveway. Awkwardly I turn to see who it is, and it's the guy from the convenience store. Obviously he was her dad. I was so horrified I ran all the way home and told my moms that she cancelled the date due to the flu. To this day, I've never told anyone that." 

Cami laughs so hard she clutches her stomach and slaps the table. I mean, it's funny but not really that funny.

"You're so damn cute." She says between laughs.

"Cheers." I say, holding my sandwich up in the air.

Cami picks up her sandwich, gently tapping it against mine like you would click together wine glasses.

"Cheers."

I decide to go for it, knowing that there's no better time than now to seal the deal with a kiss.

If I'm lucky, I will get to kiss her all night in the back of my car.

I lean across the table, and go in for a kiss. My eyes close as I get close to her lips. A quick sharp pain shoots up my nose and Cami screams a little. My eyes fly open and her nose is pouring blood. I can feel it seeping into my shirt.

Fuck. Just break her nose would ya?

"I'm so sorry. Oh god. Here." I shove a napkin at her, horrified that I had misjudged the distance and somehow busted her nose with mine.

Cami starts to laugh again, holding the tissue to her nose. I force an awkward smile, knowing I ruined the date. I'm ready to throw in the towel and call it quits when Cami slips out of the booth and comes across to my side. Thankfully, her nose has stopped bleeding.

The moment she sits down, her hands are in my hair and her face is coming towards mine. I open my mouth to protest, somehow knocking her with my teeth and I can taste the metallic blood. I look down and realize I'm covered in her blood, then I look back up with wide eyes to her busted lip.

This must be a sign from the earth that this isn't meant to happen.

Twice in a row? Fuck me.

"Cami, fuck. Are you okay?" I reach up to pull her hands away from her mouth, surveying the damage.

Her lips is busted wide open and I instantly start to panic.

What if she thinks I'm a loser now? What if she tells everyone at school I'm a horrible kisser?

"I'm fine." She says, awkwardly smiling at me.

"As much as I really want to spend this night kissing you, I really think I should get you home. I'm so sorry. Nothing like this has ever happened before."

Cami nods, holding the napkin to her lip. She laughs, looking up at me.

"Don't worry Jasper. I was a little too eager I think. It was half my fault. I'm sure you're a great kisser."

Her words ease the tense panic that is rising in my chest. I want to go crawl into a hole and never come out again. B is gonna have a field day with this shit.

I quickly pay the check and escort Cami from the restaurant to the car. When she is settled, I crank the car and speed off towards her house. I don't dare speak because I'm so embarrassed I think I might just die if something else happens.

When I pull up at her house, Cami looks back at me and gives me another smile.

"Despite the mishap, I had a really great time." She offers.

"Me too."

Cami leans in quickly and kisses my cheek, lingering for a moment as if it would be our last moment together. At this point, I'm not sure what happens next.

"Bye Jasper." She says.

"Bye Cami."

Could this day get any worse?

I pull my phone out, knowing that I need to talk to someone and deciding immediately who that someone is gonna be.

I'm heading home. Can we talk? -J

I pull out of Cami's driveway and start to head back. My phone pings and I refuse the urge to look at it.

At the redlight, I glance down and smile.

Sure. Is everything okay? Your date didn't last long. -M

Hell no, it's not.

I have no idea how I'm gonna explain the blood all over me to my moms, so I go for something bold.

Fuck no. I need you to distract my moms so I can get in without being seen. Please? -J

The light turns green and I gun it, reaching my house in record time. I quickly pull my phone back out.

Yeah. -M

I'm here.  Is the coast clear? -J

I consider just stripping out of my shirt, but I feel like it would be weirder to walk in with no shirt.

Yeah. -M

I quickly jump from the car, hitting the lock button and rush inside.